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Degen Stories.... Degen Stories....

03-29-2011 , 03:19 PM
one time i called a guy a degen jokingly.. we both play poker so we are both degens.. common knowledge

anyways.. this ****** actually gets offended and makes a HUGE deal about it.. starts yelling and tries to defend himself ..actually EXPLAINING how hes not a degen etc


its one thing to be a degen but a moron idiot degen?? thats the worse
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03-30-2011 , 02:09 AM
being an idiot is way worse than being a degen. Being both is...
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03-30-2011 , 03:03 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by dukeftw
when i was 17 i asked my dad to put 10 dollars on full tilt for me. Then i proceeded to lose it and without his knowledge i re bought and lost it again. This went on until i was 2.5k down and my dad had no clue... That account was for pleasure thought it couldn't hurt and i would win it all back..

He then finds out and freaks says i have to play it all of off and would be not driving the c30 he bought me for my birthday. I then have my drug addict/degenerate uncle put 100 dollars onto poker for me again... I bring the 100 up to 2k playing 1 buy in of 1/2 nl. next day i bring that up to just under 8k playing 5/10 nl. I then cash out for 8k and when i get the check i give it right to my dad. He says "I DONT GIVE A **** ABOUT 2 GRAND I DONT WANT YOU PLAYING YOUR NOT TOUCHING THIS MONEY EVER AND ITS GOING STRAIGHT TO COLLEGE"... my dad lost all respect for me that day and has yet to treat me the same. at that point it was not about the money and all about the trust issue. Never involve friends and family in your poker!!!!

Just my story, take it for what it is... now i play with proper bank roll management w/ around 1k in my br and it is relaxing not playing with other peoples money
That is harsh bro. It seems like your father may have had some bad experiences with gambling and you losing 2.5k may have reminded him about it.
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03-30-2011 , 05:34 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by feedmykids
One of my friends put on the wizard of oz, and played the dark side of the moon sound track to it. Apparently they're supposed to go together and make sense. All it did was scare the hell out of me, and I didn't realize I could turn it off, so I started hitting the TV. My friend turned it off, and I luckily avoided doing any damage.

Lol, I've done some very similar things

Quote:
Originally Posted by feedmykids
Things were going along well, with some minor glitches. One of my friends was hungry (?!?!) and made popcorn. He ate a couple and the colonels got stuck in his throat, so he started making a sound to get them out like "EHHHHH" "EHHHH".
For some reason I giggled at this for ages

Quote:
Originally Posted by feedmykids
The next glitch came when I read too much into a stain glass window. I saw many things in it, including a face. I was convinced the face was looking at me. It got to the point where I picked up a shovel, and was going to break the stain glass window. Somehow my friends stopped me by telling me that it was ok and that it was my friend...

The last glitch was not so lucky. We were listening to the song "time" by floyd, and when the clock sounds started going off, my friend fell from grace and thought the antique clock in the room was turning time around, and he quickly broke it.
Efficient.
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03-30-2011 , 03:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by dukeftw
when i was 17 i asked my dad to put 10 dollars on full tilt for me. Then i proceeded to lose it and without his knowledge i re bought and lost it again. This went on until i was 2.5k down and my dad had no clue... That account was for pleasure thought it couldn't hurt and i would win it all back..

He then finds out and freaks says i have to play it all of off and would be not driving the c30 he bought me for my birthday. I then have my drug addict/degenerate uncle put 100 dollars onto poker for me again... I bring the 100 up to 2k playing 1 buy in of 1/2 nl. next day i bring that up to just under 8k playing 5/10 nl. I then cash out for 8k and when i get the check i give it right to my dad. He says "I DONT GIVE A **** ABOUT 2 GRAND I DONT WANT YOU PLAYING YOUR NOT TOUCHING THIS MONEY EVER AND ITS GOING STRAIGHT TO COLLEGE"... my dad lost all respect for me that day and has yet to treat me the same. at that point it was not about the money and all about the trust issue. Never involve friends and family in your poker!!!!

Just my story, take it for what it is... now i play with proper bank roll management w/ around 1k in my br and it is relaxing not playing with other peoples money

This story is pretty brutal..yet all i can think about with half a smile on my face his how much of an absolute wild cat your uncle is...i mean things must be pretty damn frosty between him and your dad if he was knowingly enabling his 17 y.o nephew to **** himself up even worse, i would love to know how that guys mind operates i mean even most severe degenerates would surely steer family members away from doing degenerate things....even more so an under-age family member lol, that **** really blows my mind.
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03-30-2011 , 04:57 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by feedmykids
One of my first drug experiences...

My friends and I planned an epic weekend. We had a 2 hour drive from the city to another friends house. On the drive up, I wanted to get drunk, but didn't want my friend to get arrested for having an open bottle in the car since he was driving. What to do?

An old trick. Pour out half a bottle of gatorade, and refill it with vodka. Delicious... ok maybe not. But it did the trick. We hoped the cops would not ask about the gatorade bottles in the trunk if worst came to worst.

