So not much time to post lately, but I'll just hit the most mockable moment of my recent adventures.

Apparently having bought a plantation house, I have now decided to go full Southern Gentleman and get gout. Did not realize that was still a thing. Afraid I'll get scurvy next.

Dammit anyways! I feel your pain man. I get it in my left knee every once in a while.

I will never forget the first time it happened either. The girls were out of town for the little ones b-day and I was home because I couldn’t take the time off from work. Chef was out of town so me and the other sous chef had to run the show.

When I woke up in the morning to go open I stepped out of bed with my left foot and fell right to the floor in ****ing tears. My knee was the size of a grapefruit, no range of motion and I couldn’t put the slightest bit of weight on it.

Ended up having to take the week off anyway. Heard the team had a pretty rough time. Pretty sure my week sucked just as much though.

I get the gout in my toes and ankles. It’s straight up the worst. When I get it in my ankle, it quite literally makes walking impossible due to any pressure, and I mean any, on my foot causing immense pain.

I’ve heard gout is very painful and the pain is compounded by the fact that 99% of non gout sufferers think it’s 1. self imposed and 2. very funny

It’s utterly excruciating. Not to gout-splain, but what happens is crystals form in the fluid around the joint and it’s un phucking bearable. Entirely.


Imagine shards of glass grinding all over each other inside your knee/ankle/toes.

And phuck that 99% too btw. Gout is the WOAT!

Sorry Garick. I'm sure your doctor told you that beer consumption is one of the contributing factors to gout.

There's a great drug for managing gout called allopurinol, ask your doctor about it

Venice is one of the 99% who says it’s self imposed

Prolly finds it funny too

Bacon, regular soda and shrimp too

Every person is different. Beer ****s me up quickly, to the point that I don’t drink it anymore, bacon I eat regularly without much issue

Sadly, yes. I've been beerless for four days now.

i just drink more scotch

I just had to look up gout and who gets it etc. Y'all sound like a bunch o pussays!

Didn't get gout on the back nine yesterday but did get some diarrhea (not sure if it was kidney stone related or heat-strokey related or food related or what). Thankfully there always seemed to be a washroom/outhouse available when I needed it (which was 3 times in a span of 8 holes) so I never had to make a Feely in the middle of the fairway. Managed to shoot a 42 on the back which I think is only 1 off my record best, so my new swing will obviously be developed around trying not to **** myself when making contact.

(getting a real sense of deja vu as I type up this story, have I done this before?)

GcluelessdiarrheagolfingnoobG

G (and others)... as some know, my wife is a retired rheumatology doc. Much experience with treating gout (and pseudo-gout). Ask if you have any questions.

My embarrassing moment of the day/night: Bought a Big Green Egg smoker two weeks ago and have tried a few cooks since then. Yesterday I get the brilliant idea to do an overnight, very slow cook of a beef brisket. Get the Egg up to a steady 220° at 10PM, add a few soaked apple chips and put my meat on (there ya go Skip).

Just as I am drifting off, I realize that we have bears in the neighborhood (one knocked over our hummingbird feeder a week ago). I go out to the deck and surround the Egg with every table, chair, umbrella, wind chime and every kitchen sink I can find. Still didn't manage any sound sleep.

At 9AM, the beef is 165° and almost ready for butcher paper wrap. Hope I don't sleep thru dinner.

It's like King is on this years Alone "Bear Mountain" (anyone else an Alone fan?) where everyone has to protect their food from local grizzlies / black bears.

GAloneinthe'BurbsG

Just finished the 100 day arctic challenge. I feel like the grizzled Alaskan that won had an unfair advantage in that he was already a hermit living in the arctic. Also too much variance in whether you got the side of the lake that froze up quick or not.

Honestly, I'm waiting for someone to choose a spear-gun as one of their 10 items. Seems to give you the best aspects of a bow & arrow along with a gun. I'm far from an expert, but I'm pretty sure you could kill a bear with a spear-gun. It'd be a grizzly scene.

I'll show myself out.

slowclap

Gyes,showingyourselfoutwouldprobablybebestG

I chuckled.

But for real a bear would **** you up if you went after it with a spear gun.

I always figured your buttcheeks were at maximum clench at all times anyway

That is my stopgap position.

Guy at my work has had gout since he was 27. I'll count my blessings that I got to get old first, at least.

Sure hope this was a one-off based on the move, underhydration, etc., and not the start of a new chapter in my life.

Jelly

That dude killed the musk ox with a knife and his hands. Obviously his experience made it easier for him.

That show is funny bc they're spending all their time outside to make their inside nicer.

What's in the cupboard? Anything good?