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Degen Stories.... Degen Stories....

04-15-2014 , 01:10 PM
Has 2 good looking cousins. Da ****?
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04-15-2014 , 11:50 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by XaQ Morphy
OK we'll let you know.
I loled
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04-16-2014 , 01:03 PM
Drove 1&1/2hrs to a casino for the weekend because they were comping my room. I brought $800 and after my 1st 5mins there I had that doubled thanks to hitting quad aces on a double bonus vp machine for a $800 win. After this I went directly to the poker room and bought into a 1/3nl game for $500. After about 2hrs of play I cashed out a little over $1200 for a $700 profit. At this point I have almost 3x the amount of cash I brought with me and am feeling unstoppable. I decide I should take my $2300 into the pit and make a killing playing all the stupid casino games because with this kind of luck how could i possibly lose? Many hours and beers later I am heading up to my "free" hotel room with $0 left in my pocket.
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04-16-2014 , 01:43 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Brow2821
Hunter S. Thompson wannabe ITT
yeah!
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04-19-2014 , 04:42 AM
online blackjack is rigged.. i have 3997 in my acct.. so i bet 3.. lose.. 6.. ose.. 12.. lose.. 24.. lose.. 48.. lose.. 96.. lose..192 lose.. 384.. lose..



THEY KNOW WHAT YOU WANT TO DO AND FIX IT ACCORDINGLY.. I WANTED 3 DOLLARS AND THEY STOLE OVER 600 FROM ME.. ****ING CRIMINALS.. ILL ****ING MURDER CHRIS CHRISTIE
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04-19-2014 , 04:44 AM
and of ****ING COURSE i bet 10$ the last hand and win.. THESE MOTHER ****ERS WILL FEEL WHAT ITS LIKE OT BE MURDERED. I WILL ****ING KILL THEM WHILE I LOOK INTO THEIR EYES.. THEY ARE ****ING DEAD
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04-19-2014 , 06:47 AM
best two posts of this thread
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04-19-2014 , 07:28 AM
Should of doubled again champ
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04-19-2014 , 11:42 AM
lol i was a wee bit hammered. my bad mod! dont fine me again!
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04-19-2014 , 12:00 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hashy
and of ****ING COURSE i bet 10$ the last hand and win.. THESE MOTHER ****ERS WILL FEEL WHAT ITS LIKE OT BE MURDERED. I WILL ****ING KILL THEM WHILE I LOOK INTO THEIR EYES.. THEY ARE ****ING DEAD
can this be deleted? lol
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04-19-2014 , 01:46 PM
How to lose your roll in 15 minutes:

You get tilt after losing like 2hours of grind against ****ing donks that hit every ****ing time. and looking at ur EV line at 1/2 way it should be. You go to HU to get them back and...

http://prntscr.com/3anhne $12

http://prntscr.com/3ani7b $30

http://prntscr.com/3aniqs $50 (k hits on turn)

http://prntscr.com/3anjab $100 (ofc he hits)

Final $100 I would stop if I had won this one.


***** LuckyAcePoker.com Hand History for Game 578142854 *****
$50/$100 Blinds No Limit Holdem - *** 19 04 2014 18:27:16
Tournament #57524741 $100 + $4 - Table #1 (Real Money)
Seat 9 is the button
Total number of players : 2
Seat 4: iEatStacks ( $1,210 )
Seat 9: DrDavy11 ( $1,790 )
DrDavy11 posts small blind [$50]
iEatStacks posts big blind [$100]
** Dealing down cards **
Dealt to iEatStacks [ 6s, 6h ]
DrDavy11 raises [$1,740]
iEatStacks calls [$1,110]
** Dealing flop ** [ 2d, Qd, As ]
** Dealing turn ** [ Td ]
** Dealing river ** [ 3d ]
** Summary **
iEatStacks shows [ 6s, 6h ]
DrDavy11 shows [ Qc, 5c ]
DrDavy11 collected [ $2,420 ]
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04-19-2014 , 05:20 PM
Haha hashy's a drunk degen.

Also, this line from crimsonchin made me laugh so ****ing hard why didn't it get more love: "You will literally **** the **** out of a girl."
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04-20-2014 , 01:07 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheOpinionMan
once when i busted my roll starting out i had no food. so i ate a tin of dog food which i stole from the supermarket
Ok, this quote is like 5 years old but why wouldn't you steal human food?
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04-20-2014 , 08:13 AM
This thread is amazing.....going to add my own in a bit
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04-21-2014 , 12:41 AM
moar tl:dr stories please, need my fix
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04-21-2014 , 02:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hashy
and of ****ING COURSE i bet 10$ the last hand and win.. THESE MOTHER ****ERS WILL FEEL WHAT ITS LIKE OT BE MURDERED. I WILL ****ING KILL THEM WHILE I LOOK INTO THEIR EYES.. THEY ARE ****ING DEAD
rofl serious degenage itt
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04-21-2014 , 02:49 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by hashy
can this be deleted? lol
Haha nice back pedal
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04-21-2014 , 05:23 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by wilkcards
Ok, this quote is like 5 years old but why wouldn't you steal human food?
misgrab obv
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04-21-2014 , 05:44 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by siebenacht
misgrab obv
I'm voting for made up story
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04-21-2014 , 07:30 PM
@pokerman11...were waiting
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04-21-2014 , 09:50 PM
how degen is it to buy stuff for people on my credit card and take the money they give me to the casino?
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04-21-2014 , 10:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by GoingBroke777
how degen is it to buy stuff for people on my credit card and take the money they give me to the casino?
Pretty degen but way better than thievery.
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04-21-2014 , 10:28 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by WhyDid I doThat :|
Laughed for a solid minute there
ahahahaha this is to epic
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04-21-2014 , 10:49 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by legallyShoved
Pretty degen but way better than thievery.
Meh, pretty standard at this point. It was dramatized in Reality Bites back in the 90s. I say go for it.
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04-22-2014 , 12:12 AM
Quote:
Originally Posted by legallyShoved
Pretty degen but way better than thievery.
ok not sure if this story fits in so ,anyways

