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omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house

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Old 09-20-2015, 11:12 AM   #8176
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Quote:
Originally Posted by allinontheturn View Post
Jay a queef is a pussy fart fyi.
Not really a fart at all, there shouldn't be gas producing bacteria in a vagina, unless we're talking ladyboys
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:17 AM   #8177
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

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Originally Posted by allinontheturn View Post
That's happened to me before Kristy. I've had to explain what a queef was twice to women in their sixties.
That exact scenario happened last night with Grandma Liz!

Her: reads queefing card, "Wha?"
Me: it is a fart, but not from your bum
Her: where else could it come from?
Me: your vagina
Her: but those don't fart?
Me: They sometimes can get air in them during sex
Her: Oh Grandpa Jim and I don't do that anymore, but 5 years ago...WATCHOUT. It was all the time, wasn't it, Jimmy
Grandpa Jim: oh boy, was it ever!
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:18 AM   #8178
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

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Jay a queef is a pussy fart fyi.
POTD
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:31 AM   #8179
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

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Originally Posted by wisski View Post
Not really a fart at all, there shouldn't be gas producing bacteria in a vagina, unless we're talking ladyboys

Wow such a 1950s conception of farting. We've got legal gay marriage now, I think it's time for you to liberalize your definition of farting.
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:40 AM   #8180
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

**** it. There's not point dirtying dishes when I'm going away on Tuesday. Might as well just get take out food again .
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:44 AM   #8181
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

However you need to justify it fatty
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:44 AM   #8182
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Nobody spoil the F1. I'm going to watch the highlights show once I got my food.
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:45 AM   #8183
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

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Originally Posted by allinontheturn View Post
However you need to justify it fatty
I mean, I haven't really eaten much since breakfast, so it should be fine.
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Old 09-20-2015, 11:45 AM   #8184
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

I am literally eating take out right now ftr.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:05 PM   #8185
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Take-AWAY, fagits
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:09 PM   #8186
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Quote:
Originally Posted by allinontheturn View Post
Jay a queef is a pussy fart fyi.
Thanks.
We didn't have the urban dictionary, back in the day. I remember the first time I experienced a "queef". I giggled out loud.
Your mom was so embarrassed.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:11 PM   #8187
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Dammit, Kristy, don't encourage him.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:12 PM   #8188
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Da33le View Post
Nobody spoil the F1. I'm going to watch the highlights show once I got my food.
I do t think the other person that follows F1 posts on 2+2.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:21 PM   #8189
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

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Originally Posted by The Brickie View Post
Take-AWAY, fagits
Seems incorrect
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:31 PM   #8190
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

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Originally Posted by The Brickie View Post
Take-AWAY, fagits
*chippy

Jay that must have been a long time ago - my mom doesn't embarrass so easily these days.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:33 PM   #8191
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Kristy tell GW his football team sucks and he should feel bad for supporting them tyia.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:37 PM   #8192
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

I only come here to see if BoSoxBK showed up and mentioned my name, so that I can grasp at the thought that there's a woman in the world who occasionally thinks about me that isn't my mum.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:38 PM   #8193
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

I typically avoid 1st person sex stories, but something just happened to me and I'm going to break my rule...

So, we weren't planning to have sex. He was still in bed, and I just came in to get dressed, but it ended with him tossing his phone aside on the bed and me facedown, bottom. Just before he finished, I felt his phone vibrating against my side but I'm not super-aware of my surroundings at the high points...I grab the phone and shove it aside without really paying it much mind.

A minute later we collapse, and I regain my wits a bit and it occurs to me that there is a very real possibility I just answered his phone while we were having sex.

I grab his phone and say, make sure we're not a phone sex line

He looks and says, FF football--tre mason injury report...
I insta-snatched phone, exclaiming "He's on my bench in the other league, too" and I hold out the phone and we both read the report before we realize he's still balls deep in me.

He rolls off, and we silently high-five and I go to the washroom to tidy up.
When I come out he says, strategy session? And we run over our line-ups without a hint of a post-sex cuddle.

What have I become?
FF>ALL.
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Old 09-20-2015, 12:45 PM   #8194
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

I know I'm not a girl, but I think about you
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Old 09-20-2015, 01:01 PM   #8195
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

I'm not a girl & I never think of you.

Spending all my time thinking about GW balls deep in Kristy (:[
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Old 09-20-2015, 01:04 PM   #8196
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

LET US FOOTBALL
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Old 09-20-2015, 01:06 PM   #8197
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

I just shot 30$ of ammunition in 10 shots. Elk rifle is dead nuts on at 200 yards .300 win mag confirm kicks like a mule.

Kristys story seems like she "yada yada'ed" sex, could use more detail and photographs to help
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Old 09-20-2015, 01:27 PM   #8198
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Quote:
Originally Posted by FranFran View Post
You are planning a trip to Zagreb? Are you from Florida or I mixed something up?
I am eligible for an EU passport, so I'm gonna get one soon and eventually use it.

I am from South Carolina.
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Old 09-20-2015, 01:37 PM   #8199
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Da33le View Post
Nobody spoil the F1. I'm going to watch the highlights show once I got my food.
was a good wan!

Quote:
Originally Posted by JustJ46671 View Post
I do t think the other person that follows F1 posts on 2+2.
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Old 09-20-2015, 01:39 PM   #8200
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Re: omg omg omg someone just invited me over their house (#154)

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kristy View Post
*dirty tale*
your sexuality makes me uncomfortable
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