Hey guys, my name is John and i am a self confessed tilter

I made a PGC thread here where i was going to try and beat micro's and blog about it... http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/17...hread-1401884/

Here are my results for the hands i have played since mid Dec at mostly 10 and 25NL:




You can see in the graph two pretty large downswings near the start/middle (first one at 10NL so looks smaller but similar in BB's), i lost at least 30 buyins during these due to tilt (just scanned through the top big pots lost and counted 1000bb's in spew in the first 5 hands lol) There are defo a bunch more 100bb pots i spewed off aswell, so must be well over 30 buyins lost through tilt.

This is a huge problem for me. My brain literally stops working, i start clicking buttons really fast, all the range / equity work i have done is forgotten, fold button disappears, big bluffs are the norm:



It effects me away from the table also and i feel pissed off when i play so dumb. If it continues i will never be able to move up to higher levels in the game, so i am focusing this thread 100% on my mental game issues. To do this i will be using "The Mental Game of Poker" book by Jared Tendler to address the issues i have, and also some hypnosis, pregame warmup and meditation techniques. I will document my findings here with a daily journal.

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A bit about me, i have a job in the UK as a driver but its mostly summer work with tourism and airport transfers for my friends company. I am 31 yrs old and live by the sea in Cornwall UK. Here's a pic of me falling off my surfboard so you can put a face to the name:



About 2.5 years ago i got a bad leg injury / strain an was diagnosed with a hip problem which after many different medical opinions turned out to be my hip bone was mis shaped causing cartildge wear and the onset of osteoarthritis - the side effect was severe pain for around 3-4 days out of every 14, unable to bend my leg walk anywhere, or even sleep due the pain.

Eventually i had an operation on the NHS (keyhole surgery hip dislocation ouch!) with long rehab but the op didn't work at all, turns out it was actually never a good option for me an a waste of time!

I was pretty down about losing my favourite activities of surfing, skateboarding and snowboarding. After 2 years of limited full time mobility i had put on a bit of extra timber. I was told i would need a full hip replacement at the tender age of 31 and would never surf again!

This shocked me but as with anything related to the human body there is always someone with a different opinion - i was pretty sure that couldn't be the only answer to this problem and managed to research and find a renowned specialist who took me on. Anyway long story short he found an alternative treatment that is somewhat hit or miss and only works for 1 in 5 people, but i was one of the lucky ones and its worked amazingly well for me and transformed my life. I am now free from pain 98% of the time and fully able to surf, i haven't skated since though since its a lot more physically harsh.

With that in mind one of my goals this year is to get really fit and shred any extra pounds i have right now.

So i am calling myself out in this thread and holding myself accountable!
My current weight is 103KG and i am 6'1"
My goal is to reach 88KG by June.

With that in mind i am implementing a new diet containing lots of good fresh food, daily juicing (mostly vegetable) and gym sessions, high intensity interval light weights and rowing / cycing for added cardio. Will update progress itt.

Other subgoals are reach 100NL by the end of the year and get SuperNova on PokerStars.

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Cliffs of goals for 2014:

* Control / manage / beat tilt.

* Lose 15KG by June, get fit.

* Reach 100NL

* Supernova on Stars




Thanks for following and PLEASE post hand opinions i really wanna discuss some poker with other micro grinders, GL everybody




忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び 忍び

Forgot threadsavers...

gl bro crush the tilt

So each day i will give myself a score out of 10 in a few different area's to track my progress through up and down swings so here's todays:


Rungood 7/10

Guess this will somewhat detemine how the rest will go early on, but hopefully later i will run bad and play great if everything goes to plan.
Kinda card dead this morning. But games were siiickkkk tonight Good seats on some great tables (see below) played my A-game for the vast majority. Not the greatest of number of strong hands though but the ones i did get held up. Have moved down to grind some 10NL a couple days to regroup after i slipped in terms of focus recently.

Preparation 7/10
Pregame warmup was great today. I followed my plan and made sure i did 10 mins of pre game meditation before each session. I felt really solid for nearly the whole day. I didn't write down and analyse any area's i was planning on working on though so tomorrow i will try and focus on some C-game leaks.

