Someone talked about Jennifer Love hewitt itt...

You're not even doing it right lol, 4L is a few forums down

[ ] limping monsters in PLO

I bet le' Cyril would have the best degen story of all time

the part about the wood pallets is awes. i smashed three of those plastic lawn chairs in my back yard over a year a few years ago. temper is more under control these days, but it was funny to find plastic pieces of chair all over the back yard when i finally got around to mowing.

Hey BBV


EDIT: just realized this is damn long post, sorry about that. wanted to get it off my chest

I'm kinda new here, I'm a normal nit who plays rather low stakes and grinds some money quietly.

So I'm 24 years old and I've been playing poker semi-professionally for ~2 years now. I dont have a tendency to blow my roll in one sitting, and that is what makes this night so strange in my mind. I dont act like this, never before.. Hopefully never will anymore. Anyway Poker has been the only income for me for the last 2 years.

So I am drinking with my buddies and I had a very good month in poker. I have a habit of withdrawing some money in the beginning of every month depending on how much I have won.. So I have $10,400 on my poker accounts (on 3 different rooms), and I havent withdrawn anything yet. I decide to play some and also bet on some sports just to have the sweat. I bet some random soccer in some random league, I dont even remember which anymore and I dont bother to check. So I bet 50 and after 5 mins my bet is screwed since the wrong team scored. Ok, no problem, they have live betting (betfair) and I can take my money back easily. I bet 100€ now and at about 80 minutes my second bet is screwed as well. So I just decide to take my money back and bet 300€ that no goals are scored anymore.. What do you know, at 90 minutes the home team scores and im down 450€, and a bit tilted as well.

We decide to hit the local casino before going to a bar. I take 300 euros with me and sit at a poker table.. I'm feeling anxious and I realize there is no way I can sit at a live poker table and play well. some alcohol in me and slight tilt from betting makes sure I will just try to find a place to shove my chips in and see what happens. I play about 20 mins and leave, with profit of 40€ or whatever. I hit the slots (I almost never play slots) and in 10 mins I'm down like 150€. I still have about 200 left and decide to take it to the blackjack table. I start bettinig 10e and win some, I'm at 350 or so.. then I lose like 7 in a row and tilt, I bet everything I have in 4 different spots. The dealer had J and I have 19,15,16,10. I take one on the 10 and get a 9 so now it's 19 (I dont double since I dont have money left) and dealer hits 20 obviously. total down somewhere around 750€ for the night.

I'm feeling kinda down and my friend is kind enough to buy me 2 drinks to cheer me up and give me words of consolation. I do feel kinda better, It's only money right.. So we go to a bar and drink some more, I'm getting drunk and I am not that interested to try to hit a girl tonight, kinda down and I dont feel like going through the trouble. Just want to get wasted. At some point of the night a decently pretty girl comes to me and starts chatting to me. She says she saw I am down and asks whats wrong. I'm like no problem, I just lost some money today and feel kinda crappy. We get into talking and I end up with my friends and her friends to some afterparty. There is like 15 people total, and I know the girl I was chatting up with and my friends. There is soem dude (I think the owner of the place) playing small stakes poker on his laptop, totally wasted. My friend is like yeah we play poker as well, this dude here is quite a highroller. He is like want to play? I can let you play if you want. So of course I sit in there and open up an account I have about $5000 in and start play NL600 No-limit heads-up.. My normal game is NL100 six max or PLo100 six max. I lose like 4 buy-ins in probabyl less than 15 mins, I cannot tell for sure how long it took. The girl I was chatting up with is somewhere with her friends and I figure I'll find her later, no time now since Im down a lot and super tilted. I jump into NL1k Heads-up and lose it all.. The only hand I can remember is the last hand when I shove it all-in with nut flushdraw on flop against villains 2 pair. I dont hit and I go busto on my account.

I am super tilted but the girl who I was chatting up with comes in there like 5 mins after I lost it all. I've been sitting there with my hand in my head just trying to realize what I just did. She gives me a glass of wine and asks if I want to go somewhere and talk. I'm like whatever yeah lets go. She starts kissing me and I know where this is leading to, but I couldnt care less.. I'm super drunk, and super tilted for losing craploads of money. So the biggest failure of the night is that I cannot get it up, and I storm out of the house embarassed. I call my friends I tell them I'm going home you guys have fun. I go home and open the other account with ~$2000 in there. I play Nl400 PLO and fittingly, lose it all. The next day I wake up the feeling is surreal.. I cannot believe what I have just done, I blew almost $10,000 in one night, which is like 50% of my net worth. And it all started from 50€ bet on soccer for fun. I realize that I have to take a break from poker and get my head together. I do exactly that and take a week off. Now I'm back in the grind with one really sick, stupid, and embarrasing night to remember. I hope I learned something, I dont want to feel the way I did when I woke up ever again. Just awful :S

Beat: Lost 50% of my networth in one night.
Brag: Didnt even try to get a girl, but still got one.
Huge Beat: Cant get it up :S
Brag: still able to play NL100 (yeah, I am a nit)

*claps* good read. Should of gotten it up obv. Good luck on the way back up. Also, as many said earlier, a true degen would have lost it all. We have to get it back TONIGHT.

ponder: another good one, and it hits home more than the others coz youre like me i think (even down to the three sites).

i made a $550 misklik tonite...

