Originally Posted by DatWillDoPig

I desperately wanted to play in a €2000 buy in event in galway recently. I only had half the buy in on the day so decided to play a €200 sit and go however to my major dissapointment it was cancelled. I then proceeded to the nearest bookies stuck €150 on a completely random horse. It rolled home and i collected €1200 and took my seat at a very tough table including Jp Kelly, Marty Smyth, Scott Gray and Busto soon. Pity i was busto myself by the end of day2

Originally Posted by Degens_LOL

Long time lurker, but I just had to register. I don't have a personal degen story to share since I'm the definition of a nit, but one of my aunt is a total degen.

She became a full blown degen after my uncle croaked. He was a lawyer at an important law fim in Montreal and pulled a lot of dough and they married pretty late : she was the definition of a trophy wife who was clearly digging for gold. Fake boobs, tight body, marries a guy thirty years older than her.

Before she inherited of all the monies (no kids ldo), her gambling spirits were pretty tame : she went to the casino about three days a year on average and had a strict allowance. Her thing was lottery tickets. She could buy 100$ worth of them a month. But since husband was loaded without kids, it didn't even make a blimp on the financial radar. So even though she gambled, she was still very low on the degen scale (if she was even on it). Plenty of micro regs tilt that much money in a session online.

But everything changed the second she became free after my uncle's death. My cousin's husband, who worked at the Montreal casino, saw her play 50$ a hand blackjack the evening after the funeral. When he told me that, I thought he was kidding but he was dead serious. She had changed practically overnight.

Notable highlights from that first year include:
- Selling the house.
- Buying more than 2k of lottery tickets in a week (we found a receipt from the convenience store she had left at my grandma's place).
- Gaining 70 pounds in six months while developping a cocaine habit at the same time (how this is feasible, I do not know).

One night in particular from that first year sticks with me. A friend of mine, who is a total degen in his own right, recognizes my aunt at a blackjack table and decides to have a chat with her. She proceeds to drunkenly piss away her money, standing on 14 a few times with the dealer showing 9 and so on. I'm probably not competent enoguh at bj to know a good strategy from a bad one, but I was told she played like a mouthbreathing retard on crack.

So after losing all her chips in a matter of minutes, she proclaims loudly that she is down approximately 5k on the night and all her credit cards are maxed so she cannot get anymore money, wich means no more blackjack. Yet, she still stays around and asks my buddy if he'll for a quick smoke with her. Since he is losing too, he agrees and they go outside.

Now, this is pretty standard degen fare: 5k in, 3 hours later, busto with all the cards maxed out and 10 bloody marys in you. But what happened next is what really pushed the limit of degeneracy. Two minutes after they are outside, she candidly asks my buddy is he'll let her suck his stuff for fifty dollars. He declines and she just nods and utters "your loss". Seeing as she was firmly in her Jabba the Hutt phase by this point, I really don't get what he would have lost.

As time went by, she started to get even more cracy/addicted. She would call my mom at any hours of the day to beg for money to pay for drugs/gambling debts even though my mom had clearly said she wanted nothing to do with her anymore unless she attended GA meetings. She barred herself from the casino a few times but always found new ways to try to sneak back in again. Cousin's husband once saw her try to enter the casino while dressed like a man. He said it was a ridiculous spectacle: she had those fake DD boobs just jutting out from her chest and an ass as large as a small sedan.

Five years after my unle had died, she was stone cold busto. This is when she started to attend GA meetings and met a few people who she ended up buying a house with what little she had left. Problem was they were decidedly retarded (as in clinically retarded) and even more life-busto than her. One of them, a man in his early thirties, started to refer to her as "mom" all the time. All of them were still solidly hooked to gambling and made frequent trips to bingo halls. She ended up playing everyday and driving more than 500 miles a week to attend the different bingo nights scattered around. She even called me one night out of the blue (it must've been 3 years since I had talked to her by that point) to ask me for tips since she had knew i was the "gambling type" too. During the call, she constantly reminded me who she was, as in "you remember me, aunt Nicole, the one with the huge boobs ?" and couldn't maintain a coherent line of thought. When I finally had enough and told her I was hanging up, she asked me to notify Jay, my friend, that her bj offer was still standing. She was probably only half joking.

It was at that time that the "son", while she was gone for a walk on Christmas morning of 2007, stole her car, took everything of value from their communal house and skipped town, never to be seen again.

I really don't know her whereabouts anymore due to my cousin not working at the casino and trying to keep a watchful eye on her, plus her cutting all ties with the family, but everything points out to her still degening it up full-time. I really ask myself from time to time what really prompted her sudden addiction. Most people start up pretty slow and increase the degen factor gradually to chase out losses, but not her: she put the pedal to the metal the instant she became single. Did she have a nervous breakdown due to her husband's death (unlikely since he was a headcase in his own right) ? Or was she bidding her time while he was alive, only awaiting his death to finally "live the life" ?

Originally Posted by rootnstein

He started telling everyone in the office to call him "Ice" .

Originally Posted by Degens_LOL

Cousin's husband once saw her try to enter the casino while dressed like a man. He said it was a ridiculous spectacle

Originally Posted by Droly

one time i was getting my dick sucked playing poker and then i get QQ im about to bust right and shes like "NUT ON MY FACEEE" then i look at the flop while im bustting and it's QQA and this dude betting into me on 10/25nl for like 250

so im nutting while flopping the nuts

best ****ing feeling in the world

Originally Posted by Monkey_Tilt

*claps* good read. Should of gotten it up obv. Good luck on the way back up. Also, as many said earlier, a true degen would have lost it all. We have to get it back TONIGHT.

Originally Posted by punchafish

oh and the rest on booze, drugs and rock n roll (true story)

Edit:

booze - underage drinking / solid fake ID
drugs - weed mainly
rock n roll - guitar(s) = £1.3k

Originally Posted by i hate donks

Most sorry episode of my life, was bout 7 hours deep in a $1 tourney (yes one ****ing dollars), and buzzing as i hadnt been playing long and never gone deep.
Then gf and her mum come round (just moved into new flat), with a nice free fridge and sofa for me, driving an hour to get there to surprise me. What do i do, kick up a fuss etc saying u cant come in atm, im going deep, this is it im going pro (the look on their faces when i told them it was a $1 buy in was particuarly priceless in a v v sad way).
GF stood firm in front of her mum, saying im being a wanker if i dont turn the laptop off were basically over, shes getting sick of all this poker talk. What do i do ?? hear a beep and go running to the laptop. FML

Originally Posted by Folding Soup

So you didn't win the tourney then?

Originally Posted by i hate donks

Most sorry episode of my life, was bout 7 hours deep in a $1 tourney (yes one ****ing dollars), and buzzing as i hadnt been playing long and never gone deep.
Then gf and her mum come round (just moved into new flat), with a nice free fridge and sofa for me, driving an hour to get there to surprise me. What do i do, kick up a fuss etc saying u cant come in atm, im going deep, this is it im going pro (the look on their faces when i told them it was a $1 buy in was particuarly priceless in a v v sad way).
GF stood firm in front of her mum, saying im being a wanker if i dont turn the laptop off were basically over, shes getting sick of all this poker talk. What do i do ?? hear a beep and go running to the laptop. FML

Originally Posted by M.A.H.P.'s

wrong. your entire life's baseline IS tilt.