Been home now for about 9 hours and haven't slept so it's been like 36 hours being awake. What I did do though was to open pokers for some fish, probably shouldn't do that dead tired but felt like a narc addict.

Not many hands but a good result, got it easy this time and I'm happy with it.



When I went to Bournemouth I posted that I hope I could see water once I'm back but I think this suits me just well. Seeing some grass is definitely a signal from spring coming!



GN all!

Perfect mindset and A+ play today, graph:

Its Bar So btw

great stuff man. lifetime graph?

man i quit the pits and table games a few years ago and its such a stress relief. poker is the only thing!

Great read m8. Love the work and attitude you show. Really hope things work out for you.

Yeh started calling it Barcelona first when I heard and then I made up Barca and stuck with it. Wasn't sure of the true name at any point until I left bourne.


Maybe some day, feel uncomfortable posting it yet. Sorry.


But slots can be fun though!


Respect that, thanks!



Didn't play much today, felt a bit tired.

Hey all, I'm super tired so just a quick update!

Had the "perfect" day, I woke up around 4pm and got a call from my friend to go out and hang for a while, we went in a group of 4 and went to a place in city center where I hadn't been before. It was a billiard place with some nice games like Sega Rally, flipper and this where you have 4 color button and click them when color appears, I made something like 259 on that. Lot of fun and a great place to start out evenings when going to town, definitely will go there a lot from now on!

After the Sega Rally sessions I got anxious to get myself a nice car game set in my home, so after getting back home we did some googling and found this:

Didn't take too long before I bought 2 of these, so we can play it together with my friends.

Apparently I don't have enough room so I have to turn my guest room into a car gaming room and I already got it planned out. What I need is to get 2 tvs, 2 playstation 3, insert these playseats there and a nice sound system(will need to figure out how to make it work properly with 2 different tvs). Then I'm going to paint the walls black and set a playball on roof(not sure the exact word) to get some feeling.

After all this finally around 11.30pm I opened the pokers and been playing since, had some nice action and managed to hit best day for the month so far. Now it's 9.10am and think it's bedtime for me LOL!



Long day but definitely worth it! Feeeeeeeels so goooooddd!!!

I WANT MOOOAAARRRRRRRR!!

I just read OP's initial post. Does anyone else find it kinda disgusting that partypoker actually called him on the phone and egged him on to keep playing the casino?

can you explain why you are always over EV ? I am always under EV on Partypoker...

cl500 baller

I like your thread very much

good luck sir

Yeah that was kinda absurd but it worked. Hats off to them.

It's simple math, if someone runs under EV then another person has to run over it right!? No but to be more serious, you have to feel it. If you are ahead and your villain has gone all-in and you are feeling that he will suck you out, then you have to fold. This way you save both your money and EV. But on the other hand, if your villain has gone all-in and you have flush draw on turn and you need to call a lot and you don't have odds to call, but if you feel like the flush is coming, you have to call! Because on that moment it always comes!!

Feeling is everything man, trust your instincts! It's not only for bluffs/valuebets but it's also for sucking out and being saved from it. Sometimes you need to make -ev fold to lose less and -ev calls to win more.

Hope it helps!

Thanks, best of luck to you too!

too lazy to read it all right now, gonna do that for sure some day tho. OP is great, the graphs and baller car/trips look good too. glgl

probly been posted but whats exactly are you playing?

Best of luck to you too.

NL600-2000HU

Feeling addicted, in a good way this time. I had a rough day playing NL1k, started out well when I won 4 buyins from a bad reg but then later on I got a fish who ran his stack to 8 buyins, and was lucky enough to get all of that back. It's so rare to get it all back, usually you just keep dropping countless amount of buyins or they will run you. This time I was very fortunate neither of those two things happened.

Day:



Would want to continue but I think it's best to go sleep right now and wake up fresh tomorrow!

I'm deeply embarrassed to make this post but I feel like it's my responsibility proceed. I'm a completely moron idiot. All you are going to read is just plain foolishness and my own stupidity. Just cant help myself when I go outta control. Don't understand why.

Everything was good, my mindset was better than it's been for few weeks, I was finally starting to score some points for the month. I was highly motivated to play and couldn't even imagine in my worst dreams what was about to happen.

My day started like any other day of grinding. Just clicking buttons not much happening. When kicking off my 2nd session I decided to try entraction network with 30bb buy-in at NL2000. I bought in 600€, lost, then I bought in another 600€ and I lost. At this point there was no drama, everything was just like it should be. I buy in third time for 600€ and now I'm able to run it high. I finish the table with ~11000€ and my villain quits.