Tilt / emotional control 6/10
The best it has been in a long time, but still some mistakes i made two kinda spewy mistakes. These were not much in terms of bb's but the lack of thought and autopiloting was the real shame for me. One spot i limped bvb then CC'd 3 barrels vs an agro fish with second pair, which is probs not too bad but the lack of thought between turn and river decisions wwas awful no doubt. Then i reacted by floating two small donks with a gs on AKTXX board and raised the riv small donk large versus a whale. Both avoidable errors that reallly need to be ironed out. I insta quit and regrouped so that was good.

Sick games on the deep tables tonight, various 95 vpip peple sat everywhere felt like 2003 (except divide the buyin by a thousand ) Felt like the best games i played in ever so imagined it being a Carlsberg beer advert:




Results from today:



+ 10 buyins which was sweeet, no illusions though the really work has to be done pregame and then executed in game to prevent further spew sessions during those really tough periods. Thats all for now GL everyone

GL, nice session

glgl good start to the thread

Donkament day today, managed to sneak a few cashes, made a huge blunder with AK for my tourney life in the 5.50 though here:


Finished like 200th or something in that one.

Then was down to 5bb's early in the Bigger$22 but kept it together and ended up finishing around 100th out of 9K entrants, pretty happy with that, lost a flip to bust out of that one so standard i guess. Tourney results for the day:



And some 10NL zoom to numb the pain of how dull and nitty MTTs are when your card dead and hanging on for dear life:



Reason for the huge boost today, one time



So yeah today was good but as always with donkaments, what could have been haha. Can't complain though, made some sheets today so am happy. Overall MTTs are frustrating to me, was grinding with friends around and watching dexter aswell so no meditation and stuff today, back on the mental game assault tomorrow.

Gl everyone

GL with the tilt, i need some in that department to

yeah its one of those things thats gotta be dealt with. gotta work on that daily to really get it sorted out.

Today had freinds over allday pretty much, but weather was really bad so decided to play some more MTTs on a laptop and hang out with them while they sessioned our new huge 3D TV that my friend recently brought. Turns out the thing is sweet for video gaming (would like to get my comp linked up so i could grind on it so hopefully get that sorted soon.)

Anyway played 18 tourneys but only cashed in a few satalittes (although one was a 3$ sat into 62$ tourney iirc so that was cool to win that) - actually spent about 50ish $ total in buyins today with all the sat wins and stuff, ran pretty bad didn't win a flip all day when it mattered and everyone snap folded when i had AA or KK. Girafee:



Standard donkament hands:




Misclick raise pre fml


Also played some cash 25NL zoom and a few deep ante tables while i was waiting to busto the MTTs which went a little better, back on the cash grind tomo looking forward to some focused deeper stack play already, donkaments suck when you meh haha

Today played a few K hands of cash and some more tournies. I played really good in the cash games, but i am getting totally destroyed in very single MTT i play. Not sure they're a good mix although finished donkament day 50K under EV lol. Didn't win a single flip hardly, although a fair few i questioned whether or not i should be even in a flip situation. Hopefully getting a fellow 2+2 er to discuss some tourney strategy with soon bc i currently getting owned haha.

Results:

Tournies today:


Hmmm...


Cash today:




Cash this month over 1K won without rakeback and stuff, obv running good atm though


Rungood 6/10
Cash games was average to good. Tournaments was a car crash though, lost very all in i was involved in.

Preparation 5/10
Pregame warmup was okay today. Didn't get as deeply calm as i was the day before yesterday and it showed in my play. Goin to really try hard for no distractions tomorrow, like today i left my phone on the desk and checked the net during play. Gonna silence my phone and hide it tomo, and no browsers open.

Tilt / emotional control 5/10
Some mistakes today that were pretty bad. Lack of thinking during large pots mainly. Below i have outlined my plan to improve. Making 3Bs bc i am deep on the regular tables then calling 4Bs with a suited range thats playable versus a range with bluffs in, but no good vs a fish with KK+ Lack of disipline mainly, disappointed with that.

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So today began making a comprehensive C-Game leaks list, here is what i have so far, below each leak is in Red followed my planned fix in Blue:

Not taking my time in big pots.

Need to slow down, take a breath and consider the following:

* Player type / tendencies

* Whats their range? Are they aware of my range (kinda merges with player type)

* How likely are they to bluff here on this texture / sized pot ?

* What does their bet sizing mean ?

