Hey guys, I've been a MTT player for most of my 10+ years of playing online. This is where I'll be reviewing key hands and venting after a bad session. I learned this from the Mental game of poker podcast. I find myself beating myself up over mistakes and thinking about them constantly, even before I sleep. This method is supposed to be the cure for letting them go and speeding up recovery times according to the podcast. I'm going to give it a shot.

I started out as a super nit playing only FR MTT's for the first 5+ years and have evolved into a LAG that 4 tables 6max cash. About 7 months ago, I went through the worst down-swing of my life. I went cashless in 70 or so MTT's, straight. I mostly played low-medium stakes MTT's and occasionally would play $109-$215's after some satellites.

After taking months off from grinding to review my HH's and identify leaks, I came to the conclusion that the first 1/3 of the streak was legitimately caused by a lot of tough breaks. As I dug deeper, I noticed many of the same misplayed spots over and over. I made a tally of all the mistakes broken down into multiple categories and have worked on them playing 10NL. It was supposed to be temporary but I found a lot more leaks than I expected. I now know the streak wasn't entirely due to bad luck, a lot of it was also bad plays and letting the streak affect my play as well.

I have rigorously been working on my game for the last 6-7 months via forums, study groups, Flopzilla study, joining a site to improve my game w/ videos and podcasts and books. I have given up pretty much everything to improve my game and eventually go pro.

A funny thing happened while I was working on my game at 10NL... I actually became super comfortable w/ 6max after a couple months of playing nothing but 6max. I used to dread 6max for many reasons including: having to play more hands, having to play more aggressive, having to pay the blinds sooner and getting dealt less hands per orbit (due to me just relying on patience and hand selection for so long), etc.

I am a BR nit b/c I have lost a couple 5K+ rolls due to various reasons like sports gambling, trusting my friend w/ my PW (lost it all in BJ in 2 hours behind my back), having my bro spew my account in 3 hours after he logged into my account after I fell asleep since my PW was stored and I lost a 6K+ roll pre-BF by playing way too high on FTP. At the time, I thought I was really good and looking back now, I was a joke. All I did was wait for the goods and get it in. A lot of times, I would just get run over by good players as I was terrible at hand reading and in a lot of areas in general.

Before my downswing, I withdrew 30% of my BR to invest in monitors, a recliner and some poker videos/material to have a legit poker setup and learning material. It got to a point where I was no longer enjoying poker and something had to be done. I still had a decent BR but the game was causing me mental and emotional anguish. That's when I started to break down my game and rebuild from the ground up.

Since then, I preferred to play w/ 200 buy-ins at 10NL than to play 25NL w/ less than 100 bullets. Since I now play a higher variance style than I used to for most of my days, I feel more comfortable w/ 200+ buy-ins than less than a 100 in 25NL. I would say in the last 12-18 months, I've really blossomed into a competent LAG. The last 6 months have been really important for me as I have solidified my 6max ranges and memorized stuff like break-even points for bluffing and calling bets and other math concepts. I've worked on my mental game and discipline as well.

I've also implemented a routine that I have stayed true to for 4+ months and counting that include meditation, running, weights, Flopzilla study, constant forum posting, reading, videos, podcasts, eating healthier, etc.

My goals are to eventually become a 2/5 reg at live poker and a multi-tabling 1/2 reg online. If all goes well, maybe even play 5/10 or higher and I'd also like to play some live MTT's as I know I have improved in nearly all facets of my game since I gave up MTT's about 7-8 months ago. I've had multiple setbacks in my career and most of it was my own fault in one way or another. I can admit that now and I am ready to progress w/ a lot less setbacks and move on.

I love this game, I am obsessed with improving everyday and I am taking my dedication for the game/to improve to a level I've never taken it before, mainly b/c I see the results I've been having since taking a break from MTT's to work on my game. I hope this thread will help me to improve and to capture my journey as I progress through the stakes and move up. I've always wanted to become a poker pro, mainly b/c I wanted to do something I love for a living. The money was always second. I'm just now starting to take the steps I need to improve on a daily basis after 10+ years of rolling out of bed to grind 10+ hours online.

Being a poker pro was the ONLY thing I ever wanted to be. It's what I want more than ANYTHING. I don't care that some might think it's just gambling for a living b/c to me, it's not. ATM, I'm 4 tabling 10NL for about 5-6 hours a day, depending on how many times I get disconnected from the servers. I'm currently working on resolving this issue so I can log about 1.3-1.5K hands daily for 5 days a week. I've just begun 4 tabling about a month ago after slowly adding a table as I plugged leaks. Hopefully I'll be able to see my progression as I continue to post to serve as inspiration when I look back and see the changes happen slowly over time.

