Quote:
Originally Posted by asdfasdf32
I understand. It's just, there are things that happen in your mind, such as inspiration, having a concept "click", sadness when watching a movie, feeling inspired, etc. which, some of the time (I think you would admit) is not the product of God. Presumably you feel God also helps you with those things some of the time.
How are you determining the times when God is driving the experience versus not driving the experience.
"Driving" feels like too strong of a word. Maybe something more like "actively influencing" is better. With "driving" there's a sense of out-of-control-ness that doesn't fit. (I'm not suddenly possessed by anything or whatever.)
Most of the time, I don't know. And most of the time, it doesn't actually matter, so I don't bother wondering.
That being said, there are times that I suspect it. For example, there are times when I appear to be aware of stuff that's beyond what I should naturally be aware of. This also tends to happen more often in conversations that are "deeper" (more meaningful, higher impact on the person's life, whatever you want to call it). Sometimes in those situations, I find myself talking a little ahead of my thoughts. This is particularly odd, because my talking (especially in these types of conversations) is usually very carefully paced, with extreme care with the choice of words that I use. It's something that could be attributed to verbal processing, but verbal processing isn't something that I tend to do. It leads to a response that sounds sort of like "How did you know about that?" to which my reply is something like "Know about what?" And then this takes the conversation to a new level.
You also have to recognize that sometimes it's not me who is being influenced. Sometimes in these conversations, the other person "feels" something (I never quite know what that means) or says something that surprises them. And then after they say it, the conversation goes deeper.
I don't want to give the impression that these are daily experiences. Most of the time, prayer doesn't lead to anything specifically deep or different or anything like that.
There is a sense in my prayers that is similar to Brother Lawrence's reflections on the matter:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Practicing the Presence of God, emphasis mine
That, when he [Brother Lawrence] began his business, he said to GOD, with a filial trust in Him, "O my GOD, since You art with me, and I must now, in obedience to Your commands, apply my mind to these outward things, I beseech You to grant me the grace to continue in Your Presence; and to this end do You prosper me with Your assistance, receive all my works, and possess all my affections."
As he proceeded in his work, he continued his familiar conversation with his Maker, imploring His grace, and offering to Him all his actions.
When he had finished, he examined himself how he had discharged his duty; if he found well, he returned thanks to GOD; if otherwise, he asked pardon; and without being discouraged, he set his mind right again, and continued his exercise of the presence of GOD, as if he had never deviated from it. "Thus," said he, "by rising after my falls, and by frequently renewed acts of faith and love, I am come to a state, wherein it would be as difficult for me not to think of GOD, as it was at first to accustom myself to it."
I don't claim to have such a deep connection, but the non-discreteness of prayer (as a specific act and also what I "get" from that specific act) relative to other actions is expressed in these words. It becomes part of the "grid" through which other things are analyzed. Or perhaps a "lens" through which I view the world around me.