Suuuuuuuuper common leak that people try to 'exploit' without having a clue what the optimal solution would look like. Can't really get mad that a lot of people ITT don't realise that.

+1 keep updating even if irregularly OP. WTF else you gonna do when you're 1 tabling for 4 hours!?

No need to stop updating because of some dbags trying to **** on your results while learning a new format.

Keep up the good work & updating

Pretty much this. Just go ahead and ignore what MTT regs have to say about strategy. They "exploit" based on feelings.

Only gonna speak for myself here and will be the last post I make itt before I go back to lurking only. Not ****ting on OPs results at all, in fact I think he`s making good progress and as a small/midstakes reg it`s not my place to criticize anyone on any results anyway, nor am I inclined to do so. But despite enjoying OPs updates with gifs and whatnot, it rubs me the wrong way that he replies to any comment that tries to help or says more than `good job, keep it up` with a snarky, extremely arrogant sounding piece of blabber that is just a pain to read.

That said, not my place to complain about it. It`s his thread and I will refrain from posting in it and wish him GL either way Hope the updates continue too

Hey sorry if my post came of the wrong way, it looks a bit harsher than it was intended. Just looks like your mindset it not optimal but I can understand that these threads are for venting. I do think the best way for crushing MTTs is knowing the equilibrium strategies and deviating slightly vs the pool, so you are on the right track

Many parts of my life changed since the last time I did an update. Not for the best. We broke up with my girlfriend. A situation which turned my progress in the mtt world into a small disaster. I had several deep runs before April, actually I felt I had deep runs every other day, ev bb was comfortably sitting at 8 and I shipped big 109 or big 215 (I dont remember), finished second on 530 bounty builder while I had a big chiplead advantage but then stars took over and a few other final tables which I didnt manage to convert



I was three months into an insane schedule. I was studying 5-6 hours every day and I was trying to grind at least 3-4 times per week. I promised my woman that I never do anything poker related one day per week and I will spend that day entirely with her. Unfortunately I started studying a lot in that day too. As a result I kinda pushed her away. She was complaining that we dont go out, we dont have fun. I was thinking it was ok because she was going out with her friends and I could buy some more time of studying and then spent more time with her during the summer



She started telling me that she wants to go out WITH ME more and she doesnt feel like she is living with me. I told her I dont know if i want be with her anymore and she told me the same. It seemed the most logical thing to do back then



I think we have a short life and time flies. I do think she will be more happy without me. I told her to pack her stuff and move out. I have the worst time of my life since then. I miss her a lot. Its very strange to walk around the house and dont see any of her stuff or to sleep at night without her. I didnt do anything poker related the past 10-15 days. I cant concentrate at all. I am watching movies and I cant even concentrate there



I consider two people as family. Her and my brother. It is very weird when you lose half of your family. I didnt expect to be so painful. I was in a relationship before. A longer one. When I broke up I was fine. Now its different. I can understand why many couples are staying together when they have children. I assume the pain is much bigger when you have to stay apart from a person you knew for 10-20-30 years and you created a family



The sad part is that even if she asked me now if I want to be with her, I would have said no most likely. I dont feel poker is that important anymore. I am trying to heal myself and I dont think I would like to go through this again. We broke up in ''good terms'', no fight, many tears, many times I or she said sorry for this and that. I deleted her from social media (which is a mistake) but it was part of my healing process. Maybe I am bull****ting myself

I did many mistakes in my relationship and I think 95% of this breakup is my fault

1) I stopped being fun. I became a couch potato. I never did anything fun the last 3 months. We barely went out even though we like drinking and partying. We spent a few hours we had free in front of tv which was a very big mistake

2) I was eating way unhealthy. Even though she tried really hard to eat healthy I always win when I want to do something. I ate a big family ice cream every single day. I got addicted to ice cream and pizza. My weight was skyrocketing from 85kg to 105kg which isnt good especially when I am only 182cm. I was sad but I couldnt stop. She tried to stop me but I always win. Unfortunately

3) I wasnt involved in her social circle and she didnt in mine. She was complaining that she never met my friends and I never met hers. Which is sad because she is the most fun woman I ever met and I am pretty sure we would have great time with my friends



I tried to play the sunday million which of course I lost this hand and I went crazy. I was fuming and I understood that I am not mentally ready to start grinding again.







