http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8r1CZTLk-Gk

Dude I absolutely love Louis ck, although sometimes his jokes about his kids start getting a lil awkward, Watch 'Talking Funny' on yewtewb.

He uses the N word, talks about how much he hates his daughter .... yeah it's pretty brutal, but at the same time he is so effing funny.

"Saddest handjob" may be the best piece of comedy ever written and performed.

nahhh, I think he has wayyyy better jokes, but I guess if you are old and married and ****, it might be really funny... Anyway, we disagree on almost everything. Also, he is the only white guy who can say ****** without raising eyebrows, They talk about that in the talking funny video , Its him, Ricky G, Seinfeld and Chris rock .
Also, See a shrink bro,

Unless it's a very bizarre coincidence, you thought Aliens because Michael Biehn plays a similar character in both films and is the guy who said the line in Terminator. It probably means you need to go watch Aliens and Terminator again. It's okay, the thread can wait.

this guy is hilarious,thanks mate

I realize I come across as crazy sometimes, particularly when I am stoned, but I'm actually pretty normal. Well, at least given my history. I'm not looking for sympathy, and I don't care if something I said makes you dislike me. I'm just telling stories. Read them, or don't. Up to you.

I have seen that interview and him saying, "You're saying I'm a n*****." made me a little uncomfortable. I'm not saying he's a racist, I'm just saying it's a pretty harsh word to be using, as a white guy. But part of what makes Louis CK funny is that he has no boundaries.

Also, I have seen several shrinks. The biggest problem is, I am usually playing head games with them the whole time, so nothing ever really gets accomplished.

Give an example of your mind games with the shrink.

One time I had a shrink who believed that using hypnosis you could actually visit past lives. So, I pretended it was working and made up this elaborate story about some cowboy.

Seemed like a better way to kill the hour than sit there and talk about why I hate everyone. People suck, and unless that changes, modifying my thinking to believe otherwise is just ignoring reality.

The "Ask a Cop" thread in OOT got me thinking. I have lots of good stories where I got in minor trouble with the cops. I'm gonna tell you the very first one.

I was about 17 years old, so it was 1987. One summer night, I dared my friends to all jump the wall with me at the local Universities diving pool and jump off the 10 meter. It's 30 feet, you can actually hurt yourself, just by impacting the water wrong. Anyway, we all jumped the wall ... there was 4 of us, and we climbed up, and while up there we saw the cop car ... "Cops! Jump! Jump!" and without thinking, last in line, fully dressed, I jumped too. We immediately jumped the wall, and 2 of my friends ran off towards campus while myself and another friend went to my car, fully clothed, soaking wet. The cops saw us crossing the street.

Not real cops, University cops. One of these guys once told me that I needed a Chaufers license to deliver pizza once. Anyway, so these cops see us before we can get away, and the cop is all, "We have a witness, that you didn't know was there, that saw you 2 jumping off the 10 meter board. Are you aware of what the penalty is for lying to a police officer?" We were claiming that we were running in the sprinklers and that's why we were wet.

And since I knew he was lying, because there was 4 of us ... I said, "Are you aware of what the penalty is for lying to a suspect? It's called entrapment!"

I didn't know shiat, and I was wrong ... cops are allowed to lie to you. But somehow this guy let me go, even though I could not find my wallet or provide any ID besides my car registration and insurance.

Turns out my wallet was in the back pocket of my jeans, and given the situation, I never took it out. Thought I left it in my car and it got stolen, but it squirted out of my back pocket and sunk to the bottom of the pool when I hit the water.

So, like a week later, ding dong. I answer the door, it's the same 2 cops. They found my wallet and they want to talk to my father. Bad move.

My Dad comes to the door, "Do you have any idea who I am!? I'm a law professor for the University you work for. Are you seriously telling me that you are here to investigate the possible crime of my son jumping in a godamn swimming pool!?"

I had never been so proud of him in my life. I had done something bad. I was wrong, but he was standing up for me. I got like a $15 fine and before the cops left my house I was like, "Hey ... you think I can get my wallet back? Got my drivers license in it." and they were all, "Yeah ... I guess."

Thanks!

There was this time, he was all, "It's not your fault." and I was like, "Duh, I know dipshiat!" and he kept going, saying, "It's not your fault." and I was like, "I know dude .... why would it be my fault?!" and he kept saying it over and over .... and now I think ... it mighta been my fault.

I have seen that movie.

So many ways your off..geez
A young BOY who never will get to go to new york will get shot in the head today in Afganistan, he's 19, a marine....
Think about him...really dwell on it...your a selfish whiny unappreciative eternally out of focus annoying regular person!!!
The only reason Im here is cause I couldnt sleep, pulled up todays posts, smoked a j, discovered the poker after dark thats on is a crappy boring one, (david grey one), and got sucked into your standard run of the mill jackoff world rant here...
I was hoping for a "my AA got cracked evertime since 1947" story...!!!!
Your just an old f u c k who's too self absorbed in your own semi-ok-ness....

I know a kid who cant talk!!!! Im mad, Im leaving

Wow, He mad.