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Old 01-20-2017, 10:28 PM   #26
lvanhoe
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Re: Life and career after poker

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Originally Posted by DGAF View Post
Publicly telling someone you don't know who is seemingly depressed to commit suicide is not tough love- it's asinine.
Yeah I'm as far from a SJW as it gets but that was really uncalled for.
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Old 01-21-2017, 01:36 PM   #27
Merlinius
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Re: Life and career after poker

My advice would also be to work part-time while getting a useful degree and pursuing a career in a field of your liking. You clearly have the financial means to do so, and you are definitely still young enough to do so.

Also, and this is only my personal opinion, I would suggest relying more on your own analytical abilities. I think it is good to get input from exceptional people, but I would not put the average counselor in this category.
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Old 01-24-2017, 03:51 PM   #28
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Re: Life and career after poker

I'd be happy to chat on the phone/over Skype with you if you would find it helpful.

(I'm a productivity coach, work with several HSNL players in various stages of transitioning away from poker, spent several years of wandering around in the desert of existential angst post-BF myself.)

Can PM me on your main account or contact me on my site (see my location).
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Old 01-27-2017, 07:52 PM   #29
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Re: Life and career after poker

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I had an exact opposite reaction to my poker career. I played professionally for almost 10 years. I put my wife through college (PHD) and provided for her and my daughter. My wife did work part time or full time during periods of that decade of poker. I now own several businesses that are valued in the tens of millions of dollars. I feel like I owe it ALL to poker. Or at least, I owe it to the way that poker taught me how to think.

No decisions, whether it be over a market strategy, employees, financial, etc... is emotional in any way. I run EV calcs on just about every decision and it has become so ingrained in my decision making that it is just about second nature. I make the best business decision given all of the information that I have, then I execute accordingly until I have new data.

I made Supernova Elite in 6 months playing small and mid stakes and anyone that plays that many of hands of NLH is used to pouring through tons of data. Every situation, vs every type of opponent, from every positions, yada yada.... I do the same thing now with all of my financial statements and key performance indicators. I didn't do it by myself. You can listen about it in this week's pokercast with Matt Wiener. Between him, myself, and Kevin "WizardofAhhs" Thurman, we have an amazing ownership group that is comprised solely on disciplined poker players.

I never reached the mountain top of my poker profession either. I topped out playing 5/10 NLH and occasional 10/25 NLH in live poker after black friday. I couldn't move b/c of my wife's education. I did well in those games but I never amassed a bankroll big enough to do what I wanted. (Fly around the USA/World playing the largest and fishiest games I could find)

I thought I would miss poker a ton but business is just as competitive with way more fish.

tl;dr: Successful businessman b/c of poker acumen.
Perhaps you could give back to poker.

it would be great if there were a successful startup that only hired ex poker players. This would allow players to compete in the business world, resuscitate their resumes, feel like they have purpose and structure again, receive direction from someone they respect, be part of a positive community, operate as part of a team for once, and last but not least, make money.

I'm sure we can all think of a lot of reasons why this would never work but with the right people founding it, could be a tremendous success and with enough results and notoriety could help to legitimize poker in the public eye again.
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Old 01-29-2017, 08:32 AM   #30
QuitPlaying123
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Re: Life and career after poker

Thank you for replying all. Over the next few days I will carefully read everything and reply.

The point I would like to make first is that poker was profitable, but not something I was good at or have accomplished something. Hence I dont feel I have gotten any useful skills out of it, quite the opposite maybe.
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Old 01-31-2017, 12:53 PM   #31
iamallin
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Re: Life and career after poker

Imo you should still play some poker part time till you figure out a good solution.

Play live or softer sites online ..even just 10 hours a week
...but quitting completely without a backup plan is going to make you feel even more unproductive
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Old 02-16-2017, 09:58 AM   #32
Mortey
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Re: Life and career after poker

I'm a first year business student and been playing poker for the past two years. I got a coach from 4 month a go and since then i've been grindinv my way up from 5nl to 25nl and made a roll from live games that i can afford to play up to 1knl live.
However, i've been struggling to stay motivated in my studies seeing the money and the freedom that poker is offering.
My question for you is though, why did you quit poker in the first place? You mention that you wanted to finish your studies and accomplish your long term goals, so maybe i should rather ask why did you start playing? Were you planning to quit once you graduate to get a "real" job and have a "real" life? I mean you have the feeedom in your work that most people don't and you have more savings than most 25 year olds. So why lewve now? And if you were planning to leave from the beginning why put so much work that you can beat the highest stakes?
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Old 02-16-2017, 12:25 PM   #33
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Re: Life and career after poker

