jesus man, your parents seem like total *******s, especially your dad. that sucks, sorry you have to deal with that. i can feel my blood pressure rising talking to my dad about politics sometimes, but it's nothing compared to what you're probably going through.

Can’t imagine how hard it must be to deal with that, I’m sorry.

They are just completely ignorant and it’s so hard to deal with people like that, you can’t reason with them or get them to change their dumb opinions (because, of course, people dense enough to hold those opinions in the first place arent going to be open minded to new ideas).

My mom is somewhat ignorant too, she is a born-again Christian and even voted for Trump, I can’t believe there are women who actually vote for him, ha. As a result I do not ever talk about anything political, religioun, societal stuff, it’s all just off the table. I know it’s nothing like what you deal with, but I know to a much lesser extent how maddening it can be.

The one thing that helps me have sympathy for my mom, though, is she is just not that smart, and I feel bad for her because of that. On top of it, she didn’t have parents teaching her better ways to think, either.

I think in your shoes their views on your sexuality is what makes me want to say, good for you for cutting them out of your life, family or no. If they don’t believe you’re entitled to the same basic rights because of your sexuality/race/whatever, I just don’t want people in my life either who think that way, family or not, and I would do the exact same thing.

Anyways glad poker is going well. Cheers bud

Yeah it's not easy. And def not good for the blood pressure lolll

Hey Oladipo, always super happy to see you post itt (or any thread tbh, really enjoy your insight). Thanks!

The thing is, I try not to bring up anything political or religious but they loooove to bring up little needles all the time to try and get something going. If I do go that route I have to ignore a dozen "jokes" about dumb liberals or lazy blacks etc. So not super viable, but maybe in the future it could be a stop-gap if they could agree to it

And sometimes I do feel bad for them, because ultimately it's not a healthy way for them to live either, but they are very intelligent people (my dad is a partner in a large law firm in san francisco) so an inability to understand is no excuse.

Anyway, appreciate the post. Keep kicking ass, you're a pretty inspiring guy

Good on you to be able to cut out the cancers in your life. It's definitely not an easy thing to do when it's your parents. Many are never able to do it.

It's interesting how people that are intelligent in certain aspects of their lives can also be so ignorant and compartmentalize some ridiculous beliefs.

Yeah beating your kids seems like lazy parenting to me. As a kid who got his share of beatings I can say it did absolutely did not do anything positive for me. I still resent my parents to this day for that and haven't seen them in 20yrs. Before corona hit I was planning on visiting them for this summer because I have a newborn and they are getting to the end of their years so thought maybe to bury the hatchet, but a lot of years lost that could've went way differently.

thanks, it's definitely not easy. especially with the constant guilt tripping and gaslighting. My dad tries to say things like he's the only one who's ever been there for me so how could I be upset over a difference in "political opinions"...

for one, it's not a difference in political opinion to be opposed to civil rights. and I don't even get into this with him because he won't listen, but when I think of people who have been there for me when I needed help he's not at the top of the list. kinda hard to be there emotionally for your gay son when you consistently vote against his rights or kick him out of the house at 17 for trying a joint. but I digress...

It's tough, but I know he's incapable of listening to me so I can't keep wasting so much energy trying. I'm not one to have a fake surface-level relationship just to maintain some form of contact so I just won't be making any effort to stay in touch.

----

Been a really difficult month tbh. Wish I could be in san francisco protesting. My friends have been keeping me up to date... it's really bad. The police just keep escalating the situation and attacking peaceful protesters, bystanders, the media, people just trying to get groceries... it's getting more and more out of control and it's very concerning. The police seem to think if they can just beat and tear gas enough people they can end the protests against police brutality...

Poker has been tough to get volume in because I can't play in an agitated emotional state, which lately feels like 24/7 tbh. It's tough because to perform at a high level I kind of have to block out everything else that's going on while I play, which is a lot easier if I just isolate myself from talking to my friends or reading news coverage. But obviously it isn't reasonable or healthy to just ignore atrocities happening to my friends and my community... finding the right balance is difficult because it's not as easy as finishing an article or a conversation and then moving on to work - this is emotionally difficult **** to be dealing with and processing it can take a long time. So I've definitely had days where I just couldn't play, or I tried and quit after an hour or two because the focus just isn't there.

But roughly halfway through the month I'm at 23k hands played (all 200nl) and $5800 profit, so all in all it hasn't been a bad month so far. Just feel like I could easily have 35k hands played by now if I had the ability to control my emotional state at all times. Not that I think it's possible or practical to be able to control my emotional state 100% of the time, but I could definitely work on it.

Getting back into a regular exercise routine will be a huge help - can always feel a huge difference mentally and physically when I work out regularly. Because most of my exercise always came from hiking, trail-running and running on the beach I've been really sedentary since quarantine started (though I have a sit/stand desk and haven't sat to play poker in months, so at least when I'm working I'm standing and tend to be moving around when I have lulls between hands). Have tried doing some cardio workouts at home and it's just such a boring grind that I can't get into a routine, but I'm going to make a stronger effort with it this time and see if I can get it to stick.

