Quote:
Originally Posted by FWWM
Pretty sure if I met MTT and had to listen to him like 5 mins IRL it would tilt me a like thousand times more than anything has ever tilted me at a casino
Yeah this +1000
"So I was in the cafe last night grinding the game, as you do"
"Wait doesn't that cafe shut at 5pm?"
"It's always night in the poker room bro. So yeah as I was saying I was grinding the game and I flop a set of jacks. Easy game. I check back the flop to let "the vill" bet the turn so he can find out where he's at"
"Wait what's the v-, actually, never mind go on"
"So yeah "the vill-"
"Come on dude no one call-"
"Stfu it's about to get seriously sick, this isn't just your everyday poker hand. So the villain bets pretty big on turn, it's a brick so I'm not worried, I still have top set. I just call because I want him to bluff river. The river falls and he jams for 28, it's three to a straight with no flush draws and immediately I go into the tank and start tilting"
"Wow **** man, that is actually pretty sick, 28 dollars must be a pretty big overbet for the stakes you're playing, what was the pot on river like 6?"
"It was 28 cents."
"Wait what?!"
"Yeah the river jam was 28 cents"
"The pot must of been a few dollars man how the **** did this even happen? More importantly, what the **** are you waiting for?"
"I just had a massive feeling I was beat man. I just looked at him and he gave me the same look he gave my mum and dad when he came around to my pad-
"Your parents house"
"It's my pad man"
"Dude you live in the ****ing basement of your parents house and there's mold all over the walls.. and you've got a ****ing cum stain on the cover of that "Ace on the river" book, I know your gay and all and that's fine but Barry dude? Didn't know you were into bestiality"
"Yeah yeah whatever, anyway the vill came around for a BBQ a couple months ago, I overheard that a spit roast was on offer but I never saw anything of the sort, just the usual **** burgers and hot dogs. But yeah he just gave me the exact same look he gave me that whole afternoon. I knew he just hit his gutshot.."
"Come on man, you must be getting like 40 to one"
"I folded and showed him my hand"
"And??"
"Well he didn't show but I'm pretty sure I saved myself 28 cents. I felt pretty crazy after folding and thought it would be best to use my comps to get my favourite m-"
"What comps? When did the cafe ever do comps, it's a ****ing cafe and they don't even get any of the rake, it goes to some random Persian guy who runs the game doesn't it?"
"Well it's not really comps but every so often I pool some money together and treat it like a comp. I like to think that very 28 cents went into that lasagna I ate later on that night"
"It's not nigh-, **** it I don't even care anymore.."
"So yeah their lasagna is the nuts man, I ask them to chuck it in the freezer for me 30 minutes before I chow down so it also acts like a dessert, you know the whole ice lolly thing, I'm actually thinking of going on Shark Ta-"
"FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKK"