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Old 10-30-2009, 05:53 AM   #31
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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Originally Posted by abcdefghijk View Post
"i know ur busy and all but i love you and want to spend time with you." good idea
+1

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Old 10-30-2009, 06:51 AM   #32
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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ive read a lot of threads here on student life and 2+2, and a common theme (as well as a common theme with me and my friends) is our insecurity when it comes to approaching a girl we have interest in.

in this thread, i propose we share stories (success and failures), tips, and propbets to help the community with girls.

i will start. there is a girl in my class (MWF) and we have "flirted" (i hate using that word, but i dont know what else to call it) for the last couple weeks. I am not sure if she has a bf, which always tilts me because i hate making things uncomfortable no matter where i am. if she has a bf, i have to be in class with her the rest of the semester. if she rejects me, the same awkwardness.

whats my move?
get out more maybe?
also craigslist is the best thing option imo.
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Old 10-30-2009, 10:17 AM   #33
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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are you ****ing serious? usually i just go with "do you have a boyfriend?" if i want to find out. but it doesn't matter if she is getting regularly plowed or not by some other guy as she could still have sex with you.
you suck
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Old 10-30-2009, 10:20 AM   #34
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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Ok so not a bad first attempt. I see where you made your errors though. It's not so much a big deal you didn't invite her to the party, its that you screwed up by not going the same way she needed to go. Her saying don't you have to go this way to get food was your chance to say oh yeah lol then you could have said are you sure you don't want to eat? my treat and then she prob would have been more inclined to say yes or atleast understand what you were trying to do. This also gives you another shot to say So about this party, would you like to go?

You made your big mistake by not going the way she was walking. Its ok though. There is next time. You can recover from this. You just need to focus and don't get down on yourself.
this is good advice
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Old 10-30-2009, 10:26 AM   #35
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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also, would you recommend that i tell her "i love you"?
Nooo- you need to wait AT LEAST 6 months before this. Try to be more casual and don't scare the **** out of her
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Old 10-30-2009, 11:30 AM   #36
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

ty for the advice, especially since i'm currently a dating noob and don't really understand the female psychology well yet


i'll try it out.


also, now that i've asked her out two weeks in a row and she's been busy two weeks in a row, should i ask her out again next week or should i stop asking her out temporarily to avoid seeming desperate?

finally, any advice on things to do with her without going out to dinner/movie cause she's clearly busy a lot on the weekends?
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Old 10-30-2009, 11:36 AM   #37
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

0 idea how it went from i just like flirting with her to contemplating the "i love you." You should probably never say that to someone unless you are 90% sure they have their feelings toward you are mutual.

I personally think that she is not interested in you as a bf, but more of a friend. A movie with the girls should not take up an entire night. Dinner at 5 should not impede on her girls night. I am just saying be cautious. This doesnt meant don't try at all, but i think a red flag should be up for you on her
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Old 10-30-2009, 01:02 PM   #38
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

my jaw just dropped.
abcetc, you have to be joking about this i love you thing.
for the record, how many texts have you sent her this past week?
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Old 10-30-2009, 01:05 PM   #39
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

a couple
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Old 10-30-2009, 01:07 PM   #40
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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a couple hundred
fyp?
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Old 10-30-2009, 03:20 PM   #41
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

has to be level....arggg it hurts just to picture such an awkward situation
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Old 10-30-2009, 05:01 PM   #42
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

How do you know when you are officially a couple? You start going on dates, hanging out, how do you make it official?
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Old 10-30-2009, 05:03 PM   #43
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

Another thought i had is why does it have to be dinner/movie- it's a touch 'official' for lack of a better word. Why don't you invite her to your next night out with your friends- if she is doing things with friends you can invite them along as well. This will show her your a laid back guy and know how to have a good time. Start building a friendship it should be pretty obvious if she likes you- you also have the added benefit for beer for confidence etc. Just don't drink 20 beers and this could work.
gogogo post results
end note- just tell me if this idea sucks
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Old 10-30-2009, 05:54 PM   #44
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

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How do you know when you are officially a couple? You start going on dates, hanging out, how do you make it official?
this is actually a pretty good question that a lot of people go about in the wrong fashion.

Usually when a guy/girl are dating each other one of them ends up asking the other one if they are official. Naturally they are gonna say yes. But what does that mean? A lot of people treat this as if an entirely new set of rules of engagment come into play and seemingly act differently since they are "official."

* acting differently is very vague for a set of conditions that each individual person puts on a relationship

In my honest opinion you should never have to ask the other one about becoming official. Its something that just kind of happens. Being a couple should basically mean you are exclusive with one another, rather facebook saying you are a couple, or you two saying you are a couple to your friends.

I guess what im trying to say in short is you don't want to feel like becoming a couple is some huge step that has to be taken...hopefully its something that is gradually worked into. For every "possible couple" this could be a short amount of time or a longer amount of time based on your chemistry with each other and other variables


hope that helps

cliffs: it should just happen, and when it does you should be able to recognize that its happened
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Old 10-30-2009, 06:32 PM   #45
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Re: SL "Ask Out A Girl" Thread

so i am in a kind of weird spot i don't know how to correctly deal with. recently i've started spending a lot more time with a girl i've known for about year, when i met her she had a boyfriend so i never really thought about it until now. we have had class together 5 days a week for last 2 semester. i feel like i'm getting fairly mixed messages from her, sometimes i feel like we are acting very couple-y and i'm guessing this is noticeable to our circle of friends.

on the other hand she seems to tend to invite other people along when we go and do things and we usually end up alone by virtue of walking hanging out right after class or other people not being able to come when she invites them. she also seems like the kind of girl who would be really bad at flirting so i wouldn't take it as a rejecting that she isn't making it obvious. i am considering just asking her flat out about it but don't want to then make it awkward when we see each other every day. not sure if i adequately conveyed the entire situation but any help appreciated
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