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Old 04-03-2009, 08:57 PM   #101
deathorglory0
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Re: Degen Stories....

Its not my story btw, but someone I know very well.
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:00 PM   #102
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Re: Degen Stories....

I played some holdem once with 60 only a buyin bankroll. True story.
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:03 PM   #103
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by deathorglory0 View Post
Its not my story btw, but someone I know very well.
is he scottish? from near stirling?
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:15 PM   #104
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by King Niche View Post
one time i was sitting in my house on my own i had just split up with my gf who was a crack head but she was nice.. the room was dark i was surrounded by bottles of piss half eaten sandwiches i even had a crust behind my ear i was quite sad because i was busto and heartbroken i thought maybe we would make it work and she would be my main squeese anyway she left me for a crack dealer..so at this point im feelin like ten dewey heart aching empty busto feeling and linger tilt from stacking off with a flush draw because some crotch monkey over bets the pot and i run into the swinging blade and throw up 2 clanging bricks and I just punch my ****in monitor almost put my fist through it and then i kicked my coffee table but not like a regular person no no no..i have to hit it as hard as I can with my ****ing shin!!!! wtff was i thinking im not van damme or some **** that hurt so bad i collapsed in agony and started crying i just laid there whimpering in agony sobbing and eventually the pain eased off but i had blood running all the way down my leg..i just laid there on the carpet for 2 hours staring into space i even knocked one out while laying in the recovery position i felt so lazy like a lazy slob and i smelt so rank like chinese food in a dumpster for days..i eventually get up im wearing stripey boxers and half of them is up my ass ive got my ass cheek showing but i dont care i sit at my pc and watch some 200/400 on betfair wishing i was in the game..i kept sitting at a table hoping i would have cash in my account i actually prayed to mary magdagascar..i check my emails and boooom titan poker have put free money in my damn account!!!!!!!!!!!!!! woooooooooooooo..it felt like a blessing. Its like 5 dollars..so I go straight to max but in 5c/10c or some BS where u get nit on nits and I run that **** up to 20 in no time, then I but in at 25/50 and I hit a big overset and and I make some decent bluffs I get my stack to 145..at this point im thinking ok just play this mother****ing cool dont be a degen waste of lung capacity but i say *** it i will take a shot at 2/4...

so I pick the easiest table luckily for me they are all easy and first hand I shove with the doyle brunson just for good luck everyone folds secnd hand i get AA..I shove I get 2 callers an Iwin and im oer 400 i say**** this and i goto 5/10 witha short stack what else am i suppose to do..i run this upto 3k pretty easily and step up to 10/20 and in 3 hours I have 13k..then it happened..I GET KING ****ING KING and some guy called han solo (TILTED) raises me to 30 dollars I re raise to 180 He raises to 550 I call planning to shove any flop flop comes AAA ..he says to me in chat I HAVE IT and bets the pot im like wtf ..thats areverse reversal bluff damn *** he must have it **** i cant fold i felt my heart speed up kind of like a panic attack how can i fold this my dad is in my ear saying DONT CALL he has the 4 of a kind im like no dad let me play my own damn hands why cant you go and play poker with otis redding always ****** interfering ..and i start arguing with him cant believe i have gone from 5 dollars to over a 20k pot in just hours..I call and he flips over QQ..I FIST PUMP LIKE IM OHN MACKENROE SHOUTING NOW WHAT NOW WHAT DAD HE DIDNT SAY **** TURN QUEEN RIVER QUEEENNNNNNNNNNN>>OMFGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG GGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG I MWAS SO ****IN MAD I STARTED SPITTINGup BLOOD FOAMING UP ...PUNCHED MY SELF in teh side of the head AND STARTED SHOUTING AT MY DAD INSIDE MY HEAD IM LIKE **** OFF LEAVE ME ALONE GET OUT OF My HEAD.. OMGG IM BUSTO AGAIN I FEEL LIKE A WORM WHO HAS HAS BIN SHOVELLED WHEN THE GROUND IS COLD OR MABE STUCK HIS HEAD IN A TURD..I FELT LIKE SUCH A ****INg DEGEN I COULD HAVE PLAYED 5/10 with 13k so easily and made decent rake and maybe found me some new pussy easily when i tell em im back to being a pro...first i burnt my hand on the stove on purpose omggg i was so wasted i went out in the backyard stark naked i started climbing the trees and just trying to get back to nature and forget the damn poker..loking back id lost my damn mind that pot had eloctrocuted my noodle..it started to rain and i looked so pathetic i couldnt even get a crack whore to stay with me and I had a big hemmaroid and my white pastey body stood out under the grey sky i must have looked like a sagging bag of milk...