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Thank you for replying all. Over the next few days I will carefully read everything and reply.
Hm. Pretty disrespectful to create a topic asking for advice and never replying anymore.
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Old 02-17-2017, 10:37 AM   #34
RunninMan5K
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Re: Life and career after poker

You don't need meds boss, coming from someone who went through counseling and did not take meds to deal with PTSD, anxiety, major depression and probably a few other undiagnosed issues...at the end of the day, and at the beginning, one thing will be consistent if you are alive:

You will breathe.

Simply start where you are, not where you were at, and have a vision for where you want to be?

You have 100K-200K, but no income, correct? Okay, so, eventually, you'll need income.

Besides playing high stakes poker, you have no skill sets, but you have skill sets within that...and I am sure if you thought positively you could name them.

Start where you are bro: write out your actual skill sets but not to an employer, but to you and why they are a skill. Second, take those skills and see what opportunities (not jobs, don't do that) those skills can lead too.

I want to give you an example and hopefully it strikes a cord with you...it may not, because it may be seen as lesser than you are or your potential, but maybe it will help. Last year, I left a job I hated, because I wanted to go to school, get some mental health evaluation from the VA (second time, this time they listened...ughh), and assess the health of my father who was homeless at that time. I am happy to say that besides financial difficulties this year, which I have a great and amazing girlfriend helping with, I was able to accomplish some personal goals that I have not before, and lower, in some ways, my stress level. Recently, things changed in my living situation and a friend said to me "Come back to working what you used to do but just on a different level." He was absolutely right. So, in like 24 hours, I am moving to New Mexico to train some guys on what I used to do in a very normal 9-5 environment. Do I want too? No, but I need too, and it is an atmosphere where I know I will be tested not completely mixed in with some of the bad things that were my vices years ago (alcohol, sexual stuff that is beyond a certain limit, etc.). So...you just have to ask yourself what you want to do that is within your listed skillsets that would make you HAPPY OR WOULD LEAD TO THAT eventual happiness.

I hope it helps...
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Old 02-17-2017, 11:40 AM   #35
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Re: Life and career after poker

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Originally Posted by QuitPlaying123 View Post
I stopped playing poker last year (2015) to focus on finishing my business studies and try to focus on my long term goals. I started playing poker when I was 17 up to 24 years of age. I played up to the highest stakes but did not manage to save a lot or retire.

I have an extremely hard time transitioning back into the real world. Where my student peers have been active with internships, student clubs, international studies, I have merely focused on poker, coaching and some rakeback affiliating. As a result of this perhaps misguided focus I currently do not have a competitive profile at all, because of a lack of internships and a less than stellar GPA.

Poker was a very good way for me to be competitive and reach the top in something. While I did not reach the top like some of the people reading this, I did manage to get to the highest stakes in my games and beat them. Unfortunately I have come to the realisiation that I will not ever be able to reach the top outside of poker. My undergraduate in business is not that valueable at all and I do not have any other skills. Furthermore poker is not something I feel like I can mention on a resume without being frowned upon. Furthermore the perception that poker gave: freedom and the absurd amounts of $$$ at a young age hasnt been very helpful either.

I have talked to a psychologist since quiting poker but this has not been of any help. I have spoken to a therapist, but this has not been of any help. I have spoken to a student councelor, but again this has not been of any help.

Every day I truly wake up with intense amounts of stress and regret of starting poker. I strongly believe that my decision to play poker and my approach to life while playing poker has truly ****ed me up for life. I do not blame poker for this, but I do blame myself for this. Then this regret is even multiplied by the fact that many of my poker peers have done substantially better and have basically set themselves up for life or have found other things they are good at/passionate about. Then this regret is ever more more multiplied by the fact that I see people from my studies going to get nice jobs etc. I have had over a dozen of job interviews so far, without even landing an internship.

The only thing that truly keeps me semi sane is hope for a better future and the fact that I do have some savings 100-200k that can keep me alive for a few years.