I have always been a decent winner/break-even player since I started playing and that will change now that I put everything into improving on a daily basis. If I get some encouragement, that's a bonus. This is really to help me deal w/ my mistakes and letting go sooner but I'll take anything that comes with it. I know I'll reach my goals eventually, I just have to enjoy the process and this thread will help me get to that point sooner. Maybe we can help each other get to our goals in the process. Thanks for reading and I hope you achieve your goals as well.

-Daniel

Nice read man, sounds like you've got the ethic and dedication to get there! Good luck, and bookmarked.

Thank you sir! It took me a while to convert from someone that just wants to get better to someone that is doing everything in their power to improve.
GL to you as well.

Subbed GL, big like on mindset!

Good luck, seems like you're on the right track!

Thank you sir, GL to you too!

I appreciate it sir, GL to you too!

I was thinking as this journey progresses, I'll share more about myself here. I also think this would be a good place to post some poker/life related links to help us all get to where we want to be... whether it be financially, emotionally, psychologically or w/e.

So here's a good one that got me motivated like a m0fo...

https://medium.com/@benjaminhardy/ho...y-592c5b845b36

Here is another one I loved...

https://medium.com/key-lessons-from-...d80#.7bz46fshj

Last one... for now...
http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-epi...t-episode-445/

Hope this helps you guys, I know that after reading these a couple times... I knew the direction I had to take to get to where I wanted to be.

I want to post things like screenshots I took of good mottos/advice or SS's from slides I made, anything poker related that will keep me focused on what's important.

I was also thinking I'll post my results w/ hands played, session length, etc. here after every session. I already have a notepad I keep for records since PT4's records are completely off due to me using a card catcher. I also manually keep records in a notebook as a back-up. Guess it'd be pretty easy to copy and paste the data from there daily. I also keep records in my Poker Income app to keep track of stats like BB/100 and stuff. I have transferred all my data from PT4 to my Poker Income app since June.

Here it is guys...

"Notebook" means the stats that I input manually in my marble notebook after checking my balance total before and after play.

"PT4" is what PT4 stats say I won/lost.

"PTH" is hands played according to PT.

"D/C's" is disconnects from sessions.

================================================== ===







Wish there was an easier way to keep records but for me, there isn't.
A couple things about my current records... I've had a ton of disconnection problems and that has cost me volume and profits since I'm getting kicked off tables a majority of the time as the big stack. It's been going on for roughly 3 months now, so last week I added a column just for D/C's.

This has dramatically reduced my urge to grind at full capacity b/c many times after it happens, I don't want to open 4 more tables and start from scratch again. Recently, I've changed my mindset and forced myself to open 4 more and put in the volume anyway. As you can see, I'm slowly increasing my tables and volume as I continue to plug leaks.

I'm hoping this will be the solution to my D/C's...



Trying to stop using WIFI and use a hardwired connection so I can keep my stacks and apply max pressure at my tables.

Here's some SS's I took to keep as desktop wallpapers and stuff...

Here are some screenshots from my Poker Income app for ipad...

My 1/2 NL at Horseshoe casino in the past 2 years...


Here is my current totals for 10 and 25 NL the last 5-6 months...


I have played 0 live games since I took a break from MTT's, it's all been 6max online. My live games, believe it or not were sessions where I hardly ever bluffed. Sure, I bluffed small pots here and there but not really any "big" bet bluffs. This is no longer the case since I have become a competent LAG from playing 6max online for 1/2 a year.

I have worked diligently on increasing my aggression and using my image properly to work on my hand-reading and bluffs. I can't wait to see how much my win-rate will improve from bluffing pots, picking off bluffs and the action I get now b/c of my new weapons. The same can be said about MTT's, both live and online.

I wish I could share my PT4 stats for graphs and stuff... unfortunately, I had issues setting up my new PPH HUD and deleted my DB since it was causing a TON of errors when my new HUD was being used. I also added custom panels to it too. I thought everything was already backed up but when I went to import the DB again, it was gone. Not a big deal I guess, as the stats were incredibly off anyway.

Here is my current routine broken down into 4 groups.

I'll get you guys up to speed w/ what I do exactly and why for each task until it's all explained. What apps I use, where to get it, etc.

Lumosity app - helps to keep your brain in the best possible shape while improving on weaknesses. It's a free cognitive brain training app that is available for all devices including Apple and Android. I use the free version and it's good enough for me. I have slowly seen my weaknesses improve over a year. My biggest weakness was memory, all other areas were above average. This makes sense as I have been smoking the ganja from 17 years of age to now. FWIW, I have cut down dramatically in the past year and will be quitting come January for the good of my game. I went from smoking a gram a day for the 7+ years and have reduced my intake by 80-90% in the last year to help me transition easier to quitting come next year.



