no way

more emails plz

From a long time ago, probably posted before...

Aint nothing like rippin on chuck norris

Brilliant thread. lol @ the jacket person =/

----- Original Message -----
From:
Sent: 2008/03/22 11:11:26
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: Efficiency in energy transfer

>Dear Mr PokerStars support,
>
>I'm experiencing serious trouble *right now!
>
>
>*As I was playing one of your exciting play money table, I suddenly
>realized that my kettle was emitting some disturbing sound.
>
>Do you guys think it may related to the water reaching its
>boiling temperature?
>
>Thank you very much for your precious help.
>
>Nicolas
>


Hello Nicolas,

Thank you for contacting us.

Likely combination of the water boiling causes steam. When the steam is
released, likely through the spout on the kettle, it's not uncommon for
this to create some noise.

Hope this helps, have a great day.

Regards,

JeffreyA
PokerStars Support Team

Gosh, takes very little to impress some people.

np_malcolm, seriously good.

someone ask stars support where babies come from

they've prlly all been fired now great post

No way, for so many of them to be awesome, it indicated that the company is most likely looking for awesome support like them. They get a billion questions, but when they get more the company probably hires more instead of saying "Get it done", therefore they have the time to be awesome, and the company endorses it. At least, that's what I'd like to believe. Someone should ask them, because I'm sure they'll have an awesome response.

ftp support has been pretty awesome lately. see becks911 + ponies:

http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/sh...postcount=3551

http://forumserver.twoplustwo.com/sh...postcount=3705

the best one was phillip the one legged midget, i laughed for a long time

I just sent one!

Hello Matt,

Please be informed that in relation to your first query I have
forwarded
your email onto the tournament administration team.

Finally in relation to scoring the Auzzie ladies, my advise is to
concentrated more on the poker and making cash. Then the Auzzie ladies
will
come to you, from my experience they are very materialistic.

Please let us know if we can be of further assistance.

Kind Regards,
Hugo
Cake Poker Support




-----Original Message-----
From:
Sent: Sunday, March 23, 2008 2:41 PM
To: support@cakepoker.com
Subject: Increasing limits

Hi

I emailed you awhile back about creating higher pot
limit omaha 8 tables. I think people would be
interested in playing on these and they would also
draw more people to the site. I imagine it would take
very little effort on the part of the site and would
creat more profit so Im struggling to see the downside
of this. I hope you guys look into this issue and get
it resolved shortly.

Also Im in Australia now, but haven't been able to
pick up any Aussie girls yet. They are very pretty
and I would really like 'get with' one of them. Do
you have any pickup tips Mr. or Mrs. Support person?

great thread..

hahahahahha holy **** that's beyond awesome

11/10

Some of these are priceless.

"Hello Kevin,

Thanks for the email.

With regards to your suggestion, we always appreciate it when our players
think of new ideas for our site. I have forwarded your email to our 'ideas'
department who will give it further consideration."


AKA the trash

the pic of hostStevenB is freaking awesome

Hello ,

Thank you for emailing us.

In regards to your deposit, I have forwarded your email to our deposit
assistance department. They will contact you as soon as possible with more
information in regards to the cards.

In regards to the second question, do I have any kind of transport or
weaponry? Do I *HAVE* to fight them? It's a well known fact that you can
avoid a grizzly bear attacks by playing dead, so I would try my chances
with a grizzly bear, and try and act dead, than fight a black panther.

If I had a weapon, and it was a survival issue, I could then shoot the
bear/panther, or, if I had a car or a motorbike, I could out run it.

There are simply too many factors to consider when trying to answer this
question accurately. Is the Panther like Snuggle Puss, or is he a lean
mean fighting machine, like Panthro from Thundercats?

Can I call Chuck Norris for backup?

If you have any more questions or concerns, please don't hesitate to
contact us.


Regards,

JeffreyV
PokerStars Support Team

----- Original Message -----

>Hi Stars Support,
>
>I have two problems:
>
>1) I've been having trouble trying to deposit money into my account. I
have
>a MasterCard debit card that I tried to use previously which got rejected,
>and then today I bought a prepaid VISA gift card since my friend told me
>they work, but that also doesn't work (as evidenced by the below message
>from the cashier). I don't want to have to pay more fees to use one of the
>e-wallets. What should I do?
>
>and 2) I don't know which I would rather fight, a panther or a bear. The
>panther would be a standard black panther (agile, quick, sharp claws), and
>the bear would probably be a grizzly (huge, also faster than a human, also
>sharp claws). Which would you rather fight?
>
>Yours,
>

I should have been more specific with the fight. I meant unarmed with no sort of escape vehicle, and you HAD to fight your choice, sort of like a roman coliseum except you get to choose your opponent.

>First off hi to all the Pokerstars Support Staff members!
>
>Recently I've been facing some difficult problems and your team is the
only one that can help me with this.
>When I was playing poker about a week ago I had some kind of enlightment.
I realized that I need to create a new religion that worshipes the entire
pokerstars support team! I already stepped out of church, but I don't know
how I can create a new religion. Where do I have to go to in order to
accomplish this? I'm also having some problems to finish my own personal
shrine in my room dedicated to your team. Could you send me some personal
things from some members of your team like a used sock, some underwear,
used toiletpaper or atleast a picture I can worship to? And I didn't come
up with a name yet. Maybe you have some ideas...
>
>Thanks in advance, your holyness.


Hello Thomas,

Thank you for contacting PokerStars.

We are pleased to hear that you have chosen to dedicate your life to us
here at support. While I am not one to support idol gods I totally respect
your decision. Now that you have chosen to start your own religion we need
to take the next step.

I recommend visiting 'http://www.apath.org/creating_religion.html' for
more information on how to proceed.

I'll ask around the office in regards to 'religious artifacts', but there
are certainly no guarantees.

Your god has spoken. That is all.

Regards,

Dean
PokerStars Support Team

This.

Great additions to the thread lately. Don't think I have anything good to send myself atm though. Keep it up guys.

Do you also call 911 and ask for the time??

I, for one, welcome our new overlords