Married With Children - Episode by Episode Guide and Discussion
05-25-2010
, 02:09 AM
06-06-2010
, 07:40 AM
Season 5, episode 2: Al... with Kelly
Synopsis: Kelly and Al feign sickness so that they can avoid going to Peg's mother's place. Kelly ends up really getting sick, and Al has to take care of her.
6.5/10: Yeah, some nice lines, but this episode is notable for a few firsts and other things. Pamela Anderson is in it as one of Al's dream girls ('Yvette'), but the true firsts are: Al mentions he scored 4 touchdowns in 1 game in highschool football; we see Al watch Psycho Dad for the first time. I love that theme song - I'm gonna get it for my phone. Plus awesome catfighting between two blondes on a bed, who then ask Al to join in:
Dialogue:
------------------
Al: God, what a day in the shoe store. We had a clearance sale. We had to get rid of all our size 13DDDD. The store was packed with women. Well, there were actually only two in the store but it was wall to wall.
------------------
Peg: So, are you really sick? You're not trying to get out of going to see my mother.
Al: Now, Peg. That hurts. You know how much I love that huge fat woman.
------------------
Al (in a quandry): What would Psycho Dad do?
------------------
Who's that riding into the sun.
Who's the man with the itchy gun.
Who's the man who kills for fun!
Psycho Dad. Psycho Dad. Psycho Dad!
He sleeps with a gun, but he loves his son.
Killed his wife 'cause she weighed a ton... Psycho Dad!
Synopsis: Kelly and Al feign sickness so that they can avoid going to Peg's mother's place. Kelly ends up really getting sick, and Al has to take care of her.
6.5/10: Yeah, some nice lines, but this episode is notable for a few firsts and other things. Pamela Anderson is in it as one of Al's dream girls ('Yvette'), but the true firsts are: Al mentions he scored 4 touchdowns in 1 game in highschool football; we see Al watch Psycho Dad for the first time. I love that theme song - I'm gonna get it for my phone. Plus awesome catfighting between two blondes on a bed, who then ask Al to join in:
Dialogue:
------------------
Al: God, what a day in the shoe store. We had a clearance sale. We had to get rid of all our size 13DDDD. The store was packed with women. Well, there were actually only two in the store but it was wall to wall.
------------------
Peg: So, are you really sick? You're not trying to get out of going to see my mother.
Al: Now, Peg. That hurts. You know how much I love that huge fat woman.
------------------
Al (in a quandry): What would Psycho Dad do?
------------------
Who's that riding into the sun.
Who's the man with the itchy gun.
Who's the man who kills for fun!
Psycho Dad. Psycho Dad. Psycho Dad!
He sleeps with a gun, but he loves his son.
Killed his wife 'cause she weighed a ton... Psycho Dad!
06-28-2010
, 10:56 AM
Season 5, episode 3: Sue Casa, His Casa
Synopsis: Al goes to court when a Mercedes hits the Bundy Dodge - according to Bud, who just got his licence. Everything falls apart of course, and Al gets the worst of it.
5.0/10: Eh not bad, not that memorable, but okay to fill for a week. Seeing Kelly act like Stevie Wonder whilst pretending to be blind was a highlight.
Dialogue:
------------------
Al: Son, let this be a lesson to you: never do tequila shooters within a country mile of a marriage chapel.
------------------
Peg: [after Al puts on the "Bon Jovi hair"] Gee, Al. You look like Tarzan. He was old and gay.
Al: Well, Peg, if you were Jane, believe me, he would be.
------------------
(After Kelly says something particularly dumb)
Al (to Peg): Still think it was a good idea to only put on 5 pounds when you were pregnant with her?
Synopsis: Al goes to court when a Mercedes hits the Bundy Dodge - according to Bud, who just got his licence. Everything falls apart of course, and Al gets the worst of it.
5.0/10: Eh not bad, not that memorable, but okay to fill for a week. Seeing Kelly act like Stevie Wonder whilst pretending to be blind was a highlight.
Dialogue:
------------------
Al: Son, let this be a lesson to you: never do tequila shooters within a country mile of a marriage chapel.