I was navigating through facebook when my eye caught this: ''i really know that it can never be healed if you stay in your room all day and wait for a magic change. You have to push and in the beginning its the hardest thing in the world'' I was thinking about that and I understood I am not doing anything to actually heal myself. All I do is watching sports and movies, keep eating pizza and some ice cream. I was on Tinder and Badoo while I had many matches and many opportunities to go out for a drink, I couldnt imagine myself ****ing another woman. It hit me hard when a girl text me at 0500 asking if she could come in my appartment and I didnt even answer. I decided to buy a book called ''The Break Up Manual For Men: How To Recover From A Serious Break Up, Become Stronger and Get Back Into Life''
from Andrew Ferebee



This book is very helpful. Even though I cant really grind at the moment I should start working on myself and poker will come again naturally. I miss the game, A LOT, but I cant focus at all. While reading that book I understood that I should be thankful with the experience I had and learn what I did wrong. I was never a relationship guy, I prefer to be alone and I do my own **** but I felt so much pain the first days. That book helps me to make peace and slowly move on It helps me to focus on myself



I should become who I was borned to be



I dont think I will have any poker related goals the next months even though I think I will start grinding a lot again this week, I know that poker isnt the most important aspect in my life. I will dedicate many hours again but not in expense of other important things

My goals until the end of this month are

-Hit the gym 5 times working with AFL of kinobody. Start with very light weights until I get back on track again and TRACK EVERYTHING lifting weight, macros, measurements
-Drink 8 glassed of water every day
-Update every day even if it is one line with gym progress and macros
-Eat good food unless out with friends
-Dont miss a single opportunity to go out with friends
-Start studying a few hours the next days and play at least two sessions until the end of the month

All in all I understand I should become more fun again. I am looking back and I understand it was a mistake dedicating so many hours in only one area of my life. In the end not only I didnt feel happiness and fullfilment but it destroyed my relationship. I have to make peace with everything that happened in my past, learn my lessons and enjoy life

Event tough i ve never been a professional player, i used to spend my free time (friday nights, sundays) playing poker. Only sometimes i had my family (wife and 2 kids) out for funny family things and almost never had time alone with my wife besides watching tv and maybe eating something nice at home. When i did something nice with them i was always thinking about poker. In some way i blame the game and obviusly myself for the divorce. Spent 9 years togheter but when i was kind of obsessed with poker (like for 2 years) my family went down. Not saying that poker is the cause of my divorce but it surely helped a lot. Thinking and feeling as í felt later im full aware that this passion, hobby or job that is playing this card game is not 1% as important as family.
Sorry for the long introduction and í know you have not asked for advice, but anyway here goes mine:
Don t let her go. You seem to love her. Make the changes in your life necessary to be in a good place with your family. There is nothing more important than that. Even if you have to sacrifice money or whatever.
Hope you heal yourself or try to fix things with her. To feel as you seem to feel now is something i do not wish to anyone.

Very nice post beltha, all the best getting your **** together!

Yo, Belta. Nice to have you back and thanks for sharing this stuff with us. Regarding your goals, I think you should add another one (the one, that should be most important for you). And stop bulls*** yourself. All the best for you and keep fighting!

I surprised myself today. I didnt expect that I was going to hit the gym but yes. One small win every day is all I need. I dont even remember when was the last time I lifted some weights. I did 3 cardio sessions a month ago but that was it. My plan is to do extremely light weights for the first two weeks and slowly build up



My macros will be

calories: 2304
protein: 202
fats: 77
carbs: 201

until I drop down to 95kg when I am going to adjust everything again

Quite close today





I finished the book I am reading for second time. Quite helpful but I think the advice I got from a friend was much more valuable. I didnt make peace that I broke up but I accepted that. I accepted the fact that we will never going to be together again most likely. She didnt try to contact me and it is enough for me

I am thinking to pickup a hobby but I have to consider how much free time I will have when I start working again. I didnt do anything poker related which isnt good. I have to study at least. Otherwise I am in danger to become rusty. This is the worst case senario with the upcoming series in ps and pp