Not checking stats enough to make better decisions

Ties in with taking my time, thinking more during play. Need to slow down and make more calculated decisions.

3Bin just bc i am deep and calling 4Bs with a suited range that plays well postflop, but not against a KK+ range vs a nit.

Ties in with using stats more, waiting for samples to accumulate and reads to be made.

Spewing off vs shorties with very high 3B %

Player solider range vs range, be a bit more paitent, don't let my natural hate for them ruining the games effect my play

Opening too loose after a big pot is lost

Simple fix is be more disiplined. Being aware of the problem makes me want to address and fix it asap. Certainly contribues to those big losing sessions where i donate stacks.

Floating flops a little too light when losing.

Need to be more focused on my CR EV and flopzilla work and stop chasing loses with overly ambitious floats

3 Betting too light when losing and i have a bad image

Need to air a little more on the side of solid less agro when i have a somewhat spewy image

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Will work hard on those tomorrow. Thats all for now good luck everyone hope you run better than me in the TCOOP

Good and bad day today - didn't attack the tilt goals as full on as i wanted to bc got distracted again playing donkaments - these things are pretty addictive and i like a challenge but they're holding me back in terms of cash game. On a positive note i got some great advice from another 2+2er on what tournies i am most +EV in so no more turbo's from now on. Thanks a lot for all the great advice btw :~)

On a positive note had another great sesh down the gym tonight, cycled 2 miles to get there, did a free weight interval session (those things are killer) plus 2KM on the rowing machine then cycled back, feeling stronger every day its nice. That i think 7 sessions in last 9 days gotta keep at it. Still haven't weighed myself but will get that done before the end of the month, not expecting much tbh as its early days still.
Also looking like some surf heading my way tomorrow which is a welcome change after weeks of bad winds. Best way to exercise for sure

So yeah cash results from today, mostly zoom some deep ante but not really super focused, made a few mistake for sure:



Hands:

versus SB whale with zero % fold to 3B and spewy reg who loves a 4B, thought calling would be okay here. OTT had read reg would bet his draws so went for the CR, when i saw his hand was a bit surprised to say the3 least:





Kinda gross spot otr vs fish:


Thats all more tomo no doubt

Not much poker today, just few hundred hands this morning lost a buyin at 10NL, then spent the day surfing was really nice waves today, logged 5 hours water time and just drank fruit/ veg juice between surfs, getting on the full health tip now :@)

Hope to get some in water video of me surfing soon when i get my new board / camera mount sorted out, in the mean time heres a pic taken by a local photographer yesterday:

So January is in the bag, played ok but am excited about all the stuff i need to fix, sooo much work to be done. Here's results of January:




Overall i would say the month was a mix of good play and spew, such a wide range in my play its crazy - need to work hard on elimating my C-Game.

Goals for Feburary:

* Prepare for 15 mins before each session. Eliminate C-Game

review C-Game leaks and use medatation techniques to calm myself and prepare properly for tough spots (i find if i don't do this then around every one in ten sessions variance takes me by surprise early and i react badly / spew)


* Play 80K hands at 25NL+ max 8 tables

* Play 30 MTTs

not good enough at MTTs to mix them with cash yet so either one or the other for now

* 16+ Gym sessions

* Daily juices and clean fresh food diet (nothing processed) continued

Thanks everyone for following and GL for Feb

Hi Ninja,

Would you mind expanding on your pre game warm up.

I sometimes just sit down and start playing, and this leads many times to lack of focus and spewy plays.

All the best for the challenge.

Sent from my LT15i using 2+2 Forums

Hey Ninja this thread is hotting up and I think you have a great shot of ascending the stakes.
I also like how you have your big passion outside of poker and it definitely seems to be giving you focus and balance and adding value to both your life and your work simultaneously. It is inspiring me to search for new interests and to stop being such an autist!

Yeah sure - well i firstly have all my poker notes organised in this awesome program called Microsoft one Note, i pirated it off a torrent site but am considering actaully buying it as its so good!

Firstly it syncs your notebook online so you can access it from any computer / smart phone (although need to test my pirate version out for that !) The program is super intuitive in the way it allows you to insert screen shots off anything into a doc file - resize the, draw all over them, what ever you want really - here's an example of a page from it:



Anyway in that notebook i have a mental game notes which i constantly add leak/improvement thoughts too. before i play i review these and try and pick a few out to focus on.

