The afternoon, unless it be spent in the regular work—and in most cases, unless it be a prize fight or the like, we believe that the operation of training a man for his condition may go on just as well, if he continue about his daily work. The afternoon may be spent with the same objects in view as the morning. If, during the latter, the exercises have tended to develope the chest and arms, the afternoon may be devoted more to the locomotive organs. A long walk may be taken—or a good game at leaping, or any of the games that tax the legs—straddling, standing on one leg and dipping to the ground, so as to touch the other knee, etc.

We have thus indicated the mode of filling up the hours of the day; but still more is necessary. After a moderate supper, of some digestible dish, fruit, or cold meat, or stale bread, toast, or biscuit, with perhaps a cup of tea—the evenings ought to be devoted, to some extent at least, to friendly and social recreation, (not dissipation, remember.) Friends may be visited, or some amusement, or a stroll in company—or any other means that will soothe and gratify the mind and the affections, friendship, etc.—for every man should pride himself on having such affections, and satisfying them, too.

Ten o’clock at night ought to find a man in bed—for that will not afford him the time requisite for rest, if he rise betimes in the morning. The bedroom must not be small and close—that would go far toward spoiling all other observances and cares for health. It is important that the system should be clarified, through the inspiration and respiration, with a plentiful supply of good air, during the six, seven, or eight hours that are spent in sleep. During most of the year, the window must be kept partly open for this purpose.

The Sure Reward

Is not all this something worth a young man's while to strive for? We do not object to his careful and persistent regard for wealth, or for the objects of his business ambition, whatever they may be, but we say nothing ought to displace the pursuit we peak of - manly health and vigor. Even considered with reference to a far better capability of getting wealth, or of reaching the objects of ambition, health and strength are vitally important. With them of course, not only so much more can be done, but the strain can be borne so much longer. From a money-making point of view, therefore, health is an investment that pays better than any other.

But we do not recommend the planning out of life by a young man, to realize this long-continued stretch of forty years of full health and strength, in order that he may make money. We recommend it for itself - its own interest, reward, and its manliness. For, say what we may of the pleasures of the world, and of what is heroic, it comes down to this - that there can be no first-rate heroism except in a sound body, and that there really can be no gratification or pleasure, however costly, however much vaunted or rare, or sought for, that is equal to the delicious feeling, all through middle age, and even old age, of being perfectly well.

Wim Hof Training Method: Week 1, Day 1

Breathing Exercise (take a full breath in then exhale, repeat 30x, on the last exhale hold it for as long as possible and time it, then inhale and hold for 10 seonds, repeat for 3 rounds)

Round 1: 1m 11s
Round 2: 1m 17s
Round 3: 1m 33s

Cold Immersion

Took a warm shower, turning the water very cold for 30 seconds, then back to warm.

5/2/17

db squat: 23x10x4
db 1-leg deadlift: 23x12x4
db ohp: 23x10x3

5/3/17

lateral raise: 10x12x3
bentover db row: 33x12x2
hammer curl: 23x6x2

Wim Hof Training Method: Week 1, Day 2

Breathing Exercise

Round 1: 1m 26s
Round 2: 1m 51s
Round 3: 2m 7s

Pushups Without Breathing: 17 (do the same thing as in the breathing exercise, but when you hold your breath, immediately do pushups until either failure or until you need to breathe)

Cold Immersion

Did the 30 seconds cold shower again.

I wanted to try another exercise where you submerge your hand in ice water, but I wussed out. Will try tomorrow.

Virility--Prostitution

A man that exhausts himself continually among women, is not fit to be, and cannot be, the father of sound and manly children. They will be puny and scrofolous, a torment to themselves and to those who have the charge of them.

Wim Hof Training Method: Week 1, Day 3

Breathing Exercise
Round 1: 1m 49s
Round 2: 2m 12s
Round 3: 2m 23s

Cold Immersion

Cold shower for about 1 minute.

My sleep issues have been completely cured by a simple change of mindset.

The #1 reason I couldn't sleep was the fear of not sleeping. The moment I decided to let go and trust that my brain knows how to make me sleep if it needs to was the moment I allowed my brain to do its thing and make me sleep.