Tomorrow

202 gr protein ?
its way over what your body needs

I felt blue yesterday night. I decided to take a walk near the bay. My goal was to clear my mind, enjoy the view and the weather during the night. I saw so many beautiful women who made my darkness leave. It was a nice trick and I enjoyed the challenge of deceiving my mind. I cant imagine myself ****ing another woman, yet I did enjoy some beauty for my eyes. I dont know if I have average standard or I just like women but I found 80% of them attractive. Either way its a win win situation for myself



My goal is to build a mental state where I would start picking up again after the series, something I didnt do for 2 years. I always enjoyed the time I was going out alone or with Adam and picking up random women. I was in Thailand back then which isnt a challenge. I found more difficult having one night stands in Malta. Most women like to date first while in Thailand you can do whatever the **** you want, even if you are semi attractive success is guaranteed. I havent stayed in Malta for longer periods. It was more like my base where I stayed one month and travelled six. Malta is a party island during the summer, ironically it is the place where I had the least sex experience. It will be quite interesting to observe what will happen the following months here



Text game still strong though even against ''7s''





I had a few more matches I could close but not really in mood. I just like the game



I did hit the gym today. Two for two. I had a cardio session



Meal was the same as yesterday





I was passing by a massage parlour today. I asked the price for foot massage, 25euros half hour 40 euros one hour. I think it is way expensive but I was like ok I do need a massage. I should do things that I enjoy more often. The woman was a 37 years old chinese rated at 4. Definitely not attractive. We talked about her family in China, my girlfriend, she gave me some investment advice (lol), we talked about her culture and how much I liked my time in Asia. I did enjoy the convo but the massage was just ok. In the end she asked if I want extra massage for 10 euros. I was like ''eh why not'' but I didnt have more money with me, she confirmed I can bring the moniez later and the party started. Midway I undressed her and she had suprisingly nice titties. Her noise ''come on you have to finish my boss will see from cameras we are taking long'' didnt help but her titties did. I dont think I will visit this parlour again but it was a (not new) experience nontheless



I was in mood to study today so I put two solid hours of studying. I might have put more if Real wasnt playing. Time to enjoy the game. Hopefully I will throw 1-2 sessions until Sunday. I will definitely grind on God's day otherwise it will not be a God's day if God is missing (I kid I kid)



I started reading another book. I did so many things that I start to believe being single suits me

I'm still in agony thinking about it. This relegation has been brutal. Like being burnt at the stake rather than shot in the head. So easily avoided. Just want it to be over now as it's the hope that kills.

Lebron James is not a human. What he does on the court is just not real. It is heartbreaking he has to fight with a bunch of average players. Cavs have only Lebron made by champion material and noone else. Love is working hard on every single game and he seems to be a really good guy but he isnt good enough. I wonder if those people around Lebron are feeling ****. Like you see this person working his ass off and on the court and you are average. I wonder if they put many hours of trying to be better players or they just dont care. I would like know what they are thinking when Lebron has to grind every game on video game mode when they cant even score more than 10 points



Real Madrid very clinical yesterday. Noone played really well aside from Ramos. It was a mistake to let Benzema on bench imo but Zidane>>>>>me. Bayern had 1-2 really good chances but their goal was a huge mistake by both Navas and Marcelo. I do feel Madrid was quite lucky because Robben got injured and Ribbery cant score. I cant wait next week and see what happens. I dont think Bayern will submit in Bernabeu easily (hopefully I will be wrong)



I the gym again today. Three for three



Nutrition spot on so far





I was feeling blue after the gym. I was cooking and I remembered my gf but I managed to put 3 hours of studying and I might put 1-2 more after Arsenal's game. I will force myself grinding tomorrow even though I dont feel like playing now. The thing I am afraid the most is that I will not be able to put a quality session. It will be more a session to be a session and that is not good



I need to start grinding at some point, better earlier than later. Success breed success but you cant be successful unless show up on the tables

Arsenal can qualify unless they will play as in EPL. They need to be more careful defensively. If they play as they played vs Ham then Costa will rape them but I dont remember when was the last time Wenger cared for the defensive structure of his team. Hopefully we will watch a good game

So i suppose Kevin Love is worse than Miles Turner ?
George Hill is worse than Collison ?
Korver is worse than Sabonis ?
Nance is worse than PJ Tucker ?