------------------
Peg: [after Al puts on the "Bon Jovi hair"] Gee, Al. You look like Tarzan. He was old and gay.
Al: Well, Peg, if you were Jane, believe me, he would be.
------------------
(After Kelly says something particularly dumb)
Al (to Peg): Still think it was a good idea to only put on 5 pounds when you were pregnant with her?
06-28-2010
, 04:31 PM
Katy, I've been meaning to ask about where your undertitle came from....
07-01-2010
, 08:31 AM
Season 5, Episode 4: The Unnatural
synposis: Al puts in a poor performance during a softball game, and his team want him out, but Kelly, Bud and Peg hold 3 required votes. Of course, he gets voted off, and his team get to the end, and need one man to bat, and only Al is left...
7.5/10: Reasonably funny and watchable, but not among the most funny, but still, one of my favourites for what Al endures. They treat him like a dog, despise him, and kick him out. His 'Dad' nature comes through - he believes in himself and 'dad-ness' more than his kids do, and in the end, he wins out. While everyone lets him down and thinks him useless, does he turn his back when they need him to deliver? DOES HE, HELL.
It's good to see Al come out on top, just once, and to see him - and his holding onto an ideal - win out.
And there's a final, filmed scene which is very sweet.
I'm not even going to do any dialogue, because I think every line in this one is really best seen in context.
Good old Al.
synposis: Al puts in a poor performance during a softball game, and his team want him out, but Kelly, Bud and Peg hold 3 required votes. Of course, he gets voted off, and his team get to the end, and need one man to bat, and only Al is left...
7.5/10: Reasonably funny and watchable, but not among the most funny, but still, one of my favourites for what Al endures. They treat him like a dog, despise him, and kick him out. His 'Dad' nature comes through - he believes in himself and 'dad-ness' more than his kids do, and in the end, he wins out. While everyone lets him down and thinks him useless, does he turn his back when they need him to deliver? DOES HE, HELL.
It's good to see Al come out on top, just once, and to see him - and his holding onto an ideal - win out.
And there's a final, filmed scene which is very sweet.
I'm not even going to do any dialogue, because I think every line in this one is really best seen in context.
Good old Al.
Last edited by diebitter; 07-02-2010 at 12:33 PM.
07-02-2010
, 10:03 AM
Season 5, Episode 5: Dance Show
Synopsis: Al doesn't mind when Peg starts going to Marcy's dance hall and trips the light fantastic with a handsome man, until another man tells Al that Peg is stealing his husband. Yes, you read that right.
7/10: A good one, it's fun to see Al so obsessed with food, and so unobsessed with Peggy going out every night dancing. Also fun to see Dan Castellaneta (the voice of Homer Simpson) as the neglected 'wife' of the guy Peg is dancing with, who Al falls in love with (hey, he works, he cooks up a storm, he likes sports, what's not to love?). Also, it's the one where Kelly is fantasizing about being president.
Dialogue:
----------------------
Al (after getting home from work and being rolled by the kids): I'll get my woman to get me some food. I wonder where the monster is. (we hear Peg yawning). There's the coffin opening now.
----------------------
Al (opening the door and expecting pizza, but finds Marcy): Well it's flat and cheesy, but it's no pizza.
----------------------
Al (to Pete): Wait a second. You work, you cook, and you like sports?
Pete: Yeah. Except for soccer, that's not really a man's game.
Al: I love you.
----------------------
Pete: You gotta help me. I want my husband back. Isn't there any way you can talk to them?
Al: I don't know, Pete. What about us? Won't that interfere with our quality time?
Pete: No, I'll make time, I'll make time for you. We'll go to a ball-game, I'll make us a picnic basket, with crispy fried chicken...
(All giggles like a schoolgirl)
Synopsis: Al doesn't mind when Peg starts going to Marcy's dance hall and trips the light fantastic with a handsome man, until another man tells Al that Peg is stealing his husband. Yes, you read that right.
