Walmart, pmed you

this is going to be my new backround for when i feel anything less than happy to be grinding through sessions ...

also that vid above for motivation is a great one i listen to them all day at the gym and when i grind gets me pumped so hard, theres some hour long montages of all of the popular ones il skype u them if u want add me im same as sn here bud gl this weekend

Good work man don't let the game beat up on you, just embrace it for what it is and enjoy the process

thanks d00d! yeah we realize how little our problems really are in the grand scheme of the world. poker problems can be pretty selfish and irrelevant to everyone else

@ squire: that quote is very smart and true. the main majority a lot of players enter a tournament they are -EV is because variance has deluded them to believe they are +EV, or they are just gambling because they realize they have a chance at winning (much like a lotto ticket).

he's absolutely correct about variance effecting your work ethic or mindset. so many players stop studying when they are winning. a lot of guys (myself included) can go on what i call "winners tilt". maybe losing a lot of the habits/mindset that made them successful in the first place when they are on an upswing. i find its easy to lose the hunger after a big win and play suboptimally.


Thanks for all the posts guys

yeah for sure, i had big scores early on, jumped up stakes before i knew what HRC , ICMizer PIO etc even was, was clueless on how to study how a hud worked etc, snap dropped heaps and heaps, then swithced to spins and studyed heads up basicly learned how to play poker propperly, and now am back loving mtts, know how to study have a great team of guys behind me (nohomo) just need to remind my self how lucky i am to do what i love and the places we get to go to play a card game in the world, its absurd, if we need to take some extended negative variance then who the **** cares

zen1888 in the making

haha im so glad that i ran really bad early in my career and avoided that in a way having backers who always held me lower in stakes was a great way to avoid big downswings but at the same time i think it lowered my potential ceiling. (ie you can't test yourself at high stakes if you never play high stakes)

thats the GTO viewpoint to have i think but its tough because our monkey brains make us not think rationally and if we are losing our natural response is to get mad/upset/feel we've been served with injustice. very good that you got in with a good circle of guys that you can work with...one of the most GTO things a man can do

Bonjour,
Hope everyone had a good week. I can assure you I celebrated Canada Day quite well and enjoyed a nice weekend in cottage country with some good people. I woke up feeling pretty good this weekend (well about as good as one could feel after a 3 day bender), and made a game time decision to cut the vacation a day short. Rushed home and flicked in as many tournaments as I could. Had a final 18 appearance in the mini SM, AK lost to AQ and AJ for like 3x 2nd place stack with 30 left and I never quite recovered from that beat. Feels like I haven't won an all in of relevance whilst deep in months (possibly true )...but we can't stop, we won't stop. Here's le weekly update:

Health:

Workouts Completed this week: (3/4)
Times leaving diet guidelines: 0...until the weekend...things were not disciplined.
20 Minute Meditation Session: 4/7
Books Read: 0/1
Body Weight +/-: -18 lbs. (since beginning of year)

Wealth:

Training Videos Watched: 3/1
Hours in the lab: 6/2
Sessions played: 3/4
Hours put into researching new avenues of revenue generation:2
Weekly Proft: -1009
Yearly Profit: +31 881
Live Poker Profit This Year: +9 963

Book Review: I should be finished "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a ****" this week. Really looking forward to it and have heard some great things. Will provide notes next week.

Hands:
https://www.boomplayer.com/24443679_EAA24EFB74
I really like my line here and I think it ravages vs. aggressive villains. I'm sort of capped when I check pre flop but I could easily have 35 here or some strong 2 pairs (would check some Ax pre)

https://www.boomplayer.com/24443639_B109B1B76B
the game is ez.

https://www.boomplayer.com/24443582_F8548223EF
decided to put the cape on the river here. really felt he wont check any pair on the flop 3 ways here so deduced he was super bluff heavy. river sucks because some of his Jx bluffs connect and he doesnt use a sizing that the population is using as a bluff very often. anyways stubbornly called river and got punished.

Random Rant of the Week

Rewind to June of 2014. Deep down I was confused and was really seeking to find meaning to a lot of my thoughts and behaviours. As sessions with a psychologist (I believe that's what she was?) were complimentary with tuition, I decided to go and talk to someone. After explaining a little bit about my past and current self she asked me "do you work? How do you pay for school?" I told her "I know red flags are going to go off for you in regards to gambling addiction etc...but please just don't jump to conclusions and listen. I play poker professionally etc etc." After answering some of the trivial "poker newbie" questions, she had a mild understanding of how I made a living from poker. She actually asked me a few questions that got me thinking a little bit...I tried to answer as honestly as possible.

After quite some talking she said these words: "Do you ever feel like subconsciously you use poker as a means to distract yourself? Do you feel like it's a way you can occupy your time and forget about some of the stuff that bothers you in school or your personal life?" After pausing to think for more than a few seconds I had a big realization. Poker was a battle field where I could excel, a distraction from the surroundings I was not happy in @ University, a place where I could keep my need for competition stimulated, and a game where I could feel a sense of achievement and self worth.

It is great to grind and study your ass off but its so important not to get deluded in your mission and purpose in life. When caught up in this niche world of online poker it's so easy to forget about the importance of maintaining a balanced life.

This brings me to what I've actually been thinking so much about this year...and that is the development of men in modern society. So much of that confusion that I had in my late teen years was because I was really not sure of my identity or my core values. Out of frustration, laziness, and confusion, I believe that I found myself in a vortex of poker where all of my needs of: competition, money, entertainment, and mental stimulation could be met.

So why do I think boys/men are growing up confused, depressed, anxious, or withdrawn?

1. A lot of kids don't have good/any male role models growing up. They might be raised by single mothers or have fathers who spend little time in the household. It is very important to have a strong male influence in youth (as well as female ofc). Most school teachers and care givers are female by nature. Inherently, the majority of our role models are female.

2. As gender equality has progressed and household roles etc have changed (everything has sort of become unisex) a lot of men have repressed some of their behaviours because they believe society will shun them for expressing themselves.

3. Men in the media give us an unrealistic representation of how we should behave/act/look. Much similar to how women are socially conditioned to not have sex with a lot of men or else they will become "sluts". We feel like we have these unrealistic roles to fulfill and I think that causes us to "withdraw" when they seem insurmountable.

4. The introduction of porn in modern society. Porn has NEVER been so accessible in human history. It is literally available 24/7 on a variety of websites/channels etc...Why is this a bad thing? Well I think it gives an easy outlet for sexual stimulation. With excessive use, stimulation needs to get higher to achieve arousal. I'm pretty sure it's been tested that frequent porn use leads men to lack connection and stimulation from real women. Moreover, instead of priming ourselves to become good mating partners (to fill sexual needs), we can have them met at almost any time we have some privacy and an internet connection.

5. Video games have never been so advanced and realistic in human history. Only in recent years would it be possible for a person to spend countless hours grinding away at some video game that is designed to get them addicted. It's so easy to get sucked into a virtual world and neglect important things irl.

With so much time spent on video games, many men have become withdrawn and depressed. Inherently, with so many hours logged in video games, junk food and lack of exercise become a staple. Our generation is far more obese than any other generation in history. Testosterone is the holy grail of male hormone, and that is shot in so many of us. Honestly, I think all of this is a colossal issue and we might not see the full repercussions of it for many years.

I strongly believe in gender equality etc... but I just wanted to make this post to raise awareness/shed some light on a lot of young guys who may be struggling day to day. It sucks having so many temptations around us to derail us from our best selves nowadays. I think these temptations should be made more noticeable and all men/women should be taught how to live great lives of meaning.

Here is the video from a Ted Talk that helped me gain a lot of organization and writing points for this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sgAu1i6aChs

Anyways, off to bed for me. Tomorrow I will spend getting breakfast and a hike in with a friend in the morning, then visiting another friend, then possibly visiting my family for dinner. Come Tuesday I'm gonna be slinging some HEAVY volume. Really feeling motivated to grind and improve the rest of 2017. I really feel like a few guys reading this post will be able to resonate. Thanks very much for reading. GN and GL this week LFG!

PS: Here's another Ted Talk I enjoyed: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ljqra3BcqWM

"The boiling frog is a parable describing a frog being slowly boiled alive. The premise is that if a frog is put suddenly into boiling water, it will jump out, but if the frog is put in tepid water which is then brought to a boil slowly, it will not perceive the danger and will be cooked to death."

