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| Puzzles and Other Games Discussions about Puzzles and other non-gambling games |
08-25-2007, 12:06 PM
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#31
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I was in a casino, I was standing by the door, and a security guard came over and said "You're gonna have to move. You're blocking the fire exit." As though if there was a fire, I wasn't gonna run. If you're flammable and have legs, you are never blocking a fire exit.
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08-25-2007, 12:08 PM
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#32
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I don't like grouper fish. Well, they're okay. They hang around star fish. Because they're grouper fish.
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08-25-2007, 12:09 PM
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#33
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I miss the $2 bill, 'cause I can break a two. $20, no. $10, no. $5, maybe, $2? Oh yeah. What do you need, a one and another one?
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08-25-2007, 12:10 PM
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#34
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I called the hotel operator and she said, "How can I direct your call?" I said, "Well, you could say 'Action!', and I'll begin to dial. And when I say 'Goodbye', then you can yell 'Cut!'"
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08-25-2007, 12:12 PM
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#35
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I'm an ice sculptor. Last night I made a cube.
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08-25-2007, 12:12 PM
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#36
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I went to the airport, I put my bag in the x-ray machine, I found out my bag has cancer. It only has six more months to hold stuff.
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08-25-2007, 12:13 PM
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#37
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
Magicians disappear all the time, but as soon as a regular person does it, everyone is all scared. "Tom's gone!" "Is he a magician?" "No." "Then let's print up some flyers!"
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08-25-2007, 12:13 PM
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#38
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I went to a restaurant, and I saw a guy wearing a leather jacket, eating a hamburger, drinking a glass of milk. I said, "Dude, you are a cow. The metamorphosis is complete. Don't fall asleep or I will tip you over!"
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08-25-2007, 12:14 PM
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#39
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Snowboarding concerts and punk music
Join Date: Oct 2003
Posts: 45,328
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re: POG Community Thread
When did Fortuna hack Scott's account?
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08-25-2007, 12:14 PM
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#40
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I want to get a vending machine, with fun sized candy bars, and the glass in front is a magnifying glass. You'll be mad, but it will be too late.
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08-25-2007, 12:16 PM
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#41
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I saw a billboard for the lottery. It said, "Estimated lottery jackpot 55 million dollars." I did not know that was estimated. That would suck if you won and they said, "Oh, we were off by two zeroes. We estimate that you are angry."
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08-25-2007, 12:19 PM
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#42
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Pooh-Bah
Join Date: Dec 2003
Location: river spewing
Posts: 3,641
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re: POG Community Thread
Quote:
When did Fortuna hack Scott's account?
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Mitch Hedberg>>>>>>>>>>> ;>>Fortuna
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08-25-2007, 12:19 PM
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#43
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
If you can't sleep, count sheep. Don't count endangered animals. You will run out.
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08-25-2007, 12:20 PM
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#44
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
A fly was very close to being called a land, because that's what it does half the time.
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08-25-2007, 12:20 PM
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#45
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Carpal \'Tunnel
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: 26 quintillion town
Posts: 6,058
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re: POG Community Thread
I want to rob a bank with a BB gun. "Give me all your money or I will give you a dimple! I will be rich, you will be cute. We both win."
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