7/10: A good one, it's fun to see Al so obsessed with food, and so unobsessed with Peggy going out every night dancing. Also fun to see Dan Castellaneta (the voice of Homer Simpson) as the neglected 'wife' of the guy Peg is dancing with, who Al falls in love with (hey, he works, he cooks up a storm, he likes sports, what's not to love?). Also, it's the one where Kelly is fantasizing about being president.
Dialogue:
----------------------
Al (after getting home from work and being rolled by the kids): I'll get my woman to get me some food. I wonder where the monster is. (we hear Peg yawning). There's the coffin opening now.
----------------------
Al (opening the door and expecting pizza, but finds Marcy): Well it's flat and cheesy, but it's no pizza.
----------------------
Al (to Pete): Wait a second. You work, you cook, and you like sports?
Pete: Yeah. Except for soccer, that's not really a man's game.
Al: I love you.
----------------------
Pete: You gotta help me. I want my husband back. Isn't there any way you can talk to them?
Al: I don't know, Pete. What about us? Won't that interfere with our quality time?
Pete: No, I'll make time, I'll make time for you. We'll go to a ball-game, I'll make us a picnic basket, with crispy fried chicken...
(All giggles like a schoolgirl)
Last edited by diebitter; 07-02-2010 at 12:33 PM.
Reason: altered the score - was too harsh
07-04-2010
, 08:32 AM
Season 5, Episode 6: Kelly Bounces Back
synposis: Kelly takes up modelling, and invents the 'Bundy Bounce' to apply for a modelling job - but it gets stolen - how could it, when only her and Bud know about it? Also, Peg goes on strike, and Al enjoys the peace.
4/10: Probably the weakest episode I've seen so far, but still kind of fun. The Bundy Bounce is worth seeing at least, as is Al relishing the peace he's getting whilst Peg's on strike. But boy does he pay when she comes off strike.
synposis: Kelly takes up modelling, and invents the 'Bundy Bounce' to apply for a modelling job - but it gets stolen - how could it, when only her and Bud know about it? Also, Peg goes on strike, and Al enjoys the peace.
4/10: Probably the weakest episode I've seen so far, but still kind of fun. The Bundy Bounce is worth seeing at least, as is Al relishing the peace he's getting whilst Peg's on strike. But boy does he pay when she comes off strike.
07-04-2010
, 07:14 PM
Quote:
Season 5, Episode 1: We'll Follow the Sun
Synopsis: It's Labor Day. Al decides to take the family on a vacation, and see America by car, but instead they end up spending the entire time caught in a
traffic jam on the freeway.
7.5/10: A corker to open this season. This one is excellent, some good cracks at Marcy, Peg and Al going off at each other, and the entire family beat the crap out of another family that gives them lip in the car next door for singing 'The Cow Kicked Nelly'. Topped off by one of Al's everyman speeches, that first get the mob on his side, but eventually lead to them attacking him....
Dialogue:
-------------------
Peg: Did you miss me?
Al: With every bullet so far.
Peg: Well, maybe you need a bigger gun, sweetheart. Not that I don't love your itty-bitty one.
-------------------
Al: Everybody, I have an announcement. Your happiness... sickens me. Everybody but me is looking at good times. But for me it's been one long continuous year since I got married. Actually, one long month. Helluary.
-------------------
Peg: Al, we have not moved an inch in two hours.
Al: Peg, I can hear that in our bedroom. Now just shut up and let me enjoy myself.
Peg: I could hear that in our bedroom too, honey.
-------------------
(Peg stops by a car that's rocking side to side and peers inside.)
Peg: Boy, that takes me back.
Synopsis: It's Labor Day. Al decides to take the family on a vacation, and see America by car, but instead they end up spending the entire time caught in a
traffic jam on the freeway.
7.5/10: A corker to open this season. This one is excellent, some good cracks at Marcy, Peg and Al going off at each other, and the entire family beat the crap out of another family that gives them lip in the car next door for singing 'The Cow Kicked Nelly'. Topped off by one of Al's everyman speeches, that first get the mob on his side, but eventually lead to them attacking him....
