STars support staff wins again - Page 5 - Poker Beats Brags and Variance

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STars support staff wins again

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03-05-2008 , 09:57 PM

#101

Zorlac

journeyman

Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 349

Wow. Did the polar bears and killer whales eat them all?

Lucky we can still see them at the zoo.

.Z

Quote

03-05-2008 , 10:42 PM

#102

MaKiaVeli

centurion

Join Date: Sep 2007 Posts: 126

A++ thread, made my day, thanks guys

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03-05-2008 , 10:46 PM

#103

Conan776

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Jul 2007 Posts: 3,748

Wat?

No way this is fake

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03-05-2008 , 10:52 PM

#104

blind squirrel

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 8,194

^^^ Awesome piece

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03-06-2008 , 03:10 AM

#105

HoldThem

banned

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 1,094

godamn it they cant unlock my account now, i wonder if i sign up again will it let me

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03-06-2008 , 04:34 AM

#106

JavaNut

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 4,427

Quote:

Originally Posted by Conan776

Wat?

No way this is fake

Sorry it is obviously a fake, as beer will go bad if it is frozen, as it will be if the picture was genuine. Polar Bears aren't that stupid, that they will let their beer go bad.

As for the penguin in the picture, it has been caught down south and exported to the north pole, ldo. Penguins can be purchased at the north pole from the PolarBearDelicatessen Inc., c/o Santa Claus, North Pole.

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03-06-2008 , 05:11 AM

#107

m_reed05

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Oct 2006 Posts: 8,611

Quote:

Originally Posted by JavaNut

[x] Tried to hard.

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03-06-2008 , 10:50 AM

#108

uneek77

enthusiast

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 56

Quote:

Originally Posted by auc hincloss

This post MAY or MAY NOT deserve more love.

Im not sure yet.

it means happy passover to everyone...

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03-06-2008 , 11:00 AM

#109

il_martilo

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 4,137

This thread is incredible. Can't wait to read the 2nd half later.

Anyone feeling a competition between FTP support and Stars support for hilarious responses?

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03-06-2008 , 11:02 AM

#110

il_martilo

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Nov 2007 Posts: 4,137

Quote:

Originally Posted by HoldThem

Well my one backfired:

----- Original Message -----
From: xxxx
Sent: 2008/03/05 10:30:20
To: support@pokerstars.com
Subject: Hi there

>Hi,
>
>My account username is Gullanian. I recently self excluded myself again
>because I am worried about my gambling.
>
>Anyway I was wondering, is the Antartica a continent, and if it is, when
it
>melts from global warming will people delete if off maps? Also, Antartica
>is in the north what's in the south, is that a continent as well? And are
>penguins found north or south?
>
>Many thanks
>
>Tom
>

Hello Thomas,

Thank you for your email, though we're sorry to hear you're having
difficulties.

It came to our attention that on your most recent email you clearly
state "I recently self excluded myself again because I am worried about my
gambling"

I have permanently closed your account; it will not be reopened under any
circumstances. We wish you the best in your recovery. If you are
interested, we would like to suggest two excellent organizations that can
offer support and counseling services for those who feel gambling have had
an impact in their lives:

Gamblers Anonymous, which can be found at:

http://www.gamblersanonymous.org/

GamCare, which can be found at:

http://www.gamcare.org.uk/

Best wishes to you, and if there is anything else we can help you
with, please let us know.

Regards,

Gustavo
PokerStars Support Team

That sucks pretty hard, stars is the only site that does $10 deposits so now I gotta deposit $50

owned by stars support staff.

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03-06-2008 , 02:37 PM

#111

NozeCandy

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 29,251

Initial e-mail:

Quote:

Hello,

My dog recently died (RIP Rupert), and I've decided to take up poker to honor his memory. He loved to chew playing cards and I think it is an appropriate medium through which to express my grief. However, all the poker sites generally seem the same to me, so I have e-mailed the support staffs of several major sites with the following request: compose a haiku that will soothe my pain in addition to explaining why I should play poker at your site. The best poem gets all my money.

Regards,
Scott

Response, 3 hours later:

Quote:

Hello Scott,

Thank you for your email.

