OK only read the first 50 replies.

It would be ridiculously awesome if the whole thing was to **** with you because he doesn't want you spying on him.

I am sorry but who really cares if he is gay? If hes bi or gay then you should just support him anyways. I know you said you would love him the same but for that to be really true then you should just talk to him and let him know you love him no matter what he thinks and feels. Be supportive as a parent. If he can declare on a internet forum that he is bi then he will most likely be honest with you if you ask him in private and explain to him that you feel like you 2 should be honest with each other and you just want to know the truth. Make him feel like he can tell you anything without consonances. I am not gay nor do I have kids but I can tell you that when I do, If the same thing happened to me this is how I would go about it. I would love my kids regardless of the sexual orientation. You should also make it a point to talk to your son about it before you talk to you wife so that he can understand that this "issue" can be personal between you two and you have trust in him as a person rather then just a child. Make it a point to tell him that whatever is discussed between you two can stay between you two. After you talk with your son ask him if it would be alright with him if you discussed it in private with your wife.

Just my 2 cents on the topic, take it or leave it.

yeah kind of grunching too....

In this day and age this isnt an issue....at all. Gay or straight it really doesnt matter.
...and imo the "concerned parent" bit about it being hard for him growing up gay/bi sounds like rationalized homophobia fwiw. Support him....you dont want your opinions or beliefs effecting his opinion on this. Its a very trying time in a boys life and parental and environmental factors will make a huge impact on how he handles these feelings. Encourage him to express and understand these feelings. You dont want him to just hermit up because he's embarrassed. Just tell him that you're there if he wants to talk and that you support any safe decision that he makes and be done with it. If he wants to talk about it he will...if not then its no different than a straight kid not wanting to tell dad everything about his girlfriends.


i assume without looking this was the general opinion of the lounge anyways.

I don't agree with this statement at all. Gay people have more difficult lives in our society, and much higher rates of suicide (this is one of the reasons people arguing that it is a choice are wrong: most rational people would not "choose" to be gay in current American society.) People still get beaten up/discriminated against/harassed for being gay/bisexual. Bisexual men may have even MORE difficult lives because often they are rejected by both heterosexuals and homosexuals.

Worrying that your child's life will be more difficult if he is gay is facing reality, not being homophobic. It can be used to justify homophobia, yes, but worrying is also what parents do. A parent that is perfectly okay with her child's sexuality, whatever it may be, may still worry the way she might worry that her child's life will be more difficult because he is dyslexic. In both cases, the answer is to love your child and support him and do your very best to give them coping tools.

Just make sure you make yourself as accesible as possible in terms of speaking to one another. For example ( if religious ) Dont make statements like "Gays will go to Hell". This way he will not be put off talking to you should he want to.

I agree with everything you say and don't think homosexuality is a choice, but smoking is 'irrational' as well and plenty of people choose to do that. Goth and emos don't get the smoothest run either, but no one thinks that's genetic.

Just saying.

Ok. This is coming straight from a bisexual 14 year old male. Many people do not understand bisexuality. Many people, such as you said, view it as there are gay and straight people. If someone likes both genders, they must be confused. Wrong! I can have one day in which I am VERY attracted to a cute boy. Then the next, I want to **** a hot cheerleader. If this isn't bisexual, I don't know what is! Anyways, the BEST advice I can give to someone who is dealing with a bisexual boy who probably isn't fully accepting of it yet.

1. When he comes out to you, be completely accepting of it.
2. Once he does come out to you, joke about it to him, it will make him feel more comfortable.
3. This is if he never comes out: just act like he is your son. That's all he wants. He just wants to feel accepted, and feels he needs a title to accept himself.

I hope you at least read this. Enjoy.