Dialogue:
-------------------
Peg: Did you miss me?
Al: With every bullet so far.
Peg: Well, maybe you need a bigger gun, sweetheart. Not that I don't love your itty-bitty one.
-------------------
Al: Everybody, I have an announcement. Your happiness... sickens me. Everybody but me is looking at good times. But for me it's been one long continuous year since I got married. Actually, one long month. Helluary.
-------------------
Peg: Al, we have not moved an inch in two hours.
Al: Peg, I can hear that in our bedroom. Now just shut up and let me enjoy myself.
Peg: I could hear that in our bedroom too, honey.
-------------------
(Peg stops by a car that's rocking side to side and peers inside.)
Peg: Boy, that takes me back.
07-06-2010
, 04:10 PM
Quote:
Season 5, Episode 4: The Unnatural
synposis: Al puts in a poor performance during a softball game, and his team want him out, but Kelly, Bud and Peg hold 3 required votes. Of course, he gets voted off, and his team get to the end, and need one man to bat, and only Al is left...
7.5/10: Reasonably funny and watchable, but not among the most funny, but still, one of my favourites for what Al endures. They treat him like a dog, despise him, and kick him out. His 'Dad' nature comes through - he believes in himself and 'dad-ness' more than his kids do, and in the end, he wins out. While everyone lets him down and thinks him useless, does he turn his back when they need him to deliver? DOES HE, HELL.
It's good to see Al come out on top, just once, and to see him - and his holding onto an ideal - win out.
And there's a final, filmed scene which is very sweet.
I'm not even going to do any dialogue, because I think every line in this one is really best seen in context.
Good old Al.
synposis: Al puts in a poor performance during a softball game, and his team want him out, but Kelly, Bud and Peg hold 3 required votes. Of course, he gets voted off, and his team get to the end, and need one man to bat, and only Al is left...
7.5/10: Reasonably funny and watchable, but not among the most funny, but still, one of my favourites for what Al endures. They treat him like a dog, despise him, and kick him out. His 'Dad' nature comes through - he believes in himself and 'dad-ness' more than his kids do, and in the end, he wins out. While everyone lets him down and thinks him useless, does he turn his back when they need him to deliver? DOES HE, HELL.
It's good to see Al come out on top, just once, and to see him - and his holding onto an ideal - win out.
And there's a final, filmed scene which is very sweet.
I'm not even going to do any dialogue, because I think every line in this one is really best seen in context.
Good old Al.
07-14-2010
, 02:13 AM
Season 5, Episode 7: Married with Aliens
Synopsis: Little Green Alients are stealing Al's socks, and no one will believe him.
6.5/10: Well, the synopsis says it all, and probably the first episode to be based on the completely fantastic, but it was a fun premise and they really ran with it. The aliens are obsessed with Al's used socks, and they're friendly little fellows, posing for his camera.
Dialogue:
--------------------
Peggy: Hi, honey. We were just deciding who was going to pick you up.
Al: Why don't you use the method you used on our wedding day? You know, have a couple of uncles baseball bat my knees, throw me in the trunk of the car. Or were they stuck in Wanker County, where as Einstein would put it, everyone's relative.
--------------------
Peggy: Listen, Al. You suffered a head injury today. You're probably seriously hurt, and require immediate medical attention. Now go to sleep.
--------------------
Al: Peg! Three little green aliens came in here and stole my socks!
Peggy: Where they green before or after they touched your socks?
--------------------
Al: Anybody call?
Kelly: Yeah! The Loch Ness Monster and Big Foot wanted to know if you're still on for poker tomorrow night over at Darth Vader's house? The uh, the Klingons are bringing the chips.
--------------------
End message:
"Long ago, in the Galaxy Euryops, a great, menacing comet was born. Colossal in size, deadly in trajectory, it hurtled unstoppable through the universe, on a collision course with many inhabited planets. Among the doomed was a small green world called Earth. But on planet Philydion they still sing songs of the man who made it possible for the comet to be destroyed. The man who saved Earth and a hundred worlds, by providing fuel for the ships which diverted the comet. And that man is.... AL BUNDY."
