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12-18-2007 , 11:48 AM

lamboruns

centurion

Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 190

The guy that loves poker i invited was convincing me how AQ suited was a
3-1 favorite over QQ...cha ching

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12-18-2007 , 12:02 PM

nightday

newbie

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 30

Guy this past weekend was trying to telling me how stupid and horrible a pair of 6s were heads up

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12-18-2007 , 12:04 PM

lamboruns

centurion

Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 190

he told me i only had 1 queen to hit for a set but he had 3 aces he could hit to take the lead...lmfao

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12-18-2007 , 02:03 PM

MikeTheGeek

journeyman

Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 226

Hero checks with the nuts
Newb: "F*** it, I'm all in!"

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12-18-2007 , 02:54 PM

Bluegrass Poker

journeyman

Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 321

Newb at our game called a big preflop raise, another player went all in. Original raiser called and newb called.

After the hand the newb says "I put you both on pocket pairs but didn't think you had aces so I had to call." Newb has A7o. I love people who think it's good to call huge amounts thinking all they need to do is hit one of their three cards!

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12-18-2007 , 03:25 PM

MikeTheGeek

journeyman

Join Date: Aug 2007 Posts: 226

"I had the nut flush draw, so I had to call"
"I had an open-ended straight draw, so I had to call"

In Omaha Hi-Lo, which constantly befuddles the new guys (hey, I was there once):
"I had the second best high hand, and a good low, so I had to call"
or better yet
"I had A2 so I figured I had a 50-50 shot at winning half the pot"

There was a thread like this in the B&M forum as well.

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12-18-2007 , 03:46 PM

Small Fry

old hand

Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,883

Since we appear to be equating new with bad, I like to hear them say "I call".

Taking a road trip to Stacked City with a quick stop in Value Town

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12-18-2007 , 04:25 PM

Zagga

old hand

Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,800

Quote:

Originally Posted by lamboruns

he told me i only had 1 queen to hit for a set but he had 3 aces he could hit to take the lead...lmfao

Sounds more like a pro level of someone who has been reading 2+2 at least bbv for a while

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12-18-2007 , 04:31 PM

Lucypher

grinder

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 427

"Any 2 cards can win." Also, after calling a raise with crap, "I had to call, I was s00ted."

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12-18-2007 , 04:34 PM

#10

Zagga

old hand

Join Date: Feb 2007 Posts: 1,800

I think the best thing is too see him do something that is so stupid it shows he has no idea of poker and at least havent hardly ever played.

like this: blids 100-200 SNG, someone raises to 600, guy reraises to 850.

Now you know what kind of player you are dealing with

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12-18-2007 , 04:39 PM

#11

wsock23

enthusiast

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 75

"It's my favorite hand I alwyas play it" - w 10-4 off or similar garbage
"7's have been hitting all day I had to see the flop" - justifying calling a raise w 7-3
"I had a king I should've called" - after tanking thinking about a preflop raise, and the guy shows pocket queens
"I hate pocket aces. They never win"

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12-18-2007 , 05:04 PM

#12

Black Aces 518

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2004 Posts: 9,462

Yeah, any version of "I hate ___, it never wins", almost always AK or AA, sometimes jacks.

The mis-sized raise is good.

Anytime they are legit disappointed when they fold their J6o to a 4x raise and it comes JJ6 or whatever.

The "___s have been hitting tonight" is a great sign.

If they have to ask every time who are the blinds, it is annoying but profitable.

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12-18-2007 , 05:40 PM

#13

DavidNB

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Aug 2005 Posts: 4,332

The call bluff.

A player that once called a all in on the river when he knew he was beat and said, "I called as a bluff"

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12-18-2007 , 06:59 PM

#14

pfapfap

HP JoY 2011 wienerbucket

Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 22,537

At my tournament a few months back, we were at the final table in the money and someone folded AA preflop to a push and a re-push because "aces don't play well three-handed".

The only reason we know this is that one of the other players also had AA, and the folder said, "oh I had the same hand," with the tone like she had just seen J9s turned up. We looked at her muck, and sure enough.

Best part is that the AA lost to a one-card straight, thereby reinforcing her view.

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12-18-2007 , 07:51 PM

#15

wsock23

enthusiast

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 75

The call bluff is the winner.

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12-18-2007 , 07:58 PM

#16

pfapfap

HP JoY 2011 wienerbucket

Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 22,537

Oh goodness yes, I LOVE the river call bluff. "I didn't think you had anything." Er, yeah, but you have 9-high.

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12-18-2007 , 09:07 PM

#17

Etaipo

grinder

Join Date: Nov 2004 Posts: 523

"Hi!

I understand the mechanics of the game just fine. I know how the blinds work, how the button moves, and to act promptly, but only when its my turn.

However, I am thoroughly unskilled at poker. I won't hardly ever bluff you, but when I do its completely transparent. I will only raise with a monster pre-flop so you can safely fold. I will always believe your bluffs. I'm always willing to buy-in at least a few times before I give up for the night. That, plus I'm a pretty nice easy-going guy who won't get hammered and ruin everyones night. "

Ok, so I don't want to hear them say it, but I love to get this impression from them by the end of the first game.

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12-18-2007 , 09:37 PM

#18

garcia1000

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Dec 2004 Posts: 7,855

I like to hear them say "$1/2 blinds?! What's with these puny stakes? Forget it, I'm all in preflop every hand!"

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12-18-2007 , 10:05 PM

#19

pismeyer

adept

Join Date: Jan 2006 Posts: 847

"I got pot odds, I have to call."

Idiot turns over K4o and hero turns over QQ to a totally ragged flopped board.

Then idots says "I have outs, yes!"

When we asked the idiot to explain his "pot odd", he said one other person had bet out (all in) before him giving him the correct odds to call.

My comment was "Exactly what odds are you referring too when you have jack-sh_t?

He has shown up to my last 6 games, gosh I can't wait for my new season to start.

P

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12-18-2007 , 10:53 PM

#20

whisker

enthusiast

Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 80

I like hearing "How much more do I have to put in to keep playing this hand?"

Last edited by whisker; 12-18-2007 at 10:53 PM. Reason: typo

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12-18-2007 , 11:00 PM

#21

7Mickey

centurion

Join Date: Oct 2007 Posts: 123

after someone bets, newbie asks dealer "can i better it?", or, my favorite: "how much can i raise?"

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12-19-2007 , 02:06 AM

#22

KranMar

newbie

Join Date: Dec 2007 Posts: 44

Playing Omaha:

(at showdown)

me: trip kings

dude: nut straight, yaaaaallllll!

me: you can only use two cards

dude: oh

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12-19-2007 , 05:08 AM

#23

pfapfap

HP JoY 2011 wienerbucket

Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 22,537

Quote:

Originally Posted by pismeyer

My comment was "Exactly what odds are you referring too when you have jack-sh_t?

Darnit, DON'T TAP THE GLASS. Really, you should know better.

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12-19-2007 , 09:53 AM

#24

Lottery Larry

Home Poker Pimp

Join Date: Jun 2003 Posts: 19,603

"Thank you for inviting me- you have a great game and I had a great time.

Please keep me on the list. I'll be coming back regularly"

really, you greedy fools- you're not thinking this through ...