Wsop,

It has been mentioned in a couple of responses, but want to reiterate the point re: expected earning growth.

If you are a teacher who will start at $40k and in 15 years maybe be making $80k, you need to start saving ASAP.

If you are a software developer who will be making $80k and in 5 years be making $150k, you can ignore saving now.

And if you're a banker, lawyer, doctor making $100-something now and $250k+ in your thirties, then you can wait even longer.

There's a subreddit called financialindependence, I think, all about retiring early. Well technically it's about making enough passive income to live off of, where some people don't want to work.

Some of these people do some crazy ass ****. Saw a story of a dude who makes like 80k a year and lived in his van for two years saying about 40k a year into the market.

Speaking of ****, my buddy from work and I are going to start working on our startup tonight. A few other peeps at work have said it's a pretty great idea, in a non facetious way.

So in before I am a millionaire.

Semi related:

http://imgur.com/gallery/yoH7Kbe

Some interesting ones, a decent amount of good/obv advice, and some loltastic ones.

Wsop,

Forgot to include the most important case in my post.

If you're a grad student, postdoc, resident, apprentice, or any kind of training role where once you finish you'll be making a large multiple of what you're making, spend all your money now.

Thanks, this makes sense. The other responses where interesting too, wasn't expecting this big of a discussion.

Know a guy who did this,lived like a homeless guy on speed,putting all his money in the market.

He did retire after the bubble burst on junk bonds.

Ate a bunch of rat poison.

The only thing that really needs to be liquid is your emergency fund. That should consist of 3-12 months worth of expenses depending on personal context and preference.

Dividend Growth Investing is what most people do for early retirement, reason being they invest in companies that pay and raise there dividend every year (majority have done for 25+ years). Once they decide to retire they'll not only have there portfolio worth $x but it'll also produce $x per year. Combined with an employer matched pension fund it's a really solid approach.

Personally i think retiring young seems great in theory but if u arent living a certain way after i think it would suck (subjective tho ofc). Would be nice to work full time and have the same portfolio producing $x/year tho, would be a great financial situation.

I don't think that's true. It's just that if it DOES implode, it doesn't really matter where you have your savings as they'll fail anyway.

If I won the lottery I wouldn't retire. Retiring early sounds very boring to me.

Anyone?

Also, I am grateful for all tips and opinions I get from here. And even if I dont respond to everybody that responds to me I am reading it and taking it into consideration.

DanteA where do you live in Sweden? 1.5h is too far away to do anything with her. Try practicing cheekiness and vastly reduce your radius.

In the souther parts close to Jönköping if that tells you anything. It's 3 hrs to Sthlm, 2 hours to Gothenburg and 3 hours to Malmö.

So buying dinner is out of the question?

Yeah I know where it is, it is a bit rural but still no 1.5h radius rural.

Buying dinner is out of the question unless she is willing to travel/to bang when you travel to her.

Even rural your radius shouldn't be more than 20-30 miles max.

You just need to meet a bunch of girls and get laid a few times at minimum...the way you think about girls is ****ing you more than anything else. Move to a big city if at all possible and meet lots of people.

You meet a girl on Tinder, chat a bit, she lives 90 mins away...and based on only that you're ready for casual sex or a relationship? You're super thirsty to be with a girl, any girl that will have you. Go meet a lot of girls and build your confidence so you can stop being such a needy guy, it's really unattractive.

Im not a needy guy outwards, at least I think so.

At the moment it's not easy for me to move to a bigger city, but I have plenty of matches on Tinder so I hope I can get some experience that way. Most matches is within a 30 min area.

You're from Sweden?

Ill see how this conversation develops before I draw any conclusions.

Yeah +1 to lucid

really?? this is just from a couple pages ago




Being needy means you're afraid to lose what little attention you do get from her. You want this girl so bad, but you're so scared she won't be attracted to you back that you don't want to tell her bc the little bit of platonic attention she gives you, she now might take away....that's needy dude. The only way you will ever get a girl you want is to risk rejection, put it out there that you like her, not by asking her how she feels about you, but by telling/showing her how you feel about her while giving her space to either reciprocate or reject you. The better you get at handling rejection while still feeling good about who you are as a man, the better your results with women will be.

Thats a good post. Thank you

Dante - getting her number should be easy. Definitely do that.

Regarding making plans - 1.5h does suck but it'll just take some planning. Going there for a 1 hr long dinner date and leaving is silly. Either make a plan to do a few things to make it a longer date, meet her half way for a shorter date, or make it open to whoever visits to stay over that night.

How to be attractive to women(has nothing to do with physical looks, however if you aren't that physically attractive...do something about that ****. Go to the gym, get a stylist, etc. Maximize your physical appearance as much as you can based on what you have to work with, it shows confidence and that you care about your appearance and are aware and able to take feedback from the world which in and of itself is attractive)

Forgive any poor spelling/grammar....I'm basically just spewing a bunch of thoughts that have been in my head lately on the topic.



Here are some things to focus on in terms of improving your skills with women and what makes you attractive/unattractive to women. Understanding these things and working to improve on them will massively improve your results and make you a much happier person.

These are things I've learned through mentoring and trial and error over the years with not only women but life success in general. Being the Ask a Girl Out thread I will go into details about what being a successful, attractive man looks like relating to women but much of this can be applied to anything in life.

Life is about relationships, your relationship not only to everyone and everything but your relationship to tension as well. Tension is everywhere in life, it's mostly emotional and physical tension. You can make an argument for mental tension but that is mostly your thoughts creating an emotional or physical response in your body so I will just keep it to the first 2 mentioned. Your relationship with tension, how much you can handle, is directly correlated with your ability to be successful in whatever area of life you are stepping into or avoiding that tension.

