Originally Posted by Morphismus
It is hard to eulogize any poster – to capture in words not just the posts and the dates that make a posting record, but the essential truth of a person – their private joys and sorrows; the quiet moments and unique qualities that illuminate someone’s soul. How much harder to do so for a giant of gender bending, who moved an internet forum towards total sexual confusion, and in the process tilted billions of rednecks around the world.
Born during season 2 of Golden Girls, far from finding his sexual identity, a gender-fluid being raised as a boy by the elders of his gender-fluidity-ignorant tribe – Oberbrunner would emerge as the first great gender bender of the 21th century. Like Gandhi, she would lead a resistance movement – a movement that at its start held little prospect of success. Like King, he would give potent voice to the claims of the oppressed, and the moral necessity of making sure that every aspect of life is represented by equal amounts of cis-males, trans-females, cis-females, and trans-men (in any order). She would endure brutal privacy-violation that began in the Lady’s bathroom of the DMV, and reached the outside of said bathroom. Thrown out of the Lady’s bathroom, without force of arms, he would – like Lincoln – have awkward conversations about it with 3 people involved.
Given the sweep of her posting record, and the penis pix that he so rightly earned, it is tempting then to remember Oberbrunner as an icon, male one day, female the other, detached from the tawdry affairs of cis males. But Oberbrunner herself strongly resisted such a lifeless portrait. Instead, he insisted on sharing with us her opinions and beliefs; his miscalculations along with her victories. “At one point I closed my real Tinder account so that I could swipe right on one again, thinking that if I swiped right again, I would be more likely to show up for one” he wrote, “Now, I wonder if that confused Tinder and it's keeping me from showing up at all on one's Tinder?”
Oberbrunner showed us the power of gender bending; of taking risks on behalf of our ideals. Perhaps Oberbrunner was right that she inherited the balls from Caitlyn Jenner. But unlike closeted homosexuals – like LuckyLuke01 and King Spew – Oberbrunner disciplined his anger; and channeled her desire to bombing other threads with LGBTIQ issues into making threads, and more threads, and strategies for action, so cis-men, trans-women, trans-men, and cis-women (in any order) could stand-up for their dignity. Moreover, she accepted the consequences of his actions, knowing that standing up to powerful interests and injustice carries a price. “[a] person was upset that I was not in the bathroom of my gender assigned at birth” she wrote in the “Violated!”-Thread. “I was upset with the person for invading my privacy”
Oberbrunner taught us the meaning of “cis” in the first place, but also the importance of “trans”; the need to trade genitalia pix not only with those you agree with, but also with those who you don’t. He understood that sexual orientation cannot be contained by your body, or extinguished by bathroom assignments.
After this great gender bender is laid to rest; when we have returned to our cities and villages, and rejoined our daily routines, let us search then for her strength – for his largeness of spirit – somewhere inside ourselves. And when the night grows dark, when injustice weighs heavy on our hearts, or our best laid plans seem beyond our reach – think of Oberbrunner, and the words that brought him comfort within her body:
Sometimes I feel like I’m a “mate”
Sometimes I’m female, real and whole
I am the mistress of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
What a great soul he was. We will miss her deeply. May Mason Malmuth bless the memory of Oberbrunner. May Caitlyn Jenner bless the people of BBV4L.