Indiana is far better team than Cavs, better prepared, hungrier and coached a lot better - it's not about individual quality or lack of talent in CLE, they have plenty of talent.

+ Now we can see clearly how much underrated Kyrie was.

More massage parlor stories..

and lets be real.. you didn't go in for a foot massage hahahha.

gl gl bel

fly me to asia to be ur prodigy lets get it popping

actually loved those highlights with that commentary

Cant blame the Cavs for not trying to put more talent around LBJ when they arent even sure if he is going to sign with them again next year.

Arsenal went full Arsenal again and got exposed by their defense. Score should be 2-0 by half time but Wellbeck

Came across with this channel. It seems solid



The dude is so funny, I will definitely watch moar



I started playing today but quickly regretted. I feel much better playing but I dont have the mood to fight against scamstars. Plan was to grind 5-6 tables if i ran a bit good in the beginning, otherwise i would fire 2 bullets on 530bb, the big 109 and late reg the marathon. Ran like **** and i called it a day. 2+2 converter is going bananas

https://replayer.raiseyouredge.com/-LB7Lk6Sj5boMTH1TdvX

https://replayer.raiseyouredge.com/-LB7LP-8rXOiISUFyzGz

Epic session signed by the biggest online platform



I got one table left, then read a book and watch Lebron. Noone is going out tonight unfortunately

Ev bb is still at 6.4+ at 160$+ abi even though the month is disgusting so far with ev bb at -5.33 I have to give myself a point for loading. Next day is a new day. I will start to meditate in order to prepare myself better against these scams



I hit the gym again. Four for four. The plan is to workout again tomorrow and on Sunday will do some home cardio or rest and prepare for the grind

Cardio session today



Nutrition is perfect at the moment





Hopefully Lebron will pull some miracle tonight

It's a pity tbh, even with Kyrie, Cavs barely had enough firepower to challenge Warriors. Interesting to see how the Cavs move forward if we brick game 7 to Pacers. Obv when Cavs run well, when Love, Korver, and Smith are cooking, it's an unbeatable team. But it's just not happening enough to win 7 game series'.

If somehow Cavs win this championship, with the current lineup, that will end the discussion of who the GOAT is forever. And that would be something special to sweat tbh. :')

Lebron dunked in a surreal fashion yesterday. Cavs were dissapointing. I would like to see Cavs vs Celtics in playoffs. It will be such an ego game

My plan to hit the gym failed. My plan to grind failed. All good

I didnt hit the gym and I chose to rest today instead of tomorrow because Cynergi is super busy on Saturday. I went only once that day and it was horrible. I could do a cardio session but I didnt want to push myself from the beginning. Definitely going tomorrow

Busier than usual according to google:



I thought it might be better if I eat 400 cals less today but I got advised not to





I had so much motivation to grind. I started studying since I woke up but five six hours later I was too tired to load. I thought it wouldnt be possible to grind today 8-10 hours + 5-6 hours studying and put a solid session tomorrow. Definitely grinding tomorrow



I have many personal development goals. I would like to get out a much stronger person than before and improve several aspects of my life that I didnt take care for a very long time. I am watching less sports, less movies, less series and I am focussing on reading, walking, working out and poker. I will go out more often in the future and I might have some interesting stories to share



I have to prioritize where I would like to focus

-gym The most important at the moment. I was stupid that I didnt hit the gym regularly. Not only I feel much better, I have time to listen podcasts

-poker The second most important. From Sunday onwards, I will grind 4-5 times per week, giving myself two days per week doing stuff I like or I didnt have time to try before

-personal development This is focussing mainly on books/meditation/stretching/styling and pickup

My main focus will be on first two until end of May. Then I will start focussing on the third aswell. I am feeling much better writing for all this ****. Poker seems like a mountain at the moment. It takes so much energy to even keep myself focussed after the breakup but I am happy I started studying/grinding again. Baby steps

hey, good luck on your journey to greatness.

