Awesome thread so far.

If this continues with only some derailing, at the end, we might find the cure for fat lazy bitches.

Hide food on bottom shelf of fridge. When she goes to get it slap her ass.

dude your wife is really overweight.. i cant believe you are cool with her being 20lbs overweight.
i wouldnt tolerate it if my gf gained even 5lbs (im being serious).

you wont believe it but 5 lbs on a girl who is 122lb (she is 5'7'' btw) is surprisingly noticeable. she gained like 6 lbs over a month period during december (december is just a long holiday so i guess it's understandable to some degree..) and i had to say somethings to her about the weight gain.

her response was that she was already aware and that i didnt need to tell her about it bc they were going to come off as soon as christmas passes.. i liked her answer and i decided never to bother her about weight ever again. ive been with her two yrs now and last yr she did the same by gaining about 6lbs from thanksgiving to christmas... but she got her weight back down to low 120s within the first two weeks of january. so it seems like she lets loose during the end of the yr... heck i can let that slide.. the change is noticeable but 122 or 128 if you are 5'7" it is definitely tolerable.

the problem with your story is that your wife seem to not care anymore.. she is not making her weight an issue of her own. and that needs to change. i dont have any advice for you but you need to find away make her view weight gain as her own problem and for her to start hating being fat bc (no offense) your wife is really overweight.

yes i sound like an ******* but i work hard to keep myself in shape. i do the bitch ass obliques work out (which i hate doing) just to keep the abs so that i continue to look good. so if shes not going to work out then im going to take it as a sign that she's not living up to her part of the deal. but heck, im cool with her letting loose during the holiday. i can live with that.

henry17 gimmick ITT.

you got it all wrong.

it's buy high and sell low.

wrong.

no u

How nice of you.

Can't believe I'm the first to ask after more than 150 posts...

pics of daughter?

why are you still with him?

take out anger on your son

i've seen dishes deeper than stuff itt

that has been done..... by ngaskin

i really like this advice snoopy. we might have fallen off the beaten path a little. I have been really trying to just cook healthy stuff for us every night and I try to make new dish so we dont get bored. She told me last night out of no where that she appreciated it which did make me feel good and it made me realize that maybe if I did a little more of the other things that she would want to reciprocate. thanks

magical wedding cake anyone. look ur the dumbass that got married. and when u did u said til death do us part. u either had true love forever no matter what or u caved to societal pressure or god knows what. if its the former man up and embrace ur love. if its the latter and u ignored all marriage warnings and information u get what u deserve and u sir are the bitch, as you should be.

omg hot girls at the gym...wtf my wife put on 20 pounds and doesnt dress to attract men anymore. so standard.

i think you are taking this a little too personally. I used the word bitch out of frustration not because I call her that. She is my wife I love her and she gave me a beautiful daughter. I dont think you should be talking about me like you know me. No one said she doesnt like to have sex. Lazy? ill work circles around you, im the most driven person I know. self absorbed? her and my families needs come before mine always. Self entitled? I used to be homeless now I run a million dollar company. I appreciate everything, everyday. My wife may be a little depressed. But you are talking out of that hamburger ass you have and you sound like a troll.

You work at a gym owned by your wife's dad and your idea of a night out is Chilies -- if this statement is true then you need some non-loser friends.

Then why did you start this thread looking for support rather than actual advice on how to make the situation better? You react to any post that even hints that the problem is you -- it is. If you actually care about her what you should be asking is how do I make her feel sexy then you might actually get some good advice rather than just coming off as a complete goof.

Take him to taco bell one time Henry, to show him what an upscale night out looks like!

gym is at work not what we do for business. i was looking for ideas and as i posted earlier there are things that I should do more of. So yes how can I make her feel sexy is a better title. I am reacting to unfounded claims from someone who doesnt know me. I think you can understand that. I have thanked snoopy for her good advice. Im not sure if you have read most of this thread.

I read all your posts which is all that needs to be read. You have to realize that whatever your thought process or intentions are it is not really relevant. You might actually be this great guy that you think you are but what you are communicating isn't that. Your posts make PokerReference's read on you the only read anyone who isn't a misogynistic misanthrope could make. So honestly if you think people's opinions about you are wrong then you have to look at the way you are communicating and acting. Odds are that is likely a major reason why you are having these issues at home as well.

Do you think that's an adequate explanation?


I doubt that you could, but your opinion that you aren't lazy explains your stellar housekeeping record. We aren't talking about jobs here. Do you clean up after you cook, or do you leave that for her? How often do you take your daughter for the evening or a day so your wife can just get out of the house alone? Why did you buy her lingerie that you want to see her in and not what she might feel good in? You can take some consolation in the fact that your wife's problem is nearly universal among women with young children -- it's just that your level of awareness here is absolutely appalling.


This is what your first post says: "Me. Me. Me me me me me me. She's not doing what I want, make it stop." When she's told you she doesn't feel sexy, did you ask why that might be, or for her to recall when she did feel sexy? Because if you haven't, you should, then try as best you can to get the conditions right.

Women don't feel sexy when they're unhappy and bored. So far you haven't demonstrated that the possibility she's unhappy has even occurred to you. Who knows, it might have. Instead, you've written a fair amount of how this affects YOU-- period-- not how this affects you, has anyone else had this, what's at the bottom of it, how did others address it, what worked and what didn't. Your objective shouldn't be high heels and a thong -- those are side benefits to achieving the real objective of bettering your wife's day-to-day life.

the bitch reference was in poor taste and sorry if you were offended by it. Not my intention but I shouldve thought before I spoke. I didnt realize there were so many women in here. I did make this about me, but Im glad i made this thread because it helped me think about the actual root of the problem. Her unhappiness with herself. I should definitely take more time to show her that she is sexy, appreciated and so on.

Our daughter is 2.5 so she goes to bed at 8. But I do wake up every weekend morning with our daughter so she can sleep in. We usually drive to the beach and hang out until she wakes up. Im not thoughtless.

Of course I asked why she doesnt feel sexy. But Ive offered to help her get motivated to change the things she is unhappy about with herself. She complains about her weight mostly but she lacks the drive to change. I cant do anything about that. She has to want it.

And as far as the thongs and heels go. She told me to go buy them. I am a man. I dont think like a woman and so if you say do this to make it happen then that's what I do. Is that really so bad?

But i think your opinion is that she does all the work at home while I sit around and complain about her unsexiness. Which is definitely not the case. I have said that I could do more.

I dont want this to be thread where I have to defend myself. I am actually looking for peoples opinion who have gone or are going through this and what they do. I definitely went about it the wrong way.

OP read this...

Read it over and over again.

Then do it.

for sure.

While she may be unhappy with her extra 20lbs it is more than that. Her life sucks. More than just the weight you need to change that for her. You haven't really gotten into what kind of social life she had but I imagine with a three year old and not working not much of one. She needs friends, she needs to go out, she needs things to do beyond take care of the house and child. You also need to step up the romance. Take her out to dinner at places where they actually have table cloths, send her flowers, if she likes the whole pampering thing send her to the spa for a half day while the grandparents take the child for the day.

RE: thong and heels -- way too much too soon for someone who has even the slightest body issues. You need to build up to that. I like the idea of getting her lingerie but you need to start doing the other stuff first and then when you start with the lingerie in say a month you need to start with stuff that covers up a little more at first until she feels good about herself.

Also a problem that a lot of guys doesn't realize is that we are like a light switch. If a girl comes on to us it doesn't matter what else is going on we are ready to go instantly. With girls you need to start way in advance to make sure she'll be in the mood latter.