..all i wanted to do was grind for 18 hours a day and fester in my own filth and live the life of a poker pro grind on the mind till i die make my tomb a house of cards.. i wanted to give up so bad.. now i was busto and i couldnt see a break in the clouds or any hope the next day when i woke up i had to masturbate just so i could get out of bed i browsed 2+2 and went back to bed for 3 days..I didnt even get up to go peepee i just pissed the bed because i was busto and nothing else mattered..i kept reminded myself that atleast i nwasnt the fat sloth puppet in that movie seven where he gets locked in a bat cave and is made to eat spaghetti till his guts spill open..but this didnt make me feel any better..
whats urine and the smell of a cheesy ritz cracker ass crack when you lost a 26k pot? i didnt give a **** about pissing on myself by that point..i could of had a milllion dingelberries attatched to my ass i wouldnt have cared...i was so upset the lowest point for so long even lower than when i talked myself out of a guy giving me a BJ for $100 I just couldnt do it..i felt lower than when my mom force fed me flowers..I almost killed myself on day 2 when metallica came on the radio..i dont know how I ever made it out alive..i always swear to this day it was just the hope of being back in action someday..it lifted me out of the bottomless pit and gave me reason to live and breathe..never quit guys..not even when they are dragging your face through the ****..there is always someone worse off than you..like a guy with a glass eye with a fish in it....keep grind on the mind

lmfao funniest story ive ever read.

is this 100% true or just made up?
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:28 PM   #105
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Re: Degen Stories....

i play internet poker for a living
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:39 PM   #106
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Re: Degen Stories....

Every year in July/August I go on major tilt.

3 years ago (March not August): On paradise poker won $3k online in cash and HUs SNG. Went crazy with HU SNG winning like 20 $100 and $200 1v1s in a row. I go to play BJ start doing $300 a spin doubling on anything even like 14 and win $15k. I wanted to cash $, but paradise was like only $5k every 24 hours. So I blew $10k the next morning in BJ in 1 hour and I have never played BJ since! I WAS 17!

2 1/2 years ago: Won $28k in 28 days on fixed limit 30/60 on stars and $100-$1k hu. I didn't have much $ then probs about $60-70k total. I couldn't withdraw like $15k from my account due to 48 hours deposit/withdraw rules.

I stayed in on a Saturday night when I shoulda gone out with my bro to party. I play 5 $1k hu and lose them all. Then I go fixed limit 100/200 and blow another $6k. Then I decide to go 25/50 NL with $5k grind it up to $10k. Then I get KK... push all in pre vs AA for a $20k pot. Then i open up a bodog account and lose 2 $1k 1v1s in a second. Then my brother came home and I explained everything to him and just couldn't stop crying it was like $18k in 2 hours and I was underage gambler! I quit until January!

1 1/2 years ago: Had a great May (+$35k) and decent June. Meant to go to Thailand with friends. We plan to go Hong Kong for 2 days then go to Thailand for a month. In Hong Kong first night we get wasted and I go to bed. I wake up to find out 2 of my mates have got arrested for murder! They held for like 48 hours and then they are cleared of the charges and we rush home. We go to Bulgaria for a week on holiday and then I have all July to gamble.
I have an account on 32red and I start playing 50/100 day I come back. I blow about $12k in an hour... the manager phones me and is like "Rob are you cool, these are big swings for you". I go on to blow like another $20k in that day and the next day at 50/100 and quit till January!!!

Last Summer: Just had an insane July winning £37k. In August I start short stacking a bit of 100/200 NL to try and make some serious $ as I was up pretty good amount for the year. Playing on ipoker find a player called helderarbeit. Lose about $25k to him one night... got tilted by him rivering a str8 vs me when we were all in me A10 and him A9 for about $12k.

Grinded for 2 weeks and made the $25k back at lower stakes. Then I went away to Italy with my family and took my laptop with me. Played 100/200 again vs him and dropped about $20k to him. It was tough bcuz although its obvious now I was convinced i was better than him. I downed a bottle of this like lemon alcohol with was 30% and went to sleep without spkin to family. Next day Dropped about $40k to him... got tilted by KK losing to A9 for $20k pot all in pre and he hit two 9s. Drank another bottle of rancid lemon alcohol and didn't speak to family.

Then I decided to go in sun and enjoy holiday... I then deposited $1k stars that night and played stars mils and came like 70th. Then I blew whole contents of account at 25/50.

Got back to London a couple of days later and blew another $10k online at 100/200 vs Randomdonk. I quit until end of November...

Here are all my Degen Stories.

Rob
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:44 PM   #107
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
So...as of today......

I am 33yrs old, I have exactly $200 cash to my name, I owe a payday loan place $500.00, zero online money, I live with my parents, I have ZERO friends, I put on 100lbs in 2 years and am up to 300lbs, I eat like crazy, I'm starting to get chest pains daily so I think I have another major problem.

Over the last few weeks, I will sometimes take a 10min break from work and go to the bathroom to cry about my life and my situation.

