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Old 12-27-2015, 12:44 AM   #1551
cushlash
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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I think we have a lot in common and a lot of the same feelings about poker.

Good to hear you made strides on your personal goals. I bet you had an amazing experience in Europe.

I wish you continued success in 2016!
Thanks man, same to you!
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Old 01-01-2016, 05:40 PM   #1552
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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. . . My life is about being the best human I can possibly be . . Happy Holidays!
I like your core values. Best of luck in anything and everything you do in 2016, and I hope that you keep posting here from time to time. I always enjoy hearing what you are up to.
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Old 01-08-2016, 07:11 PM   #1553
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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I like your core values. Best of luck in anything and everything you do in 2016, and I hope that you keep posting here from time to time. I always enjoy hearing what you are up to.
Thanks, likewise.

Writing helps me so I'm glad you and others on here enjoy it.
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Old 01-08-2016, 08:37 PM   #1554
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

I've been back in the swing of things here since I got back from my trip. Had a great time in Wisconsin and after about a week of being back on my regular diet and exercise routine I feel normal again. Basically ate non-stop for 10 days and while it was all delicious, I definitely feel worse when I eat that way.

I've played 4 sessions since I've been back and feel ok about them. Results haven't been great, though nothing horrific either. I think I'm playing well, though there are definitely times when I have a lapse in concentration and play some hands badly. Its a pretty small sample size though so some short-term run-bad may be causing me to find mistakes in hands I played fine, an issue I have struggled with a lot in the past.

Its nice to be good with poker again. I've been talking hands with a friend of mine and that has sparked my interest a bit. Most of my issues have come right down to mindset. I have talked about the negativity of the casino atmosphere in the past, and while I stand by what I've said, my attitude towards it made things even worse. When I go in expecting negativity, that's exactly what I get.

I haven't personally worked as an employee since 2010, and I think I developed the false idea that regular jobs, as a rule, are positive atmospheres, or at the very least less negative than poker. That simply isn't true. When I realized I had this assumption and began to question it, I started paying more attention when I was out to see if I could find evidence for or against. What I found was there is negativity basically everywhere. I notice it when dealing with other people in their jobs, mostly involving the service industry. I also notice it when talking to non-poker friends complaining about their jobs.

I had a conversation today with my brother, who played full time all last year in Wisconsin. I was curious about his overall thoughts about it after being at it for over a year now. Like just about anyone that plays full time for even a year, he acknowledges that there are advantages and disadvantages. But when I asked about the atmosphere stuff, on which he is aware of my viewpoint, he said he just doesn't see it that way. He says that there was just as much, if not more negativity in his previous job than in the poker room. He also reminded me of the atmosphere at a golf course we both used to work at that was particularly toxic and tense. Its easy to forget what its like to work a real job when I haven't for so long. Hearing him say that he gets to play a game he enjoys and joke around with casino goofballs talking about sports and whatnot puts things in a different perspective for me.

That's not to say that poker is better than all normal jobs. Its not unlikely that there's something I'd like better which has a positive, uplifting culture. I certainly haven't found it yet, because whenever I get an idea for a new direction, it doesn't take long before I realize that path has some key disadvantages which make poker more attractive given my goals right now. Even still, my attitude towards poker has been much too negative and that is causing some of my issues. Perception is reality.

Consequently, my performance in poker has been sub-par. In talking to my brother I realized that right now he is a much better professional poker player than me. I'm still confident that I'm better at the game of poker than he is, but he is far and away better at being a pro than I am right now. Exhibit A is our volume. He played over twice as many hours as me last year and the nearest casino to where he lives is an hour away.

Maybe I'm just rationalizing so I can just keep playing poker, which seems right now to be the path of least resistance. Though when I think about it and am reminded of the advantages, poker comes out on top of just about any job I can think of. That doesn't mean I want to grind poker the rest of my life. I still want to use poker to build wealth, diversify and create other income streams, but getting a job doesn't fit with that plan.

I have a lot of mindset things to work on, some related to the negativity discussion here and some related to actual poker play. Despite that, poker seems to be the way for me right now. As regular readers know, my feelings have the potential to change pretty rapidly on this subject. Though I think the fact that I feel this way in the middle of a fairly extended break even stretch says a lot about the validity of those thoughts.

I've got a pretty solid routine going with poker, exercise, diet, social life and reading/writing so I hope I can keep that going. As I said in my last post, I don't see myself making any drastic changes, just small positive adjustments along the way that all add up to big improvements. I hear a lot of people lately discussing New Years resolutions and I sort of cringe. Most people seem to want to either make a huge change all at once or change way too many things at the same time. From my experience, this simply doesn't work. Its all about making one small change at a time, only moving on when that change has become a habit. The cumulative effects of this are gigantic.

Last edited by cushlash; 01-08-2016 at 08:42 PM.
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Old 01-14-2016, 02:32 PM   #1555
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

Thanks for chiming back in Cush! Glad to hear you are feeling well and back on the grind.
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Old 01-17-2016, 10:53 PM   #1556
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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Thanks for chiming back in Cush! Glad to hear you are feeling well and back on the grind.
Thanks man, glad people are still reading as I've been horrible with updating lately. Gonna try my best to do something at least weekly. Update incoming.
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Old 01-17-2016, 11:46 PM   #1557
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

Hey guys! As I said above, gonna try and get back to updating more regularly. Unfortunately I've been sick the last several days and that's derailed my poker play somewhat. Before that I had been trucking along at my desired pace, mostly sticking to 2/5 at the wynn. That's been my regular game/location for almost a year now since Venetian started going downhill, a track they have continued with almost violent dedication.

My results continue to be very flat, which strangely motivates me far better than winning or losing ever do. A combination of boredom and poor game quality recently had me seeking a change of pace. Sure I could just go to a different casino (gasp!), but I went full 180 and chose to not only change venues but change games also, at least temporarily. Set my sights on some plo at aria, which was my regular scene for a time in 2012. Damn I'm getting old.

When I arrived there were no seats so I settled on some 2 card poker while I waited. Even though I have a strong dislike for the cramped quarters and pool hall style lighting of the aria poker room, it was a breath of fresh air. The 2/5 games just looked softer that what I've seen at wynn lately. Maybe they're all regs I just don't know, but at least I can play with some new faces. An orbit in I'm called for the plo game. My 2/5 game is good but I leave anyway. I came here for a change of pace and I'm gonna get it even if costs me some EV.

I decide to buy in for the minimum and feel it out, as my plo game is sure to be rusty as ****. Lost a bit calling raises and folding bad flops. This didn't really go along with my plan of limp/reraising my AA** hand preflop and getting it in on all flops ever.

Topped up and got felted with my nut flush draw all in on the flop. The game seemed full of at least semi-competents, save my recent villain, who now boasted well over the max. Ok fine, if he's gambling I'm in. Not long after putting a full buy in on the table I end up in a 3 way all in on the flop in a 4 bet pot. My nut flush draw+OESD gets there on the river, though it's only good for a chop against the same OESD. A couple hands later I'd felt another pro with AA** and the nut flush draw all in on the flop, spiking my flush on the river. Suddenly I'm in the black 600 after starting in a 1k hole.

I left a couple hours later nearly dead even, undoubtedly having run above expectation. That was enough of a change of pace for me. Back to the bread and butter of holdem. As much as I'd like to dive into some other games, financially it doesn't make sense by my estimation. As Limon once told me in response to a question I put in his thread, you gotta play what makes sense. In Vegas and for the stakes I can afford, that's holdem.

So once my cold subsided, I was back at Aria again, this time for some $2-$5 unlimited betting, Texas-style hold them poker. Had a fairly uneventful session, though it was cool to play a familiar game with largely unfamiliar opponents.

I look forward to keeping things going poker-wise. This post is getting long, and I don't go into much detail about my non-poker life anyways, so I'll just say all that stuff is moving right along. The area that's been lacking the last year+ has been poker, so I need to change that, and despite some lackluster results, this year has been a good start for that.

I've done a lot of exploration of opportunities outside of poker in the recent past, but right now I'm quite happy to be a professional poker player. A good friend of mine just took a full time job after a long stretch of pro poker. He's working 40 hours a week in a cubicle, which obviously isn't anyone's ideal scenario, but he's rightfully excited about the track he's on for the future and being able to play a few hours a week on the side with almost no stress. I think thats great and I envision a similar paradigm for myself in the future, but at 24 (my friend is 30), I still have a few years at least in which the freedom from poker outweighs the advantages of a more steady job.

I'm more unsure of what things will look like a year from now than I ever have been in my life and I'm very excited about that. I'm also excited to feel a sense of motivation towards poker instead of chasing uninformed, idealized, false paradigms of other options.

Thanks for reading.

Last edited by cushlash; 01-17-2016 at 11:51 PM.
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Old 01-18-2016, 11:25 PM   #1558
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

I've played some Aria 2/5/10 PLO, It's not always soft but its a great game for nits. ($7 per orbit in blinds and you open pot to $40, $1500 buyin and it gets deep quickly.)
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Old 01-19-2016, 05:59 AM   #1559
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

Good reading those past few pages mate. Makes me keen to weigh up what i want to do also. I may PM you sometime
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Old 01-21-2016, 03:19 AM   #1560
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

Been reading this for probably at least a year now. I think you write very well and with enjoyable candor. Thanks for sharing all you have, and wishing you continued success in poker and life.
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Old 01-24-2016, 03:00 AM   #1561
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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Good reading those past few pages mate. Makes me keen to weigh up what i want to do also. I may PM you sometime
Thanks man, yea feel free.

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Been reading this for probably at least a year now. I think you write very well and with enjoyable candor. Thanks for sharing all you have, and wishing you continued success in poker and life.
Thanks man, likewise.
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Old 01-24-2016, 03:42 AM   #1562
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

Hey guys, I've been back at the Wynn again this week. Results have continued to be lackluster. My motivation is, however, much improved. I'm getting into the poker room on a more consistent basis and finding fewer excuses not to play. My sessions are still short though so I'm looking to extend them a bit.

I'm still having some issues with staying focused/engaged at the table, which is probably why I'm playing short sessions. I just get bored very easily when I'm not paying attention, but if I just pay attention the time goes by much more quickly. I've been working on this the best I can, using The Mental Game of Poker to help me along.

Today I actually decided to play a tournament for some reason. The Wynn is having a standalone tournament this weekend and I thought it would be a good change of pace. I busted out around 5 hours in, standard flip spot. I was very happy with my tournament, just wasn't my day.

All week people have been talking about this tournament being "good value". While in this particular instance I think they are right, this phrase is grossly overused in poker, particularly as it relates to tournaments. In conjunction with the $600 buy in tournament, the Wynn ran a few satellites. They were $80 buy-ins, $20 of which was taken for house and staff fees. That's a 25% vig. When I heard people describe this satellite as "good value", it made my head spin. What exactly do you mean by "good value"? There's just no chance a tournament with a 25% vig is good value, regardless of field softness. Frankly people just don't know what the **** they're talking about when they say shyt like this. I think the 600 event was good value because the field was soft, the vig was reasonable (12.17%), the buy-in was large enough to be worth my time, and most importantly, unlike during a longer series, it was the only major tournament this weekend, so everyone and their mother was playing, making the field big and thus allowing for the possibility of a major score, this possibility being basically the only reason I ever decide to play tournaments.

The main take home here is to think about the reasons for playing whatever game you decide to play. Saying its "good value" isn't enough. Why is it good value? And just as importantly, are those reasons logically valid? "Its only 80 bucks and you could win a seat and then win 60k" is not a valid reason. Nor is "Over 200 people have already been knocked out from the first 2 flights".