I am just wondering if anyone here has experiences something similar and how he or she got out of this mess.

tldr: focused on poker for the past decade, didnt focus on my long term life and studies, stopped playing poker, learned the wrong perception of freedom and $$$ in the normal working world, experiencing great diffeculties lifewise and career wise.
OP, you're getting way too down on your situation...i think you see it as being worse than it actually is.

Firstly, you're still only what, 25? You have plenty of time to get that 'normal life' with a steady job and a girlfriend...it's not like you're coming to this realisation at 40 years old, and even then something could be done.

You're not actually THAT much older than the 'regular' university students and mature aged students is a common thing...like people who decide to travel or pursue other interests, like you with poker, before focusing on their studies. It really is very normal. Plus, barely any of them would have the amount of money you have, especially self made.

12 or so interviews isn't really that big a deal in a competitive environment...and i don't think poker has much to do with it. Eg you admitted your grades weren't good, i'm confident you could improve them over time. Also nailing an interview is a skill in itself...have you researched this so that your presenting yourself the best way possible?

Again, your situation from what i gathered in your OP really doesn't sound that bad...you have more money than most your age, you are still only in your mid 20s and have time up your sleeve to finish your higher education being not that much older than the average student anyway.

I'm sure if you stick at it things will turn around for you in the future.
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Old 02-17-2017, 12:00 PM   #36
jt000
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Re: Life and career after poker

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I just don't get it, how can't you portray positively the fact that you played and beat the highest online NL games for years. This shouldn't be hard at all, unless you actually never studied the game and can't explain how you got to the highest stakes.

I'm still playing poker actively, and actually only being pro for like 7-8 months. My plan is to play poker for 2-3ish years (unless reasonable stakes online cash dies before that) and then head back to uni to finish masters (almost finished bachelors), so would take me 2-3ish years to finish that.

And I'm actually fairly confident I can actually make positive thing out of the poker (unless I go broke lol), by just explaining the various ways I studied the game and got better. Which include database-analysis, solver work, basic math focused on gametheory etc.


Like if I was looking to hire people for work, someone who has reached top of a very competitive area, atleast to me shows tremendous amount of work ethic and ability.
Look, you're right in saying that there are a lot of positive attributes you can say you learned and displayed by playing poker and improving to the highest levels...such as work ethic, problem solving, database analysis and even people skills (reading people, table talk etc).

However, you seem to think it's a no-brainer and every one of your interviewers will love it...which is not the case.

A large part depends of the type of job your applying for and the personality of the actual interviewer...obviously a job involving a lot of number crunching and database analyse, with an interviewer who may be a poker fan themselves, you might do well out of it.

But a lot of interviewers would not understand anything about poker, and despite your attempts to rattle off positives about it, may still think in the back of their minds that it's 'just gambling' at the end of the day, and that your passion for it may suggest you have a gambling problem which could make you a negative persona in the office.

They may know of someone like a friend, cousin, previous workmate etc who's gambling really negatively affected their life and feel passionately against it. Also it would be even harder with a female interviewer, as they tend to disapprove of any form of gambling, including things like sports betting, more than men.

Any form of serious gambling where you're playing high stakes, like even risking $500 in a day, which is basically nothing in the poker world, would be seen very negatively by someone who doesn't gamble as a lot of money to potentially lose...and once you step out of the 'poker world', you'll see that they are right...you can buy a lot of stuff with $500 and once you get a normal full time job as a graduate and stop playing poker seriously, you'll wonder how you dropped $500, $1000, maybe even $3000+ in a day, sometimes in an hour and didn't think much of it since that would now equal quite a large portion of your salary.

To me, since you enjoy poker and no doubt surround yourself with others who do as well, you've detached a bit from the reality of what people who DONT play poker think about it and OP is right, it is generally frowned upon and seen as gambling.

Last edited by jt000; 02-17-2017 at 12:08 PM.
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Old 03-08-2017, 04:05 PM   #37
fadetheflop
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Re: Life and career after poker

I am starting a career readiness program where we mentor and coach individuals trying to get into the work force and start their careers. I am still building the start of this company so if you'd like, my services are available to you for a discount since its before our official launch.

