Quote:
Originally Posted by wiscopollock
DGIHarris - I appreciate the comments and I'm not sure if you have ever attended a GA meeting, but if you have, I think you'd understand that it is hard to attend meetings consistently and truly convince yourself you are 'cured'. There are guys with 3,5,10, and 20 years of sobriety who slip, and I'm not foolish enough to think that my paltry amount of sobriety is = to a cure. - Further I know myself....
I could gamble again tomorrow, I know that. And the past is the past, I clearly made questionable decisions, and I have to accept that. I posted this story because it fits the bill and I think provides a no bull**** look at a real degen story - hopefully no over glorification...just the play-by-play of events and my twisted logics at the time.
You are more than welcome to take this information and speculate as to whether or not I will gamble again (I'm sure it's a fun exercise) - and assuming it's not BS, I appreciate your sincere feedback - but that is not the reason I shared the story.
I know, I just saw that one snippet in your post towards the end and it made warning bells go off in my head because those are just the little tidbits the demon likes to sneak into our heads to set us up. That was just the point of my post. I know you are not saying you are cured, but a part of our unconscious wants us to believe we are or that we are in control and that mother****ing demon is just setting us up. Note I say "us" and not just you.
And for what it's worth I have been to GA and I actually prefer AA to GA even though I don't drink and I've never done drugs. For some reason my best self therapy came from going to all the A's, GA, NA, and AA and truthfully I think the gambling addiction is the worst addiction. If an alcoholic falls of the wagon and binges for a weekend he only goes through a few hundred dollars. But when a gambler falls off the wagon and degens for a weekend he can literally bankrupct himself and blow through an entire life savings.
Quote:
Originally Posted by POCKET ROCKETS OOO
Damn Harris that's the most accurate description of the degen bug I've ever read.
Kudos.
Yeah, I've had many a busto night curled up in the fetal position on my bed thinking about it over the years. I do have a couple of stories posted in this thread way back...
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ralynx
Must've been horrible playing some crappy machines at the airport and then boarding your flight. Feels man, feels.
There is no worse feeling than that, or in my case there have been times I was so busto that I couldn't afford the plane ticket home (one way tickets are the devil) and had to scrap together money for a Greyhound bus ticket
. Man does that suck goat balls
I remember once I was being busto at the Vegas airport waiting for my flight back home and I decide to take my last $10 and play some slots. I'm looking at the row of slot machines wondering which one to pick, I've got it narrowed down to 3 different $1 Wheel of Fortune machines (oh, by the way it's worth mentioning that i HATE slot machines, I really F****ing hate them and have no desire to play them). Anyways, so I'm staring at the two on the ends and the one in the middle. I just have a feeling that one of these is going to hit. I decide to play the one on the right. So I put in my $10 and begin to spin. I'm doing okay, get up $50 when an old gray hair sits down at the slot machine in the middle and on her second pull she wins the spin, the wheel spins and boom, she wins $1000 just like that.
I then proceed to lose every single pull and drop the $50 and now I'm flat busted.
I fly home, get to my car, and then am sick as I realize that I have to pay for parking and I have no money. I have just enough money in my car to take the bus home. So I take the bus home, scrounge around my house looking under the couch, bed, drawers, pants pockets, etc to scrap together the $20 to get my car. Then I've got to take the bus back to the airport get my car and the whole delay was like 3 hours of my time all the while I'm stewing because just two days prior I was sitting at the roulette table with $15k in front of me and now I'm F***ing busto scrounging around for change to take the bus and get my car out of parking.
and during all this, in the background I can hear the demon laughing...
I f****ing hate that demon
Last edited by dgiharris; 10-02-2014 at 03:27 PM.