This is one I bet you all have never heard of. This is 100% true story and I still can't believe it after I woke up today.

First of all, I'm a pretty seasoned poker player who recently moved out to Vegas to play professionally. I've been making a decent living online and hit a score here and there but cash games are my bread and butter. About a month ago I moved out to Vegas and roomed up with a few guys off craigslist. Before anybody wants to say anything smart, I live in a 5 bedroom house with a pool and WIFI covering the whole thing. I don't have to pay a whole lot and I have infinite kitchen access. I moved here from Sacramento which is basically the armpit of America so I've been pretty happy to shack up here.

I tore it up for the first month at the Bellagio mainly and decided last night that I was going to take a night for myself. I am not usually one that has to pay for a hooker's services but my house is so sweet I really don't leave it that much. Now without sounding gay let me just say that I'm 44 years old and I know I'm not an ugly man. I was banging beach bunnies all over Europe in the 80's and 90's before I decided to settle down. I have NEVER had a problem getting women. So I boot up TER (The Erotic Review) and cruise around trying to find a decent woman at a decent price. I don't have any luck on there so I load up craigslist because I know there is ALWAYS some top shelf V-JayJay on there.

I come across this drop dead gorgeous blonde who appears to be about 30 and is offering her services at in-call for 300. She has a BANGING body and a great rack. PERFECT. Pick up the I-phone (purchased with first day of winnings after moving here) and place the call. She's nice enough and I give her my addy and we agree to meet up at 10pm last night. I get home about 8:30 and shower/shave and put on some cologne and dim the lights a bit. Sure enough right at 10' o clock there is a knock on the front door. I open it up and invite her back to my bedroom. She keeps giving me these weird looks and looking up at the celing and I don't know what her problem is.

We get back to my room and I'm just making friendly conversation with her when I notice she keeps staring at my face. I'm not talking about my eyes, my face in general. I'm starting to get uncomfortable and ask her what's the problem? She looks at me with this kind of disgusted look and says "I just have this thing with craters... I just can't do this.. I'm sorry" as she turns around and walks right back out the door.

WOW! RIGHT? This girl is a HOOKER with standards? Give me a damn break. I have a few small spots on my face from acne popping when I was a younger but that is literally the ONLY thing wrong with me. This is mildy embarassing but i'm posting it in hopes of some encouragement and some downgrading talk about vegas hookers in general. Has anybody had any experience like this before? Here is a picture of me for the naysayers so you can obviously see I'm not hideous or anything.



Thanks Guys!

inc 15+ page thread

this

Damn man, that's rough, all I can really tell you is that every soul seeketh an object and cherisheth a desire, and day and night
striveth to attain its aim. One craveth riches, another thirsteth for glory
and still another yearneth for fame, for art, for prosperity and the like.

Yet finally all are doomed to loss and disappointment.
One and all they leave behind them all that is theirs and empty-handed hasten to the realm
beyond, and all their labours shall be in vain.

To dust they all return, denuded, depressed, disheartened and in utter despair.

EPIC IN THE MAKING!!!!

Your selfesteem is really really low.

Why would you want a 30 year old hooker?

Why not just go to a casino and pick up one of the tight little bitches who claim to have just turned 21?

maybe it was the valtrex on ur dresser....oh....wait...

This will go down in 2+2 folklore!

hi chodezilla

fold life

Post your post in casual encounters and you will get a very nice lady to accommodate you. If nothing happens for the first couple of days, keep posting.

You may even get a non-pro regular willing to "date" you regularly.

Prepare for a lot of spam, however.

Gotta keep your pimp hand strong and say

"What did you say to me bitch?"

Then SIIHP.

??????

Profit

hahahah epic.

ul man. but epic story = epic thread

HOF

You guys are getting played, that's Jewdonk (Marty something) from NWP as posted by someone from Borispoker. The real humor in this is that everything in the OP is almost exactly how Marty would have put it, but there is a running gag on his craters.


http://www.borispoker.com/showthread...7604#post67604

Did you try hitting her?

It's going to be a *great* weekend.

Move up where they respect your acne

ROFL
she just saw you got real cash and wants you to offer more to her services...

man, I'd probably give up on life.

Link to craigsslist ad?

OP just found a way to prevent AIDS... a vest

WTG on ruining a fine thread and a what would have been a fine gag on that crater faced gentleman