Put in a few sessions since my last post. Had a big winning session followed by a big (not as big) losing sesh. Gotta love the games here, lol.

I felt real good all day last Friday, so I decided to head in. I ate Panera Bread before, which was real good to eat again, but once I got to Harrah's and took a pre-sesh bathroom trip, I had some bleeding (again, same issue I had last time I went to the doc unscheduled). I didn't feel bad or anything, and I had already driven an hour, so I sat and started playing. I think I got up for the bathroom 2-3 times in 2 hours before I decided to call it a night. I started gradually feeling worse, and I just wasn't able to concentrate as a result. Frustrating. The bleeding/pain went away by the next day.

I had some scotch over the weekend with a couple friends (pics soon), and things seemed good. Then yesterday during the day, I started having some bleeding issues again. The pain got worse during the night last night (mostly crampy feeling, for lack of a better description, but sometimes sharp pains). It didn't get much better once I woke up (only slept about 2.5 hours), so I decided to skip joining my family for Thanksgiving and just get some rest and just be more comfortable at home. Kinda sucks because I look forward to seeing my extended family for Thanksgiving, and everything that goes along with it, but I figured it was the best decision for myself.

I'm going to start playing online again for the time being. Hopefully I can get back to Harrah's soon though. I go back to the doctor on the 3rd (Wednesday), so we'll see what he says.

Hope everyone had a great Thanksgiving!

Today kicks off Crohn's & UC Awareness Week!

Here are some awesome people living life with IBD:

http://www.ccfa.org/SomeoneYouKnow/

"You don't develop courage by being happy in your relationships everyday. You develop it by surviving difficult times and challenging adversity." -Epicurus

---
No real update just yet. Going back to the doc Wednesday, as I said previously, and just taking it day by day. I've been taking Immodium once every ~24 hours, seems to help some. Ready to feel comfortable with being more physically active. My gf is crushing CrossFit right now.

Had my doc appointment Wednesday. He said things seem to be on track, which is encouraging. He said it's really just a go-with-the-flow deal and to just stay patient. He was telling me about another guy who had the same surgery, and he's not having any issues 6 weeks out, not taking any meds. Just goes to show how different it is for everyone.

I've been seeing some improvement overall since Thanksgiving, but I'm trying to keep it in perspective. I picked up some peppermint oil capsules on Wednesday (I read in a lot of places that they can help IBS-like symptoms [diarrhea, etc.]), and I've been taking one about 30 min before each meal, along with Imodium about twice a day, and the Questran with each meal. I'll be even more encouraged if I can have another week or 2 like this.

I was able to put in a couple of poker sessions Thursday and Friday. Taking tonight off because I'm exhausted. I'm trying to value my sleep and health even more lately because there's been a flu outbreak recently here in Louisiana, and I haven't gotten a flu shot. Debating if I will get one Monday just to be safe, but from what I've read, this strain may be resistant to the vaccine.

Another monthly update. No drastic changes since the last post. I've been mostly feeling decent to good, usually being able to deal with any issues that arise, save for a few bad days/nights in the past month. I'm working on not eating anything real late at night, especially sweets, because I tend to be up for a while in the early morning, in and out of the bathroom, if I do.

Cash game results have been up and down the past few months, but I'm constantly working on my game, and I'm encouraged when I can put in some quality sessions, considering my situation. I've been in Biloxi the past 2 weekends for their series. I got 28/2331 last weekend in the 500k guarantee, losing a flip for 45-50 bbs when I busted. Got 5/45 in the HORSEament last night. I sold action for the main, but I wasn't able to play 1a today. I started feeling bad last night during the HORSE (chills, a bit achy, head pressure), so I just relaxed all day, got some more sleep, etc. Hoping to feel better tomorrow and play well for myself and my investors.

The extent of my exercise has mostly been a lot of walking. I tend to walk fairly fast naturally now (always used to walk slow as a teenager), so it's good exercise. I'll do some pushups, etc. every now and then, but nothing structured yet. I just don't feel too comfortable doing anything strenuous. I ran to the bathroom between hands the other day, and I felt fairly winded and kinda meh when I got back, so I know I'm not in the greatest shape. Main focus right now is to find a way to put on some weight by taking in more calories, which is challenging in itself.