Then i get myself all logged into Stars and HEM ready, water o the desk so everything is prepped. I then listen to a 10 minute pregame warm up MP3 that i purchased from Elliot Roe who advertises in the coaching forum. This has really improved my mental game since i began using it, i am still not finished yet and have a long way to go but the improvements are noticable. I can find tough folds early in a session where as previously i would tilt call and then let it snowball into lots of bad decisions. i also use the 10 mins to visualise a few spots that found really tough and the though process i went through away from the table to find the best decision.

So thats it basically - working ok for me although i need to really focus on it to not allow lazyness and take it for granted to creep back in.

Thanks Tom, appreciated. Yeah i find that spending all my time in front of the computer makes me a worse poker player, i need balance, there's very few people like nanonoko who can just grind 15 hr days and play their A-game huge % of the time. I am defo not one of those people!

I found that out the last few days, i have been struggling hard to "bink" an MTT to try and pay for a few life essentails (car / surfboard) - its ended up being a really bad way of approaching the goal. I basically broken even / down 30$ over 42 tournies, i have decided to self exclude myself (ty Stars) from playing any MTTs for now, maybe i will lift that for the Sunday ones if i have nothing better to do but overall i need to re access my mental game in MTTs before i play a bunch of them again. I play too agro / loose an unfortyunately you can't reload like cash

As far as cash goes i have only played 1K hands this month so far up 3 buyins at 25NL - looks to re focus and smash out a bunch of hands ion next few days.

Something i would like to share with you guys is the crazy weather we have been getting in the UK this winter - there have been huge storms consistently hitting the coastline for moniths now, we have had two of the largest ones in ages in the last few weeks and another one coming tomorrow, check out some pictures !

End of the world **** near my house in Cornwall !!!


There's been some crazy large surf in Eurpoe, here's Andrew Cotton who lives about an hour from me on what people are calling one of the biggest waves ever ridden in Portugal a few days ago:




My favourote cliff jumping spot got destroyed by the sea

The view from up top:






Anyway GL at the table people, gonna go surf now and then hit the cash tables hard

Bro,can you tell as something more about that notebook etc?Can i find a crack for that etc?I need somthing like that,looks like really nice .

sure PM'd you a link

Thank you for the reply Ninja,

I am now reading a few threads where players are dealing with some form of titl. Skraper (another player) says it does a few push ups and squats before starting to get the blood flowing, which seems to help as well.

I would be happy to exchange some HH (tourneys) with you if you are interested.

GL

Thank you bro

no wozzas

yeah would be keen for sure although i am on a donkament ban atm - have self excluded m,yself from them so i can concentrate on cash only for a while - basically till i feel like playing them again, but will defo look to grind some of the sunday ones again soon i guess, so maybe then.

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So month has not really got goin at all tbh, i have been spending a lot of time with friends and surfing a bunch but not much in the way of poker - what i have played has been 6 tables of zoom which i am trying to intergrate to allow me to grind higher volume when i feel like it. Here's my results from that so far:



Obv volume is insignificant so looking to play 30K hands in the next 5 days if i can (small mini goal ) - also have dropped down to 10NL zoom till i learn the ropes of this speed poker a bit better.

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On a more fun note just wanted to say congrats to our snowboard winter olympic team, my friend Billy Morgan made the final of slopestyle but finished just outside the medals, and Jenny Jones then won our first ever winter olympic medal. Good job all you guys completely awesome to watch.


Jenny Jones

GL everyone more this week

So first day 6 tabling zoom - played 4 tables of 6max and 2 fullring, all 10NL. Think it went ok, i made a lot of mistakes with hotkeys and missing spots (esp missing notes on players after a showdown) - pretty sick i can cruise 1100 hands/hr My tilt control is really good since my new regime and i feel confident in my game. Managed 4hr13mins of 6tabling today which netted me 5K hands super happy with volume achieved, gonna try and get a 10K hand day this week if i can. Results from today plus a couple hands:


Shoulda folded this somewhere i think :/



Rungoot


Misclicked fired up a 25nl table and wona buyin


LoL10NL- turn donk was a misclik ...

Nice job man. What are your thoughts of zoom so far in comparison to regular tables?