End my tournament rant.

And with that I'll be heading back to cash. It seems I'm getting some traction on the motivation front so I'm looking to continue that and hopefully the results will follow.
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Old 01-31-2016, 05:24 PM   #1563
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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Been reading this for probably at least a year now. I think you write very well and with enjoyable candor. Thanks for sharing all you have, and wishing you continued success in poker and life.
+1.
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Old 02-01-2016, 04:59 AM   #1564
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

What do you recommend to those who have been playing poker and not working and are looking to get back into the workforce and have a resume gap, would you write that you played poker professionally or say something else, does the length of the gap matter, what if it were just 5 or 6 months?
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Old 02-01-2016, 05:14 AM   #1565
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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What do you recommend to those who have been playing poker and not working and are looking to get back into the workforce and have a resume gap, would you write that you played poker professionally or say something else, does the length of the gap matter, what if it were just 5 or 6 months?
Just use your brain DonkSlayar. I don't mean this in a demeaning manner either. If you have over a year gap, you probably want to list it. If it's sub a year, probably don't list it.
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Old 02-02-2016, 12:19 AM   #1566
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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What do you recommend to those who have been playing poker and not working and are looking to get back into the workforce and have a resume gap, would you write that you played poker professionally or say something else, does the length of the gap matter, what if it were just 5 or 6 months?
Yea length of the gap matters. Lots of people are unemployed for a short stint for a variety of reasons. Like DanceForMe said, less than a year and its probably safe to leave it off, though depending on your industry you may still want to include it. As it gets longer you have to explain it though. How you do so depends on your age and the type of job you're looking for. As long as you were a reasonably intelligent pro it should be easy to explain positively by talking about money management, people skills, decision making, etc. If you started playing right out of school you can say you did it for the life experience before entering the workforce. Its pretty dependent on your personal situation so that's all I can really say without knowing more about your situation. Feel free to post here or pm me if you want to more specific answer.

For me personally, I'm young, started playing right out of college, have been reasonably deliberate/disciplined in my approach to poker, and if I applied for jobs in the area I studied (finance), would be in an industry that at least somewhat understands and respects professional poker. I'm also pretty good at spinning it positively both on paper and when talking to people so I would include it. My gap is also too long and without anything else substantial career-wise so I couldn't feasibly leave it out without it being a negative.
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Old 02-02-2016, 05:50 PM   #1567
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

Trying to stay in town or looking at different parts of the country?
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Old 02-03-2016, 01:53 AM   #1568
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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Trying to stay in town or looking at different parts of the country?
Asking me or DonkSlayer? I was just responding to his question, using myself as an example if I was applying to jobs. I'm not currently actively seeking employment. My bad, the way I worded that part of the post was somewhat misleading.
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Old 02-11-2016, 04:09 AM   #1569
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

I feel like I'm getting myself back into a groove here with poker. I've been playing mostly Wynn 2/5, though I have forayed into a few other locations recently.

I went out to Red Rock one day for a weekly 5/10 game. I ran quite well but I thought the games were actually pretty awful. I didn't play long. Oral Hershiser was at my table which was kinda cool. For those that don't know he used to be a pitcher in the MLB and is an avid poker player. Never watched him as a baseball player but he was featured during the ME one year back when I actually watched poker on TV.

Also went to Bellagio one day, for what reason I really don't know. Played for less than an hour and left. That place is just so depressing to me for some reason. No one is happy and it rubs off on me and makes me feel as miserable as everyone else there. I've talked to many other Vegas regs and many report the same type of thing so I know its not just me. Games sucked too, though 1 hour is obviously a ridiculous sample size to go off. Even if its marginally better there I think the life EV of not being in such a miserable place outweighs it for me.