Synopsis: Little Green Alients are stealing Al's socks, and no one will believe him.
6.5/10: Well, the synopsis says it all, and probably the first episode to be based on the completely fantastic, but it was a fun premise and they really ran with it. The aliens are obsessed with Al's used socks, and they're friendly little fellows, posing for his camera.
Dialogue:
--------------------
Peggy: Hi, honey. We were just deciding who was going to pick you up.
Al: Why don't you use the method you used on our wedding day? You know, have a couple of uncles baseball bat my knees, throw me in the trunk of the car. Or were they stuck in Wanker County, where as Einstein would put it, everyone's relative.
--------------------
Peggy: Listen, Al. You suffered a head injury today. You're probably seriously hurt, and require immediate medical attention. Now go to sleep.
--------------------
Al: Peg! Three little green aliens came in here and stole my socks!
Peggy: Where they green before or after they touched your socks?
--------------------
Al: Anybody call?
Kelly: Yeah! The Loch Ness Monster and Big Foot wanted to know if you're still on for poker tomorrow night over at Darth Vader's house? The uh, the Klingons are bringing the chips.
--------------------
End message:
"Long ago, in the Galaxy Euryops, a great, menacing comet was born. Colossal in size, deadly in trajectory, it hurtled unstoppable through the universe, on a collision course with many inhabited planets. Among the doomed was a small green world called Earth. But on planet Philydion they still sing songs of the man who made it possible for the comet to be destroyed. The man who saved Earth and a hundred worlds, by providing fuel for the ships which diverted the comet. And that man is.... AL BUNDY."
07-14-2010
, 02:23 AM
08-09-2010
, 06:17 PM
Season 5, Episode 8: Wabbit Season
Synopsis: Al is under pressure, and the doctor orders him to relax. To combat stress, he starts a vegetable garden, but the combat turns physical when a rabbit swipes his carrots. This becomes a war of wills: Bundy against Bunny.
6/10: Not a great one, in fact we've already had him doing much the same with a mouse in an earlier season (and it was better there, as Steve joined in the idiocy), but watchable.
Dialogue:
-------------------------------------
Al Bundy: Oh, Peg, it was horrible. 16 straight hours of shoe-selling mayhem. The last thing I remember that that I was down on one knee, waiting on an overflowing glacier of a woman. The first thing they teach you when you're a rookie shoe salesman is when you've got a fat one in the chair, never look up. I looked up, Peg. I saw underwear. It said "Saturday."
Peggy Bundy: So what?
Al Bundy: Today's Wednesday!
-------------------------------------
Al: Ol' McBundy had a farm, B-U-N-D-Y.
And on this farm there was no wife, B-U-N-D-Y.
With a no wife here, and no kids there,
And a hooker coming over on Friday night,
Big hooters with a pizza and a beer there,
Old McBundy had a farm, B-U-N-D-Y!
-------------------------------------
Al Bundy: [in Elmer Fudd voice] Be vewy vewy quiet. I'm hunting wabbits.
Bud: oh, boy.
Synopsis: Al is under pressure, and the doctor orders him to relax. To combat stress, he starts a vegetable garden, but the combat turns physical when a rabbit swipes his carrots. This becomes a war of wills: Bundy against Bunny.
6/10: Not a great one, in fact we've already had him doing much the same with a mouse in an earlier season (and it was better there, as Steve joined in the idiocy), but watchable.
Dialogue:
-------------------------------------
Al Bundy: Oh, Peg, it was horrible. 16 straight hours of shoe-selling mayhem. The last thing I remember that that I was down on one knee, waiting on an overflowing glacier of a woman. The first thing they teach you when you're a rookie shoe salesman is when you've got a fat one in the chair, never look up. I looked up, Peg. I saw underwear. It said "Saturday."
Peggy Bundy: So what?
Al Bundy: Today's Wednesday!
-------------------------------------
Al: Ol' McBundy had a farm, B-U-N-D-Y.
And on this farm there was no wife, B-U-N-D-Y.
