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Originally Posted by Oladipo
sub'd, glgl!
ty!
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Originally Posted by max85
solid results mate gg
<3 i remember the good old 100z days! what are you up to
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Originally Posted by belthazorrrrr
Very interesting blog. I wish I could detach myself from that overcompetitive overobsessed piece of **** I am. I wish I could be happy with small things and really enjoy my life. I just cant. I hope you will write more often in this thread
In hindsight, the following definitely wasn’t one of my smartest decisions, but back then it felt like I had to take those kinds of risks. I searched for homegames in my area and took my 2.5K Euros straight there. The game was shady as **** but I decided to go for it anyway and ran my 500 Euro buyin up to 6500 within 3 hours. Now the only problem was how the **** I was supposed to get out of this game. I was playing 3-handed with 2 extremely shady people that now hated my guts. So how the **** do I leave? I guess this is a story that deserves its own writeup, perhaps some other time. Eventually after some extremely shady happenings I manage to collect my 6.5k from what I believe some kind of mafia boss get the hell out of there.*
Details?
Reading your thread from the beginning made me having some deep thoughts. Best of luck
Hey, I appreciate this alot!
Yeah its very difficult to detach yourself. Today too I played a 2.5k session and made a pretty mini mistake and thats all what ive been thinking about.
We just gotta realise over and over again that none of this really matters, in a liberating way. Who gives a **** if you made small mistakes or even larger ones. Youre still alive, life is great and there is so much to enjoy, how amazing is that?
I was planning to write up details eventaully, Im actually quite a dick for always starting to write things and not ending them I guess, but they do take a lot of time and im pretty busy with my schedules and ****. I will think about when I can do that though!
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Originally Posted by ajmf5
In for the fap updates. I expect transparency if you slip up
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Originally Posted by LAKATOSKLAUS
Yes in for Fap updates. im in the 7/7 camp in this week
100% transparency, i dont lie remember
Also actually ****ing proud of LAKATOSKLAUS taht you decide to join!
So i havent fapped for a month now I think, last time should have been about mid jan.
It hasnt been easy.
I got laid quite often so that helps but the urges have definitely been strong.
Especially when girls send me hot nudes or I remember how "awesome" it is to fap to some kinky porn but I have kept myself together pretty well.
I also talk to some girls overseas sometimes over whatsapp/skype and they find it funny to tease me into jerking off but I have stayed strong, even if the ocassional stroke or two might have slipped in. You guys should srsly appreciate this transparency btw holy **** lol. There is one girl here that REALLY teases me and wants me to jerk off infront of her and tbh its so tempting cause shes so good and dirty talking, but idk if that would count as cheating. Its techincally still fapping but its with a girl? Thoughts?
I could just shut down all these attempts btw but its kinda fun haha.
In general I have an intersesting view on matters that require "discipline". In my opinion if you want to do something that is good for yourself, its actually just about love. How much do you love yourself? If you love yourself, then youll do whats best for youself always, period. Its completely non negotiable.
Update of month
So poker is solid I estimate my true winrate to be around 8ev at the moment. I decided to stop posting results with big $ figures since I always never thought it was a good idea to tell people how much money you have.
I might throw in the ocassional graph every once in a while to keep you entertained but it definitely wont be a regular thing.
Volume has been amazing i think im about 80k hands in rn.
But this came with the cost of me playing unfocused/tired at times. I think if I would 2 table low volume I could win at 10ev+ longterm. 500z is actually quite soft. And im trying hard to remain somewhat stoic and not namecall and insult any regs but its hard at times. Theres actually SO MUCH i wanna say about them but im sure its best to keep that to myself. mynameiskarl is good.
In general playing so much has some interesting effects. For once I feel the urge to chat/troll/trashtalk sometimes @the tables to keep the entertainment level up. I probably shoudl stop that. One of the average regs actually responded and after telling me it must be tough to never win a pot, he asked me what my winrate was lol. Alright bud. I checked and im actually up money against him.
Another funny convo I had was with one of the more toxic regs whos game I dont want to insult (stoic etc) but he probably wins vs pool and crushes fish pretty hard. I never chat to him but who keeps on writing a shark emoji to me. I then once told him id recommend him the Marcus Aurelius book. I was serious btw, since I heard other regs had toxic experiences with him. He responded I should get a proper education and I probably had terrible upbringing and parents. Alright bud. I actually have a 4.0 gpa too, lol.
I blocked his chat but I think he always writes to me still. He also recently slowrolled me, which I found amusing. If youre reading this, no hard feelings bud. But I would really recommend you to read this book. Cant hurt right? I hope you find your peace.
Anyway, the unfocusdness tiltendness resulted in me making some stupid mistakes at the tables that annoy me quite a bit.
Good thing is that I pretty much always learn frmo the mistakes, and just today I made a big realization of how I can increase my winrate further. Im actually tilted that this has cost me money in the past.
I think playing unfocused probably cost me about 3kusd this month. Maybe even more. So i should probably change that. I guess its a bit of a tradeoff with the volume but Im sure ill find a solution. (like taking breaks for example).
The rest of my goals have been going well. Ive been crushing eating and gym.
Ive been crushing my mornings. I have let go a bit of my night routine
but I go to bed at pretty much the same time every day and its chill.
Reading has been going a bit less since im ****ing tired at night but Im gonna finish marcus aurelius before the end of the month regardless.
No fap obv going well but im tempted a f to jerk off with a girl, its probably more sex than fapping, need to make my mind up on that.
The crypto evelaution is not happening often enough.
The no social media is going reasonable but sometimes i take a peak or two, guess thats kind of a failure. On the other hand gotta due diligence how hot those tinder girls actually are.
Hans wants to go to bali for his visa run and even though I dont need a visa run atm and it actually complicated things for me I decided to be a good friend and give him company. I would definitely enjoy a holiday anyway so theres that too. We still need to dicuss that stuff though, firned told me its wet season apparently.
I check this thread daily so if you want me to post more, just post and ill reply!
Last edited by CRAIBaby; 02-19-2018 at 01:26 AM.