Very important that I re-establish a solid routine this week. Things have been sporadic with traveling/grinding/broken hand/holidays/other ****. Apologize if it's boring but need to make myself an outline here that I can hold myself accountable for. To wrap up Monday: begin "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a ****", meditation session, then solid 8h 15m sleep.
Tuesday: Work out/get physical activity in the preceding hours to a long grind session. Finish some more modules from poker training.
Wednesday: Read a good chunk of the book. Run errands. Ultimate Frisbee @ night. Do a bunch of lab work.
Thursday: Work out/physical activity, big session.
Friday: work out, maybe golf afterwards.

All of this must be done while maintaining a perfectly clean diet. Really need a nice cleanse after the bender this week and it's time to get stuff rolling. Year is over 50% done and I still have so many goals that need a lot of progress to be met. Meditation will also be at least once per day. No excuses.

Offer: To show my gratitude for the support and to give me some lab work I am offering to do a written hand history review for the first 2 posters to reply to this post.

GL with your goals man! Nothing wrong with posting in your thread to remind yourself of what you need to hold yourself accountable of. This thread is a nice convenience for reviewing each goal/routine you set.

Enjoyed reading your Sunday post as well, always eye-opening to read your rants.

Loving this thread. I enjoy your tangents sir

@ trent: thanks d00d i appreciate that
@ colin piddle: i appreciate it thanks!

@both: not sure if you read last part of post but you 2 were the first 2 posters and if you want we can swap a hand history for reviewaments let me know if u are interested

Haha didn't see that. Is it cool if I have you do a written review of a friend's HH instead? I feel it would be greater value to someone else. If it is PM me your e-mail and I'll have him send a HH to you that way.

57s hand like your line
55 game is too easy obv
AQ i will sqz pre.... most likely if decide not to sqz for any reason(stats/dinamic etc) i will lead that turn decent % of time with my hand and evaluate, as played river is close i think villain can take that with almost any Tx and probably, every Jx because our hand from his point of view looks a lot as PP<T


Btw good and smart advice/direction u got from your session with the psychologist

sure.

cheers for your thoughts m8. i'll be getting to all that text on skype tonight

Usually don't like to post in here too much throughout the week as I like to keep it to 1-2 solid updates per week. That being said, I've been reading "The Subtle Art of Not Giving a ****", which is about not giving a **** about stupid stuff...so I'm gonna follow suit and you guessed it...NOT GIVE A ****.

First, I want to pat myself on the back for following all my self instructions for the first 2 days of this week. Got the reading underway, stayed awake through a 2 hour meditation session, got in 2 lengthy walks, a solid poker/review session, a workout, AND kept the diet clean. The bad news, a week is 7 days and I'm only on day 2.

WARNING: small to medium sized whine follows.

So after shipping the Monday 6m for 30k a few months ago the runbad realistically could not get much worse. Luckily, I've game selected pretty well and sold pieces responsibly, so monetarily it hasn't been too costly. I guess I'm partly stressed out from being on the road for 2 months and spending quite a bit of money in Calgary and Vegas and partly from just running like aids. I'm trying to bring my A game/study off the tables/tweak my game/improve/take days off etc it just feels like no matter what I do I'm finding myself on the poor side of all ins, running into coolers, running into tops of ranges, bluffs getting picked off, value bets getting folds, getting 3 bet when I open loose, getting folds when I open nuts etc etc...

Variance is obviously largely responsible for this as well as some personal factors: not bringing my A game 100% of the time, being distracted, mental game not on point...etc etc. This is obviously completely standard in poker and the guys who can keep plugging away and staying sharp through the tough times are the ones who will prevail in the long run.

I'd be lying if I said the disorientation in combination with not shipping a nice MTT for a few months wasn't starting to eat at me a little bit. I really hate losing the $ of the guys who invest in me every single session and I want to win just as badly for them as I do myself. After today's session I was quite frustrated and steamed so I decided to go for a long walk. Tried calling a friend in the first few minutes who didn't pick up, which was a little bit tilting because I really wanted to vent about a few things. I kept walking and this constant train of negative thought was barreling through my head. Here's a few things that were beginning to fester in my mind:
-With the general population improving rapidly and Amaya basically scrapping rakeback, how beatable is poker? Am I going to be able to keep making sufficient $ EV in online poker?
-Could my time be allotted to something with a higher ceiling? Would I enjoy that thing/lifestyle as much as I love the poker lifestyle?
-At some point I'm going to have to move on from poker, when is that time? What will I move into?
-The whole year my effort has been satisfactory in terms of gym/nutrition/dating.
-I've made quite a bit of improvement and had a little bit of success, but haven't had the level that I want yet.