My memory score 7 months ago was about 880 so yeah, it's improving slowly but I'm sure once I quit, it'll improve at a faster rate. I love to smoke but it's time I gave it up if I want to reach the highest level possible as quickly as I can. Gonna miss you Mary, we've had some good times.

I follow this schedule everyday except for Mondays and Thursdays. These are my days off so I don't get burned out along my journey. On my days off, I do most of the things on my list except for physical activities and playing poker. I am trying to unwind on my days off but I find myself sneaking back to the computer to read up on forums and stuff for 3-4hours a day across 4 different forums.

It's a huge improvement over my first 7-8 years so it's going to take some time to be comfortable w/ staying away from all poker activities on my day off. I just can't help it sometimes. Like I said, I used to just grind w/ almost no study and forum posting for much of my career so this is a step in the right direction. The feedback I get is an extra boost of motivation and helps me to improve constantly, even on my days off. It's hard for me to spend a whole day doing non-poker things but I'm working on it.

So I went to bed last night at 5am reading forums again. I feel cracked out right now after finishing 1/2 of my to-do list. I think I'll rest today and get at it tomorrow fully refreshed. This was supposed to be a thread for venting and posting interesting hands but I want to document every step of the way. I will be holding nothing back. If I make a bone-headed play, you'll see it. If I lose 5+ buy-ins in a sess, you'll know about it. If I get out-played you'll see the HH. Nothing will be held back. I felt it was important to reveal ALL my results to help show what my current situation is so I have something to compare my results to in the future.

If you guys have any suggestions, I'd love to hear it... no matter the topic. I'm hoping revealing everything and being honest will keep me more accountable for all my actions.

LOL, it wouldn't affect me at all if I just had starting stacks on those tables. When I have a chance to pillage a table and it's taken away from me... yeah, I'm gonna be pissed. If you can't see why that would bother someone, I don't know what to tell you.

35? Ok, I haven't even come close to 35 since it starting happening, not even close to half that in 2+ months. FYI, every time I was pissed, it was when I had huge edges at my "TABLES", not "TABLE" w/ my stacks, image and profit potential over those opponents at the tables I was the big stack.

It's clear as day to me now that you just love to troll based on your (limited) post history, so there's not even a need for me to go any further w/ you on this.

Thanks for the constructive criticism though, hope you feel better about yourself now.

not sure what your internet issues are, are the dc's bodogs fault? is it your wifi adapter on your pc/laptop? is it your modem/router? is it the ISP? this is something you should be able to figure out in about 5 mins and remedy.

you cant be a pro without 2 internet lines from 2 diff providers anyway. its pointless to do all the study and brain exercises if you dont have 2x rocksolid internet connections.

not sure what your internet issues are, are the dc's bodogs fault?
Most likely, hoping a hardwired connection solves most of my D/C's.

is it your wifi adapter on your pc/laptop?
No.

is it your modem/router?
Small chance/no.

is it the ISP?
No.

this is something you should be able to figure out in about 5 mins and remedy.

Not w/o a 100 ft. CAT5 cable to test a hardwired connection.
Hardwiring my connection from my router is my first solution, then replacing my modem... I am not using WIFI connections to grind anymore, that's the main takeaway.

Just checked up on my Amazon order:

Estimated delivery date:
Tuesday, December 8, 2015 -
Thursday, December 24, 2015

FFS, the cables are coming from China, SMH. Just going to have to tolerate these D/C's for a month more... hopefully I don't get 2 per day like my last sess. ALWAYS check the seller location, not just the reviews.

Meditate - I have 2 apps I use for this, both free, both for Apple/Android... I'm pretty sure.

Stop, breathe & think is the first app. I use this when I need to work on some specific emotions. This app will recommend different types of meditation based on current feelings and can go as long 5-20 minutes per meditation.




Pacifica is the second app. This is my daily meditation app I use in the mornings for 2-3 minutes before I do anything else. I sometimes use this twice a day if I feel I need more clarity/focus right before a grinding. If something happens and my mind is all over the place right before a sess, I'll fire this up for a quick 2-3 minute meditation.




I suggest you get both and see which you like better. Both keep logs of your sessions and can remind you if you set the alarms. You can also upgrade to the paid version which has some nice perks. I use both free versions but am considering getting the paid version for Pacifica.

Thought this was another good read...

https://medium.com/synapse/motivatio...k-359d328d1445