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Old 11-01-2009, 12:39 PM   #76
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

ok that's all right. i actually really didn't wanna hang out with her. i also think there's a pretty good chance she already had a bf based on some evidence i saw. i just wanted a one night stand cause i could tell she would be a 10/10 at sex, cause she was the best ****ing grinder ever.

in fact i was just about to ask her to head back to my room when she said she said she was leaving with her friends
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Old 11-01-2009, 03:20 PM   #77
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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I am going to be honest with you. There are many different things that could have happened. 1) Her phone died so therefor she wasn't able to get your text. 2)Did show and just never saw each other. 3) She and friends decided to go to another party. So those are the 3 positive scenarios. But sadly there is a bad scenario. 4) She didn't respond on purpose. If this is the case I would say she is a lost cause. If she didn't respond then she is just not interested. My advice to you is to just leave it alone. Don't text her and just leave her alone. If she wants to talk to you and text you, she will do that. So sorry to say unless she talks or text you saying "sorry I didn't see you my phone or *insert another excuse*" she is a lost cause.
she just texted me and said "im terrible at texting people back when im blacked out. sorry."

having a text-convo now. too bad im terrible at saying cool things so shes gonna think im lame.
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Old 11-01-2009, 03:36 PM   #78
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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she just texted me and said "im terrible at texting people back when im blacked out. sorry."

having a text-convo now. too bad im terrible at saying cool things so shes gonna think im lame.

should of responded- "Yea im pretty bad at doing things when I african american out too"
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Old 11-01-2009, 05:19 PM   #79
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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she just texted me and said "im terrible at texting people back when im blacked out. sorry."

having a text-convo now. too bad im terrible at saying cool things so shes gonna think im lame.
Let me know how the text convo goes. Say something along the lines of "Haha its ok I was so messed up too."
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Old 11-01-2009, 05:30 PM   #80
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

coulda gone better, but really, i have no idea.
she ended up asking me something about class.
i had some good lines i guess.
its just frustrating not knowing what shes thinking.
like did she want to see me at the bar?
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Old 11-01-2009, 05:45 PM   #81
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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coulda gone better, but really, i have no idea.
she ended up asking me something about class.
i had some good lines i guess.
its just frustrating not knowing what shes thinking.
like did she want to see me at the bar?
Maybe yes maybe no. The problem with girls like her is you never really know. You need to either go balls to the wall and ask her out on a date or just leave it like it is.
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Old 11-01-2009, 07:21 PM   #82
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

from talking to friends, they have told me im expecting something way too fast and most times when there is potential, it involves games, texting, and not knowing anything about what is going on. they said this is normal.
i think it sucks.
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Old 11-01-2009, 07:52 PM   #83
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

^^ it does suck, thats why i have adopted a new method, the "i just dont give a **** method," being dry (other then flirting) is playing half the game, you cant give the women the upper hand, ie drop L bombs, or let her know that you are weak for her (even if you are).

Go with the flow, if you ask a girl to do something and they say no who cares, on to the next, its like multi tableing 1.75 18 mans on stars, if you bust you load up another one and forget about the last one
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Old 11-01-2009, 08:02 PM   #84
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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^^ it does suck, thats why i have adopted a new method, the "i just dont give a **** method," being dry (other then flirting) is playing half the game, you cant give the women the upper hand, ie drop L bombs, or let her know that you are weak for her (even if you are).

Go with the flow, if you ask a girl to do something and they say no who cares, on to the next, its like multi tableing 1.75 18 mans on stars, if you bust you load up another one and forget about the last one
love it
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Old 11-01-2009, 08:05 PM   #85
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

pretending to not care while actually caring, while increasing the number of girls you are going to involve yourself with just seems like way more frustration and emotional stress. Sure you might get a few more chicks in the long run but the cost is substantial. I say it's better to improve yourself. Guys who are big and strong and who are in the top social group get way more choice and way less frustration. feel free to disagree with this.
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Old 11-01-2009, 08:06 PM   #86
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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love it
and unlike poker, girls are getting easier, and will continue to get easier as you get older.... dont think this games gunna be dryin up any time soooon
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Old 11-01-2009, 09:31 PM   #87
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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^^ it does suck, thats why i have adopted a new method, the "i just dont give a **** method," being dry (other then flirting) is playing half the game, you cant give the women the upper hand, ie drop L bombs, or let her know that you are weak for her (even if you are).

