can it be said that if a girl admits she wont hang out with you because she has a boyfriend, then shes making it clear that she has interest, but has a bf in the way?

also, i totally owned in class today.

i think that the girl mentioning she has a boyfriend at all tends to mean that she doesn't have interest

PM Rekrul

This is so horribly wrong. In fact, I'd wager the more she mentions it, the more interested she is.

Edit - unless you are being a creeper and she just wants you to go away. But if that is coupled with other indicators of interest it can generally be a sign of a struggle she's having.

Cheers for the advice guys.

I believe I blew up last night though. Nothing really happened in the night out; I made a point of saying hello to other mates of her group before her which she didn't like (heh) but generally just tried to avoid her and have a good time.
Then I give her a call when I get home (this is a standard thing between me and her) we chat a bit and I can't remember what led to it but I tell her to "get over herself a bit". She hangs up. I text her to tell her that she needs to get over herself, grow up, and stop getting high on some drunken stuff I said to her.

I'm pretty sure any option of taking things further is now over. But as you guys have said, it's hardly a big deal as I don't really want a girl like that anyway. I'll probably make a half-arsed apology just to make sure we're friendly (we have a lot of mutual friends), but won't bother with her any more.

ok wtf just happened

edit: PMing this Rekrul guy, hoping his a guru

**** it. Don't apologize. Just make things "cool."

Some chicks are really crazy man. Don't let em get to you. I almost let this happen to me recently.

meh sent a drunk text last night w/o a response sdlkjgnsidjfmejnmpsf

I did some stupid drunk texting with a girl last night too. I also did some equally dumb hungover texting with her this morning. Just make fun of yourself. Don't try to stumble and save face. Make it look like you don't care.

And yes, I decided to give you another chance ;-).

Lol i feel like drunk texting hurt my chances with the last girl i liked. She was joining a sorority so we didnt hang out too much and I typically drunk texted really bad things, even to the point saying i want to go out with her and date her. She obv said we had to hang out more lol and i try to level things later saying i can get any girl i want and she should feel special i like her (or similar to that). This was an epic fail and now she's seeing a kid i know that joined the frat i was going to join (kinda friends with him i guess). This was the definition of epic fail and i blame it on drunk texting and my own mind levling-games bc i know you shouldnt tell a girl you like her a lot bc they that freaks them out. also i never texted her bc im a pussy and she always texted me (which was a sign imo she liked me).

paragraphs

use them

the funniest thing about my drunk text was it was at 10:08pm.
10 ***** 08. i was hammered.
she of course, has no clue i was that drunk at 10:08 and probably thought it was really weird.

i texted her this morning and did the basic i was drunk my bad text. no response ftw.

Yeah, don't do that. That just makes it worse.

wat u think best way to approach then? is it best to just let it be? wouldnt that jst make it awkward, when u next talk to them. i try to send my drunken texts with the qualifier that 'im drunk atm' but then again guess cant be that drunk if remember to do it.

maybe it doesnt make it better, but i donno if it necessarily makes it worse

Just play it off like a joke. Act like you don't care. Make fun of yourself. Whatever you do don't appear subservient and apologetic.

I mean unless you said something truly awful or offensive, but you were ****ed either way at that point.

It's a **** test. PUAs call it **** tests. They also act like it's something they made up, but they didn't.

Women will push you to see if you'll stand strong and not bend, or if you'll get apologetic and weak.

Happened to me today. Example:

Texted a girl something minorly offensive to her. Was trying to do the whole backhanded compliment thing. What I did was fine.

Got a defensive text back from her, replied poking even more fun.

Got this text "You could be nicer, you know." Most guys would reply "Oh I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I offended you."

My reply? "Maybe, but that's not much fun, is it?"

Here's what I got back: "Yeah, I guess you are right."

It works. Trust me. Now don't cross the line or say something patently offensive or horrible... at that point you probably have to give a legitimate apology. But if it was something innocent and stupid, then who cares?

The structure of my last post was awful. I hope everyone can read and understand it.

Also, if you are having trouble getting no responsed by a girl in a text conversation and want to keep it going (and often you will need to keep it going if you are still building interest), try to leave your texts open ended and asking for a reply.

Example:

"Yeah, I really don't like cheese."

compared to

"Yeah, cheese is awful, am I right?"

Honestly, stay away from texts if you can, but a lot of girls these days favor that medium over anything else. Plus it can help avoid awkward silences if you are not a good phone talker.

Rekrul has been living in Seoul for (I think) 6 years now. So he has a whole bunch of experience with Korean girls.

This thread just conjures up terrible memories for me.

I'm at the point now where I'm just gonna stop girls in the middle of the street and blatanty say to them "hey, you're a very beautiful girl, I'd love to take you out on a date sometime. Can I get your number?" Because nothing else works.

haha lol mate cant tell u how many times have contemplated that, but unfortunately my balls were nowhere to be found at the time. give us a TR if ya get around to it. it may inspire others to follow in ya footsteps

sigh

being in a frat obviously gives you access to a huge amount of hot girls, but the world is just so small sometimes, if that makes sense...

/4am emo post

Don't be emo. I know how it feels, but this pity party attitude won't help you.

Find out what you aren't doing right, improve yourself, gain some confidence and go back out there. Realize you are young and it is meaningless if things fail with girl X, just move on to girl Y. Stop getting attached to girls before you even know them. Stop staying in every Friday or Saturday or not approaching women. Just do it. You have nothing to lose.

Yea it makes them feel less guilty for having feelings....She can be like, well I told him I have a boyfriend so I am not at fault..or whatever they like to do to rationalize stuff in their heads.......If she mentions having a boyfriend without you even showing any interest in knowing than that is usually a very bad sign...Like in the following conversation:

You: "Hey Whats your name?"

Her: " Amy and my boyfriends name is Mike"

or maybe something like

"Do you know where the keg is"

Her: "I dunno prob near my boyfriend mike"

than you are prob a creeper

its more like she was trying to hide the fact she had a bf.
it was all like flirty mcflirt flirt but not hanging out and not giving a reason.
go to class and flirt again.
took a lot of prying for her to admit she had a bf, then she said she wont hang out with me cause he exists and she doesnt want to "make him sad".
my new goal is obv to crack her (no pun intended ldo)

a couple diff girls have invited me to performances they're in or hosting (eg plays, concerts, student club parties etc)

does it make me seem of low value if I attend and seem like i'm just sucking up to them, or does it really impress them and make it seem like i care a lot about them as a friend