So yea, mostly sticking with the Wynn, though to be quite honest game quality hasn't been spectacular there either. Despite this, I'm getting some traction with my motivation and have been playing pretty regularly. Sessions have gotten slightly longer as well. At least part of the reason for that is that I've been more focused on improving and talking hands with poker friends. Time goes by way faster when I'm thinking about the game and trying to do my best rather than grinding while looking at the clock.

This week I've had a few significantly positive sessions for the first time this year, which is obviously nice. Its funny, I feel very content to be back to poker and I'm enjoying the way its fitting with my life. I still know it won't be forever but I'm less anxious about finding what I'm going to do next and just enjoying what I'm doing now. I don't really know why, but I feel confident that everything will shake out just fine and I'm quite alright that exactly how it will shake out remains to be seen. Poker has a way of teaching us how to be ok with, even embrace, uncertainty.
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Old 02-11-2016, 04:27 AM   #1570
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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Oral Hershiser was at my table which was kinda cool. For those that don't know he used to be a pitcher in the MLB and is an avid poker player. Never watched him as a baseball player but he was featured during the ME one year back when I actually watched poker on TV.
I was telling my Uncle who is a big sports buff about playing with Mr Hershiser this summer. My Uncle told me that in order to break the 59 inning scoreless record the final game of the regular season needed to go into extra innings. He said I should ask Mr Hershiser what he offered his teammates to make sure they didn't score the first 9 innings haha.

He seemed like a really nice guy.
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Old 02-11-2016, 05:51 AM   #1571
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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I was telling my Uncle who is a big sports buff about playing with Mr Hershiser this summer. My Uncle told me that in order to break the 59 inning scoreless record the final game of the regular season needed to go into extra innings. He said I should ask Mr Hershiser what he offered his teammates to make sure they didn't score the first 9 innings haha.

He seemed like a really nice guy.
Thanks for the interesting thread Cush. Do you find the Wynn less depressing vs Bellagio? Still play at the V?

PA- Why would Orel care if his team scored? His streak was shutting out their opponent.
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Old 02-11-2016, 06:14 AM   #1572
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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Thanks for the interesting thread Cush. Do you find the Wynn less depressing vs Bellagio? Still play at the V?

PA- Why would Orel care if his team scored? His streak was shutting out their opponent.
The score had to be 0-0 to get extra innings, he needed at least 10 innings to break the previous record and it was the final game of the season.
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Old 02-11-2016, 03:30 PM   #1573
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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Thanks for the interesting thread Cush. Do you find the Wynn less depressing vs Bellagio? Still play at the V?
You're welcome! Yea Wynn is a much more enjoyable playing experience imo. I've only played a handful of times at V in the last 12 months. They started going downhill in a variety of ways about a year ago so I stopped going regularly. Then they got rid of player boxes and now raised rake and lowered comps so I just stay away. I may play there some when games at Wynn are bad but I don't see myself going there regularly any time soon.
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Old 02-11-2016, 03:33 PM   #1574
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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I was telling my Uncle who is a big sports buff about playing with Mr Hershiser this summer. My Uncle told me that in order to break the 59 inning scoreless record the final game of the regular season needed to go into extra innings. He said I should ask Mr Hershiser what he offered his teammates to make sure they didn't score the first 9 innings haha.

He seemed like a really nice guy.
Yea he seemed like a good guy, fun to play with.
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Old 02-13-2016, 08:48 AM   #1575
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Re: cushlash in Vegas; TLDR

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You're welcome! Yea Wynn is a much more enjoyable playing experience imo. I've only played a handful of times at V in the last 12 months. They started going downhill in a variety of ways about a year ago so I stopped going regularly. Then they got rid of player boxes and now raised rake and lowered comps so I just stay away. I may play there some when games at Wynn are bad but I don't see myself going there regularly any time soon.
I agree 100% re: Bellagio, and as you said, I can't quite properly explain it either. I give it a chance every trip, and without fail, in short order I'm wondering why I did.

I'm glad to hear you're doing well.
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