Quote:
Originally Posted by Supine
It seldom is a new road tho; you marry someone you've been with a long time (usually). Often you've been living together for a while as well. What changes when you marry? Do you love her less the day before the ceremony?
I think living together long term prior to getting married is a mistake.
My wife and I lived together about 3 weeks prior to our wedding, and that was because the lease started at the beginning of the month and we got married on the 24th.
Half the fun of the first 6 months - year of your marriage is uncovering some of the mysteries about your spouse that you didn't know.
Nothing major, but the little things like 'she always hangs her towel up on this hook after her shower and if I put my towel their she'll move it and put hers there instead' or 'she puts peanut butter on her bread like this and digs it right out of the jar, even though I like to just scrape off the top layer and move down'. Most people would call them stupid little things or meaningless stuff that is either not important enough to know or that they just forget about after they learn it, but that's what makes a marriage a marriage to me.
People who live together for months or even years before getting married already know all the little things about each other like that, it takes all the mystery and fun out of the first few months of marriage where, even though you know and love the person who you've just married, you fall even more deeply in love with them, because you're finding out all the cool little things that add up to them.
So yes, you do love her less before the wedding, even though you don't necessarily mean to or even realize it until much, much later.