At Harrahs AC, table 13, this guy in the 10 seat is without a shadow of a doubt, the most annoying mf'er I have ever sat with. I have NEVER seen 1 person slow down a game so much. 5 people limp, it gets to him, the dealer has to tell him 3 times its on him, at which point he replies "who raised? How much is it." Every fckn time. He's got the entire donk ensemble on, Ceasers jacket, wsop hat, giant imitation Kanye West $3 boardwalk sunglasses on. Every time his phone rings, has to make a huge show of answering it, as if he's impressing everyone that he's a vip getting a phone call. Has to make a giant show out of tipping the dealer, as if everyone is in awe of the high roller tipping $3 on a $20 pot. Has pulled off 3 scumbag slow rolls already because he has to milk every second of attention he can get. Has a dorky looking diamond elephant card protector, has some sort of diamond jewelry on every stack of chips, and has a fake looking gold chain draped over his chips, which means he has to slow every hand down while he unentangles a chip to call. I seriously want to rip his dick off and beat him with it, to make sure he doesn't reproduce, so that his kids don't slow down my kids tables 30 years from now. You're sitting at a $1/$2 table, with $400. You're not on tv. You SUCK. Just shut the f up, and play. How the hell do some people not realize how inconsiderate they are, or just not care? If this douchebag has a heart attack at the table, I swear to god I will fight off any paramedic that tries to save him.

If I had to watch my mother get spread eagled on the table right in front of me and get gang banged by the entire NY Knicks organization, with Eddy Curry pulling up the caboose, it would be less painful that watching this jackoff.

sounds like he is doing a good job of tilting you. Is he winning your money too?

glad i put you on tilt.

an 8 on the rant scale.
nice work.

lol.
rant on.

Why are you stuck at the table? Can't you just ask for a table change? Can't you play something other than NLHE?

quality rant imo

Nah, I'm not even card dead, I'm card rigor mortis, which is magnifying how annoying he is. There's 8 people at the table about to jump over the table and choke him, and 1 old man sleeping. If we played more then 4 hands an hour, he might very well get my money.

Yeah just change tables, shouldn't be that big a deal, idiots like that just happen. Let it go.

I'm stuck here because I am now on a mission, on behalf of all that is good and right with poker, to bust this pr!ck. And after I bust him, I am going to climb up on the table, unzip my jeans, whip it out and unleash an unholy fury of urine on him.

Plus, this is the only table I can see the baseball game from right now.

It's trully amazing the people that you meet at a poker table.

Hold on, are you posting from the table? If so, this rant just quadrupled in awesomeness.

Agreed.