Yeah that's the problem right there. Who you are as a person he considers as a political opinion of which he thinks you could change if you wanted to.

This years been pretty eventful that's for sure. Hang in there man.

Sorry to hear about your situation with your parents, sounds pretty rough. Just wanted to say kudos to you for breaking out of their ignorant views of the world and finding your own feet and your own perspective.

Id imagine many people who have parents as ignorant as what your parents sound like just simply fall into a similar way of thinking, so I think you should be proud of yourself for finding your own way to think about the world. From what it sounds like its 110% the best decision for you to distance yourself from them. Obviously easier said than done though.

Best of luck in the future, enjoy lurking your thread!

Part of what complicates the whole situation is that he says that he supports gay rights and that he doesn't think it's wrong to be gay anymore. But, I don't think he actually feels that way considering that he's never been able to ask me how my boyfriend is doing in past relationships or in this one. (he says friend or "special friend", he can't say the word boyfriend or actually have a conversation beyond me saying things are good - if I try to bring up something like a recent trip we took together he doesn't ask how it was or what we did or anything, just moves on to talking about his life)

Add to that the fact that he supported Prop 8 to ban gay marriage and can't seem to acknowledge it or have an adult conversation about it, and the fact that he always supports conservative legislation to restrict gay rights under the guise of "free markets". He also doesn't care that his favorite politicians support things like forced conversion therapy, where children are kidnapped (with parental permission) and taken to camps where they receive mental and physical abuse (electric shock therapy is legal in many states and also torture) until they promise they won't be gay anymore. Just doesn't care, can't be bothered to have a conversation about it.

And then all of the casual racism while he's out in public (like calling people turban heads, complaining about how it's racist he can't say the 'n' word) makes him embarrassing to even be around. He thinks it's just humor and if you don't laugh you're being an sjw. The fox news talking points are brutal to listen to and somehow he doesn't see the racism in saying that black people are bad parents and dependent on his tax $ and if only they stopped giving black people so much welfare they wouldn't have so many problems...

so yeah, definitely not the type of person I want to spend much time associating with. he's also the needling type where if I'm around him within an hour there is always a "joke" about gay people or black people to try to get something going. I've tried for ~12 years to get him to come around and he's only gotten more and more entrenched in far-right extremism... really sad to see especially because even though he wasn't always around as much as I would have liked or couldn't support me in the ways I needed I do have some good memories with him, and at the end of the day he's my dad so I'll always love/care about him. makes it that much harder to not talk or see each other despite knowing it's for the best

thanks man. def easier said than done because I've said it plenty of times haha

It's funny how many people have prejudice against weed when they do things that are 1000x worse, like painkillers, sleeping pills, cigs and alcohol. I know one person that talks **** about weed all day but takes a mix of black stripe antidepressants with whisky at a regular basis lol.

It's really good the recent awareness that is rising, what boggles me the most is why there are still racists and homophobic people and how big they are in % of the population. We have internet, cell phones are accessible and people can read everything about what they want, access tons of free papers through google scholar and still muppets like Trump get elected.

Imo the only explanation is that these people have so much hate and trauma inside them and live such miserable lifes that having those illogical prejudices are like a escape valve for them. The other theory I have is that some people get trapped within their social circle and since everyone they know voted for Trump, they are afraid to break through and end up accepting these ideas just to make their friends happy.

In my country the president got elected by using hate speech and he is racist and homophobic (a lot of people voted for him EXACTLY because of that btw). Some protests in favor for KKK just happened in here and people got arrested for that, so many people are trying to defend these white supremacists saying it's a political arrest, it's so ****ed up.

As a white guy I can testify that the treatment black people get in the streets by the police is way different, the stories my black friends tell me look like things that would happen during the 1800s.

Very often I walk around on the streets/parks with a joint in rich areas of the city(which are heavily policed, while the poor part of the city has murders comparable to warzone areas), never got searched. I know a policeman and he said once that "the only time of the year that the police is allowed to beat white people is during the carnaval".

Pretty much half the time I go out I see people getting searched by the police, most of them aren't white. I've read one story of a brazilian poker player(saulocosta10 from RIO, I think) and he said he was driving his mom's expensive car and the police stopped him because they thought the car was stolen WTF, imagine having to explain that.

It really is crazy how far being white goes when it comes to the police. I've been pulled over while smoking weed at least 3 times that I can remember and never got more than a "hey you really shouldn't be smoking and driving" *wink* *wink*. I remember in Compton I got pulled over at like 2am on my way home from the casino puffing a fat blunt and the cop just busted up laughing when he got to my window. told me he could smell me before he got out of his cruiser. then said I need to fix my headlight and to have a good night. didn't even check my id or registration.

can get away with almost anything with white skin and a little luck. and if you get caught at least you get some burger king before they take you in. if you aren't white well count yourself lucky if you make it to jail

Meanwhile I have a friend being charged with a DUI for blowing a 0.09 and another who got his car torn apart in a search by the police just because he was smoking a joint outside of his car nearby (legally smoking weed, in california). guess if they're white

This stuff is insane. Parents should be jailed for this.