I won't pester you with my looping sound track of negativity any longer.

If you recall that cemetery that I pass by on my nightly walks from a post a few months ago...I passed by that cemetery as per usual on my nightly walks and I brought that train of negativity to a halt. How many dreams went the way of the dodo in that cemetery? How many of them would take the chance to be alive and healthy again? Thinking about death and how lucky we are to be alive and healthy makes most of our problems seem microscopic in the grand scheme of life. I'm so thankful to have had the rungood in my poker career to have 2x ~170k scores, to have used this game to fund my living/education/condo for the last 6 years. I'm thankful for all of the great experiences and people I've met. Yeah, poker isn't as great as it used to be, I can't change that. However, I can bring my best self and eventually move out of this game. Looking at the situation objectively, the day that I retire isn't too far away...just need to figure out what else I can do. Real estate? Investment? Start a business? I'd love to talk with anyone who has suggestions.

Anyways, weirdly enough, right after I passed that cemetery the friend who I was trying to call returned my call. I wasn't nearly as steamed and we had a super good conversation which ended up lasting over an hour. Hanging up that call led me to this PGC to cement some of my thoughts and this good state I've got myself into.

Here's some hands from my session:

https://www.boomplayer.com/24463981_ED9EA91E41
seems like an easy b/f on the river right? I basically assume he is never worse than a full house here. Think I should maybe size bigger on turn but it prob doesnt matter too much.

https://www.boomplayer.com/24463776_71DFA0BB73
think this is really the only way i can play this vs a villain who has aggro tendencies? is it just me or does his river call seem sort of bad? Should he barrel turn (as he's repping over pairs and I prob have 0 flushes, and a lot of 1010 type stuff that might fold?)

https://www.boomplayer.com/24463715_F7E83D2E5C
wp genius. i think my bluff is prob pretty good vs a lot of recs but clearly a DISASTER vs this guy

https://www.boomplayer.com/24462988_EB77C7F26B
weird hand, we shouldn't have a 4 bet range here pre right? villain was nitty and I actually think if I'm on my absolute A game I nit fold turn. So rare they show up with anything but AA here.


That's enough for tonight guys. Time to get some reading/meditation and then hit the hay. Ultimate frisbee playoffs tomorrow so have to take the day off of poker. I'll try to condense these posts a little in the future and keep them to strictly Sundays. But who gives a **** right?

GN and GL

I don't think I've responded here, but I like your thoughts/posts and I think it's great how you are working on your mental game. Keep it up.

My opinions on the hands:
1) would play it 100% the same.
2) Yes you block flushes but I don't like giving the opponent a free card on the turn here, I would bet.
3) painful call, but I guess especially vs recs you can just x back turn and river since you have good sdv and many of them don't have a fold button.
4) either flatting or 4betting is fine. I think you have to always call flop + turn jam with KK, even nits can easily have TT+(/some full ****** hands sometimes) here.

GL and remember to HF

K9 - b/f unless V is good enough to turn AJ into a bluff here. Sizing smaller otr to like 3k as we don't have any bluffs here and want to induce calls from Ax pardon this is vs a fish/calling station.

AA - Playing the same way especially vs someone with aggro tendencies. Villain's river call is meh, you don't really have any bluffs here and vs a thinking player he should definitely shove turn.

AQ - This is a good bluff line vs anyone except a calling station

KK - Gross, sigh calling it off on the turn and playing the hand the same way. Pray he has queens, roll your eyes when he shows up with the obvious.

tyvm for your thoughts sir. i appreciate the kind words. trying to have fun and enjoy the journey


@ trent thanks ma man i agree with all


Just finished up the ultimate frisbee season. Was cool to meet some good people and go out for drinks after games etc whilst getting some intense physical activity. Believe me when I say that sport is far more difficult than it looks Grinding a heavy session tomorrow, friday off/possibly sat, then going ham Sunday to wrap up ths week. Leggo.