So, it’s basically like a game within the game for me. I have a Amex card, and its a charge card so has no limit, but the catch is that it has to be paid in full every month. So basically what I will do, if I know someone is going to buying something online and they are using there bank card, I will tell them, hey let me buy it for you, I get points with my Amex card and since your using your debt card its like taking out the cash out of bank right away anyways. So I basically get an interest free loan for some times up to 60 days, since If they buy it on the first day of my new billing cycle, I wont have to pay for it until NeXT’s month statement comes in, so when it works best, I have 60 days to take there money and run it up at roulette or poker.

When that does not work, I have to find someone else to buy something for to pay for last months purchase, and it’s a never-ending cycle.

So one time I buy a 15-inch MacBook pro for someone. About 2.2k. So I play the game right where, on first day of new cycle, buy it for him, bam 60days. As an incentive I tell him, pay me 1100 now and other 1100 later.I did this partly to make him feel like he got something out of the deal, but more because I knew what was going to happen if it I took it all.
So I get the money from him, and go to play some poker, lose 500. Its ok still have 59 more days. I don't get to go to casino that often, since I work and go to school full time. Fast forward 2 weeks, Amex calls me and says that with that purchase plus my previous months balance, that my total is too high, even though they say no limit, so they want me to pay 1600.The nice lady on the phone asks if it's ok to authorize the payment over phone right now. Umm...I end up convincing them that I need to wait for my paycheck on Friday and it will clear by Monday, so how does next Tuesday sound? Ok, we can do that, they say. Well since there really is no paycheck coming this friday.... back downtown.

Ok so I really want to go and run it up on roulette I mean I am due, I have been backing off of it for a while, I'm ready for that heater, So as I take the 30 min drive to the Casino, I come to my senses. I have never missed a payment on my Amex and want to keep it that way, so I go to poker, lose 400. I really don't know why I play this game and not roulette, anyways take the last 200 over to the roulette tables. So I get to my table, and put my bets down I have enough for two spins. 10 bucks STR on 5 numbers, and 50 on black. So as I wait for the dealer to let it go, I look at the 3 other tables, and I can't even pick a table correctly, If I would have picked 2 of the other 3, I would have hit my damn numbers, any ways 15 seconds later nothing. last spin is no good either. So I know I have a degen problem, but the numbers guy in me, always has a running total, of how much i'm going to spend over the next month, and How much I need to pay off on this, and how much I will get from my job and so on. So i'm kinda controlled in that regard, but this was a curve ball, I never thought that they would really call and ask for a early payment, no limit obviously does not mean no limit.

The worst feeling is exiting through the tunnel where it's the only way in and the only way out of the gaming floor. to the parking garage elevator. I'm looking at the ground as I walk, and am swearing at myself inside and about how unlucky I am, and that I will get them next time. I don’t even want to look at the faces of the people who are just walking in still with a smile on there face, and money in there pockets. To rub salt on the wound, I get to elevator and as the group of people walk out, one of them looks at me and as they walk out, says to the group, you can tell he lost, all I hear is the laughter echo, and my reflection on the mirrored finish grow as the doors closes to see the emotion or lack of on my face. Every time I get into the elevator, I tell my self that this was the last time, but the rush you get for that 15 seconds that feels like an eternity, watching the ball hover over one of my numbers like its about to drop, and as I put my hands up to celebrate, it bounces out, is one that I just cannot let go. Anyway, I end up having to call my buddy up and tell him, that I need the other half now, due to some error on Amexs part that I need to pay them now. He does not resist, and I put that money straight in the bank and pay it off, with the money I had in there, and then have to scrap by until I find someone else to buy something for.

theres like 10 more stories like this, and it keeps going. So I’m basically working my minimum wage job just to pay for my lasts month **** ups, and if I get lucky and find someone to buy something for, try and run it up. All i need is that one big score, take 100 to 2000 or 3 and end this never ending cycle.

Went to Vegas with 4 guys, put the flights on my card, that gave me 1100 plus what I had saved up, as gambling money in Vegas. Might talk about that Vegas trip of blowing my whole roll down to last 50 in the first 24-hour into a 6 day trip , Betting way much more than I should.

damn wrote allot more than i thought, it was. sorry for the TL/dr gang.
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