Your mum sucks my slosh pipe.

Been lurking around for quite a bit, and decided that this was the thread for post #1.

1. Why do old men in the locker room constantly shave their face after a workout bare-assed?

2. New kid at the gym constantly wears some sort of baseball hat in a yamaka-like fashion, just sitting on the back part of his head. It looks ridiculous, yet I'm sort of impressed it stays there through his....curls...and...walking around doing nothing...

3. Guy on the bench today leans over and rips one that sounded like a frog belching. Shook his head a little, as if to say "Alright! Glad that's out of the way!" and began his set.

Is it possible to rack a hang clean too high? Saw a crossfitter get his elbows about 10 degrees over parallel, bar was like against his neck. I'm jealous obviously, but that's too much right?

Because they're old and don't give a **** what other people think.

that's called gangsta' tilt, yo'.

From my log:

Here's a GGO from work the other day: I'm dealing 1-2nl at like 3 in the morning and this reg is getting a massage. This guy is a younger kid who is really respectful and nice, but also kinda goofy looking and goofy in his demeanor. He's talking to the massage girl and telling her to rub his arms and lats because "You know the shake weight? Well I've been doing that three times a week, and my arms are burning!" I almost dropped the deck, but I bit my tongue and kept dealing. some people.

Hahaha, so not only is he readily admitting that he has purchased and used a shake weight, but he is trying to make it sound impressive to a female masseuse? Awesome.

i'm trying to think of what the poker equivalent of using the shake weight would be.

That gimmick device that lets your peek your hole cards.

Playing Play Money while jerking off a dude.

reading any hellmuth book?

the poor masseuse was like this guy cannot be serious, he totally was.

Lol, bro assisted/spotted leg press wtf

Tonight my gyms only rack was being put to good use by 3 guys doing upright rows. After a few sets at 115 they bumped the weight up to 135 broke out the wrist wraps and spotted each other. Their method for spotting was to have the spotter stand right behind the guy doing the lift with his arms around him and an underhand grip on the bar. Then the spotter would squat down as the bar was lowered and stand back up as he assisted with the row.

Group of random goth kids walk into the gym today. Three or four stand in a circle and throw medicine balls at each other. Like, not as an exercise, just for fun. Okay.

One goth steps up on the oly platform and...
...practices his devil sticks...for 10 minutes...

For those that don't know what devil sticks are (everyone), here is a sample:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6UjoUB9TK2Q

It was like that. Except not as good. And 100% more goth. If I had reason to use the oly platform, I'm not exactly sure what I would have said.

cant stand this one guy at my gym.

Ive spoke to some of the personal trainers and staff, nobody likes him. He comes in every day, does exactly 1 activity for an excessive amount of time, stares down chicks tops and talks with his 2 goonies where every other word out of his mouth is "f ur moms c"

The first interaction i had with him was when he was using the assisted chinup/dip machine.

The location of this machine is adjacent to the squat rack, which had some plates on it so i wasnt sure which one he was using, at the time he was closer to the squat rack staring at himself in the mirror.

I go up to change the weight on the machine and he goes im not done with that yet. Fine i head over to the free weights and do a bunch of curl excersises, this take me about 35 minutes. As i rest between sets i watch to see if he is done.

This guy is about 6'2'' maybe 190 and does sets of 10 pullups with 88 lbs assist. after he does this one set he will spend 15 minutes walking around the floor, texting and looking at himself in the mirror.

Fine i head to the non-assisted chinup and do a bunch of negatives, then lat pull downs then, about 10 minutes later he finally hits the locker room.

Fast forward to yesterday.

He is using the squat rack to pump his guns when i arrive. FML as i planning on doing legs this day (only 1 squat rack at my gym).

Had a network moment said to myself "im as mad as hell and im not going to take this anymore." he finishes up his set and begins his lap around the gym mirrors. i decide to head over there.

I throw on some 45's and get ready to do my first set. He comes up and says im not done yet.

Picture a 5'9'' white guy and a 6'2'' chinese guy

Hero: dont worry, by the time you finish looking at yourself in the mirror, ill be completely done with my 3 sets.
Villian: What does that mean?
Hero: did you not understand me?
Villian: f ur moms c you goddamn foreigner, i told you im not done.

At this point every single person in the gym comes over and listens to us argue

hero: i know. you work out for 3 minutes then spend 15 minutes looking at yourself in the mirror. In those 15 minutes i plan on using this machine. This does not interfere with your plan on using the machine. (here points over to freeweights) you havent looked at yourself in those mirrors yet, go over there while i finish my sets.

Villian: stupid c foreigner do you know who i am?
Me: is your dad li gang? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_dad_is_Li_Gang)

everybody in the gym laughs. He pushes me, i push him back and he trips over one of the plates he left out and falls to the ground. All the personal trainers get on him and take him out of the gym.

everybody claps for me.

My adrenaline is pumping so i add an extra 20 lbs to my squat and continue with my workout.

All you need to do is bang his girlfriend and you have yourself a karate kid movie!

I'm so non-confrontational in the gym (and irl too)... Would never get in that kind of argument. I guess I might make a sly "go do some curls in the mirror" remark if I was feeling particularly anoyed one day...

That was entertaining.

RTG, I cried a tear of joy.

meanwhile, in china.

what vid did cotton hill post? youtube is banned in china

i usually don't confront people in the gym, and they are all bigger than i am. just one of those days.

I've stopped trying to get these idiots to re-rack weights or to towel off a machine when they are done.