With a no wife here, and no kids there,
And a hooker coming over on Friday night,
Big hooters with a pizza and a beer there,
Old McBundy had a farm, B-U-N-D-Y!
-------------------------------------
Al Bundy: [in Elmer Fudd voice] Be vewy vewy quiet. I'm hunting wabbits.
Bud: oh, boy.
08-17-2010
, 05:20 PM
Season 5, Episode 9: Do ya think I'm Sexy?
Synopsis: For some strange reason, the neighbourhood women start seeing Al as a hunk, and then the women at the mall. Peg gets peeved, but Al's loving being treated as a sex object.
9/10: OH, I LOVED THIS ONE. I had seen it, but forgotten how damn funny it is. Some great lines, and excellent performances from Al and Peg. Even Marcy gets hot for Al. But poor Al, given a chance to get away from everything, has to do what a man must do. Turn it down, because he's married...with children... Just hilarious.
Dialogue
-------------------
Brenda: Hi, I'm Brenda Kostrowski. Peggy, do you mind if I borrow this big, strong guy?
(Al turns to Peggy, smiling like a child.)
Peg: Yeah, okay, uh, just have him back by tomorrow. He has to perform brain surgery in the morning and he has a loafer sale in the afternoon.
Al: Ah, my mother worries so.
-------------------
Al: After I moved Brenda's couch, she said I was cute. Oh, Peg, I think she likes me!
Peg: Aww, honey, how could she? Oh, believe me, Al, and I'm telling you this as your wife and as your friend. No one likes you.
-------------------
Al: Oh-ho-ho, those poor Al-starved neighborhood women. Hey, if loving me is wrong, they don't wanna be right. [laughs] Pumpkin, can I ask you something? When two people are as beautiful as we are, is it terrible to flaunt what we have?
Kelly: Terrible?? It's an obligation. A duty. I mean, it's like belonging to whoever wins you in a knife fight.
-------------------
Peg: I don't know what to do. He's happy, he smells good. He's even making more money at the shoe store. And last night, while I was rifling through his pants to get some of it, I found these: [holds out some tic tacs to show Marcy] Tic Tacs!
(Peggy breaks down. Marcy comforts her.)
Marcy: Well, according to the book I've just read: "Keep Him Down, Keep Him Down, Keep Him Down: A Woman's Guide To Happiness", you don't really have to worry until a man stops buying white underwear. The time to sweat is when men buy underwear in a tube. You know, the bright colored ones that European men use as bathing suits?
-------------------
Al: Lovely ladies.
(Marcy giggles girlishly.)
Marcy: [shyly] Hi, Al.
Peg: Shut up! [to Al] What are you doing home in the middle of the day?
Al: Well, I thought I'd freshen up a bit with a shower then go back to work. Oh by the way, [holds up the tube] have you seen my new underwear? Zebra striped!
(He goes upstairs. Marcy watches him.)
Marcy: Uh-huh. He looks just as good going as he does coming.
Peg: Marcy!
Marcy: I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me.
Al [from upstairs]: Peg, you gotta come up and check me out in my new underwear. Oh, you can bring Marcy too.
Marcy: Can we, Peggy, can we???
------------------
Al: I realized that everything I've been doing up until now, the bathing, the brushing, the changing of the socks, being nice to people, trying to succeed... all for nothing. All those things are designed to attract. Why should I be attractive? I'm married with children.
Synopsis: For some strange reason, the neighbourhood women start seeing Al as a hunk, and then the women at the mall. Peg gets peeved, but Al's loving being treated as a sex object.
9/10: OH, I LOVED THIS ONE. I had seen it, but forgotten how damn funny it is. Some great lines, and excellent performances from Al and Peg. Even Marcy gets hot for Al. But poor Al, given a chance to get away from everything, has to do what a man must do. Turn it down, because he's married...with children... Just hilarious.
Dialogue
-------------------
Brenda: Hi, I'm Brenda Kostrowski. Peggy, do you mind if I borrow this big, strong guy?
(Al turns to Peggy, smiling like a child.)