As far as diet, I've been trying to keep it simple for the most part. On poker trips, I mostly just eat sandwiches. I've started eating yogurt nearly every morning for the probiotic benefits. Most things just seem inconsistent. I've had beer a couple times; one night it was fine, the other night was not so good. Same for other foods. It'll definitely take some time.

Hoping for continued improvements in the coming days, weeks, and months. I'm ready to be even closer to normal than I am currently.

I've been averaging a little over a mile walking everyday (that's just when I'm holding my phone). I seem to be up 1-2 lbs consistently over the past week or so. I've been drinking a protein shake daily, along with the morning yogurt, and some small snacks and small meals throughout the day. I'm hoping I can get up to 140 by the summer, in good weight, which will hopefully be a bit easier once I get into a consistent workout routine. For cardio, I suppose it's good the parking garage at Harrah's is so far from the poker room! I also did quite a bit of walking at the Beau.

Speaking of...I was able to play the 1b flight of the Main. I had a great 1b, running the starting 15k to ~62k. I ended day 2 with about 109k. I peaked around 140k on day 3, but ultimately busted in 11th. It was a great run and a lot of fun, my highest buy-in played, and only my second live main event played. The structure was oustanding (70/80 min levels). The field was a bit tougher than I expected once we got down to 36 and fewer players. And the final 2 tables had more southern pros than recreational players, but I suppose that's expected with such a good structure. It felt good to play with these guys and hold my own, a huge confidence boost for future events. My roommate took 2nd in the 1k and the main, capping off a great series for the both of us. Real excited for him.

From here on out, I'm hoping to keep the momentum from the Beau series and keep building my poker and life rolls. My girlfriend is set to graduate in May (which I'm sure I've said quite a few times in here), so I'm looking at that time period as a date to have $X amount saved up so I can support myself on my own once again, this time through poker.

I'm also hoping to carry over that same momentum to my various life aspects (health, physical, and general mental improvement). I've been playing some Civ V lately during my leisure time, pretty fun & strategic game.

I played extremely patient in the main at the Beau...so time to carry that over to life as well!

What's it do?

Two months since the last update. It feels like it's been a long two months...and a long 7.5 months since the surgery tbh.

My phone tells me I'm averaging 1.3 miles of walking per day. That's just general walking since I have no set exercise routine, so that's really not bad at all. I've been doing some body weight exercises off and on, nothing consistent, really just depends how I'm feeling and how the day is going. My weight has been really hard to maintain and has been steadily dropping. I'm around the 125 lb mark, give or take a few pounds for fluctuations.

My diet has been fairly good. I cheat and eat sweets sometimes, but I've slowed down a bunch with that. I'm eating fairly clean. Chicken, fish, boiled eggs, avocados, and peanut butter have been main staples, along with 1-2 cups of coffee per day in the last few weeks. I thought coffee would have more of a negative effect on my digestion (I thought it would speed things up), but I haven't noticed a huge difference. I mean, sometimes I do, but it hasn't been anything major.

Even though my diet has been clean, I still have issues with burning, sometimes going more often than I'd like, and off and on fairly painful cramps. I'm assuming I'll just have to give it more time. I felt bad and scheduled an appointment with my doc last week. As soon as I scheduled it, I felt good for about 8-9 days straight. A few days after I saw him is when I started to have more inconsistencies again. Pretty annoying, especially when things are painful. I'm not really sure what else to do in that department. I suppose I could always ask for something to help control the pain, but I always feel weird for asking for something like that. I don't want him to get the wrong idea. I've always had a high tolerance for pain too, and he knows that. He saw me get rid of the pain pump fairly quickly after the surgeries. But soreness from surgery and uncomfortable pain while in the bathroom are 2 different feelings imo.

