Dating/Relationship General Advice Thread - Volume 10 --Spring 2012 Edition - Page 80 - EDF Forum

BamBam192 · 08-12-2012, 03:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DcifrThs

nohands, seems obvious you're trying to find a justification to see her. put yourself in her fiance's shoes. then answer your questions.

this line pretty much says it all: "- I can't think of a reason not to see her other than "shes already engaged." (God that sounds bad)"

+1

I don't know what kind of standards you have nohands, but I would just leave her alone. She may be great and all, but obviously has some problems if she was in a relationship long enough to say "yes", and then starts actively looking for someone better.

Plus to get all emotional at a bar talking about personal problems with a guy she just met is also kind of weird.

Rubio · 08-12-2012, 03:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BamBam192

+1

I don't know what kind of standards you have nohands, but I would just leave her alone. She may be great and all, but obviously has some problems if she was in a relationship long enough to say "yes", and then starts actively looking for someone better.

Plus to get all emotional at a bar talking about personal problems with a guy she just met is also kind of weird.

+1

nohands · 08-12-2012, 04:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BamBam192

+1

I don't know what kind of standards you have nohands, but I would just leave her alone. She may be great and all, but obviously has some problems if she was in a relationship long enough to say "yes", and then starts actively looking for someone better.

Plus to get all emotional at a bar talking about personal problems with a guy she just met is also kind of weird.

i agree, she has issues and i keep going back and forth trying to determine if I am losing it or not. I know seeing her is wrong. But it gets hazy because I find myself rationalizing to make seeing her okay (like someone else mentioned). But your 100% right, but I may end up doing the wrong thing.

Deldar182 · 08-12-2012, 05:40 PM

Nohands,
Do you not think you can do better than this girl? Really? An engaged girl who starts crying to a random in a bar?

Consider this carefully.

BamBam192 · 08-12-2012, 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nohands

i agree, she has issues and i keep going back and forth trying to determine if I am losing it or not. I know seeing her is wrong. But it gets hazy because I find myself rationalizing to make seeing her okay (like someone else mentioned). But your 100% right, but I may end up doing the wrong thing.

Yeah, its definitely wrong, and trying to rationalize it as a good decision to see her is you going crazy. There is no way seeing her is a good thing. Lets just say you see her and hang out with her, think about what the outside perception is. If people get wind or what happens if someone she knows finds out and tells her soon to be husband? You are just opening up yourself to a **** storm of problems and issues you don't want.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deldar182

Nohands,
Do you not think you can do better than this girl? Really? An engaged girl who starts crying to a random in a bar?

Consider this carefully.

+1

Last place you are gonna find me is consoling a girl who is crying at a bar to me about her problems. Engaged or not

DcifrThs · 08-12-2012, 06:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stinkypete

putting yourself in fiance's shoes: he's engaged to a girl who has no respect for the engagement and is actively seeking something "someone who is a better fit". i'd say he's better off finding out now than later.

so let him find out. don't be complicit in it.

Fabian · 08-12-2012, 09:30 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by nohands

i agree, she has issues and i keep going back and forth trying to determine if I am losing it or not. I know seeing her is wrong. But it gets hazy because I find myself rationalizing to make seeing her okay (like someone else mentioned). But your 100% right, but I may end up doing the wrong thing.

A guy asking for advice, getting it, then ignoring it? I'm shocked.

LucidDream · 08-12-2012, 10:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Deldar182

Nohands,
Do you not think you can do better than this girl? Really? An engaged girl who starts crying to a random in a bar?

Consider this carefully.

The crying about being engaged is worse than actually being engaged imo and is more of the reason he should stay away.

thac · 08-12-2012, 10:58 PM

I agree with everyone about the nohands situation. Run far away.

nohands · 08-12-2012, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fabian

A guy asking for advice, getting it, then ignoring it? I'm shocked.

lol

nohands · 08-12-2012, 11:07 PM

ty everyone, i will be taking the suggested route. if anything changes I will give updates

nohands · 08-12-2012, 11:10 PM

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=skhxizRYxps

il_martilo · 08-12-2012, 11:28 PM

Nohands-- run and run fast.

This situation happened to a good friend of mine a few years ago (except he was the guy in this situation)... I knew the girl was crazy before they got engaged but what can you do other than support the guy right? Seriously, you want nothing to do with this.

Burdzthewurd · 08-13-2012, 12:12 AM

If you're the guy in this situation and you definitely CANNOT do better than that, like say you're a real life 4.5-5, is the advice here still the same for the sake of decency?

BamBam192 · 08-13-2012, 12:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Burdzthewurd

If you're the guy in this situation and you definitely CANNOT do better than that, like say you're a real life 4.5-5, is the advice here still the same for the sake of decency?

Yes, if you are a 4.5 - 5.0. Go buy a hooker, or get some intense game, or get rich. All three of those things don't involve getting it on with a engaged and most likely problematic woman.