Peg: Yeah, okay, uh, just have him back by tomorrow. He has to perform brain surgery in the morning and he has a loafer sale in the afternoon.
Al: Ah, my mother worries so.
-------------------
Al: After I moved Brenda's couch, she said I was cute. Oh, Peg, I think she likes me!
Peg: Aww, honey, how could she? Oh, believe me, Al, and I'm telling you this as your wife and as your friend. No one likes you.
-------------------
Al: Oh-ho-ho, those poor Al-starved neighborhood women. Hey, if loving me is wrong, they don't wanna be right. [laughs] Pumpkin, can I ask you something? When two people are as beautiful as we are, is it terrible to flaunt what we have?
Kelly: Terrible?? It's an obligation. A duty. I mean, it's like belonging to whoever wins you in a knife fight.
-------------------
Peg: I don't know what to do. He's happy, he smells good. He's even making more money at the shoe store. And last night, while I was rifling through his pants to get some of it, I found these: [holds out some tic tacs to show Marcy] Tic Tacs!
(Peggy breaks down. Marcy comforts her.)
Marcy: Well, according to the book I've just read: "Keep Him Down, Keep Him Down, Keep Him Down: A Woman's Guide To Happiness", you don't really have to worry until a man stops buying white underwear. The time to sweat is when men buy underwear in a tube. You know, the bright colored ones that European men use as bathing suits?
-------------------
Al: Lovely ladies.
(Marcy giggles girlishly.)
Marcy: [shyly] Hi, Al.
Peg: Shut up! [to Al] What are you doing home in the middle of the day?
Al: Well, I thought I'd freshen up a bit with a shower then go back to work. Oh by the way, [holds up the tube] have you seen my new underwear? Zebra striped!
(He goes upstairs. Marcy watches him.)
Marcy: Uh-huh. He looks just as good going as he does coming.
Peg: Marcy!
Marcy: I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me.
Al [from upstairs]: Peg, you gotta come up and check me out in my new underwear. Oh, you can bring Marcy too.
Marcy: Can we, Peggy, can we???
------------------
Al: I realized that everything I've been doing up until now, the bathing, the brushing, the changing of the socks, being nice to people, trying to succeed... all for nothing. All those things are designed to attract. Why should I be attractive? I'm married with children.
08-29-2010
, 03:51 AM
Season 5, Episode 10: One Down, Two To Go
Synopsis: Kelly is tired of Al beating up and throwing out her boyfriends now she's 18, and move out. Peg goes nuts and starts mothering Bud like there's no tomorrow.
6/10: Some good laughs, especially concerning Peg traumatizing Bud with her way-too-late mothering effort, and it's always fun to see Al beating up Kelly's boyfriends.
Synopsis: Kelly is tired of Al beating up and throwing out her boyfriends now she's 18, and move out. Peg goes nuts and starts mothering Bud like there's no tomorrow.
6/10: Some good laughs, especially concerning Peg traumatizing Bud with her way-too-late mothering effort, and it's always fun to see Al beating up Kelly's boyfriends.
09-09-2010
, 08:22 PM
Season 5, Episode 11: And Baby Makes Money
Synopsis: Peggy reaps immediate benefits when Al learns he can inherit a half-million dollars if he fathers a child and names it after his late uncle Stymie. Unfortunately for Al, Peg decides to take birth control pills, and not tell him.
6.75/10: Some solid laughs in this, the premise is very funny, and watching the life force drain out of Al over the months he's trying to impregnate Peg is excellent, as is the revenge he extracts once he realises she's been on birth control for the whole time.
Dialogue:
----------------
Kelly: Hey, Daddy. Whatcha doin'?
Al: Nothing you need to know, Pumpkin.
Kelly: Ah, a home pregnancy test. Let me show you. Now, you just fill the dropper to the line, and then shake the mix with the anti-HCG conjugate. Put it back into the stand, add the litmus key, and if the test area, not the control area, turns blue, then you have a positive reading.
[Al glares at Kelly who looks embarrassed at how she knows all about the pregnancy test]
Kelly: Uh... I saw the Professor do it on Gilligan's Island.