One main issue I've been having is joint pain. It comes and goes; I guess you could call it flare ups. I had blood work done to check my inflammation markers, and everything was normal of course. I've been having a numbness/tingling/burning/painful feeling in my right hip. I have an appointment with a local orthopedic that I've worked with in the past while in school, so I'm looking forward to discussing it with him, seeing what he thinks, and going from there. The joint pain sucks especially at night when trying to sleep, and while putting in long poker sessions. I obviously get up and walk since I normally go to the bathroom a few times, or just get up to walk or stand in general, but it doesn't seem to help much. It's mostly my hips and lower back. Falling asleep can be difficult, and I sometimes wake up with a lot of pain in my hips. I'm hoping the ortho will have some answers for me and we can figure out a plan going forward, even if it means having something for the pain to help me sleep at night or get through long poker sessions or tournament days.

One thing no one really prepared me for was the mental aspect of all of this. I was somewhat prepared and learned on the fly about dealing with UC from my good friend who's had it for years. But the surgeries are a different beast in their own right. Having the bag took a while to get used to, but ultimately it felt great not having to deal with the pain of UC. Then, as the takedown surgery gets closer, I got very excited at the prospect of completely gaining my life back and being close to normal again (at least as close as I could get). But no one really tells you how long it can actually take, or about the issues I'm dealing with, how painful it can be to go to the bathroom, how irritated the skin on your bottom can get from the constant BMs and wiping. How much it'll burn when you eat something you shouldn't (or lately, just eating a pb&j sandwich for some reason), how you'll have to take a break again from your favorite foods, foods you were able to eat again with the ostomy bag.

There are days when I wish I could just be back with the ostomy bag, just to have a little relief again, or be able to eat everything I want to, or to be able to gain some weight again. Doc said that pretty much how I feel at the 2 year mark is how it'll most likely be for the rest of my life. I'm assuming that means I still have some room for improvement. I really hope so. I'm staying as patient as I can be, but it eventually just wears me down. Sure, poker has taught me to deal with variance, but dealing with health variance is a different animal. I'm basically just going to take things a day, week, and month at a time and keep reevaluating how I'm feeling. I hope it doesn't eventually come down to me having to make a decision on whether to stick with the pouch or go back to the ostomy bag, but it's something I'm keeping in the back of my mind, just in case.

I was (and still am) planning to update my blog soon, but writing all of this has helped out a lot. This was therapeutic, especially with the current poker roller coaster I'm on, and how blah tonight's session was. I'm sure one day I'll look back on this night, or this month or past few months, and chuckle to myself and think how silly I am. But for now, it's important to remain positive and focused.

You're keeping a good perspective about it all, wishing you the best man!

Yea that hip pain is the ****ing worst. Its hard to explain to other people our age but damn trying to sleep with any of that arthritic pain is just brutal. I can't imagine having the mental fortitude to deal with this plus put in good poker sessions.

Will you have to be on any long term meds once the surgeries are all said and done?

Thanks, I appreciate it.

Hopefully all of the surgeries are all done (assuming no complications and/or I don't go back to the ostomy bag). I'm currently on Lomotil, which is basically a prescription Imodium. I take it 2-4 times daily, just depending on how I'm feeling. It helps for the most part.

The last 2 months have been up and down, with both health and poker.

Health-wise, I've had some good days. I think I'm having more good/tolerable days than bad, which some great days mixed in, but I'm still not to the point where I wanna be. I wouldn't say I'm 100% happy with my quality of life just yet. My diet has been restricted lately, mostly so I don't run into any issues during sessions, but I'm really hoping I can start to expand it over the next few weeks, to an extent.

I'm ready to gain some weight that's for sure. I'm floating between 125 and 130 lbs. I'm doing my best to get in as many calories and as much protein into my system as I can daily, but it isn't always easy. Some days, it just isn't gonna happen, you know?

Poker has been up and down, especially since January. I went through a pretty brutal downswing for about 2 months where I was running absolutely terrible, and it was affecting my play. I had to take a step back and really focus on plugging some leaks. It continued some into the Nola Circuit events, where I didn't cash in a single mtt, running premiums into aces 4/6 tournaments. And if we count the 3 Biloxi bullets I fired, it's 5/9. Annoying, but it's a very, very small sample size. It annoys me because I only play a few tournaments all year.

Things started to pick back up towards the end of the circuit, mainly in cash. I've started to climb back up slowly, and I'm feeling better about my game overall. I've been working diligently on my fundamentals, going over hands, studying, and I've done some real good mental game work as well. I recently started meditating almost daily, and I'm beginning to make it a habit. Amazing the immediate effect it can have.