Then comes another reg and we start playing, I drop 4000€(4buyins) to him and I just go completely furious out of nowhere.(At this point I'm still up a great amount for the day) I snap quit him and join a regular to NL20000€ with minimum buy-in of 6000€. I managed to run my stack up to 10000€ before hit and running(ending up break-even between these 2 games). If I busted I would have reloaded the remainings of my ~18000€ entraction bankroll. This was the first time for over a half year I go that high to chase my losses(and I'm not even down for the day). I got lucky.

That is only the first part of the story, more is to come.

I felt really dumb and ******ed after all this. But I felt like I stepped over something that I haven't for so long. I really wanted to do something that I enjoy and I was in very dangerously mixed emotions at that point. Felt like there are no boundaries anymore. For that reason I thought of party casino, since I actually really had fun when I was addicted to it back in december. I decided to see if I'm still able to play it from the software(which they said they banned me before) and I was able to do so. I thought, hell, why not? Lets do it just for fun with 0.3€ bets and nothing more.

Everything was under control, I was looking possibilities hitting the clocks in melon madness for an hour now with 0.3€ spins. Then I thought, "I used to beat this machine, lets see if I can beat it now as well with varied bet sizings". I decided to make 7.5€ my max bet and start from 0.3€, increase my sizings when the clocks don't come in time. I had buy-in with 1000€ and that was my stoploss.

Of course, as you can assume it didn't work like that. After losing 1000€ I reload another 1000€, after losing that I reload another and another. I was already doing 30€/spin. After having bought in six times with 1000€ I decided to buy-in with 5000€ and increased my spin sizing to 150€. Well that didn't last very long and I reloaded 10000€ more and finally clicked the max bet of 450€ and started spinning with that.

After around ten spins I hit a big breakthrough. I hit clocks! I was like this is my moment, now please, ONE TIME, just please, ONE TIME!!! I decided to pick one from the left because I was picking the left one all the time. I hit something HUGE, my 2nd best all-time clock with 16 free spins and 8 times multiplier to max bet. This was my breakthrough. I'm almost guaranteed to get everything back, if I ran seriously bad I might not get it, but If I ran some under EV I might finish breaking even. But if I run hot, I can win all the way up to 200,000€-300,000€, I think my expectations are somewhere between 40,000€-70,000€.



I bend down to my knees, put my hands together in praying position, having the look of a dog when you are about to throw him a ball. I was repeating the old phrases "please...pleaseeee cmoooon.. CMOON!!!!... cmoooonn...one time... ONE TIME!!!111" ............I manage to win around 17000€ and instantly sitting out and leaving the game realizing of what might have just happen.

I wasn't angry that I didn't hit big time, I didn't think I deserve to hit, I'm just very fortunate to get at least something and get the money back that was very unlikely to be gone before these clocks.



I counted all the money together and I finished break-even with the poker tilt and casino hassle. I'm probably the luckiest person you can find, I had 55,000€ on my party account before started spinning and 24,000€ on my entraction account. I could have lost all that and been in a really bad shape.

All this for just 1000€ fun huh?. Need to remind myself of these happenings next time. I just hope... I just ****ing hope that I can. All of this came out of nowhere and could not have imagined anything like this to happen. I really need to figure out something for my issues and learn some more self control. I know everything, I realize everything, but I can't act to my knowledge. It's just bad when it all goes out of control. This is some really serious and dangerous stuff I need to find a way to deal with.

This time I was lucky, but if there will be next time I probably won't be. I just hope this was it for the last time of anything this kind of stuff to happen. But I know me, if it happened now, it can happen later too. Just hope not. At least I know I can't play these games for my own joy with smaller stakes so I just should not ***** touch them.

Hope I get smarter.

Does it help to not have that much money on the sites?

I know you deposited a ****load last time, but it might give you just an extra thought to help you.

Really sad to see you couldn't resist it, hope you seek help, and focus only on poker

Dont have money on sites with casinos imo

Come on man, your obviously very skilled at poker and playing is obviously very +EV. Why would you play casino games that are disastrously -EV?

Hire Jared tendler?

Gl with it man and good ur being honest.

You don't need a specialist, just hire a friend (or me) to slap you if they see you playing casino games.

Damn im very disapointed man, you shoudl seek help, dont want to go broke again.. living on the street sucks. I know this..

Pretty much this.

Found this thread today and just read the op and jumped right into the last page and when I saw your today's post I though "wow this dud must play only on exclusive poker sites."

Go to pokerstars or ftp when reopens. or contact the sites you play and ask them to ban you from casino games.

You gotta focus only on poker. If you lost €300k it's because you won it right?

Please do yourself a favor and go win more and leave the casino alone.

even when you breakeven, party should owe you money for allowing you to even play after banning you. They are gambling laws in most countries and they just broke them hardcore.