I desperately wanted to play in a €2000 buy in event in galway recently. I only had half the buy in on the day so decided to play a €200 sit and go however to my major dissapointment it was cancelled. I then proceeded to the nearest bookies stuck €150 on a completely random horse. It rolled home and i collected €1200 and took my seat at a very tough table including Jp Kelly, Marty Smyth, Scott Gray and Busto soon. Pity i was busto myself by the end of day2

built onlin bank roll to 4100 manchester utd 1-0 up penalty given snap shove my roll on exchanges gettin 1.45 to 1 ftw (they won 6in6 before this and were versus west ham 13/20 in the league) ....ronaldo (worlds most expensive soccer play) misses pen 5 mins to go obv equaliser oh dear one month later livin it home grindin 10NL.....merry xmas

Man you truly are a sicko.

interesting.

kinda want pics of this person posted itt

Haha best quotes in whole thread

Most sorry episode of my life, was bout 7 hours deep in a $1 tourney (yes one ****ing dollars), and buzzing as i hadnt been playing long and never gone deep.
Then gf and her mum come round (just moved into new flat), with a nice free fridge and sofa for me, driving an hour to get there to surprise me. What do i do, kick up a fuss etc saying u cant come in atm, im going deep, this is it im going pro (the look on their faces when i told them it was a $1 buy in was particuarly priceless in a v v sad way).
GF stood firm in front of her mum, saying im being a wanker if i dont turn the laptop off were basically over, shes getting sick of all this poker talk. What do i do ?? hear a beep and go running to the laptop. FML

say hello to my new hero

yeah,agree,nice read, good thing u recovered

dude,wat **** state are u in, the jews in nyc are **** nits, none of the jew girls get down, and haven't seen a jew that drinks and does drugz, although, I lve played poker with some

So you didn't win the tourney then?

7 hours deep it should be over by then

I built my roll to $100k then lost it all. I had $35k available to me in credit from the bank. $15k credit card limit, $15k line of credit and $5k overdraft. I took this money and continued to play high steaks. I entered a $1.6k buy in live tournament that allows re-entries in the first hour. I gambled like crazy to try and get chips, near the end i was just open shoving blind. On the last hand before re-entries were over open shoved 73os, guy calls with AA. Flop comes 733 and i double. I was in for 5 buy ins. I ended up min cashing for $3k. Couple weeks later i enter a $2k re-entry. I was in for 4-buy ins this time and didnt cash. Once again i open jammed into AA and cracked it with two unsuited unders. I steaked my friend who was in for 2 buyins, he also lost. At this point i have lost all that credit as well through continuing to play very high and steaking and loaning friends money to play. I am owed $45k from friends but I have no access to cash at all. Now I am steaked for mtts and i am 7k in makeup. Poker has made almost every aspect of my life worse. Im in debt, my relationships with family has gone bad as they dont accept poker, I have dropped out of university twice so I am way behind but now in 3rd year. I became clinically depressed from the losses and am now on anti-depressents. I am overweight from eating junk food and playing online poker. I have severe bad posture from slouching too much with causes back and neck pain. I have experienced urinary problems from holding it during sngs when I didn't have wireless internet. I urinate fine now. Yes i know, I should have used a pee bottle.
I still do not believe in br management and I will continue to risk my entire roll if I ever get money again. I am known as one of the most fearless and tilt proof players. The huge losses did eventually get to me but I am at peace with them now. Several times I have lost $10k in a cash game and I just understand its part of the game and buy-in some more. I continue to play fearless despite my financial position. For instance in the uboc main event, 3 bet jammed with AJos on the exact bubble when several people had less chips than me. I lost the hand but people will less chips busted on the same hand so i min-cashed. The main friend who owes me money used to be an extremely spewy horrible player when i loaned him money. He now owes me $33k.
I was always a huge baller, and now for the first time in my life I am broke, but I am such a degenerate that I am enjoying being broke. It is motivating me to keep improving my game to get out of this hole.
I have risked my entire roll in high stakes live cash games several times.
My favourite game is mtts ofcourse because I am such a degenerate and love sweating for those huge payouts, and love flipping for five figures at the final table. I enjoy the sick variance.
I went to Macau for the most recent APPT Main Event. I bought in directly using debt for the main event, cash games, side events, and all expenses. I swapped 50% with a friend who made the final table. I have since lost my share.
I have a horse who won over $100k in tournaments last year. Most of the money came to me. I lost it all and can no longer steak him.
When poker punishes me I still love it, I love every aspect of it.
When i graduate from university next year my parents will give me $25k. I will move out with this money and pursue professional poker.
Every sunday i get steaked in about 16 mtts across 12 sites for about $3k in buy ins.

I should add that I am trying to pick up a big mtt score before this semester is over to fullfill my degen dreams of getting back into the huge live games, playing in the wsop main event for the first time and returning to macau so my friend can attempt to final table back to back.

GJ... they shoulda called before they came.

wrong. your entire life's baseline IS tilt.

I would just like to say that having a friend who can give you an endless line of credit with a stripper, with an open-ended pay date - merely by saying "I vouch for him" - is a dangerous/powerful/awesome/terrible thing.

Oh yeah, here's mine. Got drunk - blew $22.5k (most of my BR) to durrrr and H@llingol in 2 hands. Barely remember it: http://archives1.twoplustwo.com/show...0&fpart=1&vc=1

Losing it all was the only thing that finally tilted me, and only temporarily. Many people will vouch that I have never complained about a bad beat, infact encouraged donkies that they played it correctly. I have run horrible at mtts over a small sample and still love them. I have lost half my roll in a bad beat and many people will vouch that it did not stop me from playing my A game. Many people ask me how I can not care at all about taking bad beats for ridiculous sums of money.