Before getting married, people should have a version of rumspringa.

Serial marrier, huh?

My secret to a long marriage:

Marry a divorce lawyer.

Thats why you need to think of all kinds of scenarios that could break you apart, including various versions of "worst case scenarios" imo. If you can't confidently say that you will be able to survive all the worst case scenarios then you shouldnt marry that person unless youre comfortable getting a (potentially messy) divorce in your future.

When I say this I mean literally all kinds of things: what if she cheats on me and gets pregnant (or vice versa), what if our careers diverge and one of us is forced to relocate to stick with a career they like, what if we both want to work and have a special needs kid who needs 24/7 attention, what if she develops chronic depression (or I do), what if our parenting techniques don't mesh, what if she owes a gambling debt and loses our car title (or I do), what if she feels more comfortable leaving me nothing and the kids everything in the will (or vice versa), what if I lose my job and we don't even have enough money to eat (or she does), etc. The list can go on forever. If the answer to any of these questions is anything short of "we will work through it together without placing blame, hurting each other's feelings long-term, or feeling vengeful or resentful" then I don't feel like you should be getting married.

Life is full of changes for better or worse and if you can't get through even the worst of times with your spouse then you have probably married the wrong person (or shouldn't have married at all). This is all just my opinion.

Secret to a cheap divorce:

Be related to a divorce attorney.

And after, hall passes.

No I definitely agree...and the ones that make it all the way adapt and change together effortlessly (or close to) however I think (and correct me if I'm wrong on this shot in the dark statistic) but I think the divorce ratio is higher for people 20-30 and I'd pit money on this being the reason why in nearly every case.

People change true enough... But most people aren't mature or emotionally stable enough to make a lifelong commitment before 30 IMO (I sure wasn't) and I think the majority of your basic adult personality is formed in these years... Sure it will always slightly change... But the biggest changes happen within people in these years.
Just my $0.02

Btw... Sup Katy?

Do most divorces involve lawyers? I always assumed the majority would be uncontested, filed by the couple. That's what I did.

Lol I thought the same thing until I got a notice in the mail from my ex's.

Yes I'm jaded.... but ive found that in most cases once it really hits home that it's over the gloves come off.

Agreed. Who people are and what they want changes, and even if both in the couple are Good, Giving, and Game, one person might not be able to fulfill what their partner later needs.

I feel divorces also come from folks not being honest before marriage, having unrealistic expectations about what their marriage will be, and failing to accept the price of admission that comes with a long term relationship with the specific person they've chosen as their spouse.

Pretty much this

After much thought, here is my suggested revision.

A person with a good partner is the luckiest person in the world. Until the partner grows bored or disenchanted. Then not so lucky.

Bottom line is you can't expect your partner to always be with you. We do expect that though. But in this life we are better off being independent and making a fullfilling life of our own. If we meet someone along the way who wants to tag along, then great. But making plans for the future...perilous. Be very careful.

katy, how are things with mr seagull?

I get what the OP is getting at... there is definitely something amazing about the excitement of a new relationship and initial attraction. It's like a drug. Getting married essentially means you are giving up that feeling forever, which is a lot to give up.

However you get a lot in return as well. I'm not sure I could explain it to someone who isn't married. It's more than a best friend. It's pretty awesome in it's own right.

I read somewhere that, when you're married, something hasn't really finished "happening to you" until you tell your wife about it. That rings very true to me.

Anyway my wife is awesome so YMMV. Also it's only been 10 years so come ask me again in another 30.