OK, here we go. Zeno, if bad furniture induces vomiting, turn back now.
What you're looking at:
A. The couch that's being replaced. I think my bro bought it for $100 or so from the Salvation Army for his dorm room. When I moved for grad school, he didn't want it anymore, and it was the only couch we had for me to take. The fabric is scratchy and worn, and a couple seams are busted, revealing the foam, although you can't see it from this angle. The foam inside has been irreparably packed down so that you feel the springs of the cushions poking into your butt when you sit on it. Heaven forbid you sit on one of the cracks between the three chunks: you'll be sitting on an unpadded pole.
B. A coffee table I bought cheap at a garage sale. The finish...would need redoing if this POS was actually worth the effort.
C. This used to be my dad's favorite chair, and my mom had always wanted to throw it out as long as I can remember. When I moved, she sent it with me to get it out of her life. The cushions you see are brand new. My mom bought them to replace the old worn original ones because she was so repulsed by seeing that chair again.
D. Another inherited chair. No one's favorite this time, just a chair to get rid of. We added the billowy cushion to make it actually comfortable enough to sit on.
E. A just lovely blue pile carpet that came with the apartment.
F. An ugly lamp that's at least as old as I am.
G. That lamp sits on an ugly table that's covered in an ugly table cloth. You can't see the pretty hideous trim around the table cloth. I should probably replace that, but it hasn't been a priority.
H. Probably the only nice thing in my apartment. It's a scroll my parents bought in China that's a press of some very old Chinese carvings that were in a cave. You can't see much of it. It extends all the way to the ceiling.
J. Busted old Venetian blinds that also came with the apartment.
K. My computer chair. My living room is also my office.
L. A cheap ugly desk that also came with the apartment. 100% particle board. The specks you see on the top of it are not dirt, but chips in the black finish. However, I didn't own a desk when I moved it, so it stayed.
M. The hardwood floor in this place needed refinishing (if not a complete overhaul) 10 years ago.
N. An ugly painting of owls. This was also inherited. My parents wouldn't hang it, but they gave it to me so I wouldn't have totally bare walls.