I will search through my hand histories tomorrow, to verify this nonsense, but will be passing out after I write this up. I had a dramatic session tonight.

We start our story in the mean, clean, untracked American PLO streets. PLO25, to be precise.
I know, exciting, but please focus on the content of these beats and not on the depths of my bankroll.
Bonus: it was 9 handed.

Now that at least half of you have cringed at least once, I'll get to the action. UTG limps, and I click the pot button to 1.10 as UTG+1 with the KcKh6s8c. I get 4 callers, and see a flop of 8d6d8s. It checks to me, and I decide to click the pot button again (4.60), which may not or may not be GTO in PLO in the micros, but I do get the 1 caller I was hoping for from the BB.

Turn: 9d. He checks, I decide to balance my button clicking range with a nice click of the 2/3 Pot option. He shoves for what is essentially a click-back. Since I did not come to the mean, clean, untracked American 25PLO streets to fold full houses (and also getting 4:1 on a call) I call off all my quarters to see

5h5dQd7d

Actual WTF. Given the nature of micro stakes PLO, I presume he pays me 20+ quarters on any 9 or 4, and probably diamonds--though he may just bet/fold those permutations. But he finds one of two cards in the deck that gives him the goods, and someone dumb to ship the quarters

I sit out, stand up, and pop over to cheeki, breeki NL25 Zone instead of rebuying. Getting even is the goal now. I find myself in the following hand within minutes:

UTG opens to .75, exactly everyone else calls and I look down at QhQs in the BB.

I click the pot button, really going for that extra balance in my button clicking range since it's NL. UTG flats, as does SB.
Flop is 7dTd3x. SB checks. I decide on the 1/2 pot button, since I haven't used that one in awhile. Gotta balance that click range. The OG PFR aka UTG aka the Villian responds by jamming his stack of 100+ quarters in my face, and I snap call once the SB gets out tha way.

Villain shows KdKx. As I stare at the screen in utter awe of the pwnage, it gets worse.

Turn: 9d

Wow, I think. He got me. I was so sure I was ahead on the T high flop. I've put in so many cheeseburgers worth of quarters here and the turn takes away half my outs.

And then:

River: Qc

It was like nutting in first minute with a hot chick. I felt embarrassed, but doesn't matter had sex. Only I didn't sex. Just quarters.

Beat: flop the goods, suspect draw hits gin card for all my quarters
Brag: found myself outplayed and hit a 1 outer for all the quarters
Variance: quarters

What a load of nonsense

Please don't. Also stopped reading here

Far too many words

I don't think I even know that many words

did anyone read that?

I will not engage without TS's

For every great TS I will read one paragraph.

Fold pre both hands, your life will be better.

ship the quarters

OP, where do you play DG?

didn read get hand convertor

Trump must be proud of this wall of text.

Colorado.

I will use the hand history converter next time based on these responses. Seems that most clearly didn't read my tale of nonsense.

Hopefully some got a chuckle, as I was going for humor in the write up.

turtle

cliffs?

I laughed.