But I get paid next week so I can make another deposit online...ship it!
Hahahahaha

I literally just burst out laughing reading this while drinking water and spit a MOUTHFUL of water onto my carpet in uncontrollable laughter.

Your situation is not special imo. Everybody hits rock bottom at some point. You gotta dig yourself out slowly.

Funny to think how many guys like you I've won $$$ from and it messed up their lives.
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:49 PM   #108
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by boythinks View Post
one time i got bad beated really bad and lost $400 playing 100nl on FTP...

i started tilting ..... then.. in a complete rage i bought several decks of playing cards and a hat from the FTP store

the FTP cards are really bad quality ... and i never wore the hat

hows that for degen story??


lol thats what i do when i tilt.
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Old 04-03-2009, 09:54 PM   #109
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Re: Degen Stories....

To Robert12345....

Quote:
$3k online in cash and HUs SNG. I go to play BJ start doing $300 a spin doubling on anything even like 14 and win $15k.
Quote:
Had a great May (+$35k)
Quote:
Just had an insane July winning £37k.
U sometimes go on insane heaters...and then lose the $$$ on BJ and coolers..... what's degen about that? U win the rest of the time? Charmed life imo. We got guys on here sleeping in trash cans and selling their babies in xchange for Full Tilt dollars.

Have you ever sucked dick for poker chips?
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Old 04-03-2009, 10:28 PM   #110
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Coff View Post
you are prob one of those guys who wears the shirts on the boardwalk that say....

FBI
Federal. Booty. Inspector.

Or some corny crap like that when in actuality if a girl brushed up on your leg you would bust instantly. You sir really suck.
wow...I am actually wearing a FBI (Female Body Inspector) shirt right now as I read this I swear it was a gag gift from my roommate last Christmas and I've never worn it out of the house, but still!
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Old 04-03-2009, 10:33 PM   #111
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Re: Degen Stories....

dropped ~60k doing six-way PLO flips for 2k a pop and 5k on the side against zangbezan in jan. turning stone internet is so rigged.
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Old 04-04-2009, 06:00 AM   #112
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Re: Degen Stories....

started playing poker on partypoker...blew my first 2 $100 deposits quick...found fulltilt poker...liked the software a little better and on my first day there i did allright...next day went busto...redeposit...busto..redepositx2 ...busto busto...then i find out netteller did not immediatly take funds from my bank account, there is a few days grace period...get the bright idea to deposit way more then is in my bank, with the idea in head that i could just win and withdraw before it caught up with me..wrong....busto again....bunch of insufficeint fund fees, they shut down my bank account. then all that **** went down with U.S pokersites...netteller just flatout stops hassleing me...but now i have the itch, but no bank account or credit cards to get money online....then i find out my downfall freerolls...even though in my head i know im never gonna make any real cash playing them, i become a freeroll degen...I am joining every site that advertises freerolls...joining poker forums that specilize in freerolls...at any given night i could be found playing freerolls on at least 5 different sites...anything i win from these freerolls i would sit down at a cash table with it all and either blow it or make a lil then blow it all later...there were some days when i would play up to 50 freerolls..tons of sites for them back then (tropical poker, pittbull, wingows, jungle, bunch of casino sites that had poker rooms, and all the major sites to)
dident know crap about poker then thought it was just like bingo...im suprised that i got the few wins that i did...but i was serious about it...days that i was at work all id think about was what freerolls i would play that night...my social life suffered then died...then i started reading info about the game...doing all the homework i could...then 3 months ago(still busto online, still no bank or credit cards) i traded a coworker a eigth of some dan k for 50 pokerstars...used bankroll management on that $50 and now im sitting with about $500(nothing big, but at least it has been increasing steadily)...now gots to fix my social life
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Old 04-04-2009, 06:08 AM   #113
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Re: Degen Stories....

.... I couldnt cash the high tier of the event I specialize in for the scoop.
- insert standard bad beat story-

WTF am I doing with my life?

I'm going to start a weird record label or something. cut down on variance?
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Old 04-04-2009, 06:25 AM   #114
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Re: Degen Stories....

This is the ultimate degen story : http://88percent.blogspot.com/

cliff notes: Welsh guy runs up his roll to hundres of thousands, thinks he is a pro, loses it all, sells house, loses that, blogs about the whole thing!
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Old 04-04-2009, 08:16 AM   #115
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Re: Degen Stories....

who is that??? Sounds like me.
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Old 04-04-2009, 08:32 AM   #116
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by Darace View Post
Here's mine. Sorry in advance for my poor english.

2 years ago, back in the sweet time of Everest Poker, I had about $35k online. But the thing is I have some massive tilt issues. I was playing NL400, but could lost as low as 2 buyin, tilt my ass off, and go in NL5000. It went well sometimes (hit n' run FTW), but not always obv. So I cashed out a lot, lost a lot (about $15k), leaving myself with $3k or so online.