----------------
Marcy: I don't get it. Why take birth control when you can get five hundred thousand bucks for a Bundy baby boy? Plus what the zoo would pay you for it.
Peg: You know, I wouldn't have another baby if gold dust dripped out of its nose. I mean, sure, the money would be nice, but, I mean, all that trouble... The screaming, the crying, and changing those diapers three or four times a week.
Marcy: Well, at least that left your weekends free.
Peg: You'd think. (SCOFFS) But, I mean, you go away for the weekend, and when you come home they are never where you left them. And then of course there's that ten months of pregnancy.
Marc: Ten?
Peg: Male Bundys never wanna come out. Oh, and then once they're out, they never want to go back in again.
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Al: Oh, for joy. For joy. We are blessed.
Peg: We're what? We're what?
Al: We did it, babe.
Peg: Well, that's impossible. That can't be. I mean, not that I'm not really happy. Oh, God.
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Peg: I feel fat.
Al: Oh, honey, that just means more of you to love. Like a hundred pounds. Gee, I hope you don't get morning sickness again. You know, isn't it, like, every day around this time?
Peg: Gee, I don't feel so good.
Al: Oh, it's gonna be lots of fun. And you'll be beautiful, what with that glow, the varicose veins, and your nose swelling up like a Christmas wino. But honey, as I recall, pregnancy was the happiest time of your life. Well, that and the three years it took you to lose the weight.
Peg: Al, you are a pig.
Al: Yeah, but it won't be me squealing those forty hours during labor.
Synopsis: Peggy reaps immediate benefits when Al learns he can inherit a half-million dollars if he fathers a child and names it after his late uncle Stymie. Unfortunately for Al, Peg decides to take birth control pills, and not tell him.
6.75/10: Some solid laughs in this, the premise is very funny, and watching the life force drain out of Al over the months he's trying to impregnate Peg is excellent, as is the revenge he extracts once he realises she's been on birth control for the whole time.
Dialogue:
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Kelly: Hey, Daddy. Whatcha doin'?
Al: Nothing you need to know, Pumpkin.
Kelly: Ah, a home pregnancy test. Let me show you. Now, you just fill the dropper to the line, and then shake the mix with the anti-HCG conjugate. Put it back into the stand, add the litmus key, and if the test area, not the control area, turns blue, then you have a positive reading.
[Al glares at Kelly who looks embarrassed at how she knows all about the pregnancy test]
Kelly: Uh... I saw the Professor do it on Gilligan's Island.
----------------
Marcy: I don't get it. Why take birth control when you can get five hundred thousand bucks for a Bundy baby boy? Plus what the zoo would pay you for it.
Peg: You know, I wouldn't have another baby if gold dust dripped out of its nose. I mean, sure, the money would be nice, but, I mean, all that trouble... The screaming, the crying, and changing those diapers three or four times a week.
Marcy: Well, at least that left your weekends free.
Peg: You'd think. (SCOFFS) But, I mean, you go away for the weekend, and when you come home they are never where you left them. And then of course there's that ten months of pregnancy.
Marc: Ten?
Peg: Male Bundys never wanna come out. Oh, and then once they're out, they never want to go back in again.
-----------------
Al: Oh, for joy. For joy. We are blessed.
Peg: We're what? We're what?
Al: We did it, babe.
Peg: Well, that's impossible. That can't be. I mean, not that I'm not really happy. Oh, God.
-----------------
Peg: I feel fat.
Al: Oh, honey, that just means more of you to love. Like a hundred pounds. Gee, I hope you don't get morning sickness again. You know, isn't it, like, every day around this time?
Peg: Gee, I don't feel so good.
Al: Oh, it's gonna be lots of fun. And you'll be beautiful, what with that glow, the varicose veins, and your nose swelling up like a Christmas wino. But honey, as I recall, pregnancy was the happiest time of your life. Well, that and the three years it took you to lose the weight.
Peg: Al, you are a pig.
Al: Yeah, but it won't be me squealing those forty hours during labor.