DM me if you want some more information. Best of luck no matter what!!
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Old 03-11-2017, 06:48 AM   #38
QuitPlaying123
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Re: Life and career after poker

I started working with the first job that I got offered. Sorry for not replying but I am not feeling to well and just reading through the topic makes me feel very sick inside. I am also seeing a psychologist for suicidal thoughts but unfortunately he only has time twice a month. I want to quit this job, but have only been on it for 5 weeks and have no alternatives lined up. I regret accepting this job instead of trying two other job interviews which would have taken place after this. I cant let go of this thought, because those would have been far superior jobs.
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Old 03-14-2017, 04:20 AM   #39
QuitPlaying123
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Re: Life and career after poker

Is there anyone who can say something please sorry
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Old 03-14-2017, 04:49 AM   #40
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Re: Life and career after poker

It's just a job don't sweat it too hard. Just look for other jobs since I guess the one you have sucks, and go from there. Maybe you're stuck in a crappy job for a few months while you find something better but it's far from the end of the world. Maybe even try to make sexual overtures towards your bosses wife at corporate parties, worst case scenario your boss just hates you but otherwise you end up cuckolding your boss and either get fired without cause (so you'll get unemployment while seeking new work) or it ends up he's chill with it so you'll wind up in a situation where you're blasting away at your boss's wife while he's watching in the corner drinking mineral water with a metal cage on his dick.

edit: in the gambling world this is whats called a free role

Last edited by Fubster; 03-14-2017 at 04:56 AM.
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Old 03-15-2017, 09:00 PM   #41
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Re: Life and career after poker

do you have the time/money to see a second psychologist/therapist/etc? if so, i recommend that you do that. you may want to talk to one of them (or to your regular doctor) about considering antidepressants or other medications. i don't know what country you're in but perhaps there are special resources that you can look at - suicide hotlines, special counseling, etc

if you have decent money in the bank then you don't have to be working right now. you can look for other jobs while you have this one, or you could quit this one if you want.

i think getting your foundation right (mental health, physical health, etc) is crucial to do first. consider it the #1 goal in your life right now. without a good baseline, you may not be happy/content/successful at anything you do.
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Old 03-20-2017, 02:50 AM   #42
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Re: Life and career after poker

see from the bright side, man, few people can save that much from nothing before 25 years old.

Invest that money, keep studying/looking for an internship and make some cash by playing poker in your free time.

Don't waste money on expensive clothes/cars/houses, invest it in low-risk investments and let the money start working for you.
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Old 03-20-2017, 12:21 PM   #43
CheckedShirt
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Re: Life and career after poker

Move to Europe mate.
Do your university studies for free in Europe.
If you can't do it for free, there is also quite a lot of cool places where you can live as a king for 1.5k/month while doing your studies which will cost like 10k.
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Old 03-21-2017, 12:06 AM   #44
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Re: Life and career after poker

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Originally Posted by BigBadBabar View Post
do you have the time/money to see a second psychologist/therapist/etc? if so, i recommend that you do that. you may want to talk to one of them (or to your regular doctor) about considering antidepressants or other medications. i don't know what country you're in but perhaps there are special resources that you can look at - suicide hotlines, special counseling, etc

if you have decent money in the bank then you don't have to be working right now. you can look for other jobs while you have this one, or you could quit this one if you want.

i think getting your foundation right (mental health, physical health, etc) is crucial to do first. consider it the #1 goal in your life right now. without a good baseline, you may not be happy/content/successful at anything you do.
Absolutely this.

Once a month seeing a psychiatrist isn't going to cut it, especially since psychiatrists largely focus on prescribing medication. I'd suggest seeing a different type of therapist (possibly in addition), one who can focus on talk therapy and who can see you at least once a week. You need to re-frame your thinking, back to how it used to be before this started happening to you, and talk therapy is probably the most effective way to do this.

It sounds like you have enough money in the bank to cover your living expenses at least for the next couple of years. I would also suggest throwing everything you have into improving your mental and physical health, it is without a doubt the most +EV decision you can make right now.
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Old 04-03-2017, 04:49 PM   #45
fscomeau
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Re: Life and career after poker

Quote:
Originally Posted by QuitPlaying123 View Post
I stopped playing poker last year (2015) to focus on finishing my business studies and try to focus on my long term goals. I started playing poker when I was 17 up to 24 years of age. I played up to the highest stakes but did not manage to save a lot or retire.

I have an extremely hard time transitioning back into the real world. Where my student peers have been active with internships, student clubs, international studies, I have merely focused on poker, coaching and some rakeback affiliating. As a result of this perhaps misguided focus I currently do not have a competitive profile at all, because of a lack of internships and a less than stellar GPA.

Poker was a very good way for me to be competitive and reach the top in something. While I did not reach the top like some of the people reading this, I did manage to get to the highest stakes in my games and beat them. Unfortunately I have come to the realisiation that I will not ever be able to reach the top outside of poker. My undergraduate in business is not that valueable at all and I do not have any other skills. Furthermore poker is not something I feel like I can mention on a resume without being frowned upon. Furthermore the perception that poker gave: freedom and the absurd amounts of $$$ at a young age hasnt been very helpful either.

I have talked to a psychologist since quiting poker but this has not been of any help. I have spoken to a therapist, but this has not been of any help. I have spoken to a student councelor, but again this has not been of any help.

Every day I truly wake up with intense amounts of stress and regret of starting poker. I strongly believe that my decision to play poker and my approach to life while playing poker has truly ****ed me up for life. I do not blame poker for this, but I do blame myself for this. Then this regret is even multiplied by the fact that many of my poker peers have done substantially better and have basically set themselves up for life or have found other things they are good at/passionate about. Then this regret is ever more more multiplied by the fact that I see people from my studies going to get nice jobs etc. I have had over a dozen of job interviews so far, without even landing an internship.

The only thing that truly keeps me semi sane is hope for a better future and the fact that I do have some savings 100-200k that can keep me alive for a few years.

I am just wondering if anyone here has experiences something similar and how he or she got out of this mess.

tldr: focused on poker for the past decade, didnt focus on my long term life and studies, stopped playing poker, learned the wrong perception of freedom and $$$ in the normal working world, experiencing great diffeculties lifewise and career wise.
Bro whatever the problem is, I guarantee it's not poker. Poker is a symptom. You don't feel that bad because you played poker for years. Some athletes train for 10+ years and fail at getting a big shot at the big league and don't feel as bad as you. Again, you have some other problems to work on.
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Old 04-11-2017, 06:05 AM   #46
Kurrency
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Re: Life and career after poker

hahaha this cant be serious, what a *****. in fact, I dont buy it. No way hes beating high stakes NL with such a fragile mindset. just another degenerate
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Old 05-30-2017, 07:36 AM   #47
Beasting
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Re: Life and career after poker

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Originally Posted by iamallin View Post
Imo you should still play some poker part time till you figure out a good solution.

Play live or softer sites online .
Any suggestions as the where, for US players? Ignition was soft enough for me, but I'm a HU cash game specialist and their new HU policy has essentially put me out of a job.
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Old 06-18-2017, 04:04 PM   #48
dkbball126
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Re: Life and career after poker

I'm in the same spot and I've had an awful hard time transitioning as well.... Still have not found a decent job for myself, but, trying to pursue something I have a little interest in.... Life gives you many chances. You can always go back to school at some point. Hang in there...
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Old 06-20-2017, 03:47 PM   #49
Beasting
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Re: Life and career after poker

I've been trying to quit poker for a while. It's a vicious cycle. Like OP, I feel that years of playing online has ruined me. I have no interest in any day jobs. I can't stand the idea of having to be somewhere everyday from 9-5. Yet being at home playing online poker is even more damaging IMO. I search for jobs, get depressed at what I find, then reluctantly go back to poker much in the same way a user goes back to a drug. Occasionally I see a job that I think I might enjoy, I apply, get no response back, get depressed again, then go back to poker. As far as "likes" the only thing I might get passionate about doing is coaching a team (basketball), or flying commercially (which was my life-long ambition). I can't fly (for reasons I'd rather not going into itt), and coaching at the college level or beyond requires years of experience and tons of lucky breaks. Really helps to know people/have connections too, and I have none. So aside from those, neither of which are achievable, I really have no desires, and hence I slave away at poker, very unsatisfied with what I've done with my life. I don't know of a way out, but there's got to be one.

Thanks for hearing that rant.

TL;DR: Can't find career happiness in poker, can't find it outside of poker.
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Old 06-21-2017, 12:56 AM   #50
Yeti
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Re: Life and career after poker

you don't need to be passionate about your job. very few people are. just get a job. you will make friends, make money, get experience, and will quickly become a 'normal person' who operates on normal hours. in a couple of years you'll look back at the time you spent playing poker and it will seem pretty strange and like a different person's life.

i don't know anything about you, your finances, or your education, so there are certainly quite a lot of assumptions in this post. but this is likely to be the best advice. with that said, the most likely outcome is that you will ignore it now and be forced to do it later.
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