But before this, I bought some tickets for live tournies (500/300/200€). I managed to win the €500 for about €20k. I was back in business.

Glad and happy to be back i was thinking 'ok no more tilts, just grind overrolled and stfu'. I put some post-it and posters all over my room saying 'Tilt = broke = no more whores and parties' and stuff like that.
I gave the bills to a friend who transfered me on FTP. So I had about $30k online. He transfered me the money on the sunday after my win, and I started playing NL200 (yea because I play overrolled to avoid tilt now) around 8pm.

Exactly 40min later, after losing 3 buyins, I was in NL2000.
1 buyin lost later, I was on HU NL10k w/ Dustin Dirksen. After he kicked my ass for $8k, I was on HU NL20k w/ OMGClayAiken.

As I raised to $600 and sometimes 3bet to $1800, I gave a look to my poster and thought to myself 'Yea, I might have some tilt issues'.
this needs more
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Old 04-04-2009, 09:13 AM   #117
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Re: Degen Stories....

I never did 10k flips to top off a million and as a matter of fact never was apart of that chat.
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Old 04-04-2009, 09:26 AM   #118
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by lwrunner103 View Post
I never did 10k flips to top off a million and as a matter of fact never was apart of that chat.
Well, I never said its you or that you were a part of the chat..i just asked him if he was you as that conversation happened right after i had vaguely read a blog or a story about someone called ashman running bad at the nosebleeds. I didnt include his answer as he told me who he is, and I know that he doesn't want to be outed.

I removed that question from the dialogue i posted here since the guy is someone else and it doesnt have anything to do with you, but thought it was funny that you replied in this thread right after me and that you said it sounded like you, so I posted it. I dont mind removing it if you think its gonna confuse people and make it think its you.
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Old 04-04-2009, 12:26 PM   #119
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Re: Degen Stories....

After reading Dr. Pauly's latest blog post, I lost $600 playing drunken guess her muff last night. http://guesshermuff.blogspot.com/
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Old 04-04-2009, 03:22 PM   #120
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Re: Degen Stories....

I did some stalkerish research and I'm 100% sure it is vandAAgnog.
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Old 04-04-2009, 06:36 PM   #121
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Re: Degen Stories....

This thread is gold
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Old 04-04-2009, 06:40 PM   #122
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Re: Degen Stories....

I had a feeling it was vandaagnog. Dude was as sick as I was. Crazy times.
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Old 04-04-2009, 06:51 PM   #123
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by lwrunner103 View Post
I had a feeling it was vandaagnog. Dude was as sick as I was. Crazy times.
Looked up vandaagnog in the dictionary, found this:

de·gen·er·ate (d-jnr-t)
adj.
1. Having declined, as in function or nature, from a former or original state: a degenerate form of an ancient folk art.
2. Having fallen to an inferior or undesirable state, especially in mental or moral qualities.

n.
1. A depraved, corrupt, or vicious person.
2. A person lacking or having progressively lost normative biological or psychological characteristics.
intr.v. (--rt) de·gen·er·at·ed, de·gen·er·at·ing, de·gen·er·ates
1. To fall below a normal or desirable state, especially functionally or morally; deteriorate: old water pipes that are degenerating with age; a dispute that degenerated into a brawl.
2. To decline in quality: The quality of his writing degenerated as he continued to drink.
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Old 04-04-2009, 11:43 PM   #124
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Re: Degen Stories....

Quote:
Originally Posted by RelaxedPrecision View Post
Looked up vandaagnog in the dictionary, found this:

de·gen·er·ate (d-jnr-t)
adj.
1. Having declined, as in function or nature, from a former or original state: a degenerate form of an ancient folk art.
2. Having fallen to an inferior or undesirable state, especially in mental or moral qualities.

n.
1. A depraved, corrupt, or vicious person.
2. A person lacking or having progressively lost normative biological or psychological characteristics.
intr.v. (--rt) de·gen·er·at·ed, de·gen·er·at·ing, de·gen·er·ates
1. To fall below a normal or desirable state, especially functionally or morally; deteriorate: old water pipes that are degenerating with age; a dispute that degenerated into a brawl.
2. To decline in quality: The quality of his writing degenerated as he continued to drink.
Sick research.
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Old 04-05-2009, 08:54 AM   #125
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Re: Degen Stories....

My degen story is that I run around in forums telling people what to do, becuase I do it, and I obviously bank all the time. Then I check PT and think "wtf is this red stuff?" when I see im down 1k in April. One minute later, I´ve forgot all about it and im on it again. Or, I decide to go out shopping, because I run so damn good right now making tons of cash. Then I check PT again and think "wtf is this red stuff?", and repeat.

Not super funny, but definatly a bit degen. I´ve went so far with my mental work that it might even have caused a counter productive bubble of Joy.
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