April Low-Content Thread

[RudeboyOi]

so to start things off ive been running extremely well online playing on my friends account 6max and huhu lhe. i started with $11 and now have over $4400 on there .

last sunday, we are at the bar that we usually hang out at. there are these two guys there, one that goes to the local university and the other is a sports writer for the local newspaper who we usually play darts with. anyways we're drinking and playing darts and on sunday in indiana the bars close early. we dont want to call it a night yet so decide its a good idea to take a trip to the boats.

we start driving there, me and my friend, and one of the guys we play darts with. we are like a block away from the casino when my friends engine dies so we roll into a parking lot that happens to be the public library. we cant get the car started and arent sure whats wrong with it so we start making some phonecalls to see if we can get someone to pick us up. we get a hold of the other guy who we were playing darts with earlier and he offers to come get us.

while we are sitting there waiting, this cop car does a turnaround and parks in the parking lot across the street from us. we arent sure if hes spying on us wondering what we are doing or not so i suggest we get out of the car and push the car into a parking spot so we dont look overly suspicious. since the cop parked there, we didnt want the other guy to show up there since he's been drinking too and probably wont pass a breathilizer and tell him to just meet us at the casino down the street.

we arent sure what to do with the car since the cop was sitting there so im the most sober one of the bunch and decide to go approach him and talk to him. as im walking across the street, this truck driver stops and asks me where the vitamin factory is and i say im sorry i have no idea i dont live in this city. well he stops his truck in the middle of the street and proceeds to run over to the officers car. he gets out and they start talking and gives him directions. i approach the officer and explain to him the situation we were having and he said he thought nothing of us sitting there in the car since people routinely do so he wasnt suspicious of us at all. he just likes parking in that spot to finish up any work he has to do.

i explain to him that our car died and we arent sure whats wrong with it. he offers to come take a look. i doubt my friends want the cop to come over to the vehicle but i dont want to say no to raise any suspicions so i hop in and we drive over across the street. as soon as we get to my friends car, he takes down my friends license plate number and two more cruisers roll up. im guessing my friends are really nervous at this point but we all keep our cool while the cop is examining our car trying to help. we thought it might just need some gas so he offers to take us to the gas station if we had a gascan but we didnt neither did any of the other officers that pulled up. we tell him we planned on going to the casino so he offers to give us a lift to the casino while we wait for someone to help.

we ask if its okay if we leave the car there overnight and he told us he'll radio in that its okay being there so we got nothing to worry about. we all hop into the squad car and he taxis us over to the casino. while we were in the car the guy we play darts with was being all drunk and stupid asking the cop all these idiotic questions. im just thinking to myself god hes so gonna bust us but nothing happened. he let us out and i asked for his name and thanked him for helping us out.

we proceed to go into the casino to go to the restroom. the other guy we played darts with pulls up and tells us he doesnt want to come in and just wants to leave. i said id be a minute i want to go get some coffee since i was freezing being out in the cold for so long. the first guy we played darts with really wanted to gamble and thought that "coffee" was just a codeword for wanting to go gamble quickly. he follows me into the casino and seems extremely dissapointed when i actually go and get coffee.

we proceed to leave the casino and head to the gas station figuring the problem might be that we were low on gas. we fill up water bottles and coffee cups with gasoline. so we're all sitting in the car reeking of gasoline hoping none of it spills. when we get back to the car, my friend makes a funnel out of the cardboard of a beer carton and we put the gas in. it doesnt help any so we just drive home.

so all in all the night couldve ended horribly but instead we met a nice cop that even gave us a ride to the casino .

[9.5fingershuffle]

drinking and driving is dumb

[RudeboyOi]

Originally Posted by cgrohman

drinking and driving is dumb

indeed and this story provides a fine example of how stupid it is to take unnecessary risks in life considering how close we were to being arrested.

[KenoVictoryLap]

Coffee cups of gasoline? What could possibly go wrong.

[jesse8888]

Originally Posted by David2+2

Coffee cups of gasoline? What could possibly go wrong.

If you were drunk enough to do this, it is beyond amazing he didn't make one of you blow. That said, you basically bluffed him off his hand by approaching him first. Bold aggressive poker will put your opponents to tough decisions while being a calling station gets you a ride downtown IMO.

[Captain R]

Originally Posted by PokerBob

Putting dishes in the dishwasher is not "washing the dishes."

The key to being successful in life is to be efficient. Today, I fed the kids, unloaded a dishwasher, washed some dishes, took my kids to school, changed the oil in my car, played poker for 4.5 hours, rotated my tires, and worked a full day at work.

And it's not even 5:30.

Spoiler:

OK, I didn't really change my oil or rotate my tires. I took my car to the dealer to get an oil change and went to America's Tire Co. for a free rotation.

[jesse8888]

He also open limped the lowjack and watched in horror as I flopped jacksons full of 5s hu in the bb

[leo doc]

Originally Posted by cgrohman

drinking and driving is dumb

This is soooo true. I can't tell you how many times I've spilled my beer trying to do so.

[that_pope]

Originally Posted by private joker

Are they trying to give me heart attacks? One of the worst feelings in poker is tabling your hand first, thinking it's a winner, then having the opponent turn his hand face up instead of mucking it.

I think that is my specialty when I am bluffing and first to act. I turn my hand over confidently like it is the nuts, and both the player I am in the pot with and the dealer struggle for like 5 seconds to figure out what hand I have.

I had this gem last week, I bet the river with 42o (in the BB no doubt) and the board read something like 568TQ (not in that order) and when called I proudly turned my hand over, and after everyone was confused for like 10 seconds, I grabbed all 5 board cards and pushed them towards me (I was in the 5 seat at a 9 handed table), then the idiot finally turns over his T9.

[leo doc]

Originally Posted by that_pope

then the idiot finally turns over his T9.

If I buy dinner next week, you promise not to call me an idiot if I do that?

[egocidal]

I got a job. In an industry where the mailroom is a training ground for the battle of corporate scum sucking the life out of artists, I'm pretty sure I just got a job in the biggest %^$&ing one. I can only hope to wake up without children or a friends by the time I'm 30, but with about $5,000,000 in gold coins, in a room that I can jump into like that cartoon duck withthe monocale

[RudeboyOi]

Originally Posted by jesse8888

If you were drunk enough to do this, it is beyond amazing he didn't make one of you blow. That said, you basically bluffed him off his hand by approaching him first. Bold aggressive poker will put your opponents to tough decisions while being a calling station gets you a ride downtown IMO.

it goes to show that poker is useful even off the table.

anyone watch the tv show urban legends?

basically the jist of the show is they show three stories, two of them are fake and one of them is real.

the key to figuring out which one is real is figuring out who the actors are and who the real people are based on how they should be reacting and the way in which they speak whether it sounds rehearsed or real.

[that_pope]

Originally Posted by leo doc

If I buy dinner next week, you promise not to call me an idiot if I do that?

Of course I would never do that! (Not like I did it to his face, only in this forum). But please make sure I know who you are before I play in your game, just to make sure!

[Captain R]

6-handed, fishy open-limps in EP, I raise 87 in cutoff, button fishy coldcalls, blinds fold. EP limp-re-raises with only 1 chip left (oops), we call.

Flop: JJ3 (3 players, 10.5 sb)
Checked around.

Turn: 5
EP bets 1 chip, I raise to 8 chips, button cold-calls (oops!).

River A
I bet, button folds. EP insta-mucks his hand without showing and I drag the $225 main.

Standard turn raise for fold-equity against the all-in player, amirite?

[jesse8888]

That was just incredible.