8-11

Squat 5's (TM 355):

wu Overhead Squat 8x45, 5x95
wu triple shoulder raises 8x5, 8x12, 8x15

Zercher Squats 8x135, 5x205
HBB Squats 5x230, 5x275, 5x305, 5x315 (RPE 10), 5x230
Round-back Chinups 3x8
NG Pullups 3x6
High Step-ups, 4x8, 2x5x+30, 2x2x+60
Power Cleans 3x95, 3x135, 3x155, 3x165, 3x175, 3x3x185 PR

First time doing power cleans for a while. Felt good.

I like your new thread title. I'm sure your views will go up!

Yeah I'm not sure what to make of that.

Where's the yoga teach pics? Why did you make this title, Holliday? Unsubscribe.

Oh, now I get it. Uh...no.

8-12

Hot yoga

8-13

Overhead Press 3's (195 TM):

wu Triple shoulder raises 12x5
wu Bent-over chicken wings 2x20
wu Overhead Squat 2x5x45
wu SOTTS Press 2x3x45
wu Hammer Curls 25x35
wu Curls 10x90, 10x100
wu 1-Arm Arnold Press 6x30, 5x40
wu Wide-grip Pullups ladder 1->6
wu Dips ladder 1->5

Wide-grip Overhead Press 6x95, 3x135, 3x155, 2x175, 2x175 (f3), 2x175, 9x135
Wide-grip Pullups 5x+30, 5x+60, 3x+75, 2x+75, 5x+30
Dips 5x+30, 8x+30

Bah, another lousy 45 minute session. Really not giving myself enough time to rest between sets. Also tried a wider grip today, similar to my current bench press. I don't think I liked it.

8-14

Hot yoga

8-15

Deadlift 3's (433 TM):

wu Overhead Squat 2x5x50
wu Hammer Curls 30x35
wu Curls 12x90
wu Round-Back Chinups ladder 1->5

1-Leg RDLs 2x8x135
RDLs 8x225
Deadlift 5x275, 3x315, 3x355, 3x390, 425f, 425f, 1x425 (f2)
Round-Back Chinups 3x10

Super-hurry session, flailing at 15 lbs below my PR from like a few weeks ago. Frustrating, but given the lousy couple of days I'll take it, and at least I got a rep.

Have you been managing to get some sessions in or are things a bit tough? Any progress pics of puss?

Just got back from wife's exhausting 3-day evaluation in Atlanta, and everything was a Murphy's Law poster leading up to it, actually including kitten pneumonia and wife having recurrent urinary infection. Kitten much better now though. Will try to get some pics today--she got big but her feet have finally healed so she's running and jumping everywhere like a little goofball (no offense, goofball).

In a week we'll find out if she'll get longer-term rehab there and what the schedule would be like. Is about a 7 hour drive for us.

UTIs are the worst. That's a big drive, you obviously must think they have something good to offer. Glad kitty is on the improve.

Feeling under the weather and been slammed with some wife stuff. Anyway, kitty pics:


Here she is checking in with pneumonia:




Now that her feet and abdomen have healed this is one of the rare times she's not flying somewhere (you can see her stomach fur growing back):




This is more of her usual screwball nature:

I think often of you and your wife. You definitely deserve good things. I don't know.... I do believe in karma and such and you have by now a stellar karma.

Awww the kitty is so cute but where are the HOT YOGA PICS?

You put a title like that up, you need to provide pics!!!!

Holliday I always think of you when I take a yoga class.

Awww, poor kitty

How did the evaluation go?

Holliday,

Won't be long now until you know what's happening with the rehab. I think sometimes it's the waiting that's hard, at least when you know what the situation is you can formulate a plan and get on with it. You look like you have the weight of the world on your shoulders and that's a tough spot to be in. I think you are an incredible person and your wife sounds like the type of lady who definitely deserves you. I don't pray so I can't do that but I'm sending some positive energy your way (hippie vibes ftw).

Your kitty is making me want one of my own! Must resist

Thanks guys (gals). Hope to hear today if the evaluation went "well enough" but it was pretty ****ing bad. Got through all the problems leading up to it but when the actual sessions arrived she just got very very angry at me to the point where she couldn't walk or hear anything. Angry about nothing except perceiving slights against her or the therapists or just that I'm an arrogant condescending ****head who everyone there is sick of within 5 minutes and needs a good lecture. She puts everything else aside to deeply concentrate on this lecture, and unloads on me whenever the therapist steps away for a minute. It's happened before but never this badly and the timing couldn't have been worse. She was fine physically and emotionally outside of the evaluation, which is unusual.

In the big picture it's just a reaction to the stress buildup and fatigue from the trip and not something she can well control, but hard not to take it personally and rather dispiriting after really having to kill myself to make the trip happen. For that matter you are watching therapists evaluate her without being able to see any of the progress she's made over the past year (which is a lot). Because she's so mad at you, remember.

Anyway I tried to talk her through it after the second day (a task meant for Sisyphus) and she did much better on the last day (the therapists were pretty shocked), but still far below her usual. They parted with a handy list of everything I've been doing wrong, not grating at all. I was a bit farther down than I usually allow myself for a few days afterward but...can't get hysterical at every setback.

Josie; It's on my "to do" list.

Hey sugar, Move it to the top of the list.

I know I am probably going to sound like a dick and truth be told I am one, so here goes.

Being a care-giver doesn't mean you have to take abuse. It doesn't. And you've been taking a lot of it for a long time.

Yes I know she has a brain injury. Yes I know you believe she can't control it. I also know you sometimes justify it by saying 'she's trying to push me away for myown good'. I'm telling you, this is outside the realm of being a care-giver and a husband for that matter. It's abuse. I'm also telling you that you need to prioritize this very big problem.

I think you need to bring this up with her therapists/doctors and most certainly TO HER. Something along the lines of "I'll be back when you can treat me like I deserve." and then walk away.

I mean it.

The ground won't open up and swallow you. Lightning will not strike you. This is not acceptable and isn't doing her any good either.

Now get on those hot yoga pics!

I have thought the same like VJ.

Even if I correct the story because it is told by Holliday and subconsciously we all try to paint us good, it remains not so cool behavior on your wife's site. I am far far far from suggesting something simplistic like ultimatum or walking away without thinking that all really through. But you need to face reality, and that is that her behavior is not OK and think about how you are gonna deal with it.


edit: and about control and so..... Look here around. There are a bunch of people here with mental health problems. And that is no less real than a brain surgery. Some of this people do remain nice and cool and a pleasure to interact with and some use this as an excuse to abuse anyone who is in their way. I don't want to criticize your wife. It is on you to think really well about the situation, to talk with professionals and decide what you are gonna do.

I actually think this is terrible advice. I can only imagine the stress your wife would go through if you said something like this to her and how it would fester in her mind and really worsen any insecurities she has. I do think speaking to her calmly at a later point and getting some advice from her health care team about strategies for the both of you to try and stop/lessen this happening is a good idea.

Brain injuries can **** with your impulse control and if your wife wasn't like this before the accident I doubt very much she is intentionally doing these things to you now and she probably feels pretty ****ty after the event for having done them and would be very keen to try and work on how to stop it from happening again. It sounds like stress builds up so it's overwhelming for her and verbally abusing you is her default release for it. She needs to find another way to release the pressure and I am sure this isn't uncommon for people in her situation so hopefully someone can give the both of you some good advice to minimise this.

I do think you need a break though. everyone has a breaking point and you are no good to your wife if you end up reaching yours. Is this rehab going to give you a break? If not I would think about other options, whether it is family or carers, to just have a break from everything and be a "selfish ****" and just focus on yourself for a little while. Even just a couple of days might refresh you. If you can't do this definitely go do some yoga/workout. You need it, it's not a luxury.

I'm sorry I meant stroke/brain tumour not accident. I'm a bit ditzy today due to lack of sleep.

Well did make it to the gym today at least.

8-30

Bench/Squat 5s (bridge day):

wu Bench Press 2x20x45, 12x95, 8x145
wu Hammer Curls 26x35
wu Overhead Squat 2x5x45, 5x75
wu Snatch 3x45, 3x75
wu Front Squat 5x135, 5x185

Bench Press 5x195, 5x225, 5x255, 5x225
HBB Squat 5x235, 5x275, 6x305, 5x275
Incline Dumbell Press (L5) 5x65, 5x75
1-Arm Arnold Press 5x35, 2x5x65
Pendlay Rows 12x135, 10x185
Rows 2x8x235
Power Cleans 2x3x135

Appreciate the well-meaning advice. Already addressing it, just frustrated by the horse/barn door situation. I mean, this was the ****ing time. Further frustrated that we did not hear back today. Lovely.

Rexx is correct, there's no way I could storm off or something. There are a lot of bad things that can happen very quickly--they sometimes happen on routine errand runs where nothing is wrong at all. I'm sorry, Rexx, but I got a good laugh out of your "break" idea. Yeah, sure, I'll just reach out to one of our insane or psychotic family members for help. Heh, heh, heh.

I think I wasn't clear. When I said walk away, I meant leave the room...not walk out of the house or leave her. Take yourself out of the abusive situation. Stop it in its tracks. I surely don't mean be hurtful to her but she has to know this is not acceptable.

Holliday, if roles were reversed and the husband was abusing the wife for a long period of time, do you think the wife leaving the room during abuse would be a horrid idea? Or would you think the poor abused wife is just as important as the ill husband?

I mention it because I care. And because you are just as important as your wife.

Holliday,

I'm glad I gave you a laugh at least. Laughter is good for the soul right? Really pleased you got a workout in!

oh, ok. That sort of thing does happen from time to time. It can't really happen in a rehab evaluation though.

Already nice and sore.

Whelp, she's in but at a reduced schedule to start. Good enough, and I'm sure she'll do well there once she gets acclimated. Details to be arranged.

I doubt it. If history is any indication, in fact, this rehab will mean *more* work for me. Then, when we leave...more work still.