2 Unstoppable forces are pitted against each other by the bad guys. Somehow they don't kill each other and become best buddies and kill everyone

I love heist movies but they really need to come up with another plot impetus beyond "one last score."

Spaeking of chase scenes. The car drivers are always talented enough to do u-turns through Manhattan traffic, but somehow manage to crash head-on into a telephone pole in the middle of no-where to finish the chase.

No-one ever gets shot in the head when they're wearing a bullet-proof vest.

On IRC we discuss these quite frequently. (#sstakes on Efnet, if you are interested.)

--"Ironic" jump cuts. Best example off the top of my head is in Jurassic Park where Ellie is like "unless they figured out how to open doors..." and it cuts to a velociraptor opening a door.

--BS arguments over jurisdiction between FBI, local cops, NSA, CIA, you name it. Like in Die Hard when Paul Gleason and Reginald VelJohnson are battling with the FBI over who has control.

--A Rubik's cube is the gold standard for displaying intelligence. If there is a character and the filmmaker wants to make him seem like a genius, he will solve a Rubik's cube in 8 seconds.

--Rookie cop and veteran cop are chasing a bad guy. Rookie cop takes the straightforward route of following him, while the veteran cop who "knows the terrain" takes the shortcut and cuts the bad guy off, surprising him and becoming the hero of the scene. I believe this happens in A Devil's Own, to name one of a gazillion instances.

--Guy driving, girl in the passenger seat. Guy is all casual, looking away from the road, looking at her. All of a sudden--surprise!--she looks forward. "LOOK OUT!!" And then they get flattened.

--Chick washing her face in front of the bathroom mirror. She looks at herself, smiles, dips down to rinse, stands up, and omfgwtfbbq there's someone behind her and she screams. And of course, 98% of the time, it's her dad.

--(Shout-out to miajag for this one)... Courtroom scene. Defense lawyer does something completely bull****, prosecutor objects. Judge lays down the law with "THIS IS HIGHLY UNORTHODOX... but I'll allow it!"

And no one ever gets caught/scammed/double crossed on their 2nd to last score

For that matter, thief decides to go straight/retire, but gets blackmailed or otherwise coerced into doing another job. I always wondered why they didn't just cap the guy blackmailing them.

Cheritto in "Heat" was shot right between the eyes.

Yes. I'd like to see at least one of these movies that has the crew members going over retirement options with their financial planner who explains that their retirement goals cannot be met by just "one more score."

"You're a loose cannon! You're costing the city too much money! I'd fire ya, but dammit, you're a good cop. I'm sending you to the worst precinct in the city."

For me this is the winner.

Incredibly lazy device to show how the guy is a bad father or whatever, often the impetus for some kind of breakup/divorce or shattering of the relationship with the kid or whatever. Can they not write something better than this?

I don't know about anyone else, but when I was a kid playing sports, I couldn't have cared less if my parents were there or not, I was playing because IT WAS FUN. Maybe there are people out there who were only performing for their parents' approval or something, but I just can't relate.

"Do you know how to use one of these?" *hero hands gun to some random dorky looking dude and we get a response along the lines of: "I just point at the bad guy and shoot right?" or we get "I WAS the Marksmen State Champion back in 89."

"The safety's on." good guy/bad guy looks down then WAM guy gets punched in the face and gun is taken away.

Haven't watched a romantic comedy in years, not sure if they still do this. Guy or girl tells guy/girl a lie..they date they get along, they're in love they're talking about having babies...then so and so finds out about the lie, they leave them, 10 minutes later they're back together and in love THE END AWWWW

Night of the Comet does it like 3 times in 5 minutes.... Greatest movie ever IMO

fast zombies r scary

In car chase scenes, there's always enough space in oncoming traffic for getaway cars and unmarked chase cars to fit through, but not for generic cop cars.

Cop/Detective gets reinstated for some reason and captain ALWAYS tosses badge back.

Chick hero subdues bad guy, often with a shovel or other blunt instrument, occasionally a gun, dissolves into a puddle of emotion before leaving the scene.
Bad guy recovers enough to reprise threat.

Jamie Lee Curtis leads the league in this category.

All the while hyde is yelling " KEEP HITTING HIM".

they should make a movie like that, where they build up to the big heist, and then suddenly very unexpected the bad guy gets capped within the first 10 minutes or so, and then it turns into a horror movie, where suddenly zombies run over the city. And then in the end after a really tough fight and a bunch of chases hero is left alone in a room, and he gets eaten by the zombies after he caps a whole bunch, the end.

I WOULD DEF WATCH THAT

would also be cool if they show a trailer with only the heist stuff in the beginning, preferably with some made up material thats not in the movie. Then you hype it up big time (like make some famous movie star like daniel day lewis be the bad guy, and a bunch of other famous be the good guy). Everyone goes see it in theaters will be like wtf this movie is weird. Then everyone else wont believe them and goes to see it too, resulting in an overflow of people going to movie theaters. Resulting in making you a ton of money.

In the end we can learn something from it, dont kill cliches, it will result in hordes of zombies.

I was traveling with a group of friends once. The group was too big for one cab, so some of us went into the first cab. I went into the second cab with 3 other people. One of us said, "Follow that cab!" The driver just did as he was asked and made no other comment.

The hero gets laid in the first ten minutes of the movie, to remain selabate throughout the rest.

thus the only redeeming feature of that 'intelligent sharks' movie with samuel jackson in it, was when the hot white girl gets eaten right at the end, leaving the black dude as the survivor.


also: man rushes to airport in order to stop his loved one from leaving. Arrives in time to see plane leaving. Oh No! But she got off the plane and is standing behind him. It's all ok.

Play "guess who the villain/heavy is" in this scene. Hint: he's probably wearing black leather, has facial hair, and his hair is either jet black or platinum blonde.

A car smashes into another car and flips over it instead of just stopping dead.

Southern cops are always fat, dim-witted, and vaguely racist.

I take it you never been to the south.

I knew I was slow-pitching that one over home plate, but I couldn't resist.

Here's another: in just about any movie that features the President, he will eventually say "I am the President of the United States!"

The first car to run the redlight just barely misses getting hit, while the second car gets wiped out.

Are you a fat black lady?

I've seen this one a hundred times. Crusty old judge captures big city bankers and lawyers, offers them dinner with condiments presented via a pickle-shooting train, judge takes bite into Dutch prize-winner, and BAM, his nose is the tip of a penis.