could start dating too if you’re single

was reading the last few pages and it did seem like you might be needing some more balance, poker is really just a card game we make money off in the end

Broke up with my ex like 6 months ago and **** me if she didnt make life more difficult in every way. Think i am in a position where i need to work on myself, i dont like the idea of getting with someone when you are not a great spot and need to work on yourself. Still want to move abroad (wil def go to thailand for 3-6 months depending on whats possible) but would also like to relocate permanently to some more fun place thna the shithole i live in the shithole country sweden.

Genuinely i am just focused on myself and becoming what i want to be, achieving what i know i can etc. I agree i need balance but i think that can be achieved in many ways. I still also kind of dont want balance because i am passionate about what i do and i want to do great things. But i need to put my wellbeing first, or else whats the point of anything.

small sample size with the ex though, the right person for you will make your life easier, not more difficult

either way if you don’t feel ready yet it’s all good, it was just a suggestion for fulfillment outside of poker

For sure, totally agree it just leaves its marks to be in such a relationship. Feel no need at all to rush in to a new one haha

"One of the painful things of our time is that those who feel certainty are stupid, and those with any imagination and understanding are filled with doubt and indecision"

What is your opinion on bbz's content?

Dont have a opinion as i havent bought/seen much of of it at all. Seems very well liked, but that might me because every poker streamer/youtuber/anything is marketing it. So dont know really, assuming its alright.

#teamonlypostwinningsessions



In all seriousness i am not looking at my results overall until i clear the ds which im getting close to doing. Studying alot, trying to do some more coaching but big lack of interest there so far which is what it is. Have worked wtith a few people and feel good about what i have been able to to do help so far, ideally would want a cpl more people for a few reasons but i also dont want to push it too much, because i feel kind of guilt even though i believe i offer good value. But yeah, if anyone happens to be looking you know where to find me

Life wise in a prrety rough stretch, mentally some days are a disaster, but i am taking action in managable steps to improve upon the most important things.

Not much else to say really. Cant wait to move from this ****ing country, but options feel kind of limited in terms of regulations/being able to live there long term etc. Who knows what will happen, still undecided on that part.

Until next time,
Blommish

If you are willing to play midnight to morning hours there isnt a better place to live than Thailand imo

I love thailand, but i cant really live there long long term. Can stay 3 months, then leave come back for another 3 months. But cant do that forever. Is there any other ways to stay longer? I read a little about student visa...

They give student visa for 1 year and you can do extenstion 1 more year last time i read about it, you need to confirm about it because visa in Thailand is changing more often than people changing outfits

yeah, i think thats why ive been kind off not really considering thai even though i would ****ing love it. the 6 months i spent there really opened my eyes to how much i dont want to live in sweden at all, right now i feel like i want to leave this country and probably never move back.

within eu is so nice because u can just go there and settle in, but options really seem quite limited from my (limited) research

i guess there are agencies or w/e that can help with this stuff and what options there are to stay longer, i will look in to it because thailand would be ideal tbh, even if just for a year or 2. i hate traveling so much and the idea of leaving every 3 months to get another 3, and being unsure if u can do it again just makes it a big no-no. but yeah, ill look in to it for sure. staying here for a while more anyways.

within eu is so nice because u can just go there and settle in. but nice options seem pretty limited afaik, so much regulation and ****. gonna have to do some more research though for sure.

just saw i wrote the same thing twice, i couldve sworn it wasnt there

friendly reminder that jason derulo is fokin sick

Did you look into countries like Croatia, Montenegro, Romania and such? You can live pretty cheaply somewhere on the seaside, chill by the beach. Latin America is another option. Then there's also Georgia, Armenia...

Romania, georgia and armenia are definately not countries ive considered (or will consider most likely, feel free to sell me on them but first reaction is a big no no), croatia yeah, my entire family except ya boi were born in bosnia so i have some familiarity with that part of europe, Not that the limited experience i have with it has been very positive lol.. but im not really sure about at all yet, malta is viable but i lived there for a bit when i was like 20 and its a shithole imho.. Latin america comes with the same sort of visa issues as thailand i believe so its not really a long term option, although i have friends who spent the winter there this year and it seems v nice, but im looking more for atleast semi long term options (2years+). All im really feeling quite sure about right now is i want to gtfo sweden and probably not coming back. Where to is yet to be decided

Grinded, studied and now anxiety is just at peakkkkkkk level. Been real bad lately, is exhausting at this point. This song on repeat

I have no incentive to sell you on them, but they're pretty good options imho. Romania and Croatia obviously somewhat closer culturally and safer since it's EU. Georgia is amazing, also safe, great people and food, very beautiful. I highly recommend it and thinking about moving there myself for a while. They have a lot of Russians there now though (mostly anti-war), idk if that's good or bad overall, maybe good for dating purposes 😄, but same thing in Thailand.