Will flick you through a hand history via pm at some stage

After yet another day of getting absolutely grossed out for an entire session I decided to make a few adjustments and guidelines for myself until I get my roll online healthy again (I don't like to deposit very much idk why):

1. It's clear the direction Amaya is taking PS and the new rakeback system is actually far worse than I originally figured. One way I'll have to adapt to this is playing volume on other sites. STARTING SUNDAY: I am going to go from playing 95% of my volume on PS to approximately 50%. The games are too tough there atm to justify grinding tonnes of low EV games w/ low rakeback. In my next 2 days off I will be attempting to get roll across party/888/possibly ACR/possibly some others.

2. Gonna have to have less % of myself than usual for a while until I start getting some binks under my belt. Will be looking to sell around 50-70% of most games for the near future.

3. Have a more strict grinding routine. Tues/Thurs/Sun will be heavy sessions with long hours and lots of tourneys loaded. Mon/Wed will be optional days and I will attempt to play small nightly schedule on at least one of those nights. Fridays/Saturdays will be mandatory days off.

4. Will try to grind a live cash session at least once per week on days off.

5. Might get on the crypto currencies bandwagon. Anyone have any advice?

6. Gonna cut out some of the higher stuff and bigger turbos/hypers.

Feels so ****ty atm to keep bricking/losing every session. Feels like I haven't won a relevant all in for weeks of grinding...but if it was easy...everyone would do it.

Book I'm reading atm actually talks how we need to take responsibility for everything that happens to us in life. For example if we get hit by a car it is natural to take on a victim mentality, to blame others, to feel sorry for ourselves, or to get depressed. The book says that of course getting hit by a car would suck, but we CHOOSE how we react to the situation and deal with it. It doesn't do us any good to mope and feel sorry for ourselves etc...So I can sit here and whine about how bad I run and the state of the games/how Amaya is screwing us and feel sorry for myself OR I can do what I have in my power to maximize my EV and keep my mindset on point. I'll choose the latter. Following that is the hard part.

Watched a webinar with apestyles today and he was talking about how most poker players make their money in downswings. There is quite a bit of truth to this statement (although not solely true ofc). Have to keep staying disciplined/game selecting well/stay mentally strong/focusing....following that is the hard part.

All of this sounds good, but don't underestimate how soft some of the bigger turbos/hots are. As for investment advice? Buy low sell high

I think playing Tuesdays and Thursdays is a mistake unless you're playing the 1ks. Those days are a lot tougher

U opened EP and flatted a donk bet 3 way on the flop, a very small donk bet. What hands are in your flop flatting range that start betting the turn for value when checked to? Probably none(QQ, JJ, and A 10 start to become candidates, all three would be hard to bet T and R without some sick exploits reads), it was a pretty easy call down. As for the flop donk bet
Flop donk bets are always weak. Small flop raise works lovely here and AQ with blockers and backdoor and little SD value makes a great candidate. easy to say as I watch the hand unfold obv

Crypto bandwagon sounds stupid. Sounds like a desperation move(been there before and was not long ago). Before I bought in though I was honest with myself. Why? I do think a decentralized currency sounds cool but other than that I do not know squat and it sounds like you do not either. I have watched the price go up and up on the various coins but what do I know? it could come crashing down. I think in any investment, like poker, you need sound reasoning for entry, for picking your spot. Do you have a good reason to buy cryptos or do you only have $$ signs in your eyes because it's been opportunistic in the short past? I wish I had a better understanding and maybe I should strive for that, but in the end, for now, I can't just jump in because it's the hot topic, those have fallen before.

pmed you again

I think Tuesdays are likely the toughest day of the week. That being said the mini ST and late ST are sooo good but yeah every reg plays those days. Agree those days are heavier concentration of regs. A nice contrarian play could be grinding Mon/Wed/Fri/Sat/Sun instead which is actually worth considering

Which hands are in my call range on the flop that bet turn? 55 1010 KK K10 KQ AK some AA QJ some AQ some AJ...i raise all flush draws on flop. things get dicey because of the 20bb stack who acts after me i would hate to raise this type of hand for that reason...i would also trap a lot of my range prob. Maybe I actually don't have a value flatting range on the flop but I was taking an exploitative line vs a window licker. So felt his donk lead was weak and I could make him fold this exact type of hand and I was clearly wrong about that

I wouldn't go as far as saying crypto sounds stupid. The only thing that would be stupid is to be closed minded and ignore to consider the fact that there is some earning potential in crypto. I agree it's almost never wise to hop on investment bandwagons without research or to "build castles in the air" but I definitely want to talk to some people about this and consider some investment. Thanks for your post!

haha thanks m8