I just hate anything you post.

LOL @ you whinging about someone else wasting your time.

What are the session fees at 10c/20c you goose?

Everytime I see "passwordgothacked" as the most recent poster I just know it's my stalker spewing dog vomit with zero constructive remarks.

If you must know, we don't pay anything at the .1/.2 but we got harassed by the owners every now and then to buy something. Big winners also get begged for tips at the end of the night. I don't play there anymore. I am well rolled for the 2/5 now after my Poker and sport book run good.

The big winners hey?

The fact you still refer to anyone playing 10c/20c as big winners pretty much guarantees you have no idea and will probably be playing 10c/20c for the rest of your life.

Which is fine if you can finally admit that and that $20 here and there changes your life.

It is also fine that people find this ****ing hilarious

Well relatively speaking, $400-$500 is pretty "big" at the 20NL. You keep insisting and convincing yourself that some dude on the internet actually sweats the live 0.1/0.2 after I've repeatedly told you this was just for comedy and I normally play the 2/5 or 5/10.

1. When people take their dinner break or whatever, for 30 minutes to an hour, come back, and then immediately rack up their chips and leave. I hate you.

2. When people announce their hand at showdown with its "nickname". (I actually hate it when people overuse hand nicknames in general. Extra I-hate-you points if you toss it in as a comment about a hand someone lost. If someone loses with AK, it's in really poor form to chuckle and say, "Heh, heh, ol' Anna Kournikova... ...looks good, but never wins, right guys?" Good one. Never heard that one before. Drop dead.)

3. When people beat up on the dealer for their "luck".

4. Making the table "unstable" with constant smoke breaks. Is it 9-handed? Is it 6-handed? Is it 4-handed? Who even knows? I actually don't care about the smoking itself. I smoke. I'll even bum you one later. But if half of the table is rotating out every 15 minutes, threatening to break up the table, it drives me bonkers.

5. When people stand up after their big blind, and we're in a room with the travelling blinds rule. You paid for it, you might as well sit through your button anyway.

6. This one isn't people, but it's sort of related, because I find some slots players annoying. If the poker room happens to be near a slots bay, and you're near the edge of the room, it will only be a (short) matter of time before you want to take a hammer and do awful things to the nearest machine to stop the looping music and sound effects.

1. When someone puts a bad beat on you and celebrates it or gets aggressive about it. Recently had a guy call me All-in pre with AQ while I was holding AA. He busted me and started thumping the table yelling, "Yes! Woohoo!" etc.

Wasn't the fact that he busted me that is annoying, it's him celebrating getting all-in in a really bad spot then sucking out, then acting as if he achieved something awesome.

2. Guys pretending. Pretending they're experienced or awesome poker players while playing like whales. There's usually a good deal of them too. All trying to impress each other with their "obvious poker experience". Flicking chips around, throwing their cards and/or chips three feet in the air when they fold, etc. and all playing worse than the average 5NL online player.

3. Throwing your cards three feet in the air when you fold, period. WTF. Just slide them over the line.

4. Guys (and dealers) who are totally anal about string betting. There's the slightest click when you put a raise in and they yell string bet. As if you were really actually trying to pull one on them.

Seriously +1.

come on u 2 bhave

Yeah there's one bloke at my local casino who always plays the minimum buy-in, plays a half decent short-stack strategy but he's always wandering off, having conversations with other regs, watching other games, etc. It doesn't really annoy me that much, but I do wonder why he bothers playing at all sometimes.

Gold hahah

... people who say, "nice hand" every time they lose a pot. Even if the winning hand isn't really that nice.

I nearly have a ****ing aneurysm when people refer to Jacks as "Johnnies."

"Wasn't much I could do there with my Johnnies/ace Johnny etc" I HOPE YOU GET A ****ING THERMOMETER BROKEN OFF IN YOUR URETHRA

Can I get a thread of just those two ****ting on each other?

I hate obvious drug dealers who buy in with a bunch of 5s and 10s.