I also roomed with Ben (bob_124) during the Nola Circuit. We had a real nice set up at a friend's apartment, who was out of town for the time. I was spoiled with being able to get to the casino with a short walk.

I'm planning to head out to Las Vegas right at the end of June to play the Main Event the first weekend of July, if everything goes well with my health and nothing crazy happens with poker or anything else. I'm actually selling action, so in case anyone is interested, I'll cross-post it at the end of this entry.

Overall, I'm working daily on my outlook on life, staying as positive as possible, and putting in the work I need in order to have myself in the best position to succeed. Good things can happen with the proper preparation, that's for sure. Hopefully my health continues to improve, I can get in some more exercise, put on some more weight, and keep this thing going.

Positivity!

http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/18...-2-mu-1534404/

Health strikes back!

Things have been pretty meh as of late. So meh that I've decided it's best for me to skip Vegas this year, which means my Main Event debut will be pushed back by at least a year. But, there's always next year.

I talked with my doc about everything. I'm supposed to get a scope done on the pouch soon, hopefully he can fit me in this week. No prep, and I'll be under anesthesia, so I'm fine with that. I'm hoping for some clearer answers. I've had enough meh days lately that I'm seriously considering going back to the ostomy, either temporarily or permanently. There are some days where I just seriously can't take it anymore. 10 months out, I should be doing better than I currently am, and doc agrees. It sucks that the j pouch has given me trouble so far. My quality of life is just not where I want or need it to be right now. I feel like the ostomy could provide some relief at least.

Thinking back to the ostomy, I dunno why I was afraid to eat certain things. Compared to now, if I had the ostomy right this moment, I'd probably be binge eating so many foods that I've missed out on the past 10 months because of how it could/would affect my digestion. Frustrating, to say the least.

Poker has been fine, when I'm able to get in the hours. I've made good profit since the circuit while playing a limited amount of hours. I've stayed home some nights and just grinded tourneys online, which is a nice change of pace. I've really just been in a groove with my game lately, especially from a mental standpoint. I'm looking forward to getting healthy and getting back to playing more consistently, whether that means with a j pouch or an ostomy.

Exercise-wise, I'm sort of starting a routine, nothing serious. I'll do some upper body warmups just to get my back feeling loose. Then I'll do some pushups, planks, body weight squats, and calf raises. Nothing crazy. And I've been averaging a mile per day walking, just doing normal stuff, either around the house, grocery shopping, or walking to and from the parking garage/poker room at Harrah's.

Let's try something new, to hold myself even more accountable:

Goals:
Health!
Exercise daily, at least 1x daily
Meditate 2x daily
Study poker ~10-15 hours per week
Play as many hours as my body will allow me

I'll update after my scope, hopefully with some sort of news as to what's going on.

The scope came back normal, except for some swelling near the very end. He scheduled a CT scan for last Tuesday (a week ago today).

Got to the hospital 2 hours early to drink the contrast. When I get called to the back, I get a, "By the way, the radiologist ordered rectal contrast as well." -_- Cool, thanks for telling me ahead of time. I only fasted for 4 hours before this. If I had known, I would have gone low-residue/liquid the day before. So that was uncomfortable. My skin started giving me issues that afternoon after the procedure, after spending a good 30 min in the bathroom after the procedure. Ugh.

Today, I talked to my doctor about everything. He said there's a pocket of fluid behind my j pouch that could be contributing to my issues. I also have a little inflammation in the pouch (pouchitis), and there's the swelling in the anal canal.

What he wants to do is surgically remove the mucus lining of the anal canal and drain the pocket of fluid during surgery. He said I should be in the hospital for a day. As far as recovery, he said I should expect some pain with my bowel movements for a week to 10 days after the procedure. I should be expecting a call by Thursday evening to set up a date and time for the surgery.

He wants to go this route, thinking it'll help alleviate my issues, before going back to the ileo. He's been great throughout my entire process, so I trust his judgement. I plan to ask him what sort of pain I should be expecting (soreness because of the surgery, burning from the removal of the mucus lining, etc.) and if my BMs will be more frequent while I recover.

So, another surgery on the horizon. Hopefully this one solves everything going forward. If not, I may end up with the ostomy. I'm just ready to have a reasonably normal quality of life.

Rough break, though I hope it turns out to be a solution to the issue.

Thanks, hoping the same.

In a weird way, I'm glad something was found on the CT scan. At least there seems to be a reason as to why everything has been so inconsistent.

Surgery is scheduled for Tuesday, July 7th (no time given yet). Doc said we should know after a month if the surgery was successful.

I've actually been feeling pretty decent the past few days as far as how often I'm going to the bathroom. We'll see how the next week goes.

The timing of everything could add some stress. My girlfriend is currently job searching in the area, but so far, no luck. Hopefully something pans out though. She's also applied to a place in Vegas (where I have a doctor) and south Florida (where I don't have a doctor). Most likely, she should have something within the next 30-40 days. That, coupled with a potential move (either closer to New Orleans or out of state) make things a little tough.

I'm mostly focusing on reducing stress by meditating and exercising. And I plan to just get in as many live/online sessions as possible before the surgery so I can be prepared financially for a move.

Ready for some consistency; hopefully this will be the answer.

Been quite a while since my last post, and a lot has happened. I'll do my best to sum things up.

The surgery went well overall, but I still have some healing to do. He was able to do everything he needed, which was good. Things have been up and down since then. I've been able to expand my diet to foods that I wouldn't have felt comfortable eating before. And I've had some real good days. But there are also some bad days mixed in. The hardest part is not knowing how I "should" be feeling since everyone is so different with these procedures.

Things got pretty bad about a week ago, during the worst time for them to get bad (more details on that further down). I was in a lot of pain, having bad spasms, constipated, exhausted....not a good mixture. I talked with my doctor about it over the phone this past Monday, and he said he would fit me in for a sigmoidoscopy this past Wednesday. He's seriously the best. We ended up having a short conversation about the movie Reservoir Dogs just before I went under, so I decided to get him a Reservoir Dogs coffee mug:





It's the least I can do. He answers my texts almost 24/7 (I've stopped texting him late at night because he always answers), and he fits me in for appointments and procedures nearly everytime.

Anyways, the scope showed a mild stenosis (narrowing of the passageway). So he dilated it and gave me a dilator to use at home, which I haven't been able to use because I've been pretty sure since the procedure. Hopefully that changes soon, and I can get the ball rolling to see if this dilation process will work.

Back to my pain, etc. coming on at the worst possible time..

My girlfriend found a great job in the Gulfport, MS area near the beginning of July. So we spent a few weeks searching for a place in the area, finally settling on a place that fit all of our needs. We ended up moving in a week ago (I felt so useless half the time, but luckily her parents completely understand my situation) with the help of our families. We're both excited to start a new chapter. I'm currently playing full time at the Beau now, and I plan to head to New Orleans every now and then for sessions, probably when big events are in town or if I'm feeling well enough after a doc appointment. We're also about 15 minutes or so from the beach, close to shopping, good restaurants...it's a good situation overall. My heart was set on living in or near New Orleans, but I am completely satisfied with the current situation.

I had taken a lot of time off of poker since the surgery (3-4 weeks), and hadn't done a lot of studying, really focusing on my health. It took a little while for me to get some energy back, and for me to start feeling good again. But now I'm starting to get back into a routine of studying, meditating, and getting in sessions, either online or live.

We also had a crazy storm roll through the Gulf Coast area earlier when I was headed to the casino; I'll post some pics of that as well. I should post more pics to keep the thread exciting.

Til next time.

Here are a few storm pics I was able to safely snap:







It reminded me of those crazy storm cells that roll through the midwest, where it basically looks like a wall of clouds coming through. I'd never witnessed it previously.

hey man, nice update! Glad your gf found a job in the Gulf Coast area and that you're settling into the Biloxi poker scene. I've always liked the games there, esp at the Beau.

The Beau has some great games. The biggest difference between the Beau and Harrah's Nola is that in Nola, you have a much better chance of drunk tourists 7 days a week But the Beau has a very efficiently run room and an excellent staff. And it's nice having a much shorter drive to the casino each day!

Thanks for checking in man. Hoping we can catch up soon in some capacity.

Yah I enjoy the Beau, I've played there 5-10 times. I'll let you know if I head out that way this fall. Do the same if you're coming to Nola!

Next Tuesday, I'm getting a second opinion from a doctor back in my home town, by recommendation of my current doctor. The doctor I'm seeing used to work with him in New Orleans, but moved on to start his own practice. They keep in touch quite often and normally discuss cases and treatment options, so I feel as if I'll be in good hands. I'm looking forward to getting his thoughts on my situation and seeing if he has any other ideas going forward.

Things have been fairly inconsistent lately, health and poker-wise, which is a tad frustrating, but I'm doing my best to stay as positive as possible. I badly need to get back into a more consistent routine, so that's my goal this week.

I also had an idea lately to use Snapchat to raise awareness for IBD by chronicling a day of mine every so often. I've posted the idea in a few support groups I'm a part of, and I'm hoping the idea can catch on. If anyone is interested in following along with me, add me on Snapchat: j_anders21. I may start tomorrow, but if not, hopefully sometime this week. Hopefully the idea takes off and becomes something positive for the entire IBD community. While I may not have full-fledged IBD, I'm still having issues with my j-pouch that are somewhat similar. Having a j-pouch provides unique challenges on its own, and I won't ever forget about those suffering with IBD daily. Those people could use the support.

I saw a new doctor today (the one my surgeon recommended I get a 2nd opinion from). Super nice guy, I've been so fortunate so far to have great doctors working with me. He suggested trying an OTC steroid cream for my skin issues, and if that doesn't work, an oral steroid like Entocort. As far as frequency, he wants me to give a fiber supplement another shot and see if that helps me out. He told me a few days should be enough time to see how my body reacts. I also had blood work done so he can do his best to rule out Crohn's causing my issues (fingers crossed!).

He mentioned that I'm still relatively fresh for this type of surgery overall (13 months out!), and that he'd like to work with me for 6-7 months before completely giving up and having me go back to the ileostomy. I trust his opinion as much as I trust my surgeon's opinion, so I'm willing to give it some time and see if we can get this thing under control so I can live a "normal" life and get my livelihood back.

I also decided to do the previously mentioned Snapchat idea on Sunday, the day I took the drive back to my hometown. It was fun. I gave as much background info as I could without going overboard and boring people. A lot of people watched the entire thing, and I had friends and people from support groups add me. A couple people conversed with me, and overall, I feel as if it was a positive experience. I'm planning to do it again soon, and I have some ideas to expand it.

Edit: Today has been meh so far. It feels like the opening of the pouch is narrowed again because I've been feeling constipated since yesterday. Been on a mostly liquid diet of coffee, yogurt, Boost, and I cheated and ate 2 pieces of chocolate chip cookie cake because that's my fav. My diet lately hasn't been special; I feel as if it's narrowed. Really want to expand it and gain weight back. Was at 128 today though, which is a little more than usual.

I speak knowing pretty much nothing about what you need diet wise, but this fiber/protein supplement has been nothing but awesome for me:

http://www.amazon.com/Renew-Life-Ult...ultimate+shake

Just have to get past the terrible name.

Awesome, I'm going to strongly consider it. Can kill two birds with one stone since it contains a lot of protein as well. Did you notice any digestive changes when you first started taking it? I see it has a bit more fiber (I think) than Metamucil. I may ask my doctor what dosage he would recommend.

Thanks for the info.

I was taking psyllium and benefiber, but didnt really get much out of it.

I take one scoop a day and I pretty much have no issues, major slowdown/regulation. I have no idea if its just the soluble fiber (9g in one scoop!) or some combo of the other stuff in it, but its pretty much my nectar. Im currently off any digestive related meds too. Ill try not to oversell it too much, but it works incredibly well for me so far *knocks on wood*

All positives. Will probably talk myself into ordering tomorrow so I can start it by the weekend. Again, definitely appreciate the suggestion. If you don't mind me asking, are you taking it to assist with any digestive issues, or just purely as a supplement?