On the drive up I was playing poker on my laptop on the way up. I was running super hot and playing every hand while getting wasted, and my friend who was driving somehow was following the action on every hand. The passengers were freaking out telling him to watch the road...he kept saying ok but then every time I binked some river he was the first to scream, haha.

I booked a 6k win and was completely ripped when we arrived, somehow safely. The plan was to do some e and go to a strip club which was described as epic (strip clubs in the city suck!). So, we all dropped 2 and went to the strip club. Unfortunately for me, an hour passed and I still wasn't rolling. I know now it's because I drank so much and ate before taking it, but I was still tilted. Naturally I took 2 more E.

At some point I was in the back about to get some dances. I was picking the songs (cool part of this club was that there was private juke boxes in the back rooms). All of the sudden, the e hit me. I have never experienced anything more amazing than rolling that hard and having a girl grinding on me. There's a reason strippers say they love clients who are rolling, they really don't have to do much at all and the guys just love it.

After 5 hours and a lot of money spent later for nothing at all, it was time to go. I didn't want to go, but then my friends explained to me we were going to some hotel room that the strippers were staying in because it was their friends birthday. Great!

So we get to the hotel room, and there are a bunch of girls who weren't even working that night, a few who were, and a couple of other guys.

Now, I was trying really hard NOT to touch the girls, but inwardly I was freaking out, wanting to touch everything. One of these girls noticed this, and gave me her scarf. I started rubbing the scarf against my skin, and saying how it was the most amazing thing ever. She then took off her top and told me to touch her nipples. I told her she was the nicest person ever, but really I loved the scarf way more (no, I'm not gay or something!).

Eventually I stopped peaking, and wanted to do some more e. Everyone told me that the play right then would be to do some coke. It would take away the coming down/semi rolling feeling, and give me another feeling. I had never done coke before, but it seemed like a good idea.

We ended up finishing an 8 ball really quick (there were a lot of us), and I tried to get that girl to come back to our place but obv that did not work (remember how much I had been freaking out before, I must have seemed crazy).

We went back to where we were staying, like 10 hours after our adventure had begun. For normal people that would be the end of an interesting night, but for us it was just the beginning. Now it was time to drop some acid.

Right after dropping, I announced that I had to jack off. I mean, I had just been around naked girls grinding on me etc, what else could I want to do? My friends laughed at me and wished me luck. I tried so hard for like an hour, but it was ****ing impossible. I was SURE I could do it. Finally I just gave up, and went downstairs...

And puked my brains out.

My friends didn't find this as amusing, and my only concern was would this affect me tripping from the acid. They assured me it wouldn't. We cleaned it up, and we began to trip.

One of my friends put on the wizard of oz, and played the dark side of the moon sound track to it. Apparently they're supposed to go together and make sense. All it did was scare the hell out of me, and I didn't realize I could turn it off, so I started hitting the TV. My friend turned it off, and I luckily avoided doing any damage.

Then, my other friends started stapling sheets to the wall to stop the light from coming in. I was too far gone to understand what was going on. Eventually we turned on some youtube videos. I could make an awesome youtube playlist for tripping, lol. There are some great videos. I remember a "wish you were here" one where I was convinced I was talking to a guy in a cold steel cage... and also elanore rigby was freaky as hell.

Things were going along well, with some minor glitches. One of my friends was hungry (?!?!) and made popcorn. He ate a couple and the colonels got stuck in his throat, so he started making a sound to get them out like "EHHHHH" "EHHHH"

Amazingly both me and my other friend ducked to the ground when this happened. I don't know what we were doing but we both thought we were getting shot at/bombed. Who the **** eats popcorn while tripping?

The next glitch came when I read too much into a stain glass window. I saw many things in it, including a face. I was convinced the face was looking at me. It got to the point where I picked up a shovel, and was going to break the stain glass window. Somehow my friends stopped me by telling me that it was ok and that it was my friend...

The last glitch was not so lucky. We were listening to the song "time" by floyd, and when the clock sounds started going off, my friend fell from grace and thought the antique clock in the room was turning time around, and he quickly broke it.

All in all it was a pretty great trip though. When we were coming back to reality, my breathing problems became more evident to me. Turns out I was having terrible athsma the whole time because we were in the woods and I have bad allergies. At one point I refused to listen to any song other than breathe (also by floyd), because it calmed me down (but I was sure I could only breathe with it on).

At this point my friends were not that amused. We had to drive back to the city and it was getting kind of late, so we decided to do some coke before leaving. That helped us get into "cleanup" mode, and my friend who lost his phone spent like 1 hour just looking all over for it while cracked out.

We drove home, and got a good nights sleep.

My friend ended up banging one of the strippers from that night the next week. Or was it from the night before? On that note, we still refer to this night jokingly as "the 2 night night."

And we ended up making money because of my rungood on the drive up. What could be better?