I hate anyone who asks HOW MUCH DOES HE HAVE "he has you covered" YEAH BUT THAT DOESN'T ANSWER MY QUESTION HOW MUCH DOES HE HAVE when they are calling an all in or after they lose an all in. **** you, I am not wasting everyone's time counting it down to the dollar. You have like 140 and he clearly has well over 200 you stupid ****ing cheap weak tight old **** man coffee

The last time I saw one of those, with the classic pulling out of the wad of 1's/5's/10's, the dude also just sort of dumped down a bunch of additional chips he happened to have on the table (in a $3-$6 FLHE game), including some greens and some of the $2.50 chips they use for blackjack. The dealer immediately gave half the table the "oh hell" look.

They're always douche bags too, no table etiquette. Trash talking when they win. Tip very little if at all.

There's a notorious coke dealer that I always have to deal to who seems to think I'm his ****ing friend, never shuts up. When he first started playing he'd keep his halves and then put two in for his small blind, so the dude next to him replaces it with a dollar and throws the halves in the bucket. Eventually he finally got shamed into tipping a little bit. The other day he got a beef dip for 12.60 and gave the waitress 13 dollars and said "the rest is for you" and she looked at me and rolled her eyes. So I said "hey Joyce I've got a tip for you...dont eat yellow snow"

The rest of the table laughed...wooshed right over his head

Had a guy, estimating mid 40s, at 2/5 who limped EP, gets two callers and me in the BB (I got 26o) Flop is 228 he bets 20, goes fold, fold and I call. Turn 8. Check, check. Blank river, he checks I bet small and he folds by THROWING his cards in the air, one of which smacks the dealer in the face before starting on a rant about how my bet was "childish" and this is an "adults game" for a couple minutes. Now it should be noted that I'm quite young, probably the youngest at the table. But this guy is also a well known loud mouth and complainer in the room, and I'm a bit talkative but never really rude to anyone.

I probably woulda just said something like "yeah how childish of me to bet with the best hand" but since he threw his cards at the dealer and was being so aggressive I said something more like "Sir I'm like half your age and your acting more childish than me by far" which apparently tilted him enough to leave the table. Which was GREAT because he was directly on my left and wouldn't shut his mouth (again I'm more than talkative but I'm not complaining 24/7.)

I'm not really sure why I wrote all this out but yeah, I guess it tilts me when people are outright that disrespectful. I mean seriously if you can throw your cards and let one smack the dealers face without apologizing, screw you, you're just a terrible person.

Usually I'm the token black guy at every table, everytime I play poker. It gets tilting as hell hearing white guys tell me which famous black guy I look like/remind them of. 99% of the time there's zero resemblance. I just take it as this socially awkward clown's chance to "show the black guy he's cool with the brothers" because he has a black friend back home. I've been told I look like everyone from Cuba Gooding Jr to Don Cheadle, Lebron James, Barry Sanders, a young Martin Luther King Jr., "That one rapper guy I can't think of, his name escapes me", "That one singer guy that was in that one movie", "That basketball player that used to play for the (insert NBA team here)"

This happens about 75% sessions I've played for the past 10 years of my life. It gets old.... if you do this, please drive home in reverse when you leave the poker room.

Is that you in the avatar? If so you look a lot like that black dude from Bad Santa.. Bernie Mac I think he's name was. That's actually pretty awesome dude. I took a day off work for MLK weekend and I have a colleague who is of Haitian origin. I also think Phil Ivey is one of the best poker players out there.

Peace brother.

GOAT post lol. Avatar is from the a Captain Morgan commercial

LOL

In my defence its hardly just me who thinks he is a clown

The guys sounds like he has no clue.

It ****s me when people throw their cards, period. There's a whole heap of regulars at my local casino that seem to think it's cool to hoist their cards three feet into the air every time they fold. Apparently the higher you can throw them without anyone seeing, the cooler (and obviously more experienced/better poker play you are). Obviously this "trick" back-fires on a semi-regular basis. Doesn't stop them doing it though.

I make a point of simply sliding them over the line towards the dealer.

Probably upset that you bet after he checked the river when you were first to act...

+1

Your post is the first time in my life I've ever heard JJ referred to as Johnnies.