I meant more that those countries arent really ones that i ever hear anyone discussing as potential relocation destinations, so since i am not very knowledgeable its pretty close-minded to just say no based on my somewhat baseless assumptions :P

I dont have a problems with russians, just the ones that support the war. Had a neighbour in thailand who came up to me and my friend waiting for our takeaway food and proudly introduced himself as russian first thing he says which i just still think is such a insane thing to proudly announce beore barely saying hi given the situation. Its easy to be pro-war in a luxury villa on koh samui though...

im struggling big time with some really basic excel issue, i have pio aggregates where frequencies are formatted as 97.421441421 instead of 97.4 or 97.4%, and despite trying everything i can find on google cant seem to fix it. Need to change its format in to 97.4 or 97.4% format as its supposed to be pasted in to another sheet where that is the pre-coded format, if anyone has basic excel knowledge and think they could help me fix this pleeeease do feel free to reach out.

Played a second winning session in a row today, made like 2k yday and 2.2 or something today. Not really looking at the month yet but guess i will post a monthly graph towards the end.


Anxiety levels are high atm, esp in the evenings. Cant really remember the last time i felt totally relaxed at night, really frustrating. Watching this one right now to try and inform myself a little bit more.

Cant seem to post it as a video, but heres a link:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K60u6ObDsrI&t=1873s

Email me the excel and I’ll fix it up.

<3 emailing now

Havent really played in a bit, will get to looking how last month ended. First session this one ended ****ing cleanly tho.

Also shout to this fella again. helped me a bunch with a sheet i was working on at the end of last year and also helped me fix some shitty formatting stuff i am clueless about just because he wanted to help recently. Feel like people like this (in my narrow world view anwyays) are fewer and fewer everyday, so just wanted to show some appreciation for all da excel ******edness youve helped me through!

Been doing some coaching and trying to build some longer term things because i do prefer working with a select few, starting to come together and offering some extra things like videos and **** because i still feel terrible charging people significant money to listen to my stupid ass talk, and then i think about carrot corner and just need to go to bed and realize i will just never relate to these fukers. Have maybe a spot or two open if anyone is interested, if not im kind of okay with what i got now and i think the overwehlming response has been positive which makes me glad. Will probably move from 90 min to a slightly cheaper hourly as typically its only rly necessary to do long sessions early on, just some stuff ive been thinking about. Grind is numero uno, and i really have no choice but get my **** together and start taking some leaps towards a life im okay with atleast.

Dont wanna sound too depressing lol, but its been a rough few months for me mentally. Lucky to have a backer/friend who goes above and beyond and just having someone who believes in u when you dont at all yourself is ****ing priceless, thats for sure. Really starting to see the people around me that i really have admiration and massive appreciation for, but still strugglign with stupid stuff like havnig a coaching session and afterwards just feeling like wht the **** did this guy pay for, im a ****ing rambling idiot. And then the other part rarely sees its the same And before some re tard comes in and comments on me thinking im a saint for trying to openly talk about how i feel and whats going on, **** off and dont even post. Ill keep trying to do what i think is right, and start getting this mental health, poker, social life package on the right track. I feel like ive had multiple people imply i think im some sort of saint which is hilarious because no one values me lower than me, ive had people tell me im a hater and this and that. Sure, maybe i focus too much on others, but how can i not when they are basically fleecing ****ing new people coming in to this game (already writing this sentence it pops in my head that carrot corner takes 250 pounds for a session and calls himself a top theoretician... it makes my blood boil. scammerrrrrrrrrrrrrr). I am torn because 1) i stand by what i believe but there is this 2nd part of focusing on too much other than myself, which is where alot of my problems lie i think. I have a really hard time valuing and prioritizing myself. Doesnt seem like something teres a quick fix for does it... Oh well, remember CARROT CORNER IS GARBAGE. It might not seem like it al the time but its all love at the end of the day. Be good yall