If I need sleep, my brain will make it happen. No amount of concsious forcefullness or effort will make it happen. In fact, the more effort I put into trying to go to sleep, the more anxiety I have about sleeping, which prevents my brain from sleeping.

If my brain needs sleep, it will sleep. If my brain needs to wake up, it will wake me up.

I listen to a lot of health podcasts. Sometimes they talk about how important sleep is. Typically what they do is have some doctor or scientist on as a guest. The guest will talk on and on and on and on about all the horrific adverse health consequences of chronic sleep deprivation. It's essentially fear-mongering. The problem is fear and anxiety about sleep, or lack of it, is the main reason I couldn't sleep well. So these podcasts made my sleep worse.

Inevitably on these podcasts, the discussion will then turn to "sleep hygiene." The guest, Dr. Fearmonger, will talk about how everyone needs to do 27 different things at night in order get to sleep properly. AND IF YOU DONT DO ALL THESE THNGS AND GET AT LEAST 8 HOURS OF SLEEP EVERY SINGLE NIGHT THEN YOU WILL GET CANCER AND HEART DISEASE AND AIDS AND CRASH YOUR CAR INTO A TREE OMG OMG OMG

You need to turn off all the electronics.
You need to wear blue light blocking goggles.
You need to only use your bed for sleeping.
You can't exercise too much.
You need to do some mild exercise.
You need to take a cold bath or shower.
You need to take a warm bath or shower.
You can't eat too late.
You can't eat this or that.
Your bedroom can't be too warm.
Your bedroom can't be too cold.
Your bedroom has to be completey dark.
Your bedroom has to be completely silent.
Your bedroom has to be clean and organized.
You can't have your phone near your bed.

This is all complete bull****. The one and only thing I needed to do to sleep is not be anxious about sleeping. All of these things I thought I had to do at night didn't work simply because they created anxiety and made me think too much about sleeping.

Sleeping is not a challenge or an intellectual exercise. It's something I need to let my brain do when it needs to do it. Sleep doesn't happen through effort, if anything its the opposite.

Lately I've been using my computer, watching tv, dorking around on my phone, etc. right up until, or even after I get into bed at night. And I'm sleeping better than I have in 15 years.

that's nice, how many hours/night are you getting now?

I don't know. I don't keep track, and I don't worry about it.

I've been lifting consistently for the last 2 weeks. I feel like I shouldn't even bother posting about it here because I know it's only a matter of time until I get derailed by the slightest injury/depression/whatever and lose the gains anyway. I can't even do the Wim Hof breathing exercise for more than 4 days in a row.

Have you considered attempting to lift heavy recently? Might be worth a go now you off the meds.

GL either way.

Define heavy. Srs question.

For most things I try to keep it in the 8-12 rep range cuz this is what most bro scientists say and I don't know any better. Some things like chinups I do less reps (today I did 4x4) cuz its hard to lessen the resistance to do more reps, and I don't wanna be some crossfit spaz who does all kinds of leg kicking sillyness. For ab stuff I do higher reps cuz I find it hard to add resistance.

Get on Starting Strength goddammit

I don't do barbells.

my boy alphadestiny got you covered

well yeah obv you gotta get stronk to get big. I've been increasing weight and/or reps almost every sesh. My training style appears to be working for strength gains just fine, it's that I get derailed so easily.

3 weeks ago I ****ed up my back doing db squats (same spot on the left side of my mid-back that I've been re-injuring about every 2 years since I was like 18). Had to lay on the floor for 4 hours. I still went to work that day tho, cuz I'm not a pussy. Couldn't do anything else for a week.

I'm not doing any squats anytime soon cuz I don't want that to happen again.

**** me I need to go to a doctor. Whenever I lift something with my right arm, even carrying a bag of groceries, I can feel something is not right with that same spot in my back. Feels like I have a rib scraping against a muscle or something. And I get random tingling sensations around that spot several times a day.

Good news: I can still do pushing lifts and chinups even when my back is ****ed.

Every day is chest/shoulder/arm/abs day for the time being. Have a dr. appointment for the 18th.

I will now start logging lifts again.

