Quote:
Originally Posted by Karak
If you go through life taking the approach that every unreasonable behavior or action must be met with retribution, especially when in a closed environment such as an office or home situation, you are not going to be a very happy or likable person.
This is pretty much a non-issue, because my home isn't full of unreasonable people. Of course, I don't have kids yet...
Quote:
Retribution serves nothing but to palate your own desire for vengeance. Revenge, from a logical standpoint, is costly and often will make your situation worse. It will rarely make anything better except inside your own mind. Once you can conquer these inherent desires for revenge, you will save a lot of time, effort and heartache while, at the same time, presenting yourself as a more mature and helpful functioning member of society.
Thanks, Chuang-Tzu.
I'm not saying the kid should slash the other guy's tires or something. I'm saying that disrespect of me -- to the point of saying "lol, why should I wash my dishes when I know you'll do them for me?" -- requires an answer.
Well, sir, you should do your dishes because if I have to do them, then in return, I won't do you the favor of keeping my stereo down at 6am when I get up to go to work. Or whatever.
Quote:
The obvious solution here is to make arrangements to move out or live with someone else or, if that is not possible, construct your living arrangement in a way where their behavior minimizes its impact on you.
Yes, obviously the right answer is "don't live with douchebags," but this guy said he's already contracted to live with them next year.
Quote:
If you do not clean up their things, the house will be a mess. Their behavior will unlikely change.
What is worth more to you? A clean house or not having to go through the extra effort of cleaning up to them? Once you decide, follow this course of behavior.
Instead, let's suppose that your roommate blacks out and pukes somewhere new in the apartment every night and never cleans it up. Where do you draw the line?
Quote:
By engaging in retribution it will either a) cause them to laugh at you and change nothing or b) cause them to increase the frequency of behavior in order to win the "dick waving" contest with your or c) cause them to engage in vengeful behavior all on their own, making your situation worse.
(a) that's not very good retribution
(b) have a bigger dick
(c) re-vengeance. Yes! An arms race. This always ends in detente, but we have to get there. Fights are the best friend-makers. Sometimes it takes people not liking each other for awhile, then everyone realizing how ridiculous the situation is and going "wait, let's stop this." Part of your disarmament can include them doing the dishes.
Quote:
If sitting down and talking to these guys did not solve the problem, do you really think going out of your way to antagonize them is going to make them say, "Oh! I guess he was right. We SHOULD help him out!"
Indirectly, sometimes.
Quote:
Doubtful. They have proven themselves to be unreasonable to this point, and if you expect them to reasonably and logically respond to your passive aggressive behavior to better their own situation (meaning they will think ok well if we do X he will stop doing Y), then you have failed to use history to make an effective decision.
They don't have to come to that conclusion themselves. You can help them by telling them "if you do X, I will stop doing Y. I don't like doing Y, but I don't understand why something as simple as X is such a big freakin' problem here. It takes less than 10 seconds to open the dishwasher, insert dish, close dishwasher."
Karak, I totally understand where you're coming from. But the kid getting pushed around on the playground has to fight back at some point, or he'll get pushed around forever.
Quote:
Originally Posted by yeotaJMU
We used to take a white board and use a tally system for various cleaning activities. That way when 2 or 3 people have a lot of tally's and 1 guy doesn't you can all get on his ass.
If that won't work have a sit down and ask why the **** they won't clean up and that is isn't unreasonable for you to ask that.
If THAT doesn't work I would have no problem with you dumping all their trash and dishes outside their bedroom (or in it if they leave it open).
I thought about this, but didn't know whose dishes they were. If they belong to the roommates, yes I'd do this. Alternately, skeet shooting the dishes could work. If they're yours, you should take them away and store them in your room. Use as needed.