Yeah I agree :/

Played a $50/30k mtt on monday and binked for $6000. Played the same tourney yesterday and took 3rd for $2900. Was down to the final 3 tables today and got bored so I decided to check out the high stakes action. Just to watch, ya know? Well there was a $25/$50 running and this German was open limping every other hand on a $3k stack. Then I see that he wasn't even the whale. Some Israeli was limp/calling trash like A2o and calling 3 streets on 332JQ...

So naturally I had to join the wait list, which somehow I was the 1st one on. I figured if either fish left I wouldn't play. I mean, how likely is it that a reg gives up a seat on 5knl table with 2 huge fish?

Literally 20 seconds later a reg dips out and I'm seated. After a few uneventful orbits I get dealt AA in the sb and it folds around to a reg otb. He opens to $125, I 3bet to $525, call. Flop comes T98hhd. Check, V bets 1/4 pot. Call. Turn 8x. Check, V bets 2/3 pot. $4k in the middle, ~$3k behind. River comes... Ace. I check and praaaaaaay. V tank shoves, Hero snaps and V shows 54ss for the 0eq triple suicide. Hero scoops a $10k pot and rides off into the sunset

Awesome run! Great to take a shot and have some run good.

LOL I 100% believed the story. Shouldn't have hit us w/ the jk at the end

Sick

Hard works pays off! Grats!

100% true story lol. Though I realized reading it back that it read like a 6bet post haha. Been a degenish week

Lost ~4k playing 1knl the last few days. No MTT ft's except I took 1st in a really small $50 for ~$1050.

Super excited for today though. I satellited into an $800/$1million for $80. Barely made day 2 with ~15 bb, but in the first 30 minutes of day 2 I've spun it up to 70+ bb and in ~10/200 left, $161,000 up top. just taking it 1 hand at a time and playing my game.

Que pobrecito!

Seriously though good luck today, hope you win big! And grats on the recent scores.

I'm lmao at how tilted this comment probably makes all the people who actually study/work hard XD thank you though

it definitely is. thanks man

thanks rick!

ITM for ~$1800 now, in 5/152. Time to take this ****er down

Nice job lately, tgig. gl in the mtt!

thanks iso

managed to punt my stack and take 50th for $2700 :/

was 12/50 with 40bb and opened A5ss otb 2.1x, bb called. Flop 632ssx which is a pretty easy flop check back for me. So I bet 1/3, BB calls. Turn Kx, bet 2/3, BB calls. River Qx, I put him all in for just under pot, BB uses entire time bank to call K5o.

Pretty awful hand by me. I'm sure I get a decent amount of folds otr but there's plenty of better hands to barrel. this has to be one of the worst if not the worst, and it plays much better as a flop check anyway imo so the whole hand went off the rails there.

Had ~8bb after that, won a couple shoves uncontested before busting K4s 9bb co vs BB waking up with KK

can't really be upset about spinning $80 into almost $3k playing a donkament but if I just play that hand better I generally end up around 30bb, which was about avg stack with only 50 left. disappointed

Turning $80 to $2,700 is nothing to frown at. Nice job man.

thanks, def right about that

June Results

Didn't play stars or ignition this month, just hudless sites.

200nl

28,470 hands
+34.5 bi/+$6900

1knl/5knl

some small number of hands
-$2400

Total Cash: +$4500

MTT's

96 mtt's
~$75 abi
4 final tables: 2 first place, 1 third place, 1 fifth

+$7987

June Total Profit: $12,487


Quick June rundown: Personal issues with racist family, boyfriend's best friend died from covid, played garbage volume and made bad choices like sitting 5knl with a $45k bankroll. snapped out of it before I did any damage, luckily. and I can't complain about 3 straight months at 5 figs, even though I didn't really deserve it this month

Just finished first July session. 1300 hands, +11 bi. The never ending heater continues: last 200k hands my wr is 12bb/100

Had a fun hand a couple weeks back. some rec who I play a lot with every day limp/called in ep, we go HU to a J53r flop with QTs. I bet 1/3 rec clicks it back something like 4x and I call with bd everything. Turn is a blank 5, check check. River is an 8, rec bets 2/3 and I legit snap, rec flips 76o as expected

I poker goal for this month is no degenning at 1knl+ and minimum 50k hands @ 200nl. might do a giveaway to get myself off my lazy ass but if I need a giveaway to play 50k hands/month when I'm crushing so hard I should really give up

Congratulations on a solid month! May July bring you another 5 figs.