7/4/17

db bench 28x10x4
db ohp 23x9x4
db flys 18x15x4
lateral raise 13x15x4

7/6/17

chinup 4x5

7/8/17

db ohp 23x12x4
db flys 23x8x4
lateral raise 18x8x4
knee hugs 30x2

7/9/17

db bench 28x12x4

7/10/17

chinup 5x2

7/12/17

db bench 28x15x4
chinup 5x4
flys 23x12x4

7/13/17

db ohp 23x14x4
ran 1 mile in 10:40

Running buddy says she got a part in a play that rehearses tuesday mornings, which is when we run. So I might not see her for the next 3 months

Last time we went was 2 weeks ago. We mostly talked **** about our parents. She doesn't get along with her Trumpeter dad, and I hate my mom. She mentioned she wasn't getting enough sex in her marriage. I didn't know what to say to that lol.

Went to the doc this week. Had a cute and eager young asian med student give me a basic neurological exam and poke around after I told her about my back. Then the doc comes in and decides that if it doesn't hurt right now then I'm totally fine and she just gives me a script for anti-inflammatories. Which I threw away as soon as I got home.

Is there any other profession that requires so many years of training and produces people who are so ineffective at their job? I can't think of any.

I guess the plan now is to just wait until I **** it up again, then go back to the doc and demand to get referred to a specialist?

General life poast.

I've had my job for 1 year now. I've managed to save up about $13k. When I get that up to $20k I'll start looking for an apartment. It's been 8 years since I moved back in with my parents after living in Austin for 3 years while I was playing poker. It will be different this time. I moved to Austin with the mistaken belief that all I needed to do was get away from my parents and be alone 24/7 and I'd be happy. Unfortunately it's not so easy.

It dawned on me a few days ago that I don't hate myself. I haven't felt that way for literally 20 years. Now that I don't hate myself, the thought of being close to someone else doesn't freak me out like it always has. Funny how that works.

Another thing I've done for the last 20 years (very much related to hating myself) is ignoring/suppressing my sex drive. It was a way to protect myself from my mother's inaproppriate sexual behavior towards me. It probably helped me survive and prevent a lot of pain when I was younger, but for the last 10ish years it's just been one of the sources of my anxiety/depression issues.

It's a great feeling to at least know how to be a healthy functioning person (physically and mentally), even if I haven't completely put it into practice yet.

I'm really struggling with this, it's turning into a much bigger issue than I thought. I know it's not healthy to supress feelings, so I'm trying to let any sexual thoughts/feelings happen unrestrained. The problem is now it's so uncomfortable and I don't know how to deal with it.

2 weeks ago on the train I saw a fineass woman I wanted **** the **** out of, and I couldn't stop thinking about her. It was so intense and I felt like my mind was trapped in a loop of sexual fantaasy. The fear of losing control of my mind (plus the knowledge that I had to get off the train in 3 stops and my D was rock hard) induced a panic attack. I texted my running buddy that I was freaking out (with no further details obv), just because talking to someone else would help me get out of my own head, and I did some slow controlled breathing. I was able to stop the panic attack and get off the train without incident. I took a xanax when I got to work, and another one the next day.

Last week I went to my therapist for the first time in around 9 months. I told her about the episode on the train, that I've been having trouble dealing with the feeling of sexual arousal, and that I've been wanking 2-3x/day and watching tons of porn for the last few months, which is more than I ever have. She asked me some specific quesions about wanking and what happens when I feel aroused. I basically said I'm not comfortable with the feeling of sexual arousal. We made an appointment for next week, and she asked me to think more about what happens when I get aroused and try to identify all the thoughts and emotions that run through my head. So far I haven't been able to identify anything specific.

I've been kinda depressed ever since that **** happened on the train, and I try not to look at anyone on the train or on the street.

Got a raise today. Now I'll be making $14/hour slingin' fruit plates. We had a meeting and the chefs threw a lot of compliments at me, which was hard to take, but worth it to get a raise.

Back is still very ****ed. I'm going to a physical therapist next week to see what they have to say about it.

Still seeing my therapist every 2 weeks. I've uncovered some more memories about my mom that are more severe in terms of inapropriateness than all the others. Depression is strong, I can tell by how I've been posting on 2+2.

Wat


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