In regards to red pill mentality I can recommend reading The Rational Male from Rollo Tomassi. He is the godfather of this **** and it is safe to say that book has changed my life in so many aspects. He is not a PUA, though

Keep up the mindset and you are gonna crush this

Take it from someone who switched from SNGs/Spins to MTTs -- finding that work/life balance is much harder in tournaments. I used to be able to take breaks during the session of varying lengths; some were short, like a 10-15 minute breather to collect my thoughts (i.e. inject logic, avoid tilt) and some were longer, perhaps spending an hour or two at the gym, with the GF, etc. But now I'm mostly glued to the chair for 6-7 hours in a row and being more than a fat, distant, button clicking blob requires discipline. You've def got the work ethic to succeed, so best of luck and I hope you continue to update us on the journey.

Side note: Realized I never got back to you on Skype, my bad. Been super busy struggling with a lot of the same stuff that you've got going on.

Remember guys its not only the emotional status and in person relationships that are at stake for us mtt players, but also (and most importantly) our overall health which we have to carefully take care of. Peace and gl

Today's workout showed how **** my condition is at the moment. I am feeling a pain on my back since the massage because the chinese used her elbows for a brief moment, until I was what the **** are you doing, soft not strong. I am trying to progress slowly in the gym. No rush from my part but this is so dissapointing. I hit 55kg on inclined bench press without an issue. Flat bench was the next. Oh boy. I had to do 6 reps of 50kg which should be done easily. Nope. My arms gave up on 6th rep



There I was standing with the bar above my chest, questioning every decision on my life. A year ago I could do 8 reps of double that weight without a spotter. How I let myself become such a crap? Why I made so many bad decisions? A trainer was passing by and I asked him to help me, ''you cant let go ha?'' he said, I would be more like shut your ****ing mouth but I was still replaying my life the last year and I took the no response path. Maybe this breakup is the best thing happened in my life. Who knows where I would be 2-3-5 months from now if I kept having this unhealthy lifestyle



Comfort is very dangerous. I understand that more and more. I became too comfortable. Thats why I was focussing only on one part of my life which in reality should be the third most important. This difficulty made me even more motivated to turn this around but time will tell



Nutrition spot on. I will do a refeed day on Friday most likely



I decided to move abs on cardio (maybe legs) day and I might use CAM from kinobody otherwise abs and HIIT



I am pleased with the quality of my session, ran into 4x AA 2x KK within the first 2.5 hours for big pots but I wasnt even bothered

Then this beauty came vs a whale and I wasnt bothered either




Not bothered at all. Actually I was like



I spam them with emails to find out what is going with a collusion case in 1000$ sngs we reported six months ago but they dont even care answering anymore. Quality support from the biggest poker site and I seriously consider contacting either Joey or Polk and share all details even if that would risk my account to get banned



I didnt bother with the above atrocities but losing another ******ed hand vs fish got me





Super annoyed and called it a day. Not loading anything else past million. I need to play more volume no matter how hard it is at the moment. I should create a schedule and pre register. Then play all tournaments. I will boost my volume by 50% no matter what happens starting tomorrow

Not good volume(only 8 tournaments) neither good results today (as expected with stars going bananas again)



Somehow overall ev bb holding comfortably over 6 with a disgusting April but yeah doesnt matter. I need moar. Moar ev moar moniez moar



''Distractions like porn, video games, youtube, Netflix become the ultimate place to kill time or to put it bluntly, where you sit and wait to die'' While reading this, I made the decision to stop pushing or making time to watch sports or series. Even though I reduced them I am still wasting a big portion of the week watching something which might be fun but not very useful

Series I watch: Flash, Big bang, Originals
Sports I watch: Most EPL games, every Real Madrid's and near every Barcelona's game and every Cavaliers game from NBA
1-2 movies per week

Series take 100 mins/week, sports from 10 up to 20 hours per week, movies 2-4 hours per week. That is an average of 17 hours per week, 70 hours per month, 700 hours approximately per year. It is like I am wasting one month per ten-eleven months doing something borderline useless which is insane. Starting tomorrow I will drop near everything tv related even EPL and NBA. I will watch only important matches like World Cup Quarter Finals+, Real in Champions League elimination+, El Classico and Mourinho's team on Champions League elimination+. I am dropping every single series except new Got season and I will limit myself to two movies per month. The only time I will watch NBA is while doing cardio session in gym. I left plenty of sports to enjoy but saving many hours to do more important things



I will stop the crap and pick old hobbies or new and get back into life