(BTW sorry for calling everyone "my friend" I obv don't want to name any names in these stories).
awesome. thats what ppl call a cocktail of drugs. always wanted to roll at a club but never made it happen
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03-30-2011 , 05:12 PM
When me and my friend just turned 18, we went up to Turningstone in upstate NY with 2k each. He drove and before I tell the rest let me preface it by saying that he used to do magic tricks for little kid's bdays on the side for some extra cash, so he always had some tricks laying around his car.

So we go up, win a little in poker, then hit the table games...


Needless to say, halfway through the trip home his tank is on E and between the both of us, we have $5 left. We pull to the side of the road, look through his trunk for about 5 minutes until we find one of his old tricks that involved a $20 bill. We rip apart the trick and use the $20 to pay for just enough gas to make it home.

To this day, I've never been so happy to see a $20 bill in my entire life
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03-30-2011 , 05:17 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdwarriors5
When me and my friend just turned 18, we went up to Turningstone in upstate NY with 2k each. He drove and before I tell the rest let me preface it by saying that he used to do magic tricks for little kid's bdays on the side for some extra cash, so he always had some tricks laying around his car.

So we go up, win a little in poker, then hit the table games...


Needless to say, halfway through the trip home his tank is on E and between the both of us, we have $5 left. We pull to the side of the road, look through his trunk for about 5 minutes until we find one of his old tricks that involved a $20 bill. We rip apart the trick and use the $20 to pay for just enough gas to make it home.

To this day, I've never been so happy to see a $20 bill in my entire life
LOL What happens if you get carded? under 21 right?
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03-30-2011 , 05:19 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by koop149
LOL What happens if you get carded? under 21 right?
Turningstone is the only casino in the country that is 18 and over
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03-30-2011 , 05:44 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdwarriors5
Turningstone is the only casino in the country that is 18 and over
So wrong.
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03-30-2011 , 06:40 PM
someone told me this story yesterday

some cops are getting neighbor complaints about kids going in and out of a house.. they think they are selling drugs up to no good

cops sees kid walk out of the house and drives off.. cops pulls them over and finds a his laptop. Tells the kids that his own laptop is stolen and that they need to do a search of the house to look for more stolen laptops.

kid gives them consent to come in and they find a marijuana grow etc...
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03-31-2011 , 02:45 PM
i know a guy who got pulled over, dint have his licence on him so he told the cop to follow him home to avoid a 250$ ticket
brought the cop right to his grow op
he is now doing weekends in jail for 800 plants
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03-31-2011 , 03:03 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by bursito
i know a guy who got pulled over, dint have his licence on him so he told the cop to follow him home to avoid a 250$ ticket
brought the cop right to his grow op
he is now doing weekends in jail for 800 plants
Only weekends for 800 plants? Seems like he got off easy. How could you not be in jail full time for that size of operation?
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03-31-2011 , 09:08 PM
jail is overcrowded and its canada
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03-31-2011 , 10:10 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Jdwarriors5
Turningstone is the only casino in the country that is 18 and over

Wow, I thought that when I was there, but I thought they were just turning a blind eye. That place is wild, bring your own booze! lol
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03-31-2011 , 10:19 PM
This year, right after the superbowl i went clubbing with my friend. I ended up flipping for like 4 hours with my friend on an iphone.

I lost 35k

at least i was really drunk and not really seeing what was happening
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03-31-2011 , 10:56 PM
I made a random 5k bet during the superbowl on emmanuel sanders having under 2.5 receptions. In the first quarter he caught 2 balls, and I jokingly said I needed him to have a career ending injury for me to win. A few minutes later he's being carted off the field. Hated to feel happy seeing that, but all I could think was bink!

How do I say career ending rather than game ending?
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03-31-2011 , 11:44 PM
FMK, what kind of return did that 5k bet payout?
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04-01-2011 , 01:54 AM
even (otherside was -120 so I was the dog).
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04-01-2011 , 03:36 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by feedmykids
I made a random 5k bet during the superbowl on emmanuel sanders having under 2.5 receptions. In the first quarter he caught 2 balls, and I jokingly said I needed him to have a career ending injury for me to win. A few minutes later he's being carted off the field. Hated to feel happy seeing that, but all I could think was bink!

How do I say career ending rather than game ending?
Power of suggestion itt

Congrats brah, you're a voodoo master.
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04-01-2011 , 04:10 AM
If only I was a chess master
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04-01-2011 , 07:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by feedmykids
I made a random 5k bet during the superbowl on emmanuel sanders having under 2.5 receptions. In the first quarter he caught 2 balls, and I jokingly said I needed him to have a career ending injury for me to win. A few minutes later he's being carted off the field. Hated to feel happy seeing that, but all I could think was bink!

How do I say career ending rather than game ending?
wiat so what if he made 2.4 receptions? (what??)
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04-01-2011 , 08:22 AM
You don't get line-setting do you canoodles.
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04-01-2011 , 08:34 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by absolutefish
You don't get line-setting do you canoodles.
y dnt u just say 2 or less?
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04-01-2011 , 11:08 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by canoodles
y dnt u just say 2 or less?
coz then they'd have to say 2 or more on the opposite end and lines would cross..

its very simple the way lines are set with .5
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