PokerStars is well known for the high levels of customer service we
provide our players. So instead of writing just one haiku, we had our
whole support team write one and here are the best two:

Rupert is now gone
He was outdrawn on the turn
Now he is allin

----------------------------

Sorry 'bout Rupert
We have cards he cannot chew
Scott will like it here

We welcome you to PokerStars! When making your first deposit, you may
enter the bonus code 'First2008' to receive a 100% match bonus, up to a
maximum of $50. You may view the complete terms and conditions of this
bonus on our website located at:

http://www.pokerstars.com/poker/promotions/bonus/

We wish you the best of luck at the tables and thank you for choosing
PokerStars.

Regards,

Tim
PokerStars Support Team

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03-06-2008 , 02:41 PM

#112

Gildwulf

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 23,491

lmao at haiku

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03-06-2008 , 02:57 PM

#113

Pasterbator

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 10,241

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gildwulf

lmao at haiku

haha yea good stuff.

Quote

03-06-2008 , 02:58 PM

#114

Speel Posher

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 7,355

omg that haiku is amazing.

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03-06-2008 , 03:10 PM

#115

Xaston

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Oct 2005 Posts: 4,529

haha that haiku is gold.

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03-06-2008 , 03:23 PM

#116

swissheep

adept

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 723

Quote:

Originally Posted by The 13th 4postle

Quote:

There are no penguins at the north pole.

He speaks the truth...

Oh yeah I was thinking about the french word pingouin, which is Auk in English. Thought penguin was used for both
</offtopic>

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03-06-2008 , 03:39 PM

#117

NozeCandy

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jul 2006 Posts: 29,251

Yeah, I wasn't planning on it, but I might actually have to make a deposit at PS after that response.

Quote

03-06-2008 , 04:22 PM

#118

cowpig

veteran

Join Date: May 2007 Posts: 2,162

Quote:

Originally Posted by NozeCandy

Yeah, I wasn't planning on it, but I might actually have to make a deposit at PS after that response.

I just can't not play on stars. Their staff is just too awesome.

Quote

03-06-2008 , 04:29 PM

#119

swissheep

adept

Join Date: Feb 2008 Posts: 723

This needs a contest for most entertaining question/response imo. I already vote for leather jacket guy and the haiku.

Quote

03-06-2008 , 04:29 PM

#120

cooker3

adept

Join Date: Jul 2005 Posts: 990

I really actually want to play on stars now because of this
<3 to customer support

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03-06-2008 , 06:10 PM

#121

ICMoney

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Sep 2005 Posts: 8,278

...Now he is all in

hahahhahahaha

Glad I'm back on PS.

pwnage

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03-06-2008 , 06:28 PM

#122

Sciolist

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: Jun 2005 Posts: 17,526

Quote:

Originally Posted by HoldThem

godamn it they cant unlock my account now, i wonder if i sign up again will it let me

Try linking this thread when you asked to be reinstated

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03-06-2008 , 06:51 PM

#123

bacats32

Pooh-Bah

Join Date: Dec 2005 Posts: 5,603

this thread might be better then tworooks this stuff keeps me laughin

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03-06-2008 , 06:52 PM

#124

lippy

Carpal \'Tunnel

Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 8,323

OMG THE HAIKUS ARE ****ING AMAZING

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03-06-2008 , 07:41 PM

#125

thesilkworm

old hand

Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 1,747

Here's an old one:

Quote:

> Dear Pokerstars,
>
> When 2007 began, I was delighted to see my doom switch had been
reversed. There was a celebration in honor of Pokerstars (a fiesta, if
you will) because I had actually started to cash in tournaments again.
>
> However, on January 6th, 2007 the switch was reset once more. This was
the day I saw a picture of Lee Jones in a Hawaiian shirt at the PCA - I
believe it to be the culprit.
>
> Thanks for your attention to the matter.
>
> Best,
>
> PokeHerPros

Quote:

Hello PokeHerPros,

Thank you for your e-mail.

As I'm sure you know, the whole "doomswitch/boomswitch" thing is a myth.
We have no control over the cards.

I do however agree that seeing a picture of Lee Jones in a Hawaiian shirt
is almost certainly the cause of your poor results recently. As soon as
you can get that image out of your head, I am confident you will soon get
back to winning ways! :-)

Regards,

Stuart W
PokerStars Support Team

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