For the purpose of being successful and attractive to women I will mostly talk about emotional tension, however this can lead to physical tension in your body(poor body language) so I will discuss both. Weight lifting, sports, manual labor, yoga, etc all involve physical tension and give you greater awareness of your body and make you more aware of how you feel in your body, whereas sitting at a desk all day trading stocks puts you in your head and you spend most of the day thinking which in turn leaves you out of touch with your body. The more in your body you are, and comfortable in your body, the more attractive you are to women....however this is multifaceted and brings me to emotional tension.

Emotional tension is the feeling of awkwarness or heaviness that a certain situation or event seems to have(that might not be the best way to put it but will make the most sense to people I think if they aren't already consciously aware of the various emotions that rise and fall in their body). Some situations are more awkward or heavy feeling emotionally than other, these are very emotionally tense situations. All physical tension will have a certain level of emotional tension built into it an vice versa. Imagine something is really awkward and you feel very uncomfortable in that situation, now how does your body react to that? You become more insecure, more closed off to the world, more withdrawn, more inwardly focused on yourself rather than what is happening around you....you're overall awareness retracts rather than expands. When you are able to relax into this your awareness will expand.

Women are very emotional creatures, they love feeling different emotions and are very loyal to their emotions generally speaking. Men, generally speaking aren't in touch with their emotions and often retreat to being logical/thinking to escape the emotions rising and falling in their body(some men might be OK with the tension that arises and sitting in it but they refuse to feel the emotion and again, to avoid this they retreat to thought and logic). The emotions are still there but we retreat from being consciously aware of them to only being consciously aware of our thoughts. However, we are still subconsciously aware of these emotions and they will subconsciously drive our actions because of this(have you ever done something that goes against what you consciously decided already that you would do and basically sabotage yourself and when you look back on it you can't exactly figure out why? That is because your emotions and actions took place subconsciously and you didn't even notice it happening until after it already happened).

Being attractive to women is about being confident. But what does that mean. It means being comfortable with the emotional tension that rises and falls when you meet a woman, when you discuss a risky/sexual topic, when you escalate physically with her, when you get sexual with her. These are very highly emotional situations and the guy that lives in his head thinking about each move he should make fails at doing these things. The guy that is able to sit in the tension, relax into his inner body, feel his being calm and quiet in his body as he enjoys the woman and his outer world, is the most attractive man in the room in pretty much all situations.

How do you practically do this?

Expand your awareness. Be more conscious of your body and your emotions on a daily basis as you walk around for starters. Meditation, yoga, sports, etc all help as well. None of these alone will do it for you though. You have to practice putting yourself in emotionally challenging situations and sitting in them and learning to become comfortable with being uncomfortable. You do this by going out and meeting lots of women, going on lots of dates, putting yourself in situations that cause an emotional reaction in your body and staying consciously aware of not only your emotional response but what is happening for the woman in that moment. The more you do this the better you get at it until it becomes second nature.

If you're deathly afraid at the moment to let a girl know you like her, to hold eye contact, to get physical/sexual with a girl then when these situations come up at the beginning you will be so focused on your inner experience and how uncomfortable it feels that you will feel immense amounts of fear, often retreat back to logic/thoughts(trying to figure out what to say as if there's ever some perfect line or thing to say bc there isn't), and generally just be more focused on yourself rather than her.

However as you have these situations happen more and more and you start to become comfortable with the rise and fall of emotions in your body, you will be able to relax into your body more, feel the emotions, and enjoy them. This is the ultimate place to be and where attraction is built. The difference between being attractive and being creepy is the guy that is attractive is comfortable and enjoying himself in his body as he's with the girl and the guy that's creepy is uncomfortable while trying to put on a front that he's confident as he retreats constantly from the present moment to his head to think of what to say. The girl immediately recognizes that the latter guy isn't comfortable in his own body and she doesn't trust a man that doesn't trust and isn't willing to feel his own emotions.

Think about what this signifies to the woman from an evolutionary standpoint. Hundreds or thousands of years ago, if the village was being attacked by another village trying to overtake it. The man who retreats from his emotions to his head is the same man that retreats from the village and leaves his wife and kids behind as he runs scared trying to save himself. The man that steps into the emotions, no matter how uncomfortable and says, **** it I gotta do this **** anyways, is the guy that joins the rest of the men and fights to protect the village. This is the fight or flight response that our body goes through. We live in a society now where we don't have to worry about things like that often if ever but it is still very applicable in terms of our fight or flight response when approaching, conversing, and escalating with women. When women realize you're confident in yourself and your ability to get **** done no matter what emotions rise up, not only that but you actually enjoy the emotions and use them as motivation to make **** happen, they realize you're a real man and they are instantly attracted.

The biggest actions that you will need to take in this area to get the results you want will be talking to lots of girls and pushing your comfort zone a little more each and every time. Anytime you get comfortable with something you need to push a little harder so you train you mind and body to be comfortable handling more and more emotional tension so you can remain calm and relaxed in the face of anything.

You can apply the same concepts to making money. You feel emotionally stressed everytime you think about starting a new business, take the first step and feel the emotions, rinse and repeat and keep pushing yourself a little more each day. Soon you will have built a business and you will look back on the whole thing and by the end it will feel easy and you'll wonder why you ever thought it was hard to being with.

Cliffs: So basically your saying: Dress well, Date more, learn to read girls better, become more relaxed and confident, Don't be afraid to make a move physically but do it nautrally, lose the shyness and fear and you will do better with girls.

Stopped reading after "being attractive to women has nothing to do with physical looks".

Women will overlook a lot ,but to dismiss looks completely....

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