Anger, Rage, not being able to control the emotions, nor the actions..
Playing hard since 2009, and being a 5 year looser, loosing about 100 per week or more online, on an average of about 5 to 8 thousand a year, 70-80% being bankroll management, in 2015 i decided to try to change all that.
Reteaching myself to play poker and sorta starting over using strategies from gripsed youtube vids, and also seeking a Coach, I managed to turn 100 into 700 bucks the right way, took 5 months, 4 tables on bovada.
0-250 .05
250-500 .10
500-1000 .25
took me about 5 tries to transition to the .25 blinds wrestling from 450 to 550 back and forth...
then it all came crumbling down in 1 day.
Mostly bad beats, 3-4 tilt mistakes and me not sticking with the bankroll plan, and im setting looking at my bankroll with 12$ left.
I feel like I've lost 5 months of my life here. I moved from Kentucky to West Virginia just to try to achieve this dream of mine.
I just need some advice, a success story or something.. has anyone struggled like I have? Anything will be appreciated and after feeling like ive lost 5 months of my life, yeah, I've learned my lesson...

peak times

What is your source of income? My best Advice would be get a good coach and start from There .

I work in the mines. Make about 1k a week

Sounds like you need to acquire a sense of apathy and get rid of the entitlement? Ie, when you pile all the chips in the middle good with further streets to come, don't give a **** on the run out

Sometimes to reduce stress and swings, a low ball approach can be wise but if you're exercising good bank roll management then it can feel like leaving money on the table by passing up on potentially thin edges - eg, check jamming a combo draw on the flop etc.

Sounds like you have a gambling problem.

Buy and read "The Mental Game of Poker" by Jared Tendler. Your problem clearly isn't your skill, it's your inability to control yourself. My non-expert opinion is that you suffer a lot from a combination of revenge tilt, and a lack of BR management.

You acknowledged before this year that you lost so much (70-80%) because of bad BR management and that you were going to change all that. This time you went busto because of bad BR management again, yet you say you've learned your lesson?

Sound like you haven't learned your lesson at all, and that you need to stop lying to yourself. Don't be a **** to yourself.

Thanks for the advice.
Never been a small ball player, just tried it out with great success... 1 hour, 2 .05, 1 .10 and a 1.10 full ring sng.. 1st in sng. doubled the .05 .10, and about $3 on the other .05 a total of $33. thats pretty good..
Funny thing is, thats the player type that i think i tilt on.. sorta looks like a LAG Fish playing against this type..

Only time will tell if i've learned my lesson. yesterday i went bust with the $12 and had 3 sng tickets. Today im at $80 with no deposits.

Whats a great strategy against this small ball type?

Just to clarify we're on the same page - it's when preflop aggressor checks the flop or turn with medium strength hands so they can have the ideal pot size going into river - ie, not exposing their stack and avoiding awkward spots.

When playing these villains, after they check behind, 2x pot the subsequent Street. Abuse until they start showing down nutted stuff when taking this coy line.