yea.
edit: why did it use a different name in the quote box?

Well I can't see how it would be good. Have you seen her yet since you were complaining of not seeing her for a long time?

Neutral imo. Keep on working for her tho.

no i wont see her till thursday or friday. she sent me a hand made birthday card and said she had a gift for me, ill be back at school wednesday and she is cooking me dinner on thursday or friday.

i was trying to read it as good because me and her arent technically seeing each other, but the fact that she isnt looking is because of me?

at this point i dont really see any way to define what our relationship is w/o talking about it depsite the fact that you guys say actions speak louder than words. dont think i will have that convo until after my birthday party on the 23rd though to make sure nothing is awkward b4 that.

also will be able to gauge a lot by finally seeing her again though, obv. i mean i dont think FWB or **** buddies cards and buy gifts imo.

this is good

guy posting on her wall is a creep, and she was just creep deflecting.

i wouldnt worry about it.

there is nothing better than letting loose a rage of ****s on 2+2

Actually this all rings true, I didn't see the right angle.

So...+1.

*cough*

oh right. I remember when responding to that post I originally had a time period in there, and I changed it to a little purposely. It depends situation to situation. Sometimes you have shown too much interest, been too clingy or simply need to let things settle. A little is whatever feels right given your situation. It could be a few hours or a few days or even a few weeks (probably not weeks, though).

i mean seriously who does that? that's so weird. and what guy is so helpless and desperate that he needs his friends to set him up with a girl via facebook wall posts? would that interaction and meeting be anything BUT super awkward? no need to worry here 99 % of the time (covering my ass in case this situation does **** you by some small one-in-a-million chance)

i mean yeah im at least 75% sure she is really into to me, having not seen her for a month though just has me doubting that, probably for no reason.



and yes, that is really freakin weird. especially given the fact that i assume by the "hey stranger" (though i dont know this) that they probably havent talked in awhile. of course you know her and she does tend to hang with a lot of sketch ppl, haha.

i never worried about it.

heres how i handle that:

meet on a tuesday, contact on thursday if she is the type to go out thursday, otherwise friday

meet on a thursday, contact friday or saturday evening (round 6 or 7) when everyone is forming a plan for the night

meet on friday, contact saturday if it was really clicking, otherwise probably send FB friend request sunday or something, wouldnt contact till tuesday if she would go out on a tuesday, otherwise thursday or fri (depending, again)

meet on saturday, same as friday.


none of this really matters probably, we just think it does. if the girl actually is interested she is gonna be receptive whenever, if she isnt then she wont be.


also, i always try to make sure i meet everyone the girl is with at whatever location that is so that i can invite her and her friends out so she feels comfortable.

what time was she texting you at? i got really drunk and things definitely got really weird at around 11 PM.

12:30

i could not stop lololololing and i tried to play dumb so she would tell me what was going on hahahaha

ok I have a quick question.

when I'm with girls who are on the scale of 1-6 I am very comfortable, confident, and cocky (but not like 'i'm better than you' cocky, moreso confident).

but when I'm with girls who are on the scale of 7-10 I seem to lose all that and get very uncomfortable and feel like they're superior to me. I would say I have average looks (maybe a 6/7 depends on the day).

is this normal or should i still act the same around the hotter women as I do around the uglier women? i think half the reason why I feel like this is because 50% of the women who are 7-10's do probably THINK they're better than me and could get better. but I think if I expressed the same personality to them as I do to the 1-6 girls, I could get more of the hotter ones.

i know lolz. i was probably acting like a creep, but i really dont blame myself given the situation.

cliffs for observers:

-get drunk together with girl
-girl makes certain moves/behavioral indications which i (apparently) misinterpret
-i, in my drunken, illogical state, act on these interpretations which, even if they WERE true, i shouldnt have acted on
-she reciprocates at first, but then shuts down
-things get weird
-she emo texts yeota about it
-yeota reveals the contents of all texts to me
-yeota and i lol a lot

Obviously this is normal, but it's subpar behavior. Work on your own confidence to correct it. Also, men rating themselves on an attractiveness scale is probably a mistake. Women don't view us that way except in limited circumstances.

Wow, new situation alert

Girl has a boyfriend, we're on the same course and lately have gone out for drinks a few times (with several other people though, as a group) and always ended up non-stop chatting and getting on really well. She's not bad lookswise, I'd go with a 7, but her personality increases that to like a 7.5.

However, her best mate is the girl I mentioned previously, who I have a date lined up with when she comes back to university in a few days.

But, this girl with the boyfriend always pops up to chat on facebook, begged me to come back to uni a day early, and as me, her, and a few of my flatmates were watching a film together last night, she rests her head on my shoulder and puts her legs across mine. After the film there's random banter and chatting and pillow fighting and she asks me if it's ok to hug another of the guys there, wtf? We had been drinking to be fair, but still a bit weird.

She went home, and I rang her when she got home because I said i would earlier for some reason. we both decide we're not tired, and I say she should come back up to watch another film (thinking that if she does, then ship it imo). She agreed straight away and came back (this is like 2.30am), stayed over (no secks) and we had a chat, she said her bf is at a different uni and theyre still together and it's going ok but she isnt sure if the ldr thing will work out.

Then tonight I accidently left her stranded in the SU bar, thinking she'd be with her flatmates when she said she was coming up to see me. I got sidetradked with mates by throwing snowballs at open windows lolz. She rings all like "where are you" and i'd left her stranded in the pub! my bad. we chat for a bit, and I walk her home, we're chatting and her flatmate says "remeber you've got a boyfriend" to her, as a joke. there's a standard awkward silence in which we look at each other, smile, and continue chatting and then I leave.

Personally, I'm thinking if it keeps going as it is I'd say I'm shipping it reasonably soon, amirite?

But if I was to do that, it removes any opportunity for dating her best friend, who is hotter, but whos personality I'm unsure of as we havent talked much.

agree with the start, disagree with the end. I live with a buncha girls and they never shut up about how hot boys are. It's obv not as important to then the way it is to us, but at the same time it's def important to them for the most part. that and shoes. get nice shoes.

decide which one you like. you probably already should have acted on the one with the bf if thats the route you choose.

maybe he's pretty friend zoned with the girl and wants to make his girl:guy ratio better at his parties?

yes but it's obviously easier said than done. everyone struggles with it.

I never said women don't care about attractiveness. They simply don't look at it as a "x is hotter than y who is hotter than z" scale constantly like we do. That may come into play at some points, but especially as women age into their mid-late 20s, attractiveness becomes more of an "is he attractive period" rather than an "is he more attractive than most guys."

Personality, intelligence, status and money can easily overcome any deficiencies in attractiveness assuming you have at least a modicum of attractiveness. The acceptable minimum level may differ from girl to girl, obviously.

At least this is my theory on all of it, and it's backed up by many others.

idk... ive never heard of this guy nor seen him anywhere so he definitely isnt in her circle of friends. for the the last 4+ months ive been with her every weekend and the guy hasnt been there so i would assume they havent spoken in awhile. the fact that A) he is saying i have a friend who you should meet and B) that he is saying that to HER is pretty weird.

i know i have never ever ever said anything like that or even thought of saying anything like that to any girl, let alone one i presumably havent spoken to in awhile, and definitely not on FB.

well one thing is a for sure. never acknowledge the fact your aware of who he is. obviously in this scenario so she doesn't know you look at her facebook, but also in general this is a good idea.

when a girl brings up a guy to their friends they look for acceptance. is he an acceptable bf/hookup. when a girl brings up a guy to another guy they look to see if he's a threat to the guy. if you barely acknowledge him and come off with an attitude that he's more like a little brother to her in your eyes then your successfully cockblocking him or at least attempting to without making it obvious.

yeah i get what youre saying... like i said this just came up in my news feed thing otherwise i never wouldve known (hence why i said i hate the news feed), i dont like stalk her facebook or anything.

You've got this in the bag. She obviously wants to drop her LDR. If you're looking for LTR then go with the reasonably attractive but better personality one IMO. If you're looking for FWB or something not very serious go with the more attractive one and just be friends with the other one.