Go with the flow, if you ask a girl to do something and they say no who cares, on to the next, its like multi tableing 1.75 18 mans on stars, if you bust you load up another one and forget about the last one
great post, man.
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Old 11-01-2009, 11:20 PM   #88
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

OP imo the chick is in to you, you just need to relax a bit about her. stop asking her to dinner and stuff constantly you need to not force it. you are in a good place here id bet that you can get with her this weekend.

maybe let her initiate once in awhile. instead of running up to her like a puppy as soon as class is over just leave next time. maybe she will text you saying something like "hey whyd you leave so fast", maybe she wont. if she doesnt who cares. you arent dating yet. thats the mentality you need to have.

also, rather than try to get her in dating situations all the time like dinner/movie, try to get her in social situations with other people and eventually isolate her.

you are doing well though, from what you describe she is into you and as long as you dont go desperate stalker you are money.
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Old 11-01-2009, 11:39 PM   #89
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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OP imo the chick is in to you, you just need to relax a bit about her. stop asking her to dinner and stuff constantly you need to not force it. you are in a good place here id bet that you can get with her this weekend.

maybe let her initiate once in awhile. instead of running up to her like a puppy as soon as class is over just leave next time. maybe she will text you saying something like "hey whyd you leave so fast", maybe she wont. if she doesnt who cares. you arent dating yet. thats the mentality you need to have.

also, rather than try to get her in dating situations all the time like dinner/movie, try to get her in social situations with other people and eventually isolate her.

you are doing well though, from what you describe she is into you and as long as you dont go desperate stalker you are money.

I agree with this completly. There are two lines with girls: 1. You're looking for a relationship. 2: You're looking for a "one night stand"/hookup.

It's cool to rush things with the 2nd one cause if it fails who cares. But if you are looking to date this girl you need patience. And even when you do start hooking up it'll prob be a few months before you are official anyway (as other posters said there is always that "we're together/exclusive" stage.)

But with that said get to know her a bit. Try to hang out with her more, casually not like 5 star resteruant official date with flowers and wine. And if you are nervous about making a move do it drunk, always excusible.
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Old 11-01-2009, 11:51 PM   #90
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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OP imo the chick is in to you, you just need to relax a bit about her. stop asking her to dinner and stuff constantly you need to not force it. you are in a good place here id bet that you can get with her this weekend.

maybe let her initiate once in awhile. instead of running up to her like a puppy as soon as class is over just leave next time. maybe she will text you saying something like "hey whyd you leave so fast", maybe she wont. if she doesnt who cares. you arent dating yet. thats the mentality you need to have.

also, rather than try to get her in dating situations all the time like dinner/movie, try to get her in social situations with other people and eventually isolate her.

you are doing well though, from what you describe she is into you and as long as you dont go desperate stalker you are money.
i only asked her to go to lunch once, not really sure where this dinner/movie stuff youre talking about happened. but besides that, i really gotta say it makes sense. maybe i will play games or whatever and do the ignore her thing. i can see that backfiring because like i said, shes a shy girl (i think). however since she did text me today, who knows.
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Old 11-02-2009, 12:03 AM   #91
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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Posting here instead of EDF because they don't understand situations about people younger than 35.

So I met a girl at a party last night (European Pop Star costume ftw) and she's absolutely adorable. We're talking for a bit initially and having a great time, when one of my good mates comes and cockblocks me on purpose. (He later tells me he's been trying to set something up with her even though he has a gf).

Well **** that. So I "accidentally" run into her when I go to get another drink. We start talking again and it goes fantastic. Other than not being foreign she's got just about everything else. As the party winds down a little she asks me for my number which I'm tempted to snapcall but play it cool.

So here's my question. Since she's not really connected to my group of friends I'd rather do something other than "hey are you going to XYZ's tonight? cool see you there". I have two lines

(1) Just bring her to some party
(2) Do something else

Frankly I'd rather do something else. She's also a musician (although not the like emo/weird type fortunately) so if there were any decent concerts coming up that would be the clear answer. Would asking her if she wants to play together some time be weird?
UPDATE

Ran into the girl saturday night at the party I was at. I was actually hoping not to run into her to let things cool off a bit and hit on other girls. Obv I wasn't going pedal to the metal two nights in a row so we talked for 10-15 minutes which went fine and I talked to other girls/she talked to other guys. When she was leaving she came for a hug so I said "I'll call you later this week yeah?" and she smiled and said sure.

So my question-- Since music is our common ground it makes the most sense for us to hang out based on that. But I've got two problems.

(1) Absolutely no good concerts this week. Last week would have been perfect but there are none this week so this is out.
(2) I can't find a non-awkward sounding way of phrasing the idea of "do you want to come over and jam?" Jam is a word you use with guys, not girls... it implies bro-ing out which is NOT my intent. If anyone has a way of suggesting the idea that we hang out at my place with me, her, and two guitars I'd be very grateful. Ordinarily I'd just be like "hey maybe I could give you a lesson" but she actually knows what she's doing .

But other than that everything is great. Ideas? Or should I try to save that for later and take another line.
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Old 11-02-2009, 12:09 AM   #92
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

you could text/call and be like "ive been working on some new stuff, come bang me".
or something like that.
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Old 11-02-2009, 12:25 AM   #93
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

just because music is a common ground doesnt mean you have to get together to play music. id try to get her somewhere else casual and then have her come over to jam or whatever you want to do.

OP- yeah oops about the eating thing i mixed you up with the im in love guy
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Old 11-02-2009, 10:34 AM   #94
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

So I met this exchange student last Friday and got her number so we had on-and-off text-communication since. Last night I basically sent her a "You wanna do something later?etc"-message and I got a "Maybe " Answer. So I was like o.k. I'll give her a couple of examples.
And then I get this "Just tell me when u have any suggestions or plans " answer. Wtf does that mean? I just gave examples. Nothing specific, but examples nonetheless!

So I answered with a "Sounds good-etc." message, which now in hindsight was a bit meh but w/e.

So, next move?
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Old 11-02-2009, 10:39 AM   #95
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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So I met this exchange student last Friday and got her number so we had on-and-off text-communication since. Last night I basically sent her a "You wanna do something later?etc"-message and I got a "Maybe " Answer. So I was like o.k. I'll give her a couple of examples.
And then I get this "Just tell me when u have any suggestions or plans " answer. Wtf does that mean? I just gave examples. Nothing specific, but examples nonetheless!

So I answered with a "Sounds good-etc." message, which now in hindsight was a bit meh but w/e.

So, next move?
What is her nationallity? That could be an issue, if she is not the best at english or you used slang then she could have been confused. Just out of curiosity what were your examples? Also maybe she was trying to be funny lol.
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Old 11-02-2009, 10:42 AM   #96
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

Okay, I'm actually stuck for what to do to progress a relationship. This girl that I liked all of last year had arranged to split up with her long term boyfriend last summer, but I think she didn't completely manage it, I'm not entirely sure about that so do I need to ask her about that before I try anything?
I've known her some time now, so I may be in the friend zone, but I think she knows I like her, haven't explicitly told her that though but she may be giving me a few signals that she may be interested, although I could be exaggerating them in my head. Latest example is a halloween house party where I was sitting in a corner chatting to a friend and then she came and sat next to me, when the friend wandered off we chatted for at least half an hour mostly discussing other peoples relationships and gossip about mutual friends, but with some flirting too until everyone left and I walked my housemate home.

Is my play just to lay it out there one night after we've both had a few drinks and see her reaction or is there a better way?
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Old 11-02-2009, 10:42 AM   #97
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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UPDATE

Ran into the girl saturday night at the party I was at. I was actually hoping not to run into her to let things cool off a bit and hit on other girls. Obv I wasn't going pedal to the metal two nights in a row so we talked for 10-15 minutes which went fine and I talked to other girls/she talked to other guys. When she was leaving she came for a hug so I said "I'll call you later this week yeah?" and she smiled and said sure.

So my question-- Since music is our common ground it makes the most sense for us to hang out based on that. But I've got two problems.

(1) Absolutely no good concerts this week. Last week would have been perfect but there are none this week so this is out.
(2) I can't find a non-awkward sounding way of phrasing the idea of "do you want to come over and jam?" Jam is a word you use with guys, not girls... it implies bro-ing out which is NOT my intent. If anyone has a way of suggesting the idea that we hang out at my place with me, her, and two guitars I'd be very grateful. Ordinarily I'd just be like "hey maybe I could give you a lesson" but she actually knows what she's doing .

But other than that everything is great. Ideas? Or should I try to save that for later and take another line.
Finding common ground is the best way to do this. So you found common ground. I say you ask her to do something and then jam. But definitely use the "we both love music" to segway (spelling?) into getting to know her better.
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Old 11-02-2009, 10:58 AM   #98
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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Okay, I'm actually stuck for what to do to progress a relationship. This girl that I liked all of last year had arranged to split up with her long term boyfriend last summer, but I think she didn't completely manage it, I'm not entirely sure about that so do I need to ask her about that before I try anything?
I've known her some time now, so I may be in the friend zone, but I think she knows I like her, haven't explicitly told her that though but she may be giving me a few signals that she may be interested, although I could be exaggerating them in my head. Latest example is a halloween house party where I was sitting in a corner chatting to a friend and then she came and sat next to me, when the friend wandered off we chatted for at least half an hour mostly discussing other peoples relationships and gossip about mutual friends, but with some flirting too until everyone left and I walked my housemate home.

Is my play just to lay it out there one night after we've both had a few drinks and see her reaction or is there a better way?
Ok well to give you a clear idea on what to do some questions must be answered. 1) Does she ever talked about her bf/ex bf. 2) Did she hang out with him on halloween or go to the parties with him. If the answer to both of those questions is "no" then chances are 85% that she does not have a bf. I think her coming over and chatting with you until you leave is definitely a sign of liking you. I think the whole asking while drinking this depends on you and her. Is she the type that likes for someone to come out and say "Look I like you, your amazing, etc, date me"? If so then no go on the drinking thing, just tell her when you guys are flirting one day. But if she is the type that well it really doesn't matter then yes go for the drinking thing. Make sure you have had only a half a drink or so. You want to come off sincer and genuine, because coming off sincer and genuine is the key to making it a success. Also make sure she is not plastered, you want to make sure she remembers lol. After the stage is set, make your move. Talk to her and wait for the moment. Now the moment...well you know after I explain it. When you start flirting and you get her to laugh and she pauses to take a breathe look at her straight in the eyes and then give her a big smile, and then boooom say your thing. If all goes well you will end the night making out and with the girl you want.

Also add some smooth remarks, you know. This is a crappy example but you will get the picture.
Her: I think I am going to go on a diet
You: Uhhhh why?
Her: I am getting fat
You: *laugh* are you serious? You are to perfect to be going on a diet

A thing to remember is girls like witty, funny, smooth, and nice guys. So it seems like you got the smooth, funny, and nice down. You just need the witty.
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Old 11-02-2009, 11:07 AM   #99
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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What is her nationallity? That could be an issue, if she is not the best at english or you used slang then she could have been confused. Just out of curiosity what were your examples? Also maybe she was trying to be funny lol.
Thanks for the reply. She's European and her country was under the Soviet banner until 1990 when it collapsed and has been free since, so, yeah, her understanding of english is good but not great. I tried to be quite articulate and didn't use any v. tough words.
My examples were go for a walk, café and just partying (i.e. meet up next time we're out.).

My main concern is that I gave examples, then got a 'hit me up when u got examples lol' answer right back.

More help please
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Old 11-02-2009, 11:21 AM   #100
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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Thanks for the reply. She's European and her country was under the Soviet banner until 1990 when it collapsed and has been free since, so, yeah, her understanding of english is good but not great. I tried to be quite articulate and didn't use any v. tough words.
My examples were go for a walk, café and just partying (i.e. meet up next time we're out.).

My main concern is that I gave examples, then got a 'hit me up when u got examples lol' answer right back.

More help please
Well if I was you I would reply back "haha did you not get my examples, or did you think they were sucked?". Its not a big deal, she was either being serious or funny. So just ask to find out. No real secret or smooth way to get your answer for this one. Sometimes with cell phones things like this are hard, because she might have sent the text before you actually sent yours, but it got delayed due to signal or connection between her phone to the tower. So also could have just not seen it and replied, trust me I know, but sometimes woman just don't understand that when their phone rings and their is an envelope that says text message on their phone that it means